Do You Think That'll Work?
Do you think that'll work?
"Hyung! Help me out! Please!"
"Asking for help again?"
"Just help me a little, and I think I can win her heart."
"Haha, my little bro is hopeless! Alright, alright, got it!"
Just looking at the dialogue, it's utterly ordinary. But the reality is...
"What do you mean 'got it,' you crazy bastard!"
It's the deranged act of a brother gone mad over a girl, giving away the nation's resources.
The great Bellos Empire. A vast territory spanning the north and east of the Land Continent. Immense national power, massive underground resources. And ancient ruins popping up everywhere, spitting out artifacts like candy.
"If we're comparing to Earth... it's like infinite oil gushing out, plus superhuman strength? Maybe Saudi Arabia and America rolled into one..."
Vast lands, abundant resources. Even the dangerous monsters in the north are just rare resources before the empire's might.
But in novels like this, the empire decays and weakens the further the story progresses. Why? Because the idiotic second prince falls head over heels for the princess of the western kingdom, the Masel in Kingdom, and gives her everything.
He gives away everything. No resources? I'll send some. Lacking power? I'll lend you mine. At war? I'll join in. From manpower to food aid and beyond.
This one lovesick lunatic lives like he's ready to hand over the entire empire.
"No, if you're in love, use your own power... just defect and play house there. Why give away the whole country? It's not even yours."
If it were just the second prince being dumb, this couldn't happen. Being an idiot isn't a crime, but he's not the one with decision-making authority.
That's why the one I hate most is...
"The first prince, that crazy son of a bitch."
The mentally ill brother who grants every single demand of his fool sibling.
Bellon Bellos, the first prince. The legitimate crown prince, undisputed heir. Handsome, outstanding in martial prowess, and a laundry list of other praises.
But summed up in one sentence: 'This guy's just too soft on his siblings.'
What the hell did the emperor do to deserve kids like this? All his children are good-hearted failures, dooming the empire at breakneck speed.
From the second prince's insane requests to the first princess's spoiled whims.
The younger siblings are love-struck zombies shitting everywhere blindly, while the eldest just chuckles and indulges them all.
The result? The empire slowly crumbles, as you'd expect. Elite forces handed out until they're weak, resources and artifacts squandered. When they should be monopolizing everything, it's like 'GG this life, dropping all my loot.'
They say even a rich family takes three generations to ruin, but here it's ruined before that.
But here's the kicker.
'The story's core isn't the Bellos Empire.'
So what is the Bellos Empire? 'Just the neighborhood rich idiot big brother position?'
To drag out the plot with a weak start and gradual growth, they make the protagonist a princess from a minor kingdom, with the empire as the handouts machine.
And here's the line that pisses me off most.
"The Bellos Empire... was so overwhelmingly strong, they must have felt burdened all this time."
"Y-yeah."
"Now that they've shared their power... everyone's equal, so the burden's lighter, right? Feels good, doesn't it?"
"Yeah!"
After sucking the empire dry, instead of thanks, it's 'You deliberately weakened your empire so we wouldn't feel burdened by its size.'
"Ugh! Ack! Eek!"
Who wouldn't rage at that? A puny kingdom that'd vanish if we launched a conquest war right now. Spouting 'empire normalization' just because she's the romance fantasy protagonist.
And the second prince cries hearing it. 'Why the fuck?' Total lunatic.
"Yeah, I felt that burden... Being a prince felt so much lighter now. Maybe... I just wasn't cut out for prince life?"
Going even further with that bullshit. Crazy bastard.
'What the hell kind of prince life have you even lived?'
Abandoning every duty, squatting in a minor kingdom handing out everything. Doesn't even grasp what it means for the empire's second prince to be in a foreign palace.
'Hostage, collateral... brain full of flowers, zero clue he could get captured.'
Makes me mad every time I see it.
Why'd I even read it? 'Just happened to...'
Nothing else to do. It was hyped as a new release, I had time, so I dove in. Snapped out of it after some chapters, now critiquing the plot.
'But what the hell's the emperor doing?'
No mention amid the empire's real-time dismantling. Despite ruling, all the pushover decisions come from the first prince.
How's the final authority with the prince, not the emperor? Curious, I scoured comments for lore.
Nothing major. Why the emperor vanished? No details, but probably not sinister.
Could've read more, but too stingy with cash. Too dumb a setup to continue.
"Too many contrived elements too."
Maybe because the protagonist's a minor kingdom princess. To cover her weak background, she's OP as hell.
"Sword in hand and beats knights... blah blah."
Her penalties like stamina and judgment? Covered by artifacts or spirits.
'Whatever, no more reading.'
Done. No point raging. Finished the novel, move on.
'Gonna fall asleep reading tonight too.'
Fun while it lasted.
Too Full from All the Handouts Around Me
A novel I read out of boredom. Farewell.
'Time to jerk off and sleep.'
"No way, the Maselin Kingdom is under threat! We must help them immediately, right?"
"...Th-that's... Your Highness Bedin... It's not a decision we can make lightly."
"What's so hard about it? Helping our neighbor—what's the problem? Maselin's weak, isn't it!"
"B-but why must we help them? I just don't understa—"
"Hah... We help each other to build bonds, and those bonds promise a shared future, right? How can you have such a narrow view!"
"...."
What the hell is this?
What the fuck?
I'd clearly closed my eyes in bed, drifting off peacefully. But opening them, an unfamiliar sight filled my vision.
First thing: a ridiculously luxurious chandelier on the ceiling. Below it, a long oval table straight out of a state council meeting.
'Am I at the head seat?'
Glancing down at my position confirmed it: head of the table.
'A dream? A vivid one?'
But those words I half-heard earlier... why so familiar?
Mouth shut in this bizarre scene, scanning around as the conversation continued.
"We must help now! Protecting their forces is the right call!"
"B-but then our own troops..."
"We're strong! Just send the Executioners, the mightiest, right?"
"The Executioners are the empire's pinnacle forces—how can we casually dispatch them abroad?"
"Hah... They're the strongest, so they'll wrap it up quick!"
"Please, Your Highness Bedin, reconsider..."
As I pieced it together, my ears finally cleared.
'Bedin? Bedin?'
Bedin—as in, from Too Full from All the Handouts Around Me, Bellos Empire's second prince, the lovesick psycho, Bedin Bellos?
'Hold on, hold on...'
Does that mean I'm in the novel?
Realization hit, clearing my refreshed mind into dizziness again.
Why me? Why possess me? Too many complaints? Anyone gripes reading a novel. Why hijack my life? What about my old one?
Thoughts swirled chaotically.
"But what's the point arguing? Big bro decides. Right, hyung? You get me! You'll back me up, yeah?"
"...?"
His words cleared my head instantly.
I stared at the second prince, eyes asking what he was getting at.
Beaming with excitement, he poured it out, eyes full of expectation.
"Send Executioners to Maselin Kingdom! They're in danger—we gotta save them! Right, hyung?! You'll allow it?!"
That instant, rage toward the second prince from the novel surged.
I wanted to calmly explain why not—from basics to ironclad reasons.
But I lacked the eloquence.
So.
"Hey, you fucking moron."
I just spat the conclusion.
Think about it logically. Do you think that'll work?