The Hero Who Doesn't Want to Be a Hero
That day was nothing special. I was just in my room playing a mobile defense game full of heroes and villains.
"What the hell? Why is the enemies' attack power so absurdly high...? And every hero skill has these ridiculous activation conditions..."
The difficulty was brutal, so I specially dropped 19,900 won on a charge.
I pulled one single overpowered cash-shop unit with the Invincible trait. That was all.
"Yeah, now the game's finally playable. Time to melt this stupidly tanky boss in seconds—"
Thud.
And just like that, I got isekai'd straight into that goddamn game.
Roughly forty years ago, things people called special abilities—or superpowers—began to awaken.
"Waaaah! Fire's shooting out of my hands?!"
Whoosh—!
"Kyaaah—! M-my neck just stretched out all of a sudden—!"
Squelch!
Taking advantage of the chaos, some ability-users with rotten hearts started using their powers exactly like the villains in the movies, committing every kind of heinous crime and throwing the world into turmoil.
"Gahahaha! Hey there, missy, that ass of yours looks real juicy! Stuff this bag full of cash, then you're coming with me!"
"Hic...! P-please, somebody help—"
Slap!
"Keh-heh-heh! You dumb broad, I'm a reinforced human who can bend tank barrels with my bare hands! Even if the army shows up they can't stop me, so be a good girl and stay quiet while I'm still asking nicely!"
But whenever the world sinks into deep darkness, a sun always rises to drive the night away—
KWA-AAAANG—!
"Hieeeek—! I-it's Smile! Boss...!! Smile just showed up!"
"Guh-haaack!!! W-why the hell is that maniac in Incheon?! Isn't his jurisdiction Seoul?!"
"...Reinforced human Strong. I am placing you under arrest for bank robbery, sexual assault, and assault of civilians."
Now the world had countless government-certified heroes—professionally trained by official agencies—who fought day and night to stop the villains' vicious, underhanded crimes.
KUUUUUNG—!!
"Gyaaaaah! My arm! My arm that even a cannon couldn't break—!!"
"Is anyone hurt, citizen?"
"Y-yes...! Um, if it's all right, maybe I could treat you to a cup of coffee as thanks..."
Grin—.
"Haha! No need. That smile of yours is the greatest reward I could ask for."
"Keh! Y-yes! Th-then I'll keep smiling! From now on I'll smile ten times a day in Smile-nim's direction!"
"Hahaha! You're quite the comedian, aren't you?"
And among all those heroes today, the most iconic figure of all was the tall, handsome black-haired man standing right there.
Born during the "Age of Chaos" when villains abusing their powers were rapidly tearing the world apart, he had begun hero work at the mere age of fifteen. Now thirty, he had almost single-handedly ushered in the present "Age of Stability," dedicating half his life to securing peace in Korea.
The invincible hero of the previous generation and the strongest of the current one.
Known for never losing his smile toward the citizens no matter what hardship or adversity he faced—hence the alias.
Korea's—no, the world's—greatest hero: Smile.
Click—.
"Ugh...! I'm seriously gonna die of sleep deprivation...! What absolute moron invented this insane penalty that squeezes my heart if I don't work eighteen hours a day...!"
A "Hero" always concerns himself with others' crises rather than his own comfort. And a "Hero" never utters such vulgar language.
Squeeze—!
"Urgh! Fine, I get it, I get it! But even a hero should get one day off a year, right?!"
Clutching my constricting heart, I glared daggers at that damn status window from inside my cramped goshiwon room—less than two meters long, where I smacked my head every time I stood up.
For the record, the reason Korea's greatest hero slept in a tiny goshiwon with a shared bathroom outside was simple.
...Currently I was an unemployed "basic livelihood recipient" receiving 600,000 won a month in housing and medical support from the government.
Sure, a hero with no inheritance or side job ending up poor was classic cliché material. But in this day and age, when "hero" was treated as a profession more glamorous than any celebrity or sports star, the fact that I worked seven days a week, eighteen hours a day, and was still on basic welfare felt like a genuine middle finger from the universe.
Of course I had plenty of rich fans who went beyond offering me a place to live—begging me to please accept a whole mansion as a gift—but every single time that damned status window would...
A "Hero" does not accept monetary compensation for his activities. The only reward a "Hero" may receive is the smiles of the citizens.
...spout that garbage and crush my heart with penalties, so I had no choice but to refuse every offer with tears in my eyes.
...And every time, people would gush about Smile's noble spirit, claiming that modern heroes who turned the job into a profession and raked in hundreds of millions were all fakes, then shed their own tears while praising me to the heavens.
...Seriously, one time a famous idol came on a popular TV show as a panelist and loudly bashed the half-celebrity heroes of today, declaring that only Smile was a true hero in the original sense. My heart nearly stopped from the sheer secondhand embarrassment.
I already caught quiet side-eye from some heroes my age for doing this dangerous work for free. Why did some idol who also made a living off popularity have to hold heroes to such an impossible standard and put me on a pedestal like that?
That excessive kindness almost brought real tears to my eyes.
Of course, every time it did—
A Hero does not cry. A Hero's spirit must always be harder than steel.
—that status window would crush my heart again, so I couldn't even cry for real.
"Damn it, if I could just take the money I'd work properly for pay like everyone else...!"
So I glared once more at that insane status window that was already starting to gently squeeze my heart just for one little complaint.
...It wouldn't change anything, but it made me feel a tiny bit better.
Grind... How much longer do I have to live like this? What the hell even is that damn "Condition"...!
Ding—!
Held Ability:Invincible Hero
Effect:Negates all damage. You are the strongest hero.
Penalty:Unheroic actions are completely forbidden. Until the "Condition" is fulfilled, you can never retire.
For the record, the mobile game I was playing before dropping into this world never had such a bizarre penalty. The "Invincible" hero I pulled was a broken unit with zero drawbacks other than the fact you had to whale to get it.
I could only guess that the original units' penalties—"double physical damage taken," "triple skill cooldown," "1.5× damage from ice," and so on—had been twisted into something that fit this reality as a side effect.
Maybe the unit's only real flaw—that the player had to make a "sacrifice" of real money to protect the in-game city—had been warped into this miserable form?
...Whatever. Raking my fingers roughly through my hair didn't change the fact that today, like every day, there was nothing I could do about it.
The rectangular status window that only I could see—whether it was a privilege or a curse of my isekai—spent every day nitpicking that this was wrong and that was forbidden, yet never once told me the important information I actually needed.
"Haa.... Screw it. Might as well sleep. I'll have to deploy again the second I close my eyes anyway..."
Fifteen years after being dropped into this world, still forced to do unpaid hero work protecting the citizens, I had half given up on ever retiring from this cursed job. I just wanted to use whatever tiny scrap of free time I had to rest my eyes, so I lay down on the narrow bed.
Riiing—. Riiing—.
"...Damn it, another call? I'm a human being too, you know! Just let me sleep in peace for once! How urgent is it that they're calling instead of texting?!"
I shot upright.
"Yes, this is Hero Smile. I will deploy immediately. Please give me the villains' location—"
"Ah! Do Hyul! It's been a while. This is Jeong Hak-hyeon! Still living life in the fast lane, I see!"
But the voice coming through the outdated flip phone that no longer matched the times belonged to someone else entirely.
"The reason I'm calling is that we have some truly outstanding new students this year. I know you're swamped, but as a first-generation graduate, if you could spare even a little time to give the entrance speech for your juniors..."
"I'm sorry. As I always say, the safety and peace of the citizens come first for me. Please ask one of the other excellent hero colleagues—"
Ding—!
Retirement Condition Unlocked
Discover the next generation's "True Hero" who will succeed you. Once you do, free retirement without the ability's penalty will become possible.
...What? Did it just say retirement...?
Beep-beep—.
"Hmm? Do Hyul, can you hear me? The signal must be bad. I keep telling you, even the old folks have stopped using those ancient smartphones. It's about time you upgraded..."
The cheerful voice of my far-senior hero—long retired and living the good life teaching kids, a life I envied so hard it hurt—continued in the background.
I can actually... actually retire from this miserable life...?
"Really, you should switch to a wearable phone already. They're not even expensive these days, and if you need help I can cover it. Stop being so stubborn..."
"...Come to think of it, checking on how well the juniors are growing might be just as important as hero work itself. Very well. This year I'll somehow make time, even if only briefly."
Click.
"Oh! Really?! Excellent decision! Then I'll adjust the speech schedule—just text me whatever times and dates work for you... Hmm? The signal died again?"
Beeeeep—. Beeeeep—.
Keh-heh-heh! Finally...! I finally know the Condition...! Hoo! From now on I'm retiring no matter what! I'll quit this disgusting unpaid hero life as soon as humanly possible...!