I Am Not a Third-Rate Villain Who Gives His Enemies a Chance
I was once shocked by three specific scenes while reading my girlfriend’s romance fantasy novel in my previous life. One of them was the sudden appearance of ninjas.
The heroine, Mariel, would find herself in danger, only to be rescued by a clan that had migrated from an Eastern country to Outerloon. They were supposedly hired by the imperial prince.
“Hey… babe?”
“What?”
“Why are there suddenly ninjas in a romance fantasy?”
No matter how you looked at it, ninjas felt completely out of place in a romance fantasy. Curious about why they had appeared, I asked my girlfriend and received this answer.
“Because they’re cool.”
“…Well, if that’s the reason, I guess there’s nothing to be done.”
If they were added simply because they looked cool, then there really was no helping it.
After I was possessed, I came to Outerloon to recruit them. I sought out their leader, Saito, and offered him an enormous sum to become my personal guards.
“You dare try to buy our clan with money?!”
Yes. I was trying to buy them with money.
When they refused, I presented an overwhelming amount of compensation and benefits. A monthly salary of 600,000 zenons (roughly six million won), separate holiday pay, performance incentives, comprehensive welfare including maternity leave, and even housing benefits.
After hearing my conditions, they eventually took my hand and became my direct guards, protecting me from within the shadows.
The five ninjas who suddenly sprang from the shadows and surrounded me left Helchen’s lackeys frozen in place, unable to approach.
“What the hell are you doing?!”
“Y-Young master, those guys… they don’t look ordinary.”
“So what if they’re not ordinary? Are you just going to stand here and die? Remember, now that we’ve come this far, none of you can go back alive.”
At Helchen’s words, the lackeys’ eyes changed. It seemed they had resolved to risk their lives. They drew weapons resembling swords and assumed combat stances.
They really weren’t ordinary.
The ninja squad was also preparing to engage them when Elina stepped forward.
“Everyone, please protect the young master. I will take care of them.”
Elina drew two daggers she had hidden on her thigh.
I quickly shouted.
“Elina!”
“Yes, young master.”
“You can kill anyone who resists.”
“…Understood.”
I had given the order to kill them all. There was no way I could let our Elina get hurt just because we tried to half-heartedly spare them.
“Forget capturing them alive! Kill them all!”
“Yes!”
At Helchen’s command, the muscular thugs charged forward. As expected of the subordinates he trusted, they were no pushovers. Their running form, the way they gripped their swords—everything showed they were properly trained soldiers.
But there was one thing they didn’t know.
If they were above average, then Elina was off the charts.
Swish—!
“Gaaahk!!”
Elina charged at a speed too fast for the eye to follow and sliced off the head of the man at the front. The absurd acceleration made even those following behind realize she was no ordinary opponent.
But it was already too late.
“You bitch! You’re not normal—Gaaahk!!!”
Swish—!
“Just cover—Guhk!”
Slaaash—!
“This… this fast…”
Slice—!
In the dark back alley, Elina moved with blinding speed while radiating red magic power. She looked more like a ninja than the actual ninjas.
In an instant, most of Helchen’s guards had their throats slit by Elina and collapsed on the spot. The one who seemed the most skilled barely survived, gasping for breath on the ground.
The battle-hardened warrior looked at Elina, whose red eyes glowed with crimson magic, and spoke.
“I’ve heard the rumors… There was an experiment that tried to transplant beastkin magic circuits into humans… So you’re a ‘Survivor.’”
“…I am simply the young master’s maid.”
Swish—!
With that final slash, the last of Helchen’s subordinates died. No matter how many times I saw it, Elina’s skill was truly no joke.
The ninjas who had been watching Elina’s prowess alongside me muttered among themselves.
“Boss… didn’t we not even need to come out?”
“Shh! We still have to earn our pay, don’t we…”
“That’s true.”
It seemed the ninjas felt awkward because Elina had gone full one-woman army. Well… if I were them, I’d feel the same.
After cleaning up all the subordinates, Elina turned her gaze toward Helchen.
Stare!
“Hiiik?!”
Terrified, Helchen tried to run away. I signaled the ninjas, and they instantly dashed to the entrance of the alley, blocking his escape route.
Yes. At least earn your pay somehow.
“D-Don’t come near me! Stay away from me!!”
Swish—!
“Aaaaaagh!!”
With his path blocked, Helchen wildly swung a razor at Elina. She flashed her red eyes and cleanly severed his right wrist.
Oof. That must hurt.
With his hand cut off, Helchen collapsed on the spot. Once everything was settled, I approached him.
He clutched his bleeding wrist, trembling in fear as he looked up at me.
“K-Kyle… You know I was just joking earlier, right?”
Helchen’s noble silver hair was stained with red blood, and his face was twisted in terror. But given how much sin he had accumulated, I didn’t feel much pity.
The only thing I felt toward him right now was one thing.
How can I squeeze the most money out of this guy in a way that’ll become legendary?
That was it.
“Shall we start calculating now, Helchen?”
“N-No! Please no!!!!”
Helchen was dragged deeper into the dark alleys of Outerloon.
Thanks to Helchen, all the ingredients were ready.
It was time to cook.
The Jev family had grown wealthy through northern mining, including Bluestone. Perhaps that was why their mansion featured a striking roof made of blue bricks, as if commemorating their success with the very resource that built their fortune.
In the study of that mansion, Tyrun, the guild master of the Jev Guild, sat facing Kyle, the vice-master of the Lorend Guild.
The conversation between them was anything but pleasant.
“I’ll think about it after I cut off all your fingers first.”
In front of Helchen floated a recording crystal that displayed the events from yesterday in Outerloon. It captured Helchen’s threats and attack, followed by Elina’s counterattack. The footage ended with the scene of all Helchen’s subordinates dying, and a heavy silence fell over the study.
Tyrun barely managed to find his voice.
“Is… my son still alive?”
“Who knows? That will likely depend on how you respond, Master Tyrun.”
Imperial law permitted duels. However, the challenger had to be prepared to die. Since there was clear evidence that Helchen had attacked me, killing him would not be illegal in the slightest.
At my words, Tyrun asked,
“What do you want?”
“Everything the Jev Guild possesses.”
“We have already surrendered. Is there any need to go this far?”
“Ah, I didn’t want to go this far either. But since Helchen chose to act this way, I have no choice.”
I really had wanted to end things here, but that idiot Helchen just had to cause trouble.
Tyrun’s expression hardened. He glared at me and said,
“There’s no need to put on an act for me. This was all part of your plan from the beginning, wasn’t it?”
…As expected. Even if Helchen was a fool, this man was no ordinary person. That must be how he managed to run the guild this far despite having an idiot like Helchen for a son.
I dropped the act.
“…I am not a third-rate villain who gives his enemies a chance only to get stabbed in the back.”
Although I had seized the opportunity well this time and defeated the Jev Guild, the world was long and the future uncertain. I refused to be the kind of villain who gave the protagonist a chance and ended up getting betrayed later.
When I acted, I destroyed my enemies thoroughly and took everything I could. I was a merchant, after all.
Especially since Tyrun of the Jev Guild was far too capable to be left alive.
“I see…”
“I hear the southern region of Mild is quite peaceful… I hope you understand that this is the last chance I can offer you.”
This was the absolute bottom line I could give.
At my words, Tyrun quietly nodded.
“Very well. I will accept all your conditions. So please… spare my son…”
Seeing Tyrun’s desperate expression, I smiled.
“How could I kill a friend? Helchen is alive, so please don’t worry.”
Only then did Tyrun let out a sigh of relief.
Hmm… He did lose one hand, but that was his own fault, so I hope he understands.
After that, things moved quickly.
Everything belonging to the Jev Guild was transferred to the Lorend Guild. On the surface, it was presented as the Lorend Guild acquiring the Jev Guild, but in reality, the price had been so absurdly low it was practically free. Everyone realized something had happened between the two guilds.
However, no nobles dared side with the Jev Guild in their conflict against the Lorend Guild, which had ties to the imperial princess and the north, while the Jev Guild was connected to the purged imperial prince.
The Jev family liquidated all their assets and departed for the southern part of the empire. Once a family that had nearly monopolized northern minerals and ruled the capital, their end— like that of all defeated parties—was utterly miserable.
And I…
“Elina, ah—”
“Here you are, young master.”
I was relaxing on the terrace of the Jev family mansion with Elina for the first time in a while. As I lay there sunbathing and opened my mouth, Elina fed me an apple she had carved into the shape of a rabbit.
Mmm~ Delicious.
I chewed it with great satisfaction.
“Is it because Elina cut it? The apples taste especially sweet today.”
“I searched every orchard in the Eastern Region and carefully selected only the best. I’m glad they please you.”
“Y-You went that far?”
“Yes. Because they are apples for you, young master.”
I was happy she did it for me, but she really didn’t have to go that far…
Anyway, the Jev Guild’s assets naturally included the Jev family mansion. I had used this opportunity to become independent from my family. Of course, I left as a proper adult seeking independence. It was absolutely not because I wanted to play around freely without my parents watching.
As I gazed at the blue Jev family mansion—which was now my house—and pondered how to enjoy myself, Elina, who had received a telegram, spoke.
“Young master… it seems the ‘Poison Apple’ has begun to move.”
“Oh?”
Our little lucky charm. The romance fantasy heroine and walking nuclear bomb, Mariel, had started moving?
Come to think of it, it was about time for the next part of the story to begin.
“It’s time to start moving. Elina, let’s prepare.”
“Yes, young master.”
I stood up from the terrace and stretched. If there was one thing I had realized since coming here, it was that the most fun thing in the world was making money.