Why Mosquito Repellent Is Serious Business

I had planned to score some easy affection points with Irene, a bona fide main character, by offering her a piece of candy. Naturally, my companions had to go and ruin everything.

Tsk. And it was such a golden opportunity, too.

I was disappointed in Isabelle and Mister Son Ocheon, but after hearing Giselle’s explanation, I had to admit he had a point.

“If one consumes sweets without brushing afterward, tooth decay inevitably follows,” Giselle said reasonably. “Eating confections outdoors is rather problematic in that regard.”

“Ah! But I’ve been stuffing my face with them!”

“Indeed. I was wondering when the right time to offer this would be. Here—a spare toothbrush I had prepared for later use.”

Looking out for my dental hygiene on top of ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠everything else? Giselle really was the best!

“While we are at it, let us reapply the insect repellent as well.”

“Okaay~”

“By the way, why do you despise mosquitoes to such an extent? Is it simply because the bites itch?”

Perhaps because I seized every possible moment to broadcast my absolute hatred of mosquitoes, Giselle asked with genuine curiosity.

“You’ll find out very soon!”

The time to demonstrate the life-or-death importance of bug spray had finally arrived.

To be precise, it was at the final three-way fork leading directly to the finish line of the second checkpoint.

Proctor Minerva turned to face the examinees who had managed to follow her this far.

“Good work keeping up across such a long distance!”

“Whoa! Is this the goal line?”

“No. I just said you worked hard.”

“???”

“This instructor is heading out first. Feel free to take whichever path you fancy.”

Beep.

Minerva stepped onto the magic circle entirely by herself.

With a crisp sound, the proctor vanished into thin air via spatial teleportation. The students, who had naively assumed that tailing her would lead them straight across the finish line, were blindsided with an absolute masterclass in betrayal.

“Wait, are you serious? For real? Legit?!”

“She just ditched us like that?!”

“You rotten hag! You absolute piece of trash!”

“Ha... Hahaha...”

“Wait, you mean we actually need points here?!”

The examinees broke down into a spectrum of despair: some collapsed into confusion, some erupted in rage, and others simply snapped, laughing hysterically at the sky.

Right at that moment, a thick chunk of bark fell from the trunk of the massive tree standing in the center of the fork.

“Whoa, what the?!”

“Huh? A light?”

“Wait, that’s not a tree!”

It was a roadside outpost disguised as timber. From within, an instructor wearing a green cap poked his head out.

“If you’ve got points, I’ve got mosquito balm! Put this on and the bites won't hurt at all! The portion’s small, but surely that beats scratching yourself to death, right?”

“Do you have bug spray? Repellent?!”

“Huh? If I sold repellent, how on earth would I sell the balm? Of course I don’t stock that! What are you, an idiot? Hahaha!”

“……”

Fists trembled in collective, impotent fury. Every single proctor and instructor in this academy was infuriating to the bone!

“Wait a minute... Can’t we just use that magic circle?”

“Oh, right. We all have over sixty points anyway.”

The minimum passing score was fifty points, and the transit fee was ten. As long as you possessed over sixty points in total, there was no need to take the grueling detour or risk wading through a cloud of mosquitoes on the free shortcut.

“What’s the big deal about a few bugs anyway?! Let’s just blaze through the shortcut!”

“Exactly! We’re candidates aiming for the premier academy in the world!”

A few examinees marched into the free shortcut with boundless confidence.

Barely ten minutes later, they staggered back out, caked in mud, their eyes hollowed out as though they had peered directly into the abyss.

“I-It’s hell... That place is pure hell!”

“The mosquitoes... There were thousands of them!!”

“You’ll die! If you go in there, they’ll suck every drop of your blood dry and leave a husk!!”

“Good grief!”

“How could such a vile place exist?!”

The sheer density of the swarm made the mosquito marsh from the earlier side quest look like a child’s playground.

“So you avoided getting bitten because of this?” Giselle murmured. “Because being covered in bites prevents one from passing through?”

“Nope, not quite,” I replied cheerfully. “Look over there.”

Fresh from hunting down extra points, the trigger-happy pirate girl Jigoku arrived on the scene. With an arrogant smirk plastered across her face, she stepped onto the ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠magic circle.

“If you hate bugs so much, just pay for the circle, you losers. Hehehe. Are you all completely brain-dead?”

Full of swagger, Jigoku thrust her ticket watch toward the mana board beside the platform. What greeted her, however, was not the luminous blue flash of spatial transit.

“!!”

It was a set of terms and conditions dripping with malicious intent, crafted solely to bleed the examinees of their hard-earned points!

“Isn’t ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠that the foul-mouthed redhead from before?” Son Ocheon barked with laughter. “Bwahaha! Look at her, making an absolute clown of herself! Pure comedy!”

Mortified, Jigoku flushed crimson to the roots of her hair.

“Uncle Ocheon, you’re laughing too loud,” I whispered.

“Gwahaha! How could a man hold back after seeing that?”

I half expected Jigoku to pull her revolvers and open fire on the spot, but the moment she spotted me standing next to Son Ocheon, she choked down the boiling fury threatening to blow the top of her skull off.

“You filthy monkey,” she spat between clenched teeth. “Let’s settle this later. Somewhere without the runt.”

“Anytime, pal.”

Giselle made no effort to mask his bewilderment.

“I have heard of restricting teleportation for patients suffering from sword lacerations or gunshot wounds, lest spatial displacement aggravate their internal trauma,” he observed. “Yet this is the very first time I have ever witnessed transit being denied on account of mosquito venom.”

“Even Uncle Giselle has blind spots, huh?” I chirped. “If you jump through space while poisoned, the spatial compression accelerates the spread of toxins right after arrival. Not that mosquito venom is actually that dangerous, of course.”

It was simply a tailored educational preview designed for prospective students. The academy wasn't doing this purely to tilt everyone off the face of the earth—well, mostly not.

“Shall we get going, then?”

“Hey, you guys!” one of the bystanders shouted. “Didn’t you see what just happened?! If you’ve been bitten, it won’t let you through!”

“Oh, don’t worry about us. We haven’t been bitten at all!”

That’s why you should’ve put in the effort to avoid getting bitten in the first place, noobs.

Our party warped effortlessly to the finish line.

Waiting on the other side, Minerva greeted us with an appreciative glimmer in her eye.

“Impressive work. Navigating that forest without suffering a single mosquito bite is no small feat.”

“We could have simply purchased bug medicine, you know,” I remarked.

“Do you take me for a novice ranger incapable of scenting medicated balm? I know full well you bought nothing from that merchant. You relied on repellent spray instead, didn’t you?”

Isabelle gasped in genuine admiration. “So she really is a proctor after all.”

“What on earth did you think I was?” Minerva snorted. “Regardless, congratulations. You pass.”

“Hooray!”

Giselle glanced down at his ticket watch, his brow furrowing in confusion.

“Pardon me, but why have our scores increased?”

Despite spending ten points on the teleportation toll, everyone’s score had jumped by fifty.

“Completion reward,” Minerva answered dryly. “The second checkpoint awards fifty bonus points to anyone who crosses the finish line within the time limit.”

“Then what purpose did the secondary objectives serve?”

“So you could buy mosquito balm, perhaps?”

“……”

“A jest. Ease your tension, examinees,” Minerva said with a faint smirk. “Your party’s balance was exceptional, so you likely remained unaware, but this second stage created high demand for various necessities—rations, potable water, wilderness survival kits, and more.”

She was referring to the pop-up supply posts scattered along the course. Typically, examinees burned through a portion of the points they accrued from secondary tasks at those exact shops. Of course, the vast majority ended up completely cleaned out by the final mosquito balm stand just so they could use the teleportation pad.

“During protracted expeditions, dismissing minor damage like insect bites is a fatal mistake,” Minerva lectured, her tone solemn. “Like light drizzle soaking through clothes, neglect depletes stamina and exposes one to debilitating sickness. I trust this checkpoint imparted upon all of you the critical importance of pest control.”

Giselle, Son Ocheon, and Isabelle nodded along, their expressions reflecting newfound respect—realizing that, eccentricities aside, the woman before them truly was a seasoned educator.

Naturally, I had known every single detail from the start.

Catching onto my utterly unperturbed demeanor, Minerva ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠suddenly turned her gaze upon me.

“Did examinee Orknodi anticipate this beforehand?”

“Of course! One must always maintain thorough countermeasures against poisoning!”

A heavy, complex silence settled over my companions.

“...Could that so-called gifted education have actually been effective?” Giselle muttered under his breath.

“Good grief,” Son Ocheon rumbled. “Can someone really turn out like that from it?”

“Poison candy conditioning, was it...?” Isabelle whispered, her eyes wide with grim contemplation. “Perhaps our adventurer guild should implement...”

Leaving my teammates to their solemn, misunderstanding-fueled reflection session, I slipped away under the pretext of needing the restroom.

After activating Detection to verify that nobody had trailed behind me, I let out a satisfied giggle and pulled a spare pouch from inside my coat. Distinct from my candy sack, this pouch harbored three precious treasures: Stat Stones.

“Hehehe.”

This was the sole reason I had gone out of my way to clear those optional secondary objectives. In any game, you can never have enough Stat Stones!

Ingesting a Stat Stone didn’t automatically grant free stats across the board. Certain stones ceased offering benefits once a stat reached twenty, while higher-tier stones yielded vastly superior efficiency if saved for later thresholds.

In the early game, popping them right away is fine, but once you have some leeway, min-maxing dictates that you hoard the good stuff!

For that very reason, I had stashed away the stones that were a bit too chunky to swallow in one gulp without drawing attention. This pouch was my secret emergency savings account, waiting for the perfect moment to be devoured in private.

“Collecting pebbles, are we? You seemed so unnervingly precocious, yet you still have your childish moments.”

“?!”

Startled out of my skin, I snatched the pouch shut and sprang backward. My eyes locked onto an instructor clad in a black cap perched on a thick branch overhead, looking down at me with an unblinking gaze.

It was a familiar summoned by Minerva, channeling her voice through the combined magic of Shared Sight and Voice Transmission. To think someone could slip past my Detection and track me so flawlessly—the chill that ran down my spine was instantaneous.

“I have encountered candidates like you before,” the familiar spoke with Minerva's stern cadence.

“Someone else hoards stones like me?!”

“...Not that part,” the proctor answered, her tone flat. “I speak of the poison conditioning.”

Using the familiar’s vocal cords, Minerva continued her measured interrogation.

“I began investigating after noticing an influx of similar examinees over the years. On the surface, it claims to sponsor gifted youths seeking admission into Gift Academy... yet beneath the facade lies an organization raising trained operatives to infiltrate our ranks.”

The summoned creature leaned forward, its gaze boring into me.

“Examinee Orknodi. You are a scholarship recipient sponsored by the Weihimhai Foundation, are you not?”