The Maid's Insight
After finishing dinner, Ariel—who had ordered Shuri to bring tea—flopped onto the bed like a dried fish dangling from a string. When Shuri returned to the room and saw her, a soft smile touched her lips. It was one of Ariel’s occasional displays: when she was in that state, it meant she truly lacked the strength to lift even a finger. Shuri knew better than anyone that the best course was to avoid disturbing her mistress’s mood, quietly prepare only what was needed, and then withdraw.
“Shuri, prepare some for yourself as well.”
“Pardon? For myself…?”
Shuri, who had been arranging teacups and refreshments on the table, voiced her confusion at the sudden command. The implication was clear: her mistress wished to share teatime together. Yet from everything Shuri had observed, Ariel was far stricter about the boundaries between master and servant than one might expect. While she often conversed with those beneath her, she had almost never invited them to share tea or a meal. Startled, Shuri blinked at Ariel before offering a gentle smile and nodding without a word. She had a fair idea of what her mistress was thinking.
“Come now, my lady. You must get up before the tea grows cold.”
“Ugh… I asked for it myself, so it would be a waste not to drink it. Fine, I suppose.”
Clearly reluctant to rise, Ariel rolled from side to side on the bed before finally pushing herself up and trudging over to the table with heavy steps. She sank into a chair.
“What are you doing? Sit down already.”
“Ah, yes.”
Shuri stood frozen beside the table, uncertain whether she was truly allowed to sit with her mistress. Growing impatient, Ariel clicked her tongue and jerked her chin toward the seat across from her.
“What kind of tea leaves are these? They’re quite good.”
“They’re called dahlia leaves. They’re a recent arrival, and I’ve heard they’ve been well received.”
“Really? Hmm…”
Ariel wasn’t particularly fond of tea, but she did enjoy leaves that suited her palate. Among all the varieties she had tried, these were especially pleasant—bright and refreshing, with a distinctive tartness that lingered like fruit.
“Prepare these from now on. Do we have more?”
“Yes, plenty.”
“Good.”
Even if they ran out, the Robeheim family’s connections could secure any rare leaves she desired. Ariel had never wanted for anything she truly craved—save for one single exception.
“Why aren’t you saying anything?”
“What do you mean, my lady?”
“We’re just sitting here in silence. Isn’t it a servant’s duty to start the conversation at times like this?”
It was the very image of the tyrant Edgar had acknowledged. She had summoned her servant under the pretense of having something to say, only to grow too nervous to speak and shift the blame onto Shuri instead. Yet Shuri showed no sign of surprise. She simply apologized and carefully opened her mouth.
“Then, if I may be so bold, would it be all right for me to speak first?”
“Do you have something you want to say?”
“Not exactly. It’s just that I think I have some idea of what you wish to discuss.”
“……”
Having watched Ariel longer than anyone except her family and Edgar, Shuri prided herself on understanding her mistress reasonably well. For Ariel—who was usually rather high-handed and curt with servants—to initiate this meeting herself could only mean she was reaching for help, however reluctantly. Considering the most recent events in Ariel’s life, the answer was obvious. Whether she would voice it was another matter entirely.
“I was just a little curious about you and Ronan. I’ve asked before, but back then I wasn’t being honest with myself…”
“Back then… you mean?”
“W-what’s with that tone?”
Ariel looked flustered at the way Shuri’s words seemed to ask, Does that mean you’re being honest now? From Shuri’s perspective, however, the reaction was only natural. Back then Ariel had denied even the fact that she “liked” Edgar; now she seemed to be saying, I like him, but not enough to confess. In Shuri’s eyes, Ariel’s attitude toward Edgar hadn’t changed much at all. And yet she spoke as though she had suddenly become honest—how could Shuri possibly look at her kindly?
“My lady, do you wish to be in love, or do you wish to win?”
“I-I don’t know! I’ve never done this before…”
“Ah.”
Right. That was true. Shuri let out a sigh, realizing her own mistake. The girl she served was, after all, merely an eighteen-year-old experiencing her first love. She had simply been forced to mature and hone her abilities earlier than her peers—a perfectly ordinary girl in that regard. Her understanding of love came only from books, records, or whispered stories from others. It was only natural that she felt anxious about how to handle these unfamiliar emotions. Especially since this was something theory alone could never teach her, unlike magic or politics.
Thinking of it that way, she seems terribly endearing.
Shuri had always known her mistress was quite cute, but realizing that every action stemmed from pure innocence made her seem even more adorable.
“I don’t know how you’ll feel about this, my lady, but Ronan and I didn’t fall for each other in an instant, nor did we start dating right away.”
“Really? I thought you just ended up together because you were childhood friends.”
“Of course, being childhood friends and seeing each other often helped us recognize our feelings… but at first, I was confused too.”
If they had met while already conscious of each other as members of the opposite sex, things might have been different. But Shuri and Ronan had never been introduced through a formal meeting or by a third party. They had simply been childhood playmates who held hands as children. That was why Shuri had felt lost when she first began to see Ronan in a romantic light and felt her heart flutter. If Ronan had been someone she could have cut ties with after a single confession, she might have been bolder. But to Shuri, Ronan was an irreplaceable friend—and that very fact had become her greatest obstacle. What if his feelings weren’t the same? What would become of their relationship if he rejected her? The thought of losing even his friendship was something she couldn’t bear to imagine.
“So I understand how you feel, my lady. Even after I realized Ronan had feelings for me, I hesitated.”
“You… did?”
“Of course. I’m not inside his head. No matter how much I guessed, I couldn’t be certain.”
There was always the possibility of being wrong. That single phrase perfectly captured both Shuri’s feelings back then and Ariel’s now. He must like me, right? He must see me as a woman, right? Such thoughts would swirl in her mind, yet the moment she tried to reach out, doubt would creep in. What if I’m wrong? What if this relationship crumbles because of my misunderstanding? That was why love was so difficult. Until one of them confessed their true feelings, they would inevitably remain locked in a standoff, neither understanding the other. And it wasn’t anyone’s fault. It was simply the bittersweet consequence of two people cherishing each other too much.
“You said it yourself, my lady. Confessing to the young master first would feel like losing.”
“Y-yeah… I did.”
“But is that truly how you feel? To me, it seems like nothing more than another way to avoid the issue.”
At her servant’s sharp remark, Ariel’s body jerked. It was something she had never voiced to anyone—not even to herself. Hearing it spoken aloud by Shuri made her chest ache as though something inside had torn.
“…How did you know?”
“I told you. I’ve been through something similar.”
The Shuri of the past and the Ariel of the present were remarkably alike. The only difference was that Ariel had continued deceiving even herself, while Shuri had resolved to be honest with her own heart.
“You were simply afraid, my lady. You believed the young master liked you, yet without certainty, you hesitated.”
“…Anyone would think you’d read my mind.”
“I’ve been watching you for a long time, even if not that long in the grand scheme of things. One comes to understand at least this much, whether they want to or not.”
At least, that was the Ariel Robeheim Shuri had always known. She could be dishonest at times, and she would never do anything that wounded her pride. But above all else, her possessiveness surpassed anyone else’s. For such a girl to be unable to approach the one man she had never possessed and wanted more than anything—simply because of pride? Shuri could only tilt her head in disbelief.
“That must be why you were so happy when you realized the young master had some feelings for you.”
“……”
Ariel nodded faintly without answering. Shuri was right. As always, she had simply relied on Edgar’s kindness. She had believed he would come to her first this time as well. Rather than reaching out and trembling with anxiety, it was safer to wait for him. In other words, instead of hoping for progress based on an uncertain future, she had chosen to wait for a future that felt more certain, even if it took longer. Whether Edgar truly loved her as a woman remained uncertain, but her own love for him as a man was clear. If he came to her first and whispered his love, that would be the happiest ending she could imagine.
“That must also be why you didn’t tell the young master the truth about the candy today.”
“Ah, you knew?”
“My lady, sometimes I think you see me as quite the fool. I may be a little slow at times, but…”
Shuri puffed her cheeks slightly, looking unusually sulky. It was an absurd notion to begin with. If Ariel’s true feelings kept spilling out against her will, anyone who knew her would never have believed otherwise. Anyone could see it was simply the lie of an inexperienced girl telling herself, Not yet.
Perhaps…
Shuri let out a soft, deflated laugh as a certain man’s face came to mind. If it was him—someone who understood Ariel even better than she did—then it was entirely possible.
“I’ll clear the cups and dishes and come back. You still have more to say, don’t you?”
“Yeah.”
Well, one night probably won’t be enough. Understanding her mistress’s feelings, Shuri nodded and loaded the empty cups and plates onto the trolley before leaving the room. She would listen to every word from her unusually adorable mistress tonight. With that thought, she opened the door—only to freeze.
“Ah.”
“Uh… hello?”
Standing before her, looking slightly awkward, was the very man they had just been discussing, his hand raised in a hesitant wave.
“Pfft.”
Unable to hold back her laughter, Shuri covered her mouth, then pointed inside the room and spoke to Edgar.
“My lady is inside. Why don’t you go in?”
“Without permission? Will that be all right?”
“Then consider it the maid’s unilateral decision. I’ll take the blame.”
“…Thanks, Shuri.”
At his gratitude, Shuri gave a small bow and wheeled the trolley out of the room. From Ariel’s position, the hallway was out of sight, so she likely hadn’t seen Edgar yet. The moment he stepped inside, a scream—or at the very least, a commotion—would surely erupt.
You can do it, my lady.
Without so much as a glance back, Shuri reached behind her and quietly closed the door, then walked down the corridor with her usual straight posture, silently cheering for her mistress.