The Return of the Raven
The update was complete.
“Gurgle… gurgle…”
“Raven-nim… my eyes, my eyes… I can’t see anything… ugh.”
“Then open them, Contractor.”
“Oh… it’s Raven-nim……”
“This is ridiculous. Absolutely ridiculous.”
The black-mage cosplayer and the nekomimi rogue who had been chugging honey mead like water finally succumbed to the demonic beast known as alcohol and passed out completely.
“Gurururong…”
“My demon… my… demon……”
Sion was curled up like a shrimp under the table, fast asleep, while Yuri, my contractor, had her head propped against my elbow, mumbling nonsense in broken fragments. I glared at Noir, the tavern owner who had served these two their drinks, and racked my brain for a way to get back to our base.
“Hey, that was delicious!”
“Best as always! Boss!”
“Yeah. You all better come back tomorrow.”
“Everyone, get home safely!”
“See ya.”
“Useless customers! Put the chairs back before you leave!”
“Yeees…”
Before long, most of the patrons had left Rainbow Cup, leaving the place almost deserted.
Swish. Swish.
Scrub. Scrub.
In the subdued atmosphere, the staff bustled about with brooms and mops, sweeping and wiping the floors in preparation for closing.
“Huh? Boss! Someone left a pouch here!”
“Is it a tip?”
“You think so?!”
“Of course not, you idiots♡ If you have a brain, please use it~”
“Aww, I got my hopes up for nothing.”
“Um… senior. We’re about to close. But why… why haven’t those customers left yet?”
“Hey, newbie, shut it! What if the Demon of Terror hears you? You want to have nightmares tonight?”
“Hng. Getting scolded like a dog.”
“You’re spouting dogshit, so of course you get treated like a dog. Since it’s your first day, you can head out now. Good work today! Not that you were much help~”
“Whoa… overwhelming gratitude, great senior!”
“Hey, newbie. You’re not seriously leaving just because Croma said that, are you?”
“…Overwhelming despair. The ominous feeling of failing to clock out on time…”
The little employee with floppy dog ears muttered under her breath, then suddenly whipped her head around and began glaring in my direction.
“….”
Her fierce expression reminded me of an enraged golden retriever. I slowly lowered my head, avoiding her eyes. That intense, anxiety-laden gaze was the look of someone staring down a customer who refuses to leave until closing time. In a little while, it would probably evolve into the look one gives their mortal enemy. It was clearly time to get up.
The problem was, even if I left, I had nowhere to go. Or more precisely, it wasn’t that I had nowhere to go. I simply couldn’t go.
“Nyang nyang nyang…”
“So full… ugh.”
“….”
As you can see, both our local guide and our navigator were in no condition to function. And to make matters worse, my own condition was far from normal either.
Time remaining until update completion: 07:38:58
The forced trait lock caused by the ‘Emergency! Update’ had turned me into a demon weaker than even the Doctor’s enhanced humans. Sure, even in this state I could still tear apart most ordinary opponents, but this was a world of dungeons and adventurers. A world of romance and the unknown. A fantasy world. If I ran into unknown powers like magic, curses, or divine authority, even someone as battle-hardened as me would be in for a tough fight.
In this situation, carrying a kid on one shoulder and a cat on the other while trudging through the dangerous medieval fantasy streets swarming with Sion’s rogue friends for over three hours was… not exactly an appealing option.
“Mmm… my demon…”
Pat. Pat.
Given the circumstances, the only thing this newbie demon could do was gently pat the contractor’s back as she rubbed her head against my shoulder like a cat, all while internally repeating, What the hell am I supposed to do?
Sorry for being a broke, useless demon.
But seriously, what am I supposed to do?
Would we have to sleep on the street?
“….”
I was seriously considering emptying Sion’s pockets to get us an inn when I suddenly sensed a faint presence beside me. Startled, I slowly rolled my eyes beneath my mask.
There stood a woman with neat black bobbed hair and an icy, expressionless face. It was Noir, the owner of Rainbow Cup.
Oh no. Was she already here to ask us to leave?
This is awkward.
I tried to pretend I hadn’t noticed her, hoping to buy a little more time to think, but a low, emotionless voice pierced my eardrums and ruined the attempt.
“Hmm. Should I call you the Demon of Terror? Or the Insane Demon?”
For a second I thought she was picking a fight, but judging by her complete lack of expression, it seemed like a genuine question.
“Just call me Raven. So what do you want? If you’re asking us to leave, could you give us a little more time…”
“That’s not it. I wanted to make you an offer, Raven.”
“An offer?”
We’d only known each other for less than two hours and she was already making offers… This woman was full of surprises.
“Go on.”
“It’s late. How about you stay the night here at the tavern? There happens to be one room available.”
Excuse me?
“…Is that really okay?”
“Yeah. It’s my building. There’s no reason it wouldn’t be.”
Ever since I had been summoned by my contractor and set foot in this mysterious world, I had occasionally wondered:
If there are demons in this world, doesn’t that mean angels must exist somewhere too?
I think I just found the answer.
Angel-nim?
A rainbow-colored halo scattered behind that emotionless ice statue. Ahh. So bright.
But… why would she make such a sweet offer to someone she just met? Ma’am, do you even know who I am?
“Hmm.”
Click.
My emotions instantly switched back to reason. The fluttering in my chest died down, and suspicion took its place. I was the kind of demon—no, the kind of person—who preferred clean, mutually beneficial transactions over one-sided goodwill or favors. So I asked directly.
“Is there something you want from me?”
“Yes.”
She answered without the slightest hesitation. Refreshingly honest. But what could the owner of a famous tavern possibly want from a newborn demon like me?
Is this related to Senior Croma?
Having to do another tasting or whatever would be a bit much. Or maybe she wanted me to gather ingredients from the dungeon? Hunting giant dung beetles might actually be kind of fun…
Just as I was about to spiral into wild speculation again, her calm voice pulled me back to reality.
“The truth is……”
At the end of the second-floor hallway of Rainbow Cup was a room slightly smaller than the one I shared with my contractor.
“Meat from the sea…”
“Bring it on, you weirdo… nyaaang…”
“Stop talking nonsense and go to sleep.”
I gently laid the contractor down on the bed, brushed Sion off at her feet, and then, as always, leaned against the wall near the door and lay down. That way I could react immediately if I sensed any suspicious movement outside. Normally I left this to Kkachi, but today I had no choice but to do it myself.
I miss you so much today, Kkachi. Just where did you run off to and what are you doing? Don’t tell me you went to meet some female crow? Is that it, you damn bastard? Hurry up and say something! Make some kkyu kkyu noises or whatever!
Ugh.
The more I thought about my memories with Kkachi, the more my chest ached. How was it possible to have zero good memories? This lovable idiot. This birdbrain who only knew me… Tsk.
Setting aside the unproductive trip down memory lane, I listened to the rustling sounds of my contractor and Sion on the bed and recalled the deal I had made with Noir.
—I want you to teach me the emotion of fear.
In return, you can stay here for a night whenever you want. How about it?
“…The emotion of fear.”
—My contractor has trouble expressing or feeling emotions naturally. It’s a chronic condition unique to half-elves. So I was hoping Crow Bro could help.
The clueless tavern owner seemed to think she could trade an archdemon’s power for a few free nights, but don’t worry. I’ll give you proper compensation. Oh, and keep the fact that I said this a secret from the contractor…
This isn’t going to be easy.
I had accepted the request partly because Croma had told me about the owner’s pitiful situation, and partly because I didn’t want to make my contractor sleep outside. But honestly, I wasn’t confident I could pull it off. I could probably give an ordinary person a heart attack, but I wasn’t sure I could make someone who was born unable to feel emotions experience fear.
After all, I wasn’t really the Demon of Terror. I was more like a haunted house staff member. And a top-tier ace with pretty good equipment, at that. Though right now I was just Employee A waiting for my gear to be repaired…
I really hope this emergency update or whatever goes well.
If I lost Kkachi the same way I lost access to my inventory, that would be a disaster. It would mean losing the only means I had of giving Noir fear, along with everything I had spent over a decade carefully building.
It would all collapse in an instant.
The character I had poured my blood, sweat, and tears into every single day. The proof of my existence. The stubborn traces of all the years I had endured. To have it all forcibly erased.
Just imagining it made my breath catch and my hands tremble. I was pissed. Really fucking pissed.
Time remaining until update completion: 07:11:01
There were roughly seven hours left until the update finished. At this point, the only thing I could do was offer endless praise and prayers to the Goddess. I quietly closed my eyes, praying that tomorrow morning I would be able to hear the sound of Kkachi crying.
Together with the soft breathing of a cat and a middle-schooler, the darkness grew deeper, carrying with it a growing sense of unease.
Chirp chirp!
The birds were singing. Dawn had broken.
The faint light leaking through the curtains sliced through the dust and seeped into my cornea. I didn’t need dark adaptation. I hadn’t slept in the first place.
“Hoo…”
Trembling from anxiety and distrust, I quietly counted down.
One.
Time remaining until update completion: 00:00:01
Zero.
Time remaining until update completion: 00:00:00
—Ding!
A cheerful chime jolted my mind awake, and excitement raced through my entire body.
Did the patch notes drop?!
The 'Emergency! Update' has been completed!
Please refer to the patch notes for details!
It really came?!
Why the hell is there actual patch note functionality? Even for a game-like fantasy world, isn’t this a bit too realistic?
But… what exactly changed?
The update was complete, but nothing immediately stood out as different. I’d probably have to check the patch notes to find out. However, before looking at the patch notes, there was something I needed to confirm first.
I swallowed lightly to moisten my dry throat, then carefully called out to my old friend and nemesis.
“Kkachi?”
A brief silence.
Then—
Kkyu!
A welcome cry came not from outside, but from within. The runaway Kkachi had finally returned home.
Aah! You lovable little bastard. I really missed y—
Crack!
My joy at our reunion lasted only a moment. An impact like being hit by an eight-ton truck slammed into my entire body.
“…!?”
Crrrrack!!!
My bones shattered. My muscles and organs twisted together. Unable to endure the pain of my muscles being compressed, I silently collapsed to the floor.
You’ve got to be fucking kidding me.
—Sizzle. Thump. Thump.
The sound of spinal fluid flowing and my heart pounding violently scraped against my eardrums without pause.
—Screeeech…
Every time my muscles pulled or my joints moved, a sound like the world itself screaming assaulted my ears.
“Glurk……”
Something fishy and squishy kept rising up my throat, but I clenched my teeth, swallowed it back down, and endured. If I puked inside the mask, I’d be completely fucked. Cleaning it is a goddamn nightmare!
Kkachi. Block the pain. Kkachi… please…
Kkyu kkyu! Forget the kkyu kkyu, just listen to my damn orders, you worthless thing!
Despite my desperate pleas, Kkachi refused to take away the pain until the very end. Damn bastard. Just you wait.
—Crunch. Crrrrunch!
I was painfully aware that I was still alive. If I were dead, it wouldn’t hurt this much.
“Khhhk……”
I couldn’t even scream for fear of worrying the kids. I tensed every muscle in my body to endure, and my vision kept blurring and clearing in turns. Then, at some point—
Thump!
Thump—
My heartbeat vanished.
The pain that had been twisting my entire body like a pretzel disappeared. All the signs of life inside me cut off, and a silence like restful sleep descended.
Ah. Did I finally die?
No. I was still alive.
Everything in front of me was terrifyingly clear. I could even see the floating dust in the air and the smudges on the lens. Everything.
By the way… had I been breathing this whole time?
“Huuuuaaaaah!”
The instinctive realization hit me like an epiphany, and I took a deep breath.
But something was wrong.
When you breathe in, your chest should rise. There was no sign of that. And the breath just kept going! It felt like I had turned into a vacuum cleaner.
Sssssssip!
The more I inhaled, the more I felt some unknown energy steadily accumulating in my chest. A dual sensation that felt both cool and hot at the same time. Before I knew it, I was completely captivated by it and kept breathing in deeper and deeper.
Ssssssssssip……
The larger the energy grew in my chest, the more my senses expanded and a godlike sense of omnipotence overflowed. A baseless confidence that made me feel like I could do anything. And along with it, an unknown urge began to boil up inside me.
The impulse to thrust my hand into my chest and rip something out kept urging me on. It was a completely insane idea… but I suddenly wanted to try it right away!
And I’m the type of person who does what he wants the moment he wants it.
Like this.
—Shunk!
My pitch-black, razor-sharp fingertips plunged into my chest without hesitation.
But there was no pain. No bleeding. No sound of ribs shattering. It simply sank in smoothly, like falling into a black swamp.
When my hand was halfway in—
—Tap.
Something hard and long touched my fingers. I hooked my index finger like a claw, grabbed it, and pulled it out.
—Sluuuuurp!
With a familiar grip, a long black object slid smoothly out of my chest. A long, dark barrel. A cylindrical cylinder. A handgrip wrapped in my palm. I could feel its weight and coldness.
This was…
“A revolver?”
My prime… had it returned?
But… why the hell did it come out of my chest…?