Fallen Holy Hime Angelica

When did I first feel love? It must have been back in elementary school. The kind of one-sided crush everyone has at least once.

That memory of hanging around the playground with the other boys, and staring openly whenever the girl you liked walked home. Trying to strike up a conversation because you wanted, somehow, to get close to her; and even when a childish urge to tease her flared up, swallowing it down and holding it in. Wanting to be with her so badly that you even did embarrassing things like playing house together. Everyone has at least one memory like that, don't they?

My case wasn't quite so grand. It was simply a meeting with a certain spirited girl — someone I ran into while walking home alone in a sullen mood after fighting with a close friend over something trivial, whether I'd knocked over his desk or something like that.

At the time, at least, I didn't think she was pretty. It was just that — how should I put it — strangely, I wanted to be with her. That was all.

"What should we play? Hey, see the jungle gym? Follow me!"

That fluffy, easygoing girl who led me along. I liked her.

The reason we were suddenly parted was that her parents' business had failed and she had to move away. I didn't know the details back then, but I still vaguely remember the conversations my parents had with each other, thinking I couldn't hear.

"Where… are you going?"

At the jungle gym in the setting sun, she asked me that.

"Yeah…."

"Far away?"

"…I don't know."

"Really? Then why are you crying like that?"

"Because I don't want to… say goodbye to you."

"Hee hee, a boy crying? How about that."

She patted me gently on the back.

"My name's Ahyun, by the way. What's yours?"

"Hyunwoo…."

"Now that we know each other's names, we can meet again even after we say goodbye!"

"…Even so."

"Oh come on, I told you not to cry? It's only one last day, isn't it? You don't want to play with me?"

"That's… not it…."

"Then dry those tears! Let's go ride the seesaw!"

The boy I was let her take my hand and drag me to the seesaw, bobbing up and down. Every time I saw Ahyun's smiling face rising toward the sky, somehow it made me want to cry even more.

And so my first love ended.

That must have been when it started — the reason I took up exercise, so I'd never cry again. So that if by some miracle we ever met ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠again, I would never, ever let her see me in tears. I wanted to become the kind of man Ahyun would look at and think, wow, he's so cool.

Whether it was fortunate or unfortunate, it turned out my face wasn't bad. I didn't learn that until middle school, when girls started flocking around me.

Of course, I turned them all down.

Most of them clung to me wanting to go to karaoke or out on dates, and some approached me even though they already had boyfriends. It wasn't a pleasant experience.

By the time I was nearly done with middle school, I had no interest at all in the things other guys did — drinking, smoking, the whole romance of practicing songs at karaoke for the girl you liked. I just remained an ordinary, unremarkable guy, number one in plainness.

Thanks to my parents' business recovering, I was free to choose my own high school, and I picked one that was prestigious at the time, matched to my grades.

…And at that high school, I met Ahyun again.

To give you the conclusion first: Ahyun didn't recognize me.

Which was fair enough. She couldn't possibly have imagined that that little tomboy would grow up into someone this masculine. And besides, I wasn't so pure-hearted that I could bring up that story with her, just the two of us. I simply thought it would be enough to keep it buried in one corner of my chest and stay close friends. We happened to be in the same class, after all.

What's more…, she had changed a lot from the Ahyun I remembered. She'd grown so beautiful compared to the fluffy, boyish girl from childhood that it made it hard to casually bring up the past.

But I wanted to be with her, so I clung to her however I could. Inviting her to the PC room, or suggesting we go watch a baseball game since she liked baseball. She's easygoing, I told myself, she'll be fine with this much.

At first we laughed and got along well, but as I grew closer to her, one of my friends came up to me and said something.

Word is, she's a lesbian.

The moment I heard it, I lost control of my emotions and glared at him, and he made excuses that it was just a rumor going around.

Apparently, because Ahyun was so easygoing and completely unguarded around boys, she got misunderstood like that a lot. Someone also mentioned that back in middle school, she and Soyoung had been glued to each other's sides, going everywhere together.

I punched him once for spouting that bullshit and sent him on his way, but afterward, I did find myself wondering what would happen if Ahyun started dating someone. It just left me conflicted, scratching my head.

A rumor like that wouldn't faze a girl as strong as her. Thinking so, I kept being her close friend, just as always.

…But after Ahyun brought Soyoung into our circle, something about our relationship changed.

"This is Soyoung, my childhood friend. She's been ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠wanting to meet you so~ badly? You two get along, you hear? This unnie will be cheering for you both."

"What unnie, you brat?"

That's definitely the conversation we had.

Soyoung was, without question, adorable. With fluffy Ahyun and cute Soyoung attached at the hip every single day, it was only natural strange rumors would fly.

The problem was, Soyoung liked me. What on earth did she see in me?

Come to think of it quietly, I figured Ahyun must have created that opportunity because she trusted me. Which meant, at the very least, she had feelings for me — enough that she felt safe entrusting me with her childhood friend.

Besides, I worried that if I refused there, it might hurt Ahyun for having made the introduction. And Soyoung herself, the one actually involved, would be left feeling awkward too.

And so, over three years of high school, we got to know each other, and I came to like Soyoung as well… and in the end, the two of us started dating.

"About time. Take good care of her."

"Ahyun, wait a second…."

"What, you've got a girlfriend to see, don't you? Go on, hurry up, you punk. A man's got no business dawdling like that."

I still can't forget Ahyun's face as she turned away, saying those words.

Why did she make that expression? Was it the face of someone happy for Soyoung? Did she really like Soyoung…?

But it's an irreversible fact. That triangle — Soyoung liked me, I liked Ahyun, and Ahyun liked Soyoung. Maybe I ran away because I didn't have the confidence to accept it.

…I love Soyoung. That much is certain. The way she blushed every time we held hands, the way she smiled that embarrassed smile over her weirdly mismatched couple rings, the first kiss we shared on a rainy day — I loved all of it.

And yet, I hated the thought of Ahyun drifting away from me.

I wanted the three of us to stay together. Was that greed?

Should I have given up one of them?

Even now, in college, I still couldn't find the answer from back then. No — to be precise, by the time I tried to work through the answer together with Soyoung, she had already disappeared.

Soyoung's last message was a KakaoTalk she'd sent about three weeks ago, saying she had a professor's assignment to do. Even then, I had no idea she would vanish in the blink of an eye.

And now Ahyun, the one who'd said that, had been out of contact for two weeks.

Where had the two of them disappeared to?

Twisted up inside, I bought a pack of cigarettes — something I'd never smoked in my life. Two people, vanished without leaving a single trace. Desperate for even a fragment of what had happened, I wandered the streets around campus, but I came up with nothing.

What on earth have I been doing? Ahyun told me to take good care of Soyoung, and I should have.

Why am I still floundering like this?

"…I guess I never left that summer after all."

It was just as I muttered that and let out a deep sigh.

An instant later, a jolt of electricity slammed through my whole body. I'd never been hit before, but it was enough to make me think, so this is what a stun gun feels like.

A sudden wave of agony striking me while I had alcohol in my system was more than enough to rob me of consciousness, and in the end, my eyes closed just like that.

"Hyunwoo."

"…."

"Jang Hyunwoo?"

When I opened my eyes, Ahyun was looking down at me.

I'd been certain that if we met again, I'd have a whole speech ready — but the moment I saw her face, all I could think was that I was glad she was safe.

"…Ahyun. Where the hell have you been?"

"What, were you worried about me?"

"Obviously. Soyoung's worried sick, you know. So — did you find her?"

"Hm…."

Something about the atmosphere was off. Slightly, strangely off.

This was Ahyun, who'd always been so easygoing, yet somehow she seemed oddly… sensual, somehow. And those black earrings I'd never seen her wear before were strikingly memorable.

"I see…, worrying about Soyoung the second you lay eyes on me."

"You're the one who told me to worry."

"…Yeah. Yeah, I did."

"So anyway, where is this place—"

Come to think of it, where was this? And why was she here of all places…?

I tried to move, but a metallic clank stopped me cold. My arms were bound behind me.

"This place is…, well. It's where everything you have is about to be taken from you."

"Taken…? What is that supposed to mean."

"…Hey, Hyunwoo."

Ahyun swept her hair back behind her ear with a softness I had never once seen from her, and said:

"I've found someone I love."

It was, quite literally, the expression I had always wanted to see from her. Ahyun, in love…. The expression I'd dreamed of — the one I'd hoped she would wear, for me.

My stomach lurched. I couldn't keep my face composed. The girl I loved was going to be with another man.

I couldn't accept it. I had to see the face of whatever bastard dared to date Ahyun. What kind of son of a bitch could possibly—

…I forced myself to calm down. If she truly fell in love and started dating him, then I had to congratulate her first.

Except for the words that came out of her mouth immediately after.

"Which is why…, I'm going to let Soyoung know that same joy."

"…What?"

My mind couldn't keep up.

Before I could even ask what she meant, she opened the door. And in the very next moment, I saw it — I couldn't help but see it.

A man, fingers casually buried in a woman as though it were the most natural thing in the world, pumping away with wet, obscene sounds.

And Soyoung — naked, her face dazed and unfocused, shuddering through climax after climax without end.

"What…, what are you…, doing…."

Ahyun walked over to Soyoung, still cradled in the man's arms, and kissed her — all while looking straight at me. Her tongue moved deliberately, ostentatiously. As if to say she was stealing something from me.

"Hahh…. I'm sure you don't understand, Hyunwoo. Mm, I suppose that's only natural."

"Damn right I don't! You show up out of nowhere and — what is all this…!!"

"But you have to accept it."

"What?"

"My Master is…, the one who taught me joy and love. The one who showed me pleasure by putting his cock inside my pussy…. Soyoung deserves to know the very same thing. Isn't that only right?"

What is she saying right now?

"Hyunwoo."

"…."

"Once upon a time…, yes. I think I wanted to be with you."

"…What?"

"Your expressions. The way you carried yourself like a man. The way you looked, all sweaty, playing soccer during P.E. — all of it made me think of myself as a woman. The reason my magical girl outfit looks like a wedding dress is…, I suspect it's because I wanted you to notice me, to look good in your eyes.

But you only ever saw me as a friend, didn't you? Or maybe you just never found me attractive as a woman at all?"

"N-no, that's not…! I…!"

Magical girl? Wedding dress? It was a flood of words I couldn't make sense of. My heart was pounding like a drum.

"I always…, always watched you. I never once forgot you, not for a second.

I wanted to talk to Soyoung too — I wanted the three of us to be together, always."

"Then you should have said something sooner."

"…."

"You should have held me in your arms, made my pussy soak and drip, and thrust into me with that cock…, made me yours."

"…Ahyun?"

"I suppose you really are a pitiful excuse for a man, compared to my Master. So watch. Watch how I — the girl you never chose to hold — was transformed by my Master's grace."

From Ahyun's brooch, from her staff, a violet-black light bloomed outward.

Violet-black light erupted ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠from Ahyun's body. Wrapped in that dark radiance, she became a silhouette of bare skin veiled in light, and piece by piece, lewd garments began to dress her.

The bridal veil resting upon her head — the very symbol of a ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠bride — had been stained pitch black.

There was nothing left in her eyes but purity and shyness — nothing of them, that is, remained at all.

The obscene outfit that bared her hips and smooth belly, the heart-shaped tattoo drawn across her lower abdomen — every inch of it stoked the heat between my legs.

Only clothes made for one purpose — seducing men — remained, and they stained even that last fragment of Magical Girl Lyca still living somewhere in my heart.

"I am no longer the Magical Girl Lyca who once saved you.

Reborn anew for my Master's sake…, I am Fallen Holy Hime, Angelica."