Chapter 45
"Th-that’s not it.... That’s a distorted version of the story..."
A green-haired young lady had approached Geom Mujin’s table so quietly he hadn’t even noticed, and now she was speaking up.
"What?"
"B-burgers weren’t invented like that..."
She’d suddenly barged into Great Swordmaster’s TMI session, and now what was this supposed to mean?
"W-well, during the Yuan Dynasty, the Mongol army did crush meat and eat it that way, but that didn’t lead to the hamburger. The origin.... is different..."
That couldn’t be right.
It had been before his transmigration, sure, so it was a pretty old memory, but he’d gotten the information from a source he could trust at the time. (YouTube)
"Then what are you saying?"
Now genuinely curious, he asked.
He had no idea who this young lady was, but since she’d come all the way over like this, she’d probably answer if he asked.
"A-a man named Hambugi, who loved poker so much that he wanted to save time eating meals and play instead, invented the hamburger..."
Meals that began with appetizers, moved through the main dish, and finished with dessert took far too much time.
Hambugi, who liked poker more than his three meals a day.
-Severe poker addiction.
-Hah. And what right do you have to speak of addiction? If you’re so eager to talk, then prove it with poker.
Wasting even meal time felt unbearable to him, so he invented the culinary genius of sandwiching food between bread and eating it that way.
"Huh?"
At her explanation, Geom Mujin tilted his head.
He felt like he’d heard something similar before.
If his memory was right, that story was supposed to be the origin of the sandwich, not the hamburger.
And wasn’t that guy Hambugi or whatever actually the Earl of Sandwich?
"Excuse me, young lady. What you’re talking about is the origin of the sandwich, isn’t it?"
"N-no, it’s not.... People who felt burdened by the hamburger’s heaviness refined it into something lighter, and that became the sandwich..."
"R-right?"
At the girl’s explanation, Geom Mujin simply shut his mouth.
Trying to discuss authenticity in a ridiculous world where hamburgers and sandwiches came out of ancient China was, in itself, stupid.
Without realizing it, I rolled my eyes and looked the other person over from head to toe.
It was something of a habit I’d picked up from life in the martial world.
The young lady I checked out had an impression both similar to and different from our party’s little one.
Whereas Little Mung was more on the exhausted-looking side, this young lady was downright gloomy.
The long bangs hanging over her face cast it in shadow, which made that even more obvious.
Add a slightly bent back and hunched shoulders, and the whole picture was a perfect holy trinity of shrinking violets.
In other words, she looked timid and gloomy overall.
But unlike her attitude, her chest was moving boldly in front.
Flop.
Because she leaned forward, her chest stood out even more.
"Ahem."
I casually looked away and cleared my throat.
But those eyes of his, endowed with vision beyond humanity itself, didn’t miss that fleeting spectacle.
...That’s above first place in the world of tiddies.
Her imposing bust rivaled, or perhaps surpassed, the wisdom of the Murong clan’s ancestors.
He hadn’t inspected it firsthand, but it was obvious.
"...Monster titties."
Sensing the oppressive force of the young lady’s transcendence-rank chest barricade, the kid muttered under his breath without thinking.
"S-so the theory that hamburgers originated with the Mongol army is a rumor.... H-huh!?"
At that, the young lady let out a strangled yelp and hurriedly covered her chest with both arms.
Boing—
The premium barricade crushed beneath both arms produced a sound effect straight out of pudding or jelly.
"M-monster titties, you say..."
"Y-you punk!"
Startled by the kid’s sudden outburst, Geom Mujin warned him.
"Don’t just go blabbing the truth like that..."
"The truth!?"
"N-no, that’s not what I meant. You can’t tease adults like that. Tsk!"
"......"
At Geom Mujin’s warning, the kid’s eyebrows drooped a little.
"Sorry. He’s still young..."
"Uuugh..."
And then, having had her complex hit dead center, the young lady’s mouth started to sag just as much.
"Ah, ah! Anyway, young lady, you came here to say that, right?"
Seeing that, I hurriedly changed the subject.
If she started crying here, things would get awkward fast.
Breaking news! One of the Seven Martial Stars, Great Swordmaster, sexually harasses a young lady in a tavern!?
The barbarian swordsman finally shows his true colors!
Great Swordmaster desperately claims it was all the kid’s doing, not his!
Breaking news! Upon hearing this, Plum Sword Beauty confronts Great Swordmaster! Ground zero declared!
Just imagining it made me dizzy.
"W-well.... actually..."
Fortunately, my intent worked.
The green-haired young lady, regaining her composure, twisted around nervously and spoke with care.
No, “spoke” was generous; “muttered” was probably more accurate, since her voice kept sinking lower and lower.
"What is it?"
At his urging, she glanced at the table and then slowly extended a finger.
"I-if it’s not too rude, may I take a look at that for a moment...?"
She must have been terribly tense, because her voice cracked a little at the end.
"That Great Swordmaster somersault?"
What she was pointing at was me, balancing drinks on top of my head with a maddeningly perfect sense of center of gravity.
"Y-yes! I’ll even pay compensation..."
"No, there’s no need for that. Is that okay with you?"
"...Yeah."
When Geom Mujin asked, the kid looked less than thrilled to show it to the tiddies monster—no, the young lady—but still nodded.
"Here you go."
"Th-thank you..."
The young lady took the toy with both hands, her eyes shining.
"Amazing..."
"Heh...."
"Just as expected...."
She examined the Great Swordmaster somersault from every angle, marveling over and over.
I started to feel even more embarrassed on the thing’s behalf.
"Is it really that impressive?"
Honestly, I wanted to smash the damn thing right then and there.
"O-of course it is...!"
At Geom Mujin’s question, the girl whipped her head around.
She leaned her face close to Geom Mujin’s.
His face reflected in her round pupils.
Then she moved her tiny cherry-like lips at lightning speed.
Tap-tap-tap!
"T-this Seven Martial Stars series is based on the Seven Martial Stars back when they were still rising masters before they became the Seven Martial Stars."
What? Wait, this wasn’t the first time?
Just how much money were these bastards milking out of this thing?
"And that applies to this Great Swordmaster somersault too."
The young lady pointed to the waist of the toy.
"This black sword here is the Ghost Soul Sword, the one Great Swordmaster used when he first began making a name for himself suppressing demons, and the recreation is incredibly accurate..."
At the waist of the Great Swordmaster somersault hung a sword engraved with a hideous goblin on its guard.
"He only used it for a short time, but that just made it a premium item among people in the business..."
Ah, the Ghost Soul Sword.
Of course I knew it.
Just as the young lady said, it was a sword I obtained when I first began my campaign to butcher the demon faction.
“Obtained” was the right word, because it hadn’t originally belonged to me.
Its original owner had been the evil sect master known as the Ghost Slaughter Swordman.
Despite his title, he hunted people rather than ghosts, and I remembered him as one seriously insane bastard.
The man carried a demonic sword said to be inhabited by a ghost’s soul— the Ghost Soul Sword— and if anyone even brushed against it by accident, he’d cut them down on the spot.
At first glance, he seemed like some creep obsessed with his sword, but that wasn’t all he did. He killed people all the same.
Time to feed our Ghost Soul Sword.
Aaaagh!
He would randomly decide mornings, afternoons, or evenings as “meal time” and slaughter someone so the sword could feast on blood and flesh.
Honestly, only eating one meal a day might have been a relief.
While ordinary folks trembled in fear before the Ghost Slaughter Swordman, never knowing when or where he’d unleash a meal-time massacre, black hair came for him.
Oh? That sword of yours looks pretty slick. Hand it over.
The duel between the two didn’t even last ten exchanges before the Ghost Slaughter Swordman’s right arm was cut off and it was over.
What? You’re this weak? Isn’t there some hidden ability sealed inside the sword or something?
Geom Mujin’s opponent, the Ghost Slaughter Swordman, wasn’t nearly as strong as his reputation suggested.
In fact, he was weak enough to be embarrassing.
Hey, don’t joke around! Hurry up and use sword aura!
...I don’t know how to do that kind of thing. Hrk...
Shockingly, he was merely a Peak expert who didn’t even know how to use sword aura.
He had inflated his middling skill with the terror and madness of indiscriminate murder.
And just as his owner was all bluster and hot air, the Ghost Soul Sword—despite rumors that it became sharper when fed human blood—was obviously pure hogwash too.
He had simply gone to a blacksmith, had him make a sword that looked impressive, and then silenced the man afterward.
Argh, damn it! I should just—ugh...
He had originally meant to cut the craftsman down along with the fraud, but since the sword itself looked so convincing, he’d carried it off as a trophy for a time.
So there really was someone who remembered that.
He hadn’t carried it around for all that long either.
"Because the Ghost Soul Sword was drinking too much blood during the demon-suppression campaign, its ghostly soul was about to awaken, so Great Swordmaster sealed it deep in his hometown in the heart of Baekdu Mountain..."
"That’s not it."
"Huh?"
"I just threw it away because it got rusty."
The Ghost Slaughter Swordman used cheaper metal than I thought.
And a seal in Baekdu Mountain? What was that nonsense?
I’ve never even been there.
"......"
"Ah."
At the silent stare fixed on him, I realized my mistake.
I’d just said something so absurd that I’d blurted it out without thinking.
"H-how do you even know that, Great Hero...?"
In a dark chamber.
"......"
In the middle of the room, a man wearing a faceless mask sat in a cross-legged posture.
Several lamps were arranged before him, but none of them had been lit.
How long had he sat there alone in that darkness?
Fwoosh—
One by one, flames sprang to life in the wicks of the lamps.
But those flames were not orange; they burned an indigo blue.
The indigo light only seemed to make the surrounding darkness deeper.
"So I was the last one, then."
As the lamp flames flickered, voices drifted out.
"I’m busy, so hurry this up~ My body can’t get cold, you know."
"Oho, long time no see, everyone!"
"Was that person unable to come?"
"That person is busy preparing for the grand plan, so I’m here in their place."
The voices each said their piece, and when the central lamp spoke, the surrounding lamps all fell silent at once.
"......"
"......"
"The reason I gathered you here today is because there’s something you need to know."
"What is it?"
The man asked.
"Recently, the rat I planted in Jiangxi Province died. And the 'tiger' it was supposed to swallow naturally didn’t get swallowed either."
"What!?"
"Why!?"
"What happened...?"
"What did you say?"
The lamps flickered in surprise, but the man was the most shocked of all.
He had been the one who’d run himself ragged the most for the Jiangxi Province operation.
For that “tiger” not to have been swallowed and then for the rat to die—how could he not be astonished?
"Could the Martial Alliance have found out? No way those guys are that competent."
"We’re currently verifying the truth of it, but it seems the Seven Martial Stars got involved."
At the word Seven Martial Stars, the lamps flickered violently.
"Fuck!"
"Bastards!"
"Those idiots are always off playing immortals."
To them, the Seven Martial Stars were like the dragon’s reverse scale.
"If those bastards really caught the scent, this is going to be a pain. Since you had the most contact with Jiangxi Province, Sama Ryeong, you handle the check."
"...Understood."
With that order from the central lamp, the man’s expression soured.
A simple “go check” may have sounded easy, but that one task included every kind of chore imaginable.
And he was already busy enough with things here...
"Also, Sama Ryeong, the pace of operations in Hubei Province has displeased that person. Produce results as soon as possible."
"...Didn’t I just say I understood? I’m telling you, Ilma Ryeong."
He had only one body, but two urgent jobs to deal with.
At Ilma Ryeong’s not-quite-reproach, snickering laughter rose from the other lamps.
Those damned bastards.
"As you all heard, the Seven Martial Stars may be on the move. Be even more careful not to leave a trail, and remain faithful to your current assignments."
"Understood."
"Don’t worry."
"Then today’s meeting is adjourned."
"Revive the Divine Cult, annihilate the martial world, and bring forth the divine demon!"
"Revive the Divine Cult, annihilate the martial world, and bring forth the divine demon!"
"Offer everything you have to the sacred flame."
With those words, the flames in the lamps vanished.
"Hoo.... Damned bastards."
With no good news at all coming from the gathering, the man let out a sigh.
His head hurt just thinking about all the work still ahead, but at least one thing could be considered fortunate: progress had finally been made on one of their recent tasks.
He examined the letter that had arrived from the old dog.
Baekdu Cheongak-eung capture successful.
"I’ll have to go to Wuhan."
After reading the letter, the man—Sama Ryeong—rose from his seat, steadying the faceless mask beside him with one hand.
He’d finish things here first, then head straight to Jiangxi Province.