21. Salt Is God and Invincible
21. Salt Is God and Invincible
I didn't reach a conclusion right away.
The Chairwoman's confession wasn't something I could decide on my own, after all.
If it had come from a student, I could've just refused and avoided running into her, but no—it had to be my boss. The kind of boss whose office is right next door, who I see every single day while pulling late nights and all-nighters.
'Refuse and there's a problem. Accept and there's a problem.'
Refuse, and I'd get a very vivid demonstration of why workplace romance or dating coworkers is a bad idea.
Accept, and anyone who thinks I could still handle my workload the way I used to is kidding themselves. It was a headache in every direction.
'I did say I'd give her an answer once this fieldwork was over.'
But then I got tied up negotiating with Count Anton, falling into a mine, dealing with Sacred Relics, and everything else.
<......That's a long sigh.>
"Confessions will do that to you. Does the Self-proclaimed Goddess not know about that sort of thing? From what I hear about the Church, this world only has one goddess."
<......No, I know it quite well.>
"Surprising. Compared to a goddess's own love scandals, my little worries must seem trivial."
I threw a little jab at the Self-proclaimed Goddess, but her voice didn't waver. If anything, she sounded genuinely sympathetic.
It was a strange sensation, so I shook my head and got up.
"I'll be going now."
<What? You haven't said anything yet.>
"A goddess ought to be able to read human minds, shouldn't she? Even so, there's something called privacy."
<Huh? What do you mean?>
She was a friendly presence, but how the hell am I supposed to tell information sources and everyone else that my boss—who's over a hundred years older than me, practically a great-great-grandmother—made a heart with her hands while confessing her feelings? Is there a social death wish I don't know about?
Calling it a confession born of life experience would be rude, but since the Chairwoman had been sincere, I owed her a proper answer.
"Strike while the iron is hot."
<......You mean like burning down the house to roast the pig?>
"What, you know sayings like that because you're a goddess? The meaning is different, though."
Naturally, nobody in this other world understood that proverb, so how did she know it? Could she actually be a real goddess?
Or maybe there'd been another transmigrator besides me. She was mixing up the meanings, so she clearly didn't know all the details.
"It means once you've made up your mind, you do it in one go."
<What? Wait, then that means......!!>
"I'm going to go see her."
Avoiding it forever won't accomplish anything. Stop dragging things out and get it settled for good.
I still hadn't decided whether to refuse or accept, but I could at least talk to the Chairwoman again.
That's what I was thinking just as I reached for the door.
"......Finance Director."
"Huh? Madam Chairwoman? I was actually just about to come see you. About the other day's...."
"I've come about the other day's matter as well."
Huh?
The Chairwoman, who had knocked and entered with impeccable timing, gave a light wave of her hand. That alone was enough for her Rigid Energy to blanket the room—and for the Self-proclaimed Goddess's voice to vanish.
Maybe she was just choosing to stay quiet, but it felt like she'd actually been bounced out. Was the Chairwoman stronger than a goddess? It suddenly hit me all over again that a 1st Rank had received a confession from this sort of being.
"I'm talking about the confession I made the other day."
"Yes, I was just about to bring that up."
"I'm going to hear your answer right here."
"......Pardon?"
"Like I told you earlier, right after the accident, the Surveyor showed up to rescue you and Student Rus. She probably came directly from the royal family."
I'd already heard about the Surveyor's involvement. I still didn't know why she'd happened to be there at that exact moment, but she'd accurately pinpointed the underground position where Rus and I had fallen in the mine.
However, what I'd heard was that the Surveyor had left immediately afterward.
"Do you understand what that means?"
"Not...... really."
"It means the Empire now knows you possess a fragment of the Sacred Relic. There's no way a Surveyor would have missed it."
Wait, seriously? They can even measure something like that?
Then again, I suppose being able to do at least that much is what makes an 8th Rank.
More importantly, in that case—
"Under normal circumstances, I would've silenced her even if it meant killing her, but rescuing you was more urgent."
"By killing her, you mean?"
"If I'd tried to kill the Surveyor on the spot, I might have been able to, but that damned engineer is incredibly troublesome to deal with. It would've taken hours at minimum, the whole surrounding area would've been devastated, and her chances of escape were high. There was also a good chance I'd have been mortally wounded."
"............."
"The mine could have been completely buried by the collapsing surroundings, time might have run out before I finished, or I might've been too badly injured to pull off a rescue. And in the meantime, the engineer headed straight back to the Empire."
"......Couldn't you chase her down now?"
"The Surveyor is 8th Rank as well. She's probably almost reached the imperial border by now, and the Empire will send another 8th Rank out to meet her. Fighting two 8th Ranks at once isn't impossible, but...."
The problem wasn't simply about winning a fight against two 8th Ranks. If it came to that, it would mean all-out war with the Empire.
No matter how much the Chairwoman was regarded as a candidate for the continent's strongest, she naturally wasn't at the level where she could defeat a hegemonic power and its ten 8th Ranks.
In the end, there was no avoiding it: the Surveyor would return to the Empire, and information about me would get out.
"I don't know much about the Empire, so forgive my ignorance, but what sort of problem does that create?"
"For the time being, none at all. The Empire isn't going to target me as a state-level matter...... for now, that is."
"You're saying that later on, if the Empire ever decides to move against you, that information will be used."
"Or certain lunatics might put it to use. Failing that, they could use it as bargaining material with the Holy Kingdom."
"Troublesome either way."
Ultimately, the problem was that nobody knew the Empire's true intentions. It was a hegemonic state, so vast that there was no telling who might use that information or how.
But what did any of this have to do with her confession?
"I don't know how the Empire will judge you, Finance Director. But there is at least one certainty."
"What's that?"
"That at any time, I will be at the Finance Director's side."
Step.
The Chairwoman moved one stride closer.
She fixed those searing eyes on me.
As though glimpses of her long-hidden past nature—the one they used to call the Mad Dragon, the Human Butcher—were surfacing.
"Become mine, Finance Director."
"Ah, um."
"Once word gets out that the Finance Director has become my lover, the Empire won't be able to do things like abduct you. Just as I can't easily touch the Empire, the Empire won't be able to touch me either. A few 8th Ranks, like the Guardian Dragon, might try to target the Finance Director to threaten me, I suppose."
Step.
Closer.
The Chairwoman closed in.
"I'll beat every last one of those thugs to death. I'll rip off their limbs, yank out their guts, and smash their skulls in."
"......Madam Chairwoman?"
"So, please."
"............."
"Say you'll be mine. I'll be yours, too."
Dropping all formal speech, the Chairwoman whispered in a low voice, baring a ferocious and willful nature. Her face said refusal wasn't an option.
......A strange noise came from the door. Even though the Chairwoman had sealed the room with her Rigid Energy, a commotion was brewing outside. Maybe they were trying to break it down.
Even so, the Chairwoman wouldn't allow my attention to wander.
"Look at me."
".........."
"You don't even need to say anything, really. Just nod. That'll be enough."
If I nodded now.
I'd be accepting the Chairwoman's confession and becoming her lover. Not some secret-rumor-mill lover on the side, but her actual lover.
Age aside, the Chairwoman was a captivating person—someone beautiful, someone I wanted to follow. The fact that she wanted only me, that she gazed only at me, was a deeply attractive thing.
However.
"......I told you, nod. Why are you shaking your head? That was a mistake, right? Hm?"
"It was no mistake."
"Is it because...... I'm just an old crone? In the end, you prefer the young ones? Is that it?"
Ah, geez. Why is she going there?
"Stop having strange thoughts on your own. You, Madam Chairwoman, are more beautiful than any woman I've ever seen. Age means nothing."
"Uh, what?"
"I'm refusing your confession not for any other reason, but because I myself am not ready. Just as you love me, Madam Chairwoman, I want to love you completely in return."
Her feelings were utterly sincere, so I wanted to respond with the same sincerity. If I didn't, I'd just be exploiting the Chairwoman's emotions one-sidedly.
But right now, the circumstances weren't ideal for focusing on her alone.
Honestly, I didn't even have that level of feeling for the Chairwoman yet. If I had the luxury, maybe, but inside me, the Chairwoman was someone I respected but also my walking-disaster of a boss.
"I've told you this already, haven't I? Our academy's crisis has not yet been fully overcome. As long as I am the Finance Director, our brink-of-bankruptcy financial state will always be a stumbling block."
"Problems of sentiment or thoughts like that—"
"It's a problem of physical time. Even if we started dating, the time I'd spend looking at you would likely be far shorter than the time I spend looking at paperwork—would you be happy with that?"
"............."
"In the end, I'm saying it's a bad situation for dating or love."
I went through hell in a goshiwon cramming for the civil service exam, so I know: romance requires a certain amount of breathing room in life. The idea of blowing off exam study stress by dating is utter nonsense.
When you have to pour every spare second into studying, why on earth would you? Just pass the damn exam first and then date—no problem at all.
That's the gist of it.
"Please wait just a little longer. I ask this of you."
"......Finance Director, I am."
"Oh, and don't misunderstand. That said, it's not a complete refusal either."
"Excuse me?"
"The Empire knowing that you and I are in a romantic relationship is itself fine. Let's just make it look that way to the outside world."
"Which means......?"
"We don't need to officially declare it, but we can certainly mislead the Empire through subtle physical affection. The rumors inside the academy will explode too, but that's better than my life being in danger, isn't it?"
In other words, pretend to be lovers. Honestly, if playing along with this gets me out of the Empire's crosshairs, a little hit to my social reputation is fine.
In the end, for a 1st Rank like me, the most important thing is staying alive. A 1st Rank gets scorned precisely because they have no ability to protect themselves.
This was my own sort of conclusion. If the Chairwoman took it badly, well, nothing I could do about that.
"......So, in the end, lovers are still lovers, is that what you're saying?"
"Well...... only in outward appearance, but yes."
"That's enough for me."
Huh?
The Chairwoman's expression abruptly cooled. She gestured into the air, and the Rigid Energy that had covered the whole room was withdrawn.
The door burst open!
"Finance Director!"
"Hey, Finance Director! Are you oka—?"
Immediately after, Rus and Chloe—who for some reason had weapons drawn—roughly threw open the door.
And before I had any chance to answer them, the Chairwoman brought her face close to mine.
Until our lips met.
"......!?"
"Pwah! How embarrassing, letting the students see us like this."
"............."
".........."
"I meant to keep it a secret, but I made a 'mistake' and retracted my Rigid Energy...... forgive me?"
What the fuck.
What the hell was that just now......?
*
'You piece of shit.'
How many times had she repeated that phrase now? As ever, Milia was unable to hold back her curses while she buried herself in paperwork.
The thought—'Why am I, the future Pope, doing this kind of work?'—had vanished the moment that devil of a Finance Director bastard caught her and she found herself feeling happy just to receive a paycheck while suffering like this.
In the first place, Milia had clawed her way up from the bottom in her previous life, too. For the sake of the future, she could do this sort of work a hundred times, a thousand times.
But that didn't mean she actually wanted to process a hundred or a thousand documents all by herself.
'When the hell is he coming back......?'
More than a week had already passed since that Finance Director bastard went out on fieldwork. Adam, that son of a bitch who'd said he'd return within a few days, hadn't sent word—was he doing a moonlight flit?
And, the crowning touch, that monster of a Chairwoman bitch had vanished too.
'How the fuck am I supposed to handle all this alone!'
The chaos or the aftermath that would result from this wasn't the problem. The problem was that two of the three people who handle the Finance Department's paperwork had disappeared.
Her heart was screaming at her to just run away, but if she did—
"......What exactly are you doing?"
"Perhaps you don't know, but I've heard that receiving sunlight periodically like this can prevent hair loss."
"......And the salt?"
"I've heard that applying salt and then sunbathing slows the progression of hair loss."
Unlike herself, who was closer to a slave but at least received human treatment, Milia might end up like that professor, who was literally treated as "equipment."
If she was treated like this already, what would happen if she actually became equipment? He might lock her in a solitary room and make her work around the clock, asking why an object needs a salary or the right to leave work.
It wasn't a joke—that devil bastard really seemed like he'd do it, so Milia had no choice but to cling to the paperwork in a grin-and-bear-it misery.
'To think that Kirke would end up in such a state.......'
Milia knew a thing or two about Kirke. The very reason she'd only watched for an opening in her previous life instead of directly invading the Holy Kingdom was because of that terrorist bitch.
Because of the terror attack that bitch had caused after going to the Holy Kingdom, it had become an abject hellscape—unable to be invaded, physically impossible to even enter. Because of that, the Order's plans to secure various Artifacts and Sacred Relics had all come to nothing.
Though, she'd heard that after causing the terror attack, that Ruth woman had killed her.
But still—that a witch of such infamy had fallen to the state of suffering from circular bald spots and believing in folk remedies.
'Trying to win her over...... would be impossible, I suppose.'
The enemy of my enemy is a friend, but the enemy's equipment is not a friend. More importantly, that woman had reduced the Holy Kingdom to that state—was there any guarantee she wouldn't pull the Wish Order into the same hell if she was brought in?
Not every terrorist is a friend. Rather, since Kirke was the reason Milia had been forced to shelve her plans for the Holy Kingdom, watching her suffer like this was actually rather satisfying.
Having faced reality and deciding to throw herself back into work in order to avoid becoming equipment, Milia—
Creak.
"Student Milia, I've come ba—."
"Why are you so late!"
"Um."
"The backlog of documents is piled sky-high right now! This stuff here is paperwork that only the Finance Director or the Chairwoman can touch, so it just keeps piling up!"
Just what kind of brass-faced bastard had he become, to be this late and still so brazen? Milia had thought she at least somewhat understood Adam Caines, but no matter how she thought about it, the current him seemed even more vicious than before.
Right after she'd shouted and relieved just a tiny bit of her stress, Adam—looking haggard, as if he'd been put through hell—glanced at the documents piled on the office desk, pondered something for a moment, then approached Kirke, who was sunbathing with salt rubbed on the crown of her head.
"Professor Kirke, what are you doing?"
"I-I'll go right back to my research! I'm sorry! I was wrong! Please, just no more pay cuts......!! I at least want to drink as much water as I like!!"
"Do you need salt?"
"......Pardon?"
"If that is what you desire, it shall be granted."
Why is this bastard suddenly spouting cult-leader nonsense?
Milia wondered, but her doubts soon turned to shock.
"This...... is?"
"A bonus. The contents are entirely salt."
"Huh, wha?"
'That devil bastard is giving a bonus?'
No, more fundamentally, that bastard actually had the concept of a bonus? And in salt, of all things?
The only reason it even made sense was that this was a kingdom second only to the Empire—in smaller nations, salt was incredibly precious. Even in the Kingdom, salt sometimes replaced gold or silver coins in transactions.
A sack that size full of salt was worth the equivalent of half of Milia's own monthly pay. He was giving that kind of money as a bonus?
That miserly son of a bitch?
"Now that things have come to this, how about you start receiving your annual salary in salt? I'll generously give you a 0.5% raise."
"Fi-Finance Director......!!"
"Um, Finance Director? I've also been working hard—"
"Of course, Student Milia, the same goes for you. From now on, your full monthly wages will be delivered in salt. A 1% raise is a bonus on top."
"Th-Thank you!"
A full 1% raise! Compared to Kirke, it was nearly double the increase, and for a moment Kirke's eyes were filled with jealousy—but Milia was already swimming in bliss.
If she could sell the salt at a good price to the smaller kingdoms, or somewhere that offered a favorable market rate, she could end up with a bit more than her original salary.
Especially if she sent it to the Order, which had fallen into destitution, it would be a huge help in expanding her own influence there.
'But why is the Finance Director suddenly acting like this?'
The honorific in her thoughts naturally shifted from "bastard" to "Director," but she was more curious about the reason.
I mean, it wasn't like salt was springing forth infinitely—why was he suddenly paying them in salt?
But since her income was effectively increasing, she merely praised the Finance Director.
"Long live the Finance Director! Our debt, our salt!"
"Our salt!"
"Student Milia, Professor Kirke."
"Yes!"
"Yes!!"
"Now that you know, get back to work."
"............."
"................"
You magnificent piece of shit......