The Hero (3)
"What is it that drives you to fight so desperately?"
In the beginning, I really only did it to save my own skin. I figured I would die anyway if I ran, and that fighting the Calamities was my only path to survival. Looking back, abandoning my duty and fleeing might actually have given me a higher chance of survival than facing them. But because the Hero of the original novel did not run, I picked up the sword and searched for a way to survive. I sought out Daphne and recruited her. I bickered with Georg but eventually earned his respect. I crossed paths with Marianne, entirely by chance. I began to hear the voice of the Holy Sword and learned so much from her.
Even before coming to the North, I had crossed paths with countless people, and after arriving in Evernode, I met even more. They were not mere letters on a page. The fear I felt while fighting was no illusion, and the wounds I sustained during training brought real, throbbing pain. At some point, I had forgotten the fact that I was an outsider who didn't belong to this world.
Click. I opened the wooden box. The crown, woven from thorny vines, revealed itself. I looked up at Marianne, who was sitting across from me, and spoke.
"You've seen me wear this before, so you know... but succeeding this time won't be easy."
Marianne nodded. To my eyes, her head bobbed stiffly, like a wooden puppet's. She was anxious, which was unlike her. No, 'unlike her' was the wrong way to put it. It would be stranger not to be anxious in a situation like this. I had ended up asking a terribly unfair favor of her.
"If I fail to overcome the trial, I'll lose consciousness and collapse. If that happens, wake me up by any means necessary and take me to Rhys immediately."
It was a scenario I didn't even want to contemplate. Frowning, I picked up the Crown of Thorns. There was no time to waste. I placed the crown directly onto my head.
As always, mana flooded from the crown, seeping into my mind. Feeling its energy course through my body, I slowly circulated the mana in my heart, beginning to attune to it. Time flows incredibly slowly during the trial. Keeping that in mind, I closed my eyes.
Crack! The darkness behind my closed eyelids deepened into a pitch-black void, signaling the start of the trial. The dark view seemed to flicker with light for a brief moment before plunging me into absolute blackness. With a dizzying sensation of weightlessness, my consciousness in the mental world began to plummet into an endless abyss.
I forced my eyes wide open, desperate to maintain consciousness. My body within the mental world felt sharper, more vivid than usual. How long had I been falling? Before I knew it, I was standing at the very bottom of the darkness.
"...Where is this?"
I tried to move. My limbs and torso felt bound, as if someone were violently pulling me back from behind, preventing me from taking a single step forward. I frowned and struggled, but I could only manage the slightest twitch. What kind of trial is this supposed to be? I don't have much time. Just as I tried to channel more power to break free, a voice began to echo in my ears.
"That is the approximate weight of the salvation you wish to carry."
The voice sounded like a man's, yet also like a woman's. I raised my head and looked around to find its source, but there was nothing to see. Only an endless expanse of pitch-black darkness.
"And ahead of you lies the path you wish to tread."
I couldn't see a thing. Was there even a path to begin with? A path of thorns would have been infinitely better, at least then I could see where I was going.
"Will you still carry that weight and walk forward?"
I gnashed my teeth. I hadn't come here to have some pathetic resolve tested. If a weight was to be placed on me, so be it; if I had to walk, I would walk. But if doing so meant I could obtain the power of this holy relic, if it meant I could protect those people...
"Yeah. There's no rule saying I can't."
I spat the words out and forced my body to move. But as I tried to press forward, my body—which had only been twitching—grew exponentially heavier, refusing to obey my commands. It felt as though my limbs would shatter if I tried to force them.
"Damn... it..."
I couldn't move. My limbs felt nailed down, no longer even twitching. I was like a beetle flipped onto its back, flailing my limbs in the empty air. Or rather, desperately trying to flail them.
"Surely you did not take this lightly. The weight of salvation is by no means light."
The voice was obnoxious. A curse rose to my throat, threatening to burst out. This... a mere weight like this. I twisted and writhed with all my might. My body still wouldn't budge.
"I ask you again. Do you still intend to carry this weight and walk forward?"
"Yes."
I didn't have the luxury of giving a long-winded answer. Squeezing out what little breath I had, I answered the voice and tried to move my legs first. *Crack, crack.* It was my own body that was breaking. I stopped, unable to even stretch my limbs properly. Meanwhile, my body didn't just stop; it began to be dragged backward.
"In the end, salvation will drag you down with it, plunging you into the depths below."
I looked back. Though it was the same darkness, I felt an instinctual dread that crossing over that line behind me would be fatal. I would merge with the mass dragging my back, falling eternally into the abyss, never to return. And then I would wake up in reality, crushed by a devastating sense of defeat, forced to declare my failure.
"If that happens, you will never be able to climb back up. You will become one with the hands in the darkness, falling into a bottomless pit."
Creak. I strained with every fiber of my being, trying to anchor my dragging body. But I was pulled backward helplessly. Powerless, incompetent.
"The cliff is but a single step behind you, Hero."
"Don't make me laugh..."
It felt like my body would shatter if I tried to resist. Like I would be torn into pieces and vanish into the void. But I held on. Whether I shattered here from resisting or fell into the abyss with them without a fight, the end was the same. A spine-chilling wind blew from behind. Blood vessels bulged in my eyes as I dragged my body forward.
"You could easily free yourself from these shackles. With your strength, it is entirely possible. Even if you choose to do so, I am willing to grant you a portion of my power."
"A portion is useless. I need the strength to sever the Giant's neck. I need the power to save people."
Thud. Thud. My heels touched the edge of the precipice. In a ragged, desperate voice, as if speaking to myself, I answered the voice.
"Because... I promised to save them."
"Will you promise...?"
I looked down at my right hand. I remembered the tiny hand that had hooked its pinky around mine. That weight, that warmth, the tears wiped away by a thumb, and the voice that had finally stopped crying—these were things I had never known before. They were things that could never be read from mere letters on a page.
I thought of the soldiers of Evernode, laughing and shouting boisterously, and the people strolling the streets during the Midsummer Festival. They were not letters, and I, wielding the Holy Sword, was no longer a reader. I could not remain a mere bystander.
And then, a single question pierced through my mind. There are those who try to save others even when they lack the power to do so. Why is it that those who actually possess the power refuse to save anyone? It was the same in that godforsaken world of letters, and it was no different in the world outside of them.
"I will not abandon people."
Call it hypocrisy if you want. Let it go misunderstood. Call it self-satisfaction, or even arrogance. Even if I was just a guy who accidentally fell into a novel and happened to grasp the Holy Sword. I had the power to save them if I chose to. Therefore, there was no reason not to.
"I will not abandon those who need salvation."
Is that the salvation you desire? someone asked in my mind. I nodded and answered. Yes.
Screeech. My dragging body ground to a halt. Standing with my feet right on the edge of the cliff, I exhaled a ragged breath. I was no longer being pulled back. However, the weight hanging onto my body remained.
"Is that your choice?"
"I will gladly shoulder it. Even if it was thrust upon me against my will."
I spoke and adjusted my stance. I could move my body, if only a little.
"Then show me."
"If that's what it takes for you to give me your power."
Very slowly, my right foot began to move forward. Sweating buckets, I took a step. Just one step. It wasn't even moving forward in a true sense; it was merely retracing the path I had been dragged down.
"Let's go."
As I leaned forward, it felt as though my waist would tear apart. I forced my body to shift its center of gravity. If I could just bring my left foot forward, I would have taken a single, complete step.
"Good."
The other leg didn't follow naturally. It felt like it was tearing. Caught by whatever was holding me, my body felt as though it would shatter and disintegrate. No, it won't tear. It won't break. I'm the only one who thinks that. I grit my teeth and moved my remaining leg. *Crack, crack.* It didn't matter if it broke. As long as I could take one step forward. As long as I could move away from that pit. I will walk.
"There may be no light ahead of you," so said the voice.
"As long as I don't fall, I can keep searching for the light."
"The light may be an illusion. It may be nothing more than cruel hope."
"You won't know that until you find it. And more importantly..."
If I was searching for the light, it meant I would be moving further and further away from the abyss.
"Then we can worry about finding the light instead of worrying about falling into the pit. We'll be looking toward hope, not fearing despair."
When that time came, the hands gripping my back would also find their own light, be liberated, and vanish.
"Wouldn't that be the moment my salvation is complete?"
"Even if those left behind wander in that darkness?"
"Wandering and despairing is better than vanishing without ever having the chance to try."
I spoke and took another step forward.
"Right?"
It felt as though the Holy Sword's voice echoed from somewhere.
Strength surged into my hands.
The scene before my eyes began to crack. Fissures formed in the darkness, letting light leak through. I took another step. Then, I reached my hand into the crack. Like cracks spreading across a sheet of ice, the fractures rippled through the entire darkness before finally shattering into dust.
"Splendid, Hero," the voice whispered faintly from afar. "I shall aid you."
I opened my eyes, panting heavily. Marianne's face was right in front of mine. She was cupping my face with both of her hands. I wrapped my hands over hers and nodded. Her hands trembled slightly as she pulled them away from my face.
"...Are you alright?"
"Yeah."
The stinging sensation of thorns on my head was gone. My body felt lighter than ever before. I felt as though I could do anything right now. Looking down at the floor, the crown had shattered, reduced to dry, withered branches scattered on the ground.
At her words, I looked into the mirror in the corner of the bedroom. A glowing halo, resembling the shape of the crown, was floating gently above my head.
"Did I succeed?" I clenched and unclenched my fist, then checked the clock. Only thirty minutes had passed since I began the trial. Yet, in that mental world, it felt as though I had spent dozens of hours.
I gently wrapped my hand around the hilt of my sword. The grip felt entirely different from usual. It was as if I had drawn a step closer to the Holy Sword.
I slowly nodded and quickly composed my posture. The stirring of mana in my heart was completely different from before. Now, I could go save him.
I turned my head toward Marianne, who had stood up. With trembling eyes, she slowly approached and grabbed my sleeve.
"Thank you for your help." Marianne's grip tightened slightly. It seemed as though she had something she wanted to say, but couldn't find the words. I gently took her hand. Marianne bit her lower lip. Then, as if giving up, she let out a soft sigh, her lips trembling.
"I'll be back."
"Please... return safely."
I walked down the stairs. Rhys and Serin were already waiting on the first floor of our lodging. Rhys's eyes widened in surprise upon seeing me, but his expression quickly melted into a smile of disbelief and joy.
"You've changed. You've grown incomparably stronger."
"And the rescue team?" Rhys nodded. Led by Serin, Evernode's finest knights were looking up at me.
"The Hero's party and I will defend the fortress. So please, do not worry about us and rescue the Grand Duke, Hero."
I nodded and mounted my horse. The steed greeted me with a calmer demeanor than usual. The rescue team and I stood before the fortress gates. The sun was setting.
"Open the gates!" The iron portcullis rose. I drew the Holy Sword, and my horse surged forward of its own accord. A tidal wave of monsters rushed toward us as if they had been waiting. I swung the Holy Sword. Amidst the scattering fragments of monsters, I gazed at the pure white curtain of the Boundary Line. And finally, I declared the single resolve I had forged in my heart.
A hero is one who saves people. From this moment on, I will be a hero.