An Inevitable Choice

This was an inevitable choice. After having my pussy touched by Seo Ye-eun in the cram school bathroom under the pretext of "treatment," my life had turned a full 180 degrees.

"Ugh…."

For starters, the treatment Seo Ye-eun had given me was undeniably effective. The itching had definitely subsided afterward, and the heavy, listless feeling in my body had improved too.

But it seemed this wasn't something that could be fully resolved with just one session. As time passed, my body started heating up again.

I tried buying and eating foods that were supposed to be good for the body, and even picked up some vitamin supplements touted as miracle cures for women's issues, but nothing worked.

There was only one way to fix these symptoms.

Just like Seo Ye-eun had done—stroking my pussy with her fingers.

- Swish, swish, squish…!

"Hngh…! Why… why won't this… work…!"

Today, too, I slipped into the bathroom, slathered some feminine wash on my hand, and started rubbing my pussy as hard as I could.

I pressed firmly on the outer lips and rubbed, then parted them slightly with my fingers to tap at the little bean inside.

I even kneaded my breasts with my other hand and pinched my nipples.

"Ugh, ah… That feeling just… isn't coming… Why?"

I couldn't feel that sensation she'd given me back then.

Something dull would well up from below, and pinching my nipples sent little jolts through me, but that was it.

Far from the electric pleasure she'd delivered, all I got was the stinging friction on my skin and an awkward, clumsy sensation that only grew worse the more I tried.

"Why… won't it work?"

In my impatience, I sped up my fingers. I pressed hard like she had, twisted them like a pinch.

But that only ramped up the unpleasant pain, with no sign of that explosive white-hot stimulation that used to blank my mind.

In the end, I yanked my hand away in frustration and let out a deep sigh.

"Haa… I'm going fucking insane."

I didn't want to admit it, but I had no choice.

I couldn't do it with my own hands.

My clumsy touch couldn't satisfy this body that Seo Ye-eun had already tamed.

So what now? Was I doomed to live the rest of my life with this unquenchable need?

I kept agonizing over my useless body that couldn't solve a damn thing on its own.

Should I ask family?

Family? No way in ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠hell.

If I told Mom my crotch was itching and begged her to touch it, I'd get more than a smack on the back—it'd be game over.

Asking family for something like that was ethically insane to begin with.

Then… friends?

Faces of the guys I'd been tight with in high school flashed in my mind.

But the instant I imagined them peering between my legs and groping me, revulsion and nausea surged up.

No matter how much my outside had turned female, I was still a guy inside.

A man's touch—especially from those dudes I'd hung out with—made my skin crawl just thinking about it.

What about… toys?

I'd considered that too. When my hands couldn't deliver, I'd scoured adult toy sites for something suitable.

But one look at the dildos, vibrators, and all sorts of gadgets killed the idea dead.

"Th-that's just…."

I could barely handle a single finger yet—there was no way I could take those massive, rigid plastic monstrosities.

More than that, the thought of masturbating with machines made my body reject it outright.

What I needed wasn't cold mechanical vibes, but the warmth of someone who knew my body and could soothe it.

By process of elimination, only one option remained.

Someone who knew my body had turned female.

Someone who seemed to understand its structure and state better than I did.

And someone who'd already proven she could treat it effectively.

"…Seo Ye-eun."

The moment those three syllables left my lips, my heart plummeted.

Ask that crazy bitch again? This was like walking into the tiger's den and spreading my legs, begging to be devoured.

But there were no other options.

If I didn't, I'd be tossing and turning all night in agony—not to mention dragging this itch and heavy ache through every damn day.

Maybe it was better to swallow my pride and get a proper, satisfying treatment one more time.

Anyway, I need to study… I can't focus like this. It's all for the CSAT.

I started rationalizing with the lamest excuses.

Conditioning was life-or-death for a retaker like me.

If I didn't fix this, I wouldn't concentrate tomorrow or the day after.

Yeah, this was unavoidable.

With trembling hands, I opened my phone's contacts.

My thumb hovered over [Seo Ye-eun] for ages before finally hitting call.

- Riiing, riiing….

The signal barely rang a few times before a familiar clatter and voice burst through, like she'd been waiting.

That leisurely, silky voice. But underneath lurked a glee that said she already knew everything.

She'd nailed it—I was speechless.

In a situation like this, silence was as good as yes.

I could picture her lips curling into a smirk through the receiver.

I licked my dry lips and barely squeezed out the words.

"Could you… help ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠me again? I can't do it alone…. I'd really appreciate it if you could."

Asking Seo Ye-eun for help.

It felt like my pride had hit rock bottom and drilled straight through to the basement.

But to banish the thick, throbbing ache tormenting my groin right now, I could've sold my soul to the devil.

At my desperate reply, Ye-eun paused, then dropped a bombshell I never saw coming.

I yelped in shock.

Skipping cram school was unthinkable for a retaker.

Our fate was to go insane from anxiety if we missed even a day of studying.

I wasn't that obsessed with studying, but I ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠wasn't some delinquent ditching at will either.

Unlike Seo Ye-eun, maybe.

"No, even if I skip… what do I tell the teachers?"

Ye-eun rattled off a plan with the confidence of someone reading from a script.

Hearing it laid out, it sounded plausible enough.

Given my unique situation—guy to girl just recently—even a flimsy excuse would slide with the teachers.

And mentioning that topic? No teacher would pry, even with a normal girl.

Classic Seo Ye-eun, the delinquent queen—devious as hell.

At this point, suspicion crept in.

"Have you… done this a lot? Why's it so detailed?"

Her laughter sent a chill down my spine, but my resolve was already tipping toward her offer.

Sitting through classes with this nagging itch versus getting treated at her place.

My starving body couldn't resist that sweet temptation.

In the end, I squeezed my eyes shut and surrendered.

"Okay…. I'll come tomorrow."

She had a point—Hye-won there might make it okay.

If Ye-eun went overboard, level-headed Hye-won could rein her in.

Showing Hye-won this side of me was mortifying, but leaving myself solely in Ye-eun's hands felt riskier.

Yeah, we're all girls.

Just pretend she's a nurse standing by.

"Sure. That sounds good…."

- Click.

With that, Seo Ye-eun hung up.

Staring at the call screen on my phone, I flopped onto the bed.

"Haa… I must be fucking crazy."

Skipping cram school to hang at a friend's house—no, not hanging, begging her to touch my privates.

As a retaker—no, as a human—I'd hit the absolute bottom.

Whew… No. This is for studying. I can't focus with my body like this…. Just one more treatment, then done.

Yeah, this wasn't rebellion—it was conditioning.

A brief break for CSAT success.

I brainwashed myself like that and got up.

Guilt stabbed my chest, but oddly, my heart was pounding fast.

Fear? Partly.

But my instincts whispered something else.

This was anticipation.

The thrill of wishing tomorrow would hurry up.

"Whatever… I'll sleep on it and think tomorrow."

I sighed and headed to bed.

With no clue what tomorrow would bring.