I Never Said Any of That
"What the hell is this nonsense?"
"You're telling me."
Watching the board thrash about under a tide of completely unhinged conspiracy theories, I felt my sanity quietly pack its bags and ascend into the stratosphere.
Of course, the daze only lasted a moment.
"Commander, snap out of it and start assessing the situation first."
"R-right. You're right."
Jessica, standing beside me, shook my shoulder until my brain rebooted. I managed to claw my mental state back into something resembling functionality and set about figuring out what on earth was going on.
I never said any of that, you bastards.
And after diligently gathering every scrap of information I could find and digging into the details—
My sense of absurdity, which had only just begun its descent from orbit, fired a second-stage booster rocket and punched straight back through the atmosphere.
Never mind the random gallery posts. Why were people losing their minds over words I had never even spoken?
Have they all lost it?
And even while I was still looking into it, the bubble of the rumor kept swelling larger and larger.
[Image: A Kingdom Ablaze in Chaos.jpg]
1. At first, Icarus said absolutely nothing about users forming clans.
2. So people saw the Erosance Clan exist and figured, hey, we can make one too — and they just started making them.
3. But at some point while they were doing that, a rumor started circulating that if you make a clan, Icarus will assign you territory.
4. Then the argument shifted to what "assigning territory" even means, exactly.
5. From there it evolved into: he's going to make each base's village chief into a clan leader, spin them off as independent clans, let those users build up clan-leader experience—
6. —and then gather all those experienced users to found a mega-clan with Icarus at the center. That's the theory currently making the rounds.
One-line summary = He said he wouldn't make an Icarus Clan, but isn't this just him preparing to make one? Central Zone is absolutely losing its mind.
All manner of fabricated rumors were being spun out and spread like this, and every last one of them was doing a number on my mental health.
Naturally, as this internal controversy erupted in every direction, other players were just as baffled by the whole spectacle.
[Image: A toad staring in pure contempt]
Making every base's village chief into a clan leader and spinning them off as independent, blah blah—
There's even a rumor going around that Icarus is going to take Tannhauser and share the Leviathan Fleet with every clan.
Bro. Isn't all of that just Icarus's stuff? Lmao
He can do whatever he wants with it. Why are they all telling him what he should and shouldn't do? Lmao
Naturally, players from other zones who were already familiar with the clan system couldn't make heads or tails of the Central Zone's collective meltdown. Others were convinced I was finally ready to form a clan and told everyone to drop the roleplay already. Different directions, same chaos.
And on top of all that…