Return My Wife
Celia murmured it under her breath, eyes fixed on the door he had just closed.
"...Yeah. Of course you would."
Leon's reaction had been the only reasonable one. Zenith, the next head of the family, had come in person to take Iris away, and in the end Iris herself had said she would go. The two of them weren't even officially anything to each other. There was no reason for Leon to suddenly march all the way to House Meyrud.
She knew that. She knew, and yet.
"...Still. Ending it like that just feels a little sad."
The day Iris left kept rising up whether Celia wanted it to or not. Even with her cheek swollen red, she had pretended she was fine. Anyone could see she had a hundred things left to say, and still she had only nodded, as if none of it touched her.
...There was no way she had been fine.
So when Leon came back, Celia had hoped — just a little. That he would ask why they had taken her like that. That he would get angry. That he would at least say he'd go find her later.
I was taught you don't go sticking your nose into other people's family business.
It was such a perfectly reasonable answer she couldn't even argue with it.
"...What was I even hoping for."
Celia let out a hollow laugh. The two of them had only known each other for a handful of days. Getting worked up all by herself was just embarrassing.
"...I should just get back to the work I've been putting off."
The moment she turned toward her desk—
BAM—!
"Kyaah!"
The door slammed open hard enough to take the wall with it. Celia spun around, startled — and there stood Leon. The same Leon she had just sent out.
"Boss."
"W-what is it all of a sudden?"
"Tell me where Iris lives."
Celia looked at him for a moment.
"...Why the sudden change? Did something happen?"
"There was a letter in my room. I think Iris left it before she went."
"A letter?"
"Yes. Cookies, too."
"Cookies..."
Ah. Two hours. So that was why Iris had insisted Zenith give her time right before she left.
Which meant Iris really had...
"...So. You're going to go find her right now?"
"Yes."
"And do what, exactly?"
Leon closed his mouth for a beat.
"I made a mistake last time."
"A mistake?"
"Yes. I figured I should apologize for it."
Celia tilted her head.
"...If that's all, you could just write a letter."
"I was taught that you apologize to someone's face."
He said it, thought for a second, then shrugged.
"And I want to ask her why she didn't want to go so badly. I think I'll feel better once I know."
Celia said nothing.
A moment ago she had been so disappointed she could hardly stand it. Hearing those words now, she felt strangely, unreasonably relieved. And a little envious.
One leftover letter, and a man who had just come back from the Tower was already running out again.
Had anyone ever done that for her...?
...She didn't think so.
...Lucky you, Iris.
But she couldn't just sit there being happy about it.
"So. You're planning to just say that and come back?"
"Well. I've been thinking I might slap that Zenith woman around a bit."
"...Leon. Do you have any idea how strong Zenith is?"
"More or less."
"Not more or less. She's genuinely strong."
The crimson mana that had flooded the training ground the day Iris left was still vivid behind Celia's eyes. Back when they were students, Zenith had been a junior far below her. The Zenith she had met again after all this time had risen to a level where even Celia couldn't easily guarantee a win in a head-on fight.
And it wasn't just Zenith.
"House Meyrud is a magic lineage centuries old. They have family mages besides Zenith, and knights besides those. No matter how much of a genius you are, taking on an entire house by yourself is a completely different problem."
Saying it out loud felt a little strange. Until a moment ago she had been quietly hoping Leon would go after Iris — and now that he actually said he would, here she was, panicking, trying to talk him out of it.
"Can't you just wait a little?"
Her voice softened before she even realized it.
"I don't want to, but I'll try contacting Zenith. We'll find out what's going on first. If there's a real problem, it won't be too late to move then."
Leon was quiet for a moment.
"I thought the same thing until just now. But I don't think I could sleep like this."
Celia couldn't say anything. His tone was the same as always, but today it didn't sound like a joke at all.
"Still..."
"Celia."
"...!"
Leon looked at her.
"I don't want to sit here doing nothing and then think later, I should've gone. I should've at least tried."
"..."
"So."
There was resolve in his voice.
Celia couldn't speak for a while. Telling a guy who talked like that that he couldn't go didn't seem like it would make him give up. If anything, he'd wander around not knowing the way and get lost somewhere completely random.
A sigh escaped her.
"...You really don't listen, do you."
And yet a smile came with it.
"Northeast of the city. Go out the east gate and keep following the main road. When the path splits, take the right."
"...Which way is northeast?"
Celia closed her mouth for a second.
"Haa..."
In the end she pulled a map out of the drawer.
"Forget it. Just look at this."
She traced the route with her finger, one turn at a time, and Leon finally nodded like he understood.
"And when you get there, see Iris first."
Celia added one last thing before folding the map.
"Don't just take Zenith's word for it. Ask Iris yourself whether she actually wants to come back."
"That was the plan."
"And try not to fight if you can help it."
"Yes. I'll do my best."
Leon nodded and stood up.
"Well then. I'll be back, Celia."
"...Yeah. Safe travels."
Celia gave a small wave.
BAM—!
The door closed.
She stared at it for a while, then slowly leaned back in her chair.
"...I'm worried."
She'd told him not to fight Zenith, but with that personality of his, whether he'd actually just talk and come back quietly...
"...Still. I'm glad."
At least it didn't seem like Iris had been the only one who cared.
And she was a little envious. No — quite a lot, actually.
To have someone who would go after you without even looking back.
Iris was lucky. She really was.
"...They do suit each other. They're around the same age, too."
Leon was eighteen. Iris was twenty.
Compared to that, she was...
"...Thirty."
Saying it out loud made it sound even worse.
Celia pouted.
It had only been a joke at first. She'd made him play boyfriend to dodge a matchmaking meeting, they'd drunk together, and they'd ended up in the same bed. Nothing had actually happened, but Leon had gotten the completely wrong idea all by himself, and it had been so funny she just never corrected him.
That should have been the end of it. Somewhere along the way, though, things had started to feel strange.
When he said he'd take responsibility, it had felt good. When he said he liked her, that had felt really good too. Every time he brought up the baby it was absurd and embarrassing — but it wasn't like she hated it, either.
"...What am I even doing."
Celia absently ran a hand over her face.
"...Let's stop. Now."
That was enough. She'd just gotten a little carried away because a younger guy said he liked her. She had never dated anyone in her entire life. She had never liked anyone like this before, either. But she thought she understood what she was feeling now.
I really did like him, didn't I.
"...Yeah."
Then this was a good place to stop. It had been a lie from the start, so ending it here was fine.
"...Ngh..."
A strange sound slipped out of her. She clapped a hand over her mouth, but her eyes had already gone hot, and tears were falling one by one.
Drip. Drip.
"Haha... I didn't even realize I was crying..."
She hadn't thought it was something to cry over. But now that she was actually thinking of it as the end, she was just... so disappointed.
"...For someone like me, it was too much to hope for anyway."
Celia roughly wiped at her eyes.
"...It wasn't bad, though. Still."
The moment she started to turn toward the window—
BAM—!
"Ah! You scared me!!!!"
This time her heart really nearly jumped out of her chest.
"Celia!"
"W-what! Why are you back again!"
"I forgot something."
"What...?"
Leon looked like he had left out something truly, critically important.
"I came up with a few baby names that are absolutely incredible, you know?"
"...What?"
"For a boy and a girl both. It'd take too long to go through them now, so when I get back we can look them over together."
He started to open the door, then went ah and turned his head again.
"And no matter how I think about it, that fucking bitch who ran her mouth about my father-in-law needs at least one punch before I'll feel better, you know?"
"F-father-in-law...?"
"I'll rough her up just enough and come back, so you think of some good baby names too, Celia! Okay, I'm really going this time!!!!!!"
"W-wait. Leon!"
BAM—!
The door slammed shut.
This time the footsteps actually faded into the distance.
Celia stared blankly at the door, then finally burst out laughing.
"...Pfft."
This guy was actually insane.
...Leon. There is no baby. It was all a lie from the beginning.
...It was a lie.
"...I might actually want one now."
Celia covered her burning cheeks with both hands.
"Hmm..."
I ran back through the names I'd been turning over as I left the White Magic Tower.
"If it's a boy, instead of ZzSupremeMagezz, maybe ZzSupremeBlackKnightzz..."
> This string is not suitable as a personal name.
"It's not even my name, so not my problem."
> ......
Well. I could settle it with Celia later.
"For now, Iris first."
I unfolded the map Celia had drawn, checked the direction, and headed out through the east gate.
Once I was outside the city, the route was simpler than I'd expected. Just keep walking along the one big road and take a right at the fork. I figured if I flagged down a carriage somewhere along the way, I'd get there in no time.
A long while later.
"...This is ridiculously far."
No time, my ass.
A few carriages did pass, but every single one was going the other way.
So what was I supposed to do.
"Guess I'll just walk."
Might as well treat it like a leisurely jog.
The first few hours were fine. I'd walked around all day in the Tower, so a flat road didn't seem like much. The problem was that I had just come down after wandering that place for over three days.
My legs hurt like hell. If I closed my eyes I'd be out cold on the spot. Lying down in the middle of the road, though, felt a little...
Anyway, I kept walking.
By the time the sky brightened and the sun climbed high, the feeling in my soles was starting to get weird. I didn't even want to calculate how many more hours I'd have to walk if I turned back now, so I just kept moving, eyes forward.
"Next time, I'm definitely taking a carriage."
I have money. Why am I putting myself through this.
"Why doesn't this other world have Uber?"
> That remark does not fit the historical period.
"Haha. Yeah, I figured."
> ......
"Why aren't you saying anything?"
> Checking recorded user response patterns.
"All of a sudden?"
> User did not refute the statement.
> Unrecorded response pattern.
"..."
ERROR! ERROR! ERROR! ERROR!
"This bastard's broken."
Then, in the distance, a long stretch of wall came into view.
At first I thought it was just another noble estate, but once I crested the hill completely, I revised that a little.
"...That's ridiculously huge."
The wall ran on and on in both directions, and inside it sat several main buildings and annexes. Add in the spires rising at the back and it was less a mansion and more a small castle.
> Destination confirmed.
"Finally made it."
The Pokémon League— I mean, House Meyrud.
"More than that... this place is insanely fancy."
I'd roughly known Iris was a rich family's daughter. The clothes, the way she talked — she'd been dripping nobility from the first time I saw her.
I just hadn't expected this much.
A little more walking brought me to the front gate, where two knights in armor immediately looked my way. These weren't the half-asleep guards you saw at a market entrance. Real knights, starting with the gear.
As I got closer, one of them stepped forward and blocked the path with his spear.
"Halt. State your identity. What business brings you here."
Hmm.
I'd prepared a perfectly normal answer on the way here.
I'm Leon, affiliated with the White Magic Tower. I've come to see Miss Iris Meyrud.
Say that much, flash my ID, and they'd let me in no problem, right?
But standing at the front gate, looking at what was inside, my thinking shifted a little.
Iris was in there.
Iris, who had been slapped by Zenith.
The second I thought about that, the urge to walk in quietly just vanished.
"Get lost."
"...?"
The knight blinked.
"Do you have any idea where you—"
"I said get lost."
I cut him off.
The top floor of House Meyrud's main building.
The family head's office had no shortage of people — maids, attendants, even the knights assigned as guards — but the atmosphere was strangely quiet.
"Tea."
Zenith held out her teacup, and the nearest maid hurried over. The hand pouring the tea was visibly shaking.
"You're going to overflow."
"I-I'm sorry!"
"Why are you shaking like that. Am I going to eat you?"
"N-no, ma'am...!"
She started shaking even harder.
Zenith looked down at the teacup with a face that said she genuinely didn't understand. Watching from across the desk, the head of House Meyrud let out a long sigh.
"...Zenith."
"Yes."
"I heard what you did to Iris."
Zenith lifted her eyes.
"And?"
"...I heard you even slapped her."
"I did. She was being far too insolent."
She thought for a moment, then nodded.
"Why did you do it."
"She kept saying she didn't want to. I meant it as a wake-up call."
Her face said, is that really the problem here.
The family head's expression darkened a little further.
"Zenith. How many times have I told you to stop doing things that way."
"Why?"
Zenith asked it back as if she were the one who found it strange.
"I'm not supposed to do that to Iris?"
"Not just that child. To anyone—"
"That's weird."
This time she cut him off. Zenith set down her teacup and looked at him.
"That's how I was taught, though?"
"..."
She glanced down at her own hands for a moment.
"Didn't I grow up exactly the way Father wanted?"
The family head's mouth closed.
Zenith blinked, as if her father's reaction made even less sense.
"Iris has talent too. Seeing her this time, she's grown far more than I expected."
"...So that's why you brought her here."
"Yes. I thought if I taught her properly for a little while, she could become as strong as I am."
"..."
Once again, he had no answer. He looked at his daughter for a long time, then finally lowered his head, slowly.
That was when it happened.
BAM—!
"W-we're in trouble!"
A knight burst through the door into the office. Zenith turned her head as if it were a nuisance.
"What is it?"
"A-a man is causing a disturbance at the front g—"
BOOOOM—!
Before he could finish, the entire building shuddered under a heavy tremor. The windows rattled, and a faint ripple spread across the surface of the tea in Zenith's cup.
"...What?"
The office, which had been bright just a moment ago, had already gone dark.
At first she thought a storm cloud had rolled in.
It hadn't.
Something black was slowly rising beyond the mansion. Crimson-black flame gathered into a long neck, and then enormous wings unfurled to either side. A body made of fire surged higher than House Meyrud's own spires, and a colossal shadow fell across the entire estate.
One by one, the people in the office lost their words. The knights. The maids. Even the family head rose from his seat and looked out the window.
The teacup in Zenith's hand slowly lowered.
"...A dragon?"
A black dragon lifted its enormous head in the sky above.
And then.