I'll Bestow the Most Painful Death
The Black Bears, having confirmed their target, burst from the shadows to deliver the most painful death possible. The carriage must have picked up the sounds in the darkness too, because it suddenly surged forward. Clop-clop! Clop-clop!
“Boss! They’re getting away!”
“Surround them!!”
“Yes!”
Seeing this, the Black Bears picked up speed. They were ambush professionals, all former bandits. Catching a carriage that couldn’t reach full speed on a rough mountain path was child’s play. In the blink of an eye they had it completely encircled.
Neigh—!
“You’re surrounded! If you don’t come out, we’ll burn the whole carriage down!”
One of the Black Bears surrounding the coach lit an arrow with flame as he shouted. At those words the carriage door opened and two figures stepped out: the black-haired nobleman Kyle and his maid Elina.
Kyle raised both hands to show he had no intention of fighting.
“Are you… bandits?”
“……”
“If it’s money you want, I’ll give it to you. Let’s not shed blood and simply go our separate ways.”
Ordinary bandits would have taken the deal. No criminal wanted to harass a noble and invite trouble later. But these Black Bears were no ordinary bandits.
“I’m afraid that won’t be possible.”
“…That voice—”
The ranks of Black Bears parted, and Count Purcus Rosenberg rode forward on horseback. He was far thinner than the last time Kyle had seen him, yet that signature laugh remained unchanged.
“Oh ho ho ho… It has been a while, Sir Kyle.”
“Indeed it has, Count Purcus. I never imagined we would meet in a place like this.”
“Nor did I. I had no idea I would encounter you here again, Sir Kyle.”
Though their words were polite, neither man’s eyes were smiling.
Kyle asked with a tense expression, “Would you kindly explain what exactly is happening here?”
“What is there to explain? You are simply reaping what you sowed, Sir Kyle.”
“Reaping what I sowed?”
From atop his horse the Count glared down at him. His eyes burned with pure vengeance and hatred.
“After what you did to me, did you truly believe you could leave the East in peace?”
“The transaction between us was perfectly legal. Actually… considering the market price at the time, I believe I was the one who took the loss.”
The Count’s blackmail to seize the flower fields had been recorded in every official document. Thanks to that, Kyle had been cleared of any speculation charges while the Count was hauled away by the imperial judges.
At Kyle’s calm reply the Count let out a disbelieving laugh.
“Oh ho ho ho… You really do look down on me, don’t you, Sir Kyle?”
“Pardon?”
The Count’s face flushed crimson. Rage and resentment exploded inside him. He jabbed a finger toward the capital and screamed.
“Do you think I don’t know you conspired with those imperial lapdogs in the capital to swindle me?!”
Everyone’s expressions froze. Even the Black Bears looked stunned. Only Kyle remained composed.
“Those are incredibly dangerous words. And do you have any evidence that I swindled you?”
“The fact that I ended up like this is evidence enough. Without that woman from the imperial family backing you, this would never have happened.”
That woman was almost certainly the princess. The moment Purcus learned she had granted Kyle the Agricultural Administration Control Right, he became convinced he had been played by both of them.
But that was merely the Count’s delusion. Kyle answered calmly.
“You’re doing all this… over something so trivial?”
“Do I look like a man who would go to these lengths for mere petty revenge? This is a holy war for my family’s honor.”
“A holy war?”
Purcus drew a staff from within his robes. Though only a 3-Circle mage, he had still learned magic. The staff was his weapon; in knightly terms, he had drawn his sword.
Pointing it at Kyle, he roared.
“……”
“For insulting the Rosenberg family and mocking me, I will make sure you regret it even in hell. Oh ho ho ho!”
Clap…
The Count’s grotesque laughter echoed through the dark forest—until sudden applause rang out.
The one clapping was none other than Kyle. Expressionless, he clapped perfectly in time with the Count’s words.
Clap… Clap…! Clap—! Clap—!
“Why are you clapping? Have you finally lost your mind now that death is upon you?”
“Not at all. It simply sounded like the final will of a dying man, yet no one was responding, so I decided to provide some background audio.”
“Background audio?”
It was perfect. The Count had said every single line I wanted to hear. He hated me for reasons that didn’t exist, wanted revenge on me and my entire family, and had even thrown in an insult against the imperial family. This wasn’t 1+1, it was a full 1+1+1 service. How could I not applaud?
I clapped with genuine appreciation and asked the girl beside me, “Elina, is the recording complete?”
“It is perfect, young master.”
Elina had used the necklace-shaped recording artifact around her neck to capture every word. Just as we had done with Helchen before, we had turned their own actions into irrefutable evidence.
The Count didn’t seem particularly shaken. Instead he raised his voice even louder.
“Hmph! Did you think something like that would let you negotiate now? In any case, I plan to kill that maid as well.”
“Negotiate? Did I look like the sort of person who makes pathetic deals?”
“What?”
He still didn’t seem to understand. I raised my hand and gave the signal.
Snap!
In an instant everything changed. From behind the bandits encircling me, black silhouettes began to leap out.
Slash—!
“Gurgh!”
Whirl! Stab!
“Gurgh!!”
“Y-you bastards—?!”
The figures who emerged from the darkness were my personal guard unit—the ninjas. Their blades and throwing stars slaughtered the outermost bandits in seconds, instantly reversing the encirclement.
“When… when did they…?”
“From the very beginning, Count.”
“What?!”
“They were already waiting here long before you arrived.”
“D-don’t tell me…”
“Didn’t you find it strange? That I just happened to choose the perfect day and the perfect location for an ambush?”
Every piece of information about me had been deliberately leaked. The Black Bears were the Count’s dirty blade—a bandit organization. And there was no group easier to plant traitors inside than a bandit group.
“What I’m about to do isn’t negotiation. It’s a one-sided massacre. Elina.”
“Yes, young master.”
“Begin.”
“Understood.”
The moment I gave the order, Elina drew two daggers from her thigh. Crimson eyes and red magic power surged from her body. She became a bolt of lightning—slitting the nearest bandit’s throat in the blink of an eye. That was the beginning.
Slash—! Slice!
“Stop them! Stop those bastards!!”
“I-I can’t even see them! Boss!!”
Whoosh! Stab—!
“Keuk!”
“Goddammit!!”
The flaming arrows had forced them to light fires, turning them into easy targets. They couldn’t respond to the ninja unit striking from the darkness. And the ninjas weren’t the only threat they faced.
There was also my lovely beast, Elina.
Slice—! Slice—! Slaaaash—!
“H-how can she be this fast?!”
“She’s at least twice as fast as the intel said!”
The supposedly skilled fighters tried to block her, but it was obvious they were reacting to the false information we had planted. While the battlefield was being cleaned up, I walked toward the Count. He still hadn’t processed the sudden reversal.
“H-how… Kill him! Kill Kyle right now!”
This idiot still hadn’t grasped the situation.
I stepped closer.
“You come all this way and still only rely on others?”
“What?”
“If you’re a leader—if you’re a Count—shouldn’t you at least have the decency to fight your own battles?”
“You… you bastard! Kyle!!”
Magic power gathered at the tip of the Count’s staff. He swung it toward me and screamed.
Fireball
A fireball the size of a soccer ball shot toward me. As expected of a 3-Circle mage, it was decent. But it was nowhere near enough.
Bwoong—
Whoosh!
The Count’s fireball slammed into the blue hexagonal barrier surrounding me and vanished without a trace.
Seeing the shield that protected me, the Count cried out in shock.
“Th-that’s—?! 5-Circle magic, Shield… Don’t tell me you’re a 5-Circle mage?!”
“That can’t be. I have no talent for magic.”
This was a world of magic, swords, and skills, yet sadly I possessed no magical talent. At best I could manage the most basic 1-Circle spells. I had no ability to cast 5-Circle Shield. The Count was so stunned he couldn’t close his mouth.
“Then how… Could it be—?”
“Yes. Exactly that.”
I showed him the blue brooch pinned to my chest. The first-class artifact Edelweiss’s Heart. Blue light poured from the brooch, maintaining the Shield around me.
There was a famous bat-themed hero in my previous life who once said: “What is your superpower?” “I’m rich.”
I was the same. My magical and physical talents were perfectly average. But I had money. A great deal of money. And with that money I had reinforced myself.
There was no iron suit in this world, but there were things that served the same purpose—artifacts infused with magic power. I had bought every powerful but overpriced or inefficient artifact that had been gathering dust in warehouses, and I had invested in the mages who created them. In other words, I had become this:
“I am Artifact Man.”
“Ar… Artifact Man?”
“Never mind. It was just a dad joke.”
I pulled a gun from my coat. My specially commissioned personal artifact—the Gold Revolver. It was a magic firearm that used specially crafted magic bullets, an artifact capable of storing spells inside its ammunition.
The spell currently loaded was 4-Circle magic: Auto Arrow, a homing arrow spell. Each bullet cost a staggering eleven million zenons. I aimed the revolver at the Count’s head.
“Farewell, Count.”
“W-wait! I—!”
Click!
A streak of white light tore through the darkness.
The trigger clicked. Instead of gunpowder, magic power exploded from the barrel, launching a white arrow of light. It flew like a laser, piercing straight through the Count’s head with surgical precision.
That day, in the forests of the Eastern Region, Count Purcus Rosenberg disappeared. His body was never found. The only rumor that spread was that he had been eaten by bears.