Chapter 67
Chapter 67
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 67
Chapter Title: Political Correctness in the Dungeon
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Suddenly, some guy I’d never seen before shows up in this situation—what the hell?
We’d definitely sealed the dungeon entrance, and cleared out all the players and NPCs inside.
So there’s no way any random human could get into the dungeon right now…
Ah, no!
There was one other way to come straight to my boss room like this!
That method was none other than!
“A human who came through Boss Rush?”
“What’s that supposed to be?”
“Oh, Karian doesn’t know, huh.”
Come to think of it, last time Karian came with the succubus, he only asked about the dungeon’s layout.
We never told him about the Boss Rush we’d come up with back then.
Guess I’ll have to explain it to him later.
Anyway, with the place in background mode—no outsiders allowed—and a challenger barges into my boss room!
It’s like during a parade at an amusement park, the costumed employees taking a quick break backstage, and then some innocent lost kid wanders in. Exactly like that?
So, what the hell do I do with this guy?
Hmm… No matter how I think about it, best to just kick him out quick.
Honestly, even if just one guy saw the current situation, who out there would believe him?
They’d just treat him like he’s crazy for sure.
So, human, sorry about this.
Next time, please use the proper route—
“Big bro Balrak.”
“Little bro Ferguson, what’s up?”
“Didn’t the youngest say he met a dhampir before?”
“Yeah, he did.”
Hearing Ferguson say that, I take a closer look at the guy, and his mana feels a bit unusual.
Holy crap, so this guy’s the half-human, half-vampire dhampir the youngest met?
No way the fourth boss in front of me just rolled right up?!
This is seriously a huge jackpot!
But wait, didn’t the youngest say it was a guy?
From a distance, he’s got this weirdly androgynous pretty boy + pretty girl face, and that husky voice I just heard.
I’m curious about this non-binary existence, so I head over to greet him warmly…
“Ughhh!”
“Hm…?”
“Urk! Bluuuugh!! Grkhh!”
"""………"""
A brief silence follows.
Seeing the dhampir collapsed on the floor, face planted, dry-heaving, I barely manage to regain my grip on my sanity that had flown off somewhere.
What the actual fuck?!
The moment I get close, this dhampir suddenly starts puking—why?!
His condition’s even getting worse in real time.
But that’s that, and this is this!
What an ill-mannered bastard!
Daring to puke the second he lays eyes on someone?!
And watching my boss room get filthy in real time—my long-suppressed Hel-Joseon Confucian dragon starts raging in my heart.
Ahh, and now there’s only one way to tame this mighty beast.
No helping it.
Clap! Clap! Clap!
“Heh heh heh. Live long enough, and you see all kinds of things.”
“B-big bro?!”
“Balrak?!”
Up!
“Huh?! Th-this sensation?!”
As I clap and approach the dhampir crawling on the floor like a maggot, the youngest suddenly goes pale as a ghost and snaps awake.
My sworn brothers are yapping something beside me—what’s their deal?
But that’s not important right now.
So, dhampir! That trashy attitude of yours!!
I’ll fix it for sure!!
***************
I wanted to absolutely wreck this rude punk who puked at the sight of me.
But with only three precious days left, I can’t waste them all on this guy.
So I gave him the express mental reform course, but maybe I went too hard for five hours—kid’s gone completely off the rails.
“So, what’s your name?”
“Hyeeeeek…”
“I said, say your name!!”
“Uh, uheek?!”
He’s even regressed to a baby or something—who knows when he’ll snap out of it.
“I’ve been thinking this for a while, but where the hell did you learn this stuff, Balrak?”
“No need to know! Anyway, we’ve got the basics on this guy, so it’s fine.”
For starters, he’s definitely the half-human, half-vampire dhampir the youngest described, but there’s one correction.
“Youngest, this dhampir’s got chest bindings and all, but she’s just a short-haired girl in pants.”
“Wha?! A g-girl?!”
“You seriously didn’t know?”
“Well… humans all look the same to me…”
“That’s racial discrimination talk, youngest.”
Oh man, the youngest pulling peak racist vibes!
Normally I’d discipline him on the spot, but the youngest is an orc—a race with completely different skin and features from humans.
To Orek’s eyes, humans really might all look alike.
“So the concept of beauty’s different too?”
“As Lord Balrak says, one of the orc aesthetic points is fangs protruding from the mouth.”
“Indeed, I prefer women with big fangs.”
Why do I need to know orc turn-ons?
Anyway, while Karian’s busy adding the ascension system and usage limits to my dungeon, we need to figure out what to do with this dhampir.
After chatting with my bros, we converged on one idea.
“Big bro Balrak. Even if this dhampir came here, honestly, she’s got no role in this dungeon and would just be a hindrance to operations.”
“And big bro. I’ve been betrayed by this dhampir before.”
“Hmm… so it comes to that.”
Honestly, the youngest’s word is the clincher.
Once a traitor, always a traitor—as the saying goes, once they break trust, they’re likely to do it again.
So with trust at 0% down to negative percent, plus puking on sight—this ultimate unlikeable dhampir, I wanna say bye-bye.
But just release this talent placed right in front of the youngest?
She’s got proven potential, and if raised right, even if not on par with Ferguson’s cheaty healing factor or Orek’s double class, she could join the powerhouse lineup.
Plus, ‘you can’t fix people’ doesn’t apply here.
Look at my solid sworn brothers beside me!
Ferguson’s gone from chewable gay to a confident, super polite gentleman.
Orek’s ditched the asshole who shot an arrow on sight for a wise hermit on the mountaintop vibe.
So let’s hear the dhampir’s side properly.
We’ll decide once our brain, Karian, shows up.
Not long after.
Finally, the dhampir comes to.
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We move to the training grounds for a bit and hear out the dhampir.
“So your name’s Kayrel?”
“Y-yes siiiirrrk!”
“And you met the youngest before?”
“Y-yeaaaahk!!!”
“But why’d you betray him then?”
“Th-that’s?!”
Oho, super embarrassed now that her dirty laundry’s out.
But without that, I can’t get the full picture on her.
“So summarize your life story in three lines!”
“R-right now?!”
“I said summarize!”
“Y-yeaaaahk! I’m half-human half-vampire, shunned by all! So I wandered cities hiding! And, and!! And!! Annddd…”
What the hell’s got her so ashamed to say it?
But after mental reform, you can only speak truth out of fear!
So spit it out!
Your final trai—!!!
“I like womeeeen!!!”
I like women~
I like women~
Women…
…
"""……?"""
The dhampir’s face turns beet red, and us brothers are speechless for a moment.
But! That line just connected everything that happened here!
“Hmm, so this is why lesbians are wary and hate men.”
“Y-yes?!”
“Ah, that fits perfectly why the youngest got betrayed too?”
“Big bro mentioned cases like this in PC ideology, and it’s real…”
“The conversation’s going on without me—what the hell?!”
Why’d this dhampir puke seeing us in the boss room?
It all makes sense now.
The chest bindings and androgynous styling fit perfectly too.
And the massive shame just now—I get it.
This is the Middle Ages!
Where outing as gay gets your head smashed legally.
So!
“Dhampir, no worries—we’re PC here.”
“W-wait, that’s not—!”
“Hahaha, so this is the political correctness Big Bro Balrak talked about?”
“Exactly, Bro Ferguson. If Big Bro hadn’t taught us PC ideology, my view of this dhampir would’ve been…”
As we gaze at her with our warm, PC-infused looks, the dhampir’s face goes blank—like her brain’s unraveling the universe’s secrets.
Karian finishes up and enters the training grounds.
“Lord Balrak, I’ve added everything you asked to the dungeon. Time to check the mini-dungeons.”
“Oh! Good work, skeleton merchant!”
“And how’d it go with her?”
“Well, here’s the thing!”
We fill Karian in on what we learned, and his eyes glaze over like the universe is exploding in his head too.
“Uh, um… uh.”
“What do you think, skeleton merchant? Perfect logic, right!”
“Indeed. Pure truth.”
“N-no, not that! The puking when I arrived!!”
“Hahaha! No need to be shy, dhampir. We politically correct folk all get it.”
“That’s not it eiiiither!!!”
Whoa, her face is past red—her whole body’s crimson.
She might faint grabbing her neck, so we hear her out.
“So, you puked because of my mana?”
“Exactly!! I’m fine now that I’ve adjusted, but back then—!”
“Nah~ Even the pure mage skeleton merchant was fine meeting me first. No matter how mana-sensitive, that’s nonsense.”
“GyaAAAAH!!”
Even if I was blasting aura unchecked for those five hours, she’s still spouting bullshit excuses.
Don’t worry, dhampir!
This is a totally PC dungeon with zero discrimination.
As long as you don’t cause trouble, be yourself freely!