Chapter 34
Chapter 34
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Translator: Vine
Chapter: 34
Chapter Title: Overdose
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"We're leaving? We're leaving now?"
It was a hopeful turn, but an unexpected one.
Thankfully, I didn't have much to pack.
Are we going right away?
How?
"We can go out for about five hours. They won't look for us for a few hours once we're out."
"I see."
"So let's go."
"Aren't you going to say goodbye to your other friends?"
Han Si-hoo had built up so much at the academy.
Giving it all up and leaving wouldn't be easy.
He must feel a sense of responsibility to others besides me.
"I can do that later."
"...But you have so many friends?"
"If they're my friends, they'll understand."
That wasn't the only problem.
"You need to be at the academy to get stronger. Outside, you can't meet people, there are no good facilities, and you can't get items easily."
"I know."
"And you're still leaving with me?"
It would be nice to go back to how things used to be.
There was a certain charm to those days.
We didn't have all these troublesome things back then.
"Let's go."
The door is open.
Freedom is in sight.
The only thing I need to take is the medicine.
Holding it in my hand is reassuring.
[32 hours 57 minutes]
Han Si-hoo grabs my arm.
As if urging me to hurry.
I have plenty of time for now.
It's perfect.
My body is fine.
My legs feel a little heavy, but I can run.
Alright, let's go.
*Clank.*
*Thud.*
I tripped on something and fell.
My head feels like it's growing cold.
Is it because the floor is actually cold?
It doesn't hurt.
I just need to get up and go.
I'm fine, after all.
So let's get out and follow Han Si-hoo home.
*Clank.*
Something is still caught on my leg.
*Clank, clank.*
It's properly caught.
What is this?
"...A rope?"
A rope is wrapped around my left ankle.
The rope leads to the leg of the desk, tied around it.
Who did this?
Who would come into my room and tie me up?
There was no one else here but me.
That's right.
Come to think of it, it was just me.
Han Si-hoo could have just untied it.
"Si-hoo?"
But no one is there.
The door is closed.
Did he leave without me?
"Si-hoo."
Where could he have gone?
He's nowhere to be seen.
I don't even know when the door closed.
The situation is incomprehensible.
[32 hours 55 minutes]
The timer is ticking down at a normal rate.
So there's nothing wrong with me.
Right?
"You said we were going home."
I liked the plan of officially going out and then running away.
Going out, huh.
Come to think of it, I think I was banned from leaving, even if Han Si-hoo wasn't.
Was the plan doomed from the start?
I guess so.
My head is finally starting to clear.
It's because I'm low on the medicine.
*-Pshk.*
[34 hours 50 minutes]
"...You're waiting outside, right?"
You have to be, right?
Han Si-hoo is outside.
I toss the used syringe aside.
I grab a kitchen knife.
I cut the rope tied to my ankle.
Freedom.
I don't remember when or why I tied it.
"Are these clothes okay?"
I asked Si-hoo, but there was no reply.
It's free time anyway.
I'm just in a t-shirt and shorts, but it should be fine.
The bandages are wrapped.
I'll open the door and leave.
But it won't open.
"The door's locked."
It's locked from the inside.
If it was locked, it must have been me.
Did I really hate the idea of going out that much?
No, this wouldn't stop someone from leaving from the inside.
It would stop someone from coming in, though.
Outside.
From the outside?
I wonder how Han Si-hoo got in.
For one, he doesn't know the passcode to the door.
Even with a master key, what about the deadbolt locked from the inside?
Well, that's a problem the medicine can solve.
[34 hours 46 minutes]
Where's the medicine?
One more shouldn't hurt.
If I don't keep using it, all that's left is the fall.
I need to get more medicine.
I stumbled to the bathroom.
Maybe splashing my face with cold water will change something.
I'll be able to get a grip.
My willpower is weak.
No matter how I think about it, it's a hallucination.
Visual, auditory, tactile hallucinations.
It's a mess.
There are eight empty syringes, but my memory of using them is spotty.
I can understand why I tied myself up with a rope.
I don't know what I might do.
There's no hope once I've lost my self-control.
Cold water.
The cold water touches my palms.
It's ice-cold.
I think I'm coming to my senses.
Bring me more medicine.
This isn't quite enough.
I feel good, but I know I can feel even better.
This alone isn't enough.
I'm screwed anyway.
Since I'm already screwed, I might as well go all the way.
As far as I can.
*-Vzzzzt.*
The sound of my device vibrating.
*-Vzzt.*
I think I'm getting a call.
But it's probably just an auditory hallucination.
Where did Han Si-hoo go?
I just saw him a moment ago.
I don't know how many doses I've used today.
If I could get my hands on one now, I'd use it.
That much is certain.
Who would have the medicine?
Han Si-hoo must have it.
He probably has some extra he hasn't given me.
*-Vzzt.*
It's a call from Han Si-hoo.
My mind keeps thinking about Han Si-hoo, so the hallucination manifests this way.
No need to answer.
I probably can't answer it anyway.
After a moment, the call ends.
[Missed Calls - 11]
There are so many.
Most of them are from Han Si-hoo.
There's one from Rena, too.
It's hard to tell if this is real before the effects wear off.
This has happened before.
The pleasure is so intense, it's strange not to lose control.
If I break, even for a moment, it's over.
Did I break?
Me?
Normally, Yoo Seo-ah would already be dead.
It's only because it's me that I've managed to hold on this long.
*-Vzzzzt.*
"Shut up."
*Smash.*
I brought the kitchen knife down on the device.
"Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up."
I kept stabbing until it broke.
Just a moment ago, I thought I could get out.
Leave the academy.
But what could I do once I left?
Something is wrong, and if I have to ask who's to blame, it's me.
If it were someone else's fault, I could at least get revenge, but that's not it.
Everyone else tried to be good to me.
Well, not everyone was good to me.
There were some strange people.
But they aren't people I need to get revenge on.
"Or are they?"
They stabbed me with a knife.
Broke my arm.
Kicked me and punched me in the stomach.
Aren't they all bad people?
I think the medicine is making me confused.
I'm always using it, so it's inevitable that my sense of reality dulls.
But without the medicine, I'll die.
I'd do anything, just give me the medicine. That's what I'd say.
For now, the academy is giving me the medicine, so it's fine.
I feel like Han Si-hoo will figure something out, but there's a limit to that, too.
I need to feel better.
Don't other people live with similar thoughts?
Pain is evil, and pleasure is good.
-I will give you a better medicine than this for the rest of your life.
Who made such a good offer?
The Doctor.
What did he want in return for that offer?
-Kill Han Si-hoo.
Impossible.
And I doubt that promise is still valid.
-For life.
A better medicine.
My mind keeps drifting back to the past.
[34 hours 29 minutes]
There's plenty of time.
More than enough.
If I were at home, I could just lie on the floor and wait.
Wait.
Just wait for the next dose.
But if there is no next dose, there's nothing I can do.
I have to find some medicine.
I turned off the lights before leaving.
It's a little better now that I can't see.
I hate looking at a messy room.
Come to think of it, there's medicine in here.
I just ran out of syringes.
"...There was this, too."
I found it while rummaging through a drawer.
Pills. The kind you swallow.
Did Han Si-hoo get them from Lee Yoo-ram and give them to me?
I don't know, but I'll take them first and see.
[34 hours 57 minutes]
I downed all the pills I had, but it didn't give me that special feeling.
The peak of pleasure doesn't return easily.
At this rate, it'll be a 34-hour downhill slide.
I feel good right now.
Not bad, but I'm scared of the crash that's coming.
All I need is the medicine.
Taking the pills helped a little.
Right?
My vision keeps cutting out.
Like a monitor whose power keeps flickering on and off.
It flashes and goes dark.
It's staticky.
The next moment, it's on again.
I used too much medicine.
That means the treatment will work faster, so that's good.
So I just need to use more.
*Crackle.*
It feels like electricity is sparking inside my body.
The monitor must be broken.
My vision is distorting.
Overheating.
I should stick my head in coolant and cool down.
*Splash.*
The sink is so full of water it's overflowing.
Cooling.
If I cool my head, I'll be able to think clearly.
It feels cold.
It's hard to open my eyes.
"*Gasp.*"
I lifted my head.
Holding my breath is scary.
But I think my head has cooled down.
My vision is still weird.
What am I supposed to do if I can't see the screen?
No matter how crappy the game is, you should at least be able to see the screen.
Usually in these situations, hitting the computer tower or the monitor makes it work again.
Machines only listen when you hit them.
The dust stuck to the circuits falls off, and it goes back to normal.
*Flicker.*
Twinkle, twinkle, little star.
The objects in my field of view aren't moving.
Even the running water looks frozen.
I'm moving, but I'm not moving.
It's flickering.
The door shakes with a loud *thump, thump*.
What now?
I picked up the kitchen knife.
Come to think of it, is it really necessary to use the medicine's effect just to make a kitchen knife?
Why not just use a weapon?
I closed my eyes and opened them to find the door open.
The deadbolt seems to have been useless.
It's not so much open as it is torn off.
Someone is standing in front of the torn-off door.
"Ah, hi. Si-hoo."
Han Si-hoo had opened the door.
He's breathing heavily.
He looks like he ran a long way.
Even his bewildered expression is the same as before.
Is this just another hallucination?
I can't even hear what Han Si-hoo is saying.
"Aha."
The problem is that I took too much medicine.
There's only one solution.
Using more medicine.
"Ha, heheh, did you happen to bring any medicine?"
Give me something.
You came to help me, right?
I remember now.
Around the fourth time I used a syringe, I pressed the emergency button on my device.
I must have done it because I thought Han Si-hoo would bring more medicine when he came.
"You don't have any?"
I see.
But the Doctor said he'd give me plenty of medicine for life.
He said he'd give it to me if I just killed you.
But I've been holding back so well until now.
I've held back, not using much medicine.
Trying to be friends, not killing you.
Well, I did kill, but those were magical beasts.
It wasn't my choice.
Anyway, I can kill you, but I'm not going to.
[34 hours 5 minutes]
Dammit.
My mouth seems to be moving on its own.
Spilling out all the words I wish I wouldn't say.
Si-hoo?
Would it be okay if I killed you just once?
You want to help me too, right?
He said he'd keep giving me medicine.
Right?
That's a good thing, isn't it?
I'm only at the academy because of the medicine.
With that, I'll be able to leave the academy.
We're friends, right?
You're the protagonist, so you can do something even if you die, can't you?
Please help me, just this once.
Please die for me, just this once.
Sorry.