3. This Is a Bribe, Defeat the Finance Director
3. This Is a Bribe, Defeat the Finance Director
"That concludes my report on the negotiations with the dwarves."
"............."
"Madam Chairwoman?"
"So that's how it went."
The Chairwoman let out a long sigh as soon as I finished speaking.
What was that about? Was she displeased with the terms or the outcome? I thought repairs plus a brand-new measuring device was a pretty decent haul.
What came out of her mouth, however, was something else entirely.
"I should have handled this one myself. Same as last year."
"But we had already agreed on the parameters beforehand, hadn't we?"
"I know that. But you very nearly got seriously hurt, Finance Director."
Well, yes.
Her gaze settled on my bandaged wrist. The spot where the dwarf had grabbed me when I was threatening him with a dagger — just enough to leave a hairline fracture in the bone.
Fortunately, the Chairwoman had healed it herself right there. No need to visit the infirmary, though it still ached a little.
But that was all it was. A trivial injury. Nothing a quick round of healing couldn't fix.
"It was necessary. You know how the dwarves are."
"Back when I was young, the dwarves I met weren't quite this bad."
"It's been over fifty years, ma'am. Their city crumbled in the meantime. The dwarves have changed."
They prey on the weak and cower before the strong.
I said it with a sneer, but it wasn't really a lie. Dwarves treat powerhouses like the Chairwoman with respect, but the moment they size someone up as unambiguously weak, they dismiss them without a second thought.
And "weak" here mostly means weak in combat. Social standing and wealth factor in too, but to dwarves — who live entirely outside human hierarchies — rank among humans barely registers.
Unless you're a king, an emperor, or some grand duke, everyone looks roughly the same to them. Not so different from how all dwarves look like grimy little men to me.
Which is why I had to do something no sane person would do: pull a knife on one.
I knew I couldn't beat a dwarf with a dagger. That was never the point. The point was showing him I had the nerve to go all the way.
And sure enough, the dwarf hadn't been fazed by the dagger itself — what he'd noticed was my refusal to take a single step back.
'And that's why nobody wants to negotiate with dwarves.'
I mean, honestly. This isn't a duel or a death match — it's just a negotiation. Who has to pull a knife just to get through a business meeting?
Any dwarf who comes to the academy for negotiations is bringing a substantial repair contract, and you can't send anyone short of an actual decision-maker to those talks.
So you need someone with both the clout to make decisions and the grit to earn a dwarf's respect.
That was the reason the Chairwoman had always handled every single negotiation herself.
"Which is precisely why I told you, ma'am. From now on, I should be the one dealing with the dwarves, not you."
"But when I step in, things go smoothly. They behave perfectly well when they're standing in front of me."
"Then why did you nearly blow up the Chairwoman's office last year?"
"That — that was because those dwarves insulted my Finance Director right behind my back.........."
"I am well aware of your feelings, ma'am. And yes, it's true — when you handle things personally, negotiations do run more smoothly. But smooth does not always mean optimal."
"................"
"If you had taken the lead this time, do you think we'd have walked away with repairs and a second measuring device? If you were sitting there, the dwarves would've simply done whatever you told them to do and called it a day. They wouldn't have offered extra concessions."
In short: an efficiency problem.
Of course, the easiest route is to have the Chairwoman take over. I wouldn't have to listen to dwarven insults, and I certainly wouldn't have to pull this kind of insane stunt.
But being recognized as a business counterpart, rather than as someone beneath them, has its own advantages. Same reason a company president doesn't personally sit down at the negotiating table.
Peer-to-peer negotiation opens doors that sheer authority can't.
If the Chairwoman had been sitting across from them today, would the dwarves have proposed slipping us a free measuring device in exchange for under-the-table payment discrepancies? No. They would have just followed orders.
The dwarves wanted to pocket the difference. I wanted to trim our costs. Our interests aligned, and we both walked away better off.
But was this some enormous windfall?
'No, not really.'
Honestly, the money we saved today wasn't that substantial. If the academy's finances were healthy, I'd have let the Chairwoman handle it and spared myself the headache.
But right now, the academy is only a few years from bankruptcy. I have to shave down every expense and squeeze out every coin wherever I can.
Objectively, it was a small gain. But I still had to handle the dwarves myself.
It was a small amount in the grand scheme of the academy.
And the fact that we had to care about amounts that small was exactly what said how dire the situation truly was.
"There will be more of this, ma'am. Bribes from the nobility, dwarf negotiations, and many other things besides. We must pursue ruthless efficiency in all of it."
"................"
"So that this academy survives. So that we pull ourselves out of this bankruptcy crisis."
Becoming Finance Director may have been a fluke, but now that I hold the position.
I will do everything I can.
"So, Madam Chairwoman."
"......Yes."
"You shouldn't be worrying about me. You should be pleased the negotiations succeeded, and enjoying the question of where to allocate our new measuring device. That's all."
I tease and brush off the Chairwoman on a daily basis, but she genuinely is someone deserving of respect.
When I looked at her with a confident smile, she smiled back in turn.
"I'm always grateful, Finance Director. Truly."
"You give me too much credit."
"Very well. Then let's decide where to place the new measuring device! The entrance exams are over, so that's not an issue. Should we put it in the measurement room, like the others, or the martial arts training grounds? Or perhaps we could lend it out to whichever professor requests it!"
"Pardon? What do you mean?"
"......Excuse me?"
"Obviously we're going to sell it. Do you have any idea how much this is worth? Even if I unload it at the academy next door, we'll make ten times what I extracted from them today."
Judging by how easily they'd agreed to let it go for cheap, the device had probably seen some years, but even so — rank-measuring instruments are items you literally can't buy for lack of supply.
Human artisans can build devices that go up to the lower ranks, but a measuring tool capable of reading 5th or 6th Rank? Only the dwarves make those.
And demand massively outstrips dwarven production. So even a well-used device would fetch a tidy profit if I sold it off to another private academy.
The Chairwoman simply stood there, mouth agape.
"We've managed just fine with ten devices until now, haven't we? Adding one more won't dramatically speed up student measurements. Selling it is the best move."
"............."
"What are your thoughts, ma'am?"
I mean, I said all that, but if the Chairwoman vetoes it, that's the end of it.
Still, I'd orchestrated that slightly touching atmosphere a moment ago for precisely this reason. Even the Chairwoman wouldn't shoot down selling the device after a moment like that.
"Pfft."
"Ma'am?"
"There it is. That expression. That faintly wicked look suits you so well, Finance Director."
".........?"
Wicked? Me? Was this workplace harassment?
While I stood there baffled, the Chairwoman — still chuckling softly — reached into the box sitting on her desk.
The bribe box I'd received from Beatrice, half its contents already handed off to the dwarves.
From inside it, she fished out a single small coin and flicked it toward me.
"What is this?"
"A performance bonus. Or, well — think of it as a bribe. A little token in appreciation of your continued hard work."
"Didn't you once say you would never accept a bribe from anyone, nor offer one yourself?"
"The Finance Director is the exception. As for the measuring device — I'll have a word with the chairwoman of a nearby private academy. I can't leave that to you as well."
"......Understood."
What was this? I'd been certain the Chairwoman would insist on keeping the device for the students' sake, no question.
A miscalculation, but a welcome one. Roughly estimating the sale price in my head, I studied the gold coin she'd given me.
A solid-gold coin. One of these alone would cover an entire day's wages for all the day laborers the academy employed.
As Finance Director, I'd have to record it as a bribe and add it to the budget rather than pocketing it.
"Right, that's everything! You're dismissed for the day — go home!"
"One moment, ma'am? Bribe or not, we should conserve this coi——"
"I will not hear objections. You worked hard today, didn't you? Now go rest!"
BANG!
With a single gesture, the Chairwoman levitated me out of her office, through the door, and slammed it shut behind me, lock clicking into place.
And so, in the space of an instant, I found myself off duty with a gold coin in my hand.
"......Well. Off duty is off duty."
Off duty. How sweet those words sounded. I pocketed the coin and started walking.
In the opposite direction from my faculty dormitory, as it happened.
There was somewhere I needed to stop by before I went home.
*
"Knew I'd find you here."
"Kaff — Laura?"
"Adam, what are you doing back here alone?"
"What does it look like? Having a smoke."
The corner of the building that housed both the Chairwoman's office and my own.
The structure was so huge that there were plenty of places the eye didn't reach, and this was one of them. My own private smoking spot.
As usual, I was crouched down having a cigarette when an unexpected guest made me choke on the smoke.
How had Laura figured out where to find me?
"The department head told me. Said he once happened to see you smoking back here by yourself."
"......The Food Supplies Management Head."
"More importantly, I was surprised. You smoke? Two years ago, you didn't touch the stuff."
"Back then I was still a student."
I hadn't smoked even back in my original world, when I was grinding away for the civil service exam. So I have no idea whether this world's tobacco is the same as what existed back home.
Though by some coincidence, even the name "tobacco" was identical. Did some Korean senior get isekai'd here before me?
"When did you start?"
"A year ago."
"......Right when you took over as Finance Director, then."
"Something like that."
I'm fairly used to the work now, but back then — going from being the office's newest hire to suddenly becoming Finance Director overnight — it had been hard in ways I can't easily sum up.
The academy's finances in freefall, the gossip and stares from the staff, growing distant from my old peers because of my sudden promotion, things getting worse by the day.
I ran around putting out fires regardless, and somehow I produced results, but the stress piled up all the same.
And somewhere along the line, I'd started smoking. In secret, alone.
"Why not use the smoking lounge?"
"Laura, would you want to run into the Finance Director in the smoking lounge?"
"I wouldn't mind."
"You wouldn't mind because you're my friend. It's common courtesy to avoid each other in places like that."
Besides, the smoking lounge was almost certainly awash in complaints about superiors and all kinds of backbiting. How do you think the atmosphere would turn if the subject of all that walked in?
Just sneaking off to a corner like this was easier on the nerves.
"Anyway, Laura — what's this about you suddenly tracking me down?"
"Hm?"
"We haven't seen each other once in the whole year since I became Finance Director."
That came out a bit more peevish than I intended. A small complaint I'd been carrying about Laura, my friend of three years back when we were both students.
In those early days after the promotion, when I was losing my mind from the pressure — the other classmates I could understand, but I hadn't expected even Laura to avoid me.
Once, I'd reached out and gotten no reply. I sent a few more messages wondering if she just hadn't seen them, until the Food Supplies Management Head told me directly.
"He says you found me intimidating."
".........."
"I was pretty hurt at the time, honestly. It's why I became such good friends with cigarettes."
All through school she'd never stopped going on about graduate programs, but Laura had been my friend, one of the few people I could really talk to.
I'm fine now, but back then I felt completely alone.
Whining about it at this point feels a bit much, but.
Maybe it was because I was smoking right after getting off work. I'd gotten a little emotional.
"......I'm sorry, Adam."
"Look, I'm just saying that's how it was. You were busy too, right?"
"Compared to what you were dealing with, it was nothing. Still, I've sorted everything out now...... so I want to be here for you. Better late than never."
"Like back in our academy days?"
"Like all three of those years."
Yeah, that was genuinely good news.
Though I did get a slight chill wondering if I'd have to listen to the graduate-program talk again.
Still. Good news was good news.
"Anyway, I heard you were running around like crazy today. The exam hall collapse, then I heard you went somewhere else right after, and on top of that you negotiated with the dwarves."
"That so."
Right — today's events.
I'd been working on paperwork when the entrance exam hall collapsed. Went to survey the damage, took a bribe from Risha over the protagonist's enrollment, reported to the Chairwoman, then headed to the waiting dormitory to negotiate with Beatrice and walked away with another bribe, and came straight back for what was essentially a knife fight disguised as a dwarf negotiation.
Busy? That was a normal workload.
If anything, I preferred days like this — running around, seeing people's faces. Once, I spent forty-eight straight hours in my office, no sleep, alone with the ledgers and financial reports, and by the end of it I genuinely wanted to die.
Still, one thing was certain.
'The bribes I took today, half the valuables from the box I handed off to the dwarves, the day-labor wages and meal costs that will be paid out as usual, the mana taxes for keeping the lights and hot water running, all the other maintenance expenses, and then the incoming proceeds from selling the measuring device — when I factor all of that in.'
I'd need to run the numbers at my desk to be sure, but roughly speaking, I could safely say I'd pushed the academy's bankruptcy back by about a week.
One week. Someone might dismiss that as a pittance of time.
"Adam? Why are you smiling?"
"It's nothing."
But if I kept buying these small pockets of time, one after another — maybe someday we'd genuinely climb out of this crisis.
There was plenty left to do. Commission the local carpenters' guild to repair the exam hall. Process the remaining paperwork. Meet with Professor Kirke about the hair-loss remedy revenue. Contract the Magic Tower for the new consecration magic needed at the exam hall. And pull together repair and reconstruction estimates for the buildings that somehow get wrecked multiple times a week.
On top of that, I had to brief the Chairwoman in advance on my agreement with Beatrice, track down more bribe candidates and collect, and keep a close watch on the protagonist who'd just enrolled.
Too much to do, and the future was a fog.
But as I turned the gold coin over and over in my pocket, I felt a hazy thought form in my mind.
It'll work out somehow.
'A thought the Finance Director — the one person who's supposed to stare reality straight in the face — has absolutely no business thinking.'
I smiled wryly, wondering if I'd caught that from the Chairwoman.
"......Adam, here. Take this."
"Hm? What is it?"
"Chocolate. All you ever do is stare at paperwork. Your brain needs some sugar."
"Thanks."
"What's with the thanks? Consider it a bribe. You took a bribe, so now give the Food Supplies Management department a bigger budget."
"Ha."
A bribe, she said. A bribe.
Just how many had I received today?
The bribe from Risha. The bribe from Beatrice. The bribe from the Chairwoman. And now the one Laura had handed me.
A bribe, huh.
"If I've taken a bribe, I'd better return the favor."
"Hm?"
"You off duty? Let's go eat at one of the old places from our student days. My treat."
"......Okay."
I finished off the rest of my cigarette and smiled.
I'd worked hard today.
So that I'd have the strength to work again tomorrow.
*
Time passed, and the entrance ceremony drew near.
The entrance ceremony wasn't merely an event where students and faculty gathered, exchanged a few speeches, and went home. Well — that last part only applied to me, the Finance Director.
The students were simply thrilled about the ceremony that marked the start of their new lives. The faculty either had nothing particular on their minds or were preoccupied with picking out outfits and preparing their own remarks.
As for me, I'd been staring at paperwork, reports, and receipts since yesterday, reviewing and approving every item and expense for the ceremony, when —
"The current entrance examination fails to produce a proper evaluation of the students! Therefore, during the entrance ceremony, we shall unleash phantom monsters and observe how the students respond!!"
"......Excuse me?"
"Finance Director, entrust this matter to me! I shall demonstrate the power of illusion magic!"
No, wait.
Who even are you?