Responsibility
It wasn't enough that we had spent the entire night on the bed, madly craving each other's warmth; even after waking up and heading to the washroom to clean ourselves, we had ended up violently desiring one another once more.
Under the pouring water, I had reached out to touch her body under the pretense of helping her wash, only to lose my reason and pounce on her again. By the time we finally finished our shower and headed back to the bedroom, my body felt exhausted all over again. Eve, too, had abandoned her usual neat, steady gait, instead leaning slightly against my shoulder as she took slow, sluggish steps.
'Ah, I really just want to do nothing and rest today.'
My mind was filled with nothing but thoughts of a soft bed and sweet sleep. I smiled, imagining myself diving straight into the mattress as I wrapped my arm around Eve’s waist and opened the bedroom door. But as the door swung open, the sight that met my eyes brought back a memory I had completely forgotten.
“Ah….”
A hollow sigh escaped my lips. The bed was messily stained with the remnants of our wild night. It was, quite literally, the ruins of a battlefield. The traces of the intensity that had lasted from last night until this morning remained all too vividly on the sheets and blankets. Beyond being crumpled and a disaster, it was in a state that was not only damp and embarrassing to sleep in, but frankly, unhygienic.
“For now… I should wash the bedding,” Eve muttered in a small, retreating voice. I clutched my forehead and let out a deep groan.
“Haa… how did I forget this? I want to lie down and rest right now, but there’s no way I can in this state. If I do, I won’t be able to sleep a wink feeling this gross.”
If the research bunker had been stocked with piles of extra blankets or bedding, I would have just kicked these aside and grabbed new ones. Unfortunately, the only blanket we had to cover ourselves with was the one currently sprawled out in front of us.
Clinging to a sliver of hope, I hurried to the Terminal Shop installed in the lobby. It was that inefficient kiosk where I had ground up 500 iron bars yesterday just to get 100 Money. I tapped the screen and urgently opened the search bar.
[Search: Blanket, Bedding, Quilt, Mattress]
[Search results do not exist.]
“No, you sell every variety of useless wooden chairs and pickaxes, so why don’t you sell a single scrap of fabric to sleep under! What kind of shop is this!”
I vented my frustration by punching the air at the holographic terminal. This damn system had thoroughly disappointed my desperate plea.
In the end, there was no other way. I dragged my heavy feet back to the bedroom, bundled up the ruined bedding, and held it in my arms.
“Can’t be helped. Even if I want to lie down right now, I have to do the laundry first. It’s the only one we’ve got.”
We rolled up our sleeves and headed back to the washroom. I placed the bedding under the pouring showerhead, sprayed it with liquid soap, stepped in barefoot, and began to stomp on it firmly.
“Jaero, let me do it. You must be tired; please leave this kind of labor to me.”
Eve approached with an apologetic look, trying to stop me. But I shook my head and took her hand, pulling her in.
“No, we made this mess together, so I can’t just rest alone. Come here and stomp with me. It’ll be much faster with two people than one.”
Eve hesitated for a moment before stepping in opposite me. As soapy bubbles rose up and our bare feet occasionally bumped into each other through the wet fabric, Eve would startle and offer a shy smile.
The woman who had been so provocative in this shower room last night and this morning was now laughing so innocently and youthfully. For a fleeting moment, I forgot my fatigue, and a warm, fuzzy feeling bloomed in the corner of my heart.
However, the moment I tried to wring out the wet bedding with all my might to get the soap out, a cold chill ran down my spine.
‘Wait a minute… what about contraception?’
It was a shock, as if I’d been struck in the back of the head with a hammer. Why was I only realizing such a critical and fatal fact at this very moment? Yesterday and today, intoxicated by the atmosphere and the pleasure, I hadn't thought about the ‘consequences thereafter’ even once.
‘If, just if Eve were to get pregnant?’
My heart began to pound like crazy, thumping against my chest. Of course, it wasn’t that I had the cowardly heart to avoid taking responsibility for Eve. On the contrary, if I were to have a child and Eve became my family, I would be truly happy. I was prepared to protect them even if it cost me my life.
The problem was this damn world we were in. This wasn't a peaceful modern society; it was a ruined world where civilization had collapsed.
It was an environment where I couldn't even find common antiseptic, an ultrasound machine, or basic antibiotics, let alone an OB/GYN to check on the mother’s health. On top of that, we didn't even have proper food, forced to survive on the potatoes I’d just put into the cultivator. If a child were born, I couldn't just feed them potatoes.
In such a horrific environment, if Eve were to get pregnant, endure ten months, and have to give birth while suffering through agonizing labor? What if an emergency occurred during childbirth, or if the bleeding wouldn't stop? All I could do would be to helplessly hold her hand and despair.
As my imagination spiraled into the worst-case scenario, my vision blurred and my breathing grew shallow. My hands, still clutching the wet bedding, began to tremble visibly.
“Jaero? Your complexion is very pale. Are you feeling unwell?”
Eve, who had noticed my abnormal symptoms first, rushed over and cupped my cheeks. I forced myself to swallow a dry lump in my throat and opened my mouth, speaking very carefully and in a trembling voice.
“E-Eve.”
“Yes, Jaero. Please, speak.”
“Is it possible… that you could get pregnant from what happened last night and this morning? No, don’t misunderstand me! If you were to have a child, I would do anything, give everything I have to feed and take responsibility for you and the child. I can swear that on my life. But…”
I didn't meet Eve’s eyes, instead looking at the wall as I continued.
“There are no hospitals here, no doctors, not even painkillers to reduce the pain of childbirth. I’m just so afraid that you might be in danger… If something were to happen to you, I don’t think I could stay sane in this world. The thought of losing you suddenly made me so terrified.”
At my sincere concern, Eve’s blue eyes widened. She stared blankly at my trembling gaze for a moment, then suddenly let out a very small, soft laugh.
“Jaero, thank you so much for worrying about me so deeply. Just having such a warm heart makes me feel like I’ve already been saved. However, you don’t need to worry about that at all.”
Eve carefully wrapped her warm hands around my cold, wet ones and began to explain.
“As you know, I am an android. When I was designed, the technology of the old civilization could not reconstruct complex human internal organs or reproductive processes to their liking. Therefore, for the sake of physical stability and durability, I was created using a biological structure almost identical to that of a normal human female as a base. However, in that process, intentional adjustments and design changes were applied to several key areas.”
She stared straight into my eyes and continued in a calm tone.
“One of them is the ‘infertility trait.’ To fundamentally prevent androids from reproducing in ways that are uncontrollable or unintended for their purpose, or from being unable to perform combat or their primary missions for long periods due to pregnancy, reproductive functions were designed to be thoroughly suppressed. While I cannot state on the system level that the probability is 0%, from a medical perspective, it is effectively perfect infertility. So, you don’t need to worry at all about the risks of pregnancy or childbirth in this harsh environment.”
As Eve’s detailed and logical explanation ended, the string of nerves in my head that had been pulled taut, threatening to snap, suddenly went slack.
‘I see… that’s such a relief.’
A massive sigh of relief burst from deep within my heart. I felt relieved to be freed from the terrible fear of the worst-case scenario—that I might lose Eve forever to the agony of childbirth in this wretched apocalypse.
However, I desperately managed my expression, trying not to show that relief too overtly. Even if she was an existence designed as an android, the fact that she could not conceive life herself could, in some sense, remain as a wound or a deficiency in a corner of her heart.
I quietly pulled Eve into my arms and held her tight. I gently patted her wet shoulder and whispered into her ear in a very soft, affectionate voice.
“Yeah, I understand. If you say so, then it must be true. For me, the fact that you are here, safe and healthy, is enough. Thank you for being by my side, Eve.”
“Jaero….”
Eve’s voice trembled slightly. She buried her face deep in my chest and wrapped both arms tightly around my waist. Her heartbeat was transmitted clearly through my chest.
After finishing the laundry and hanging it out to dry in the wide space outside the research bunker, I sat alone on a nearby tree stump and fell into deep thought. The pregnancy scare from just a moment ago had given me a very painful realization.
‘I still know so little.’
I had been complacent, thinking I was the protagonist of this world, but in reality, I had no idea what power source kept this iron fortress running, nor did I understand the true nature of this game-like system.
And above all, what was most shameful was the fact that I knew woefully little about the only companion by my side, the woman I had come to love and cherish so much: ‘Eve.’ I had never once seriously asked or explored what factors she was designed with, what abilities she possessed, what biological limitations she had, or what past she existed with before I arrived.
‘I just blurted out that I would take responsibility, but I didn't actually try to understand her properly.’
I deeply reflected on my ignorance and complacency. While it would be impossible to uncover all the systemic secrets of this massive research bunker overnight, I vowed that at least regarding Eve, I would take the time to learn about her slowly and very deeply.
What she prefers, whether she has any hidden struggles as an android. Now, I had to become a true companion who not only understood her appearance but also perfectly understood and embraced her inner structure.
As another day passed, filled with such realizations and self-reflection, the moment I had been waiting for finally arrived.