All the Mountains Turn Green, Green - 2
Do-dam took hold of my hand and led me to an industrial complex on the outskirts of Guro-gu, Seoul. The moment we emerged from the subway station, a row of lonely gray buildings greeted us.
“Here!”
“....”
I looked around.
The place had the atmosphere of a world that had stopped somewhere around ten years ago. Even for someone like me, whose memories of anything from several years back had grown hazy through regression, it still felt old enough to make that impression.
“....”
Aside from the shops that were always here, most of the others must have shut down and left pretty quickly. With nobody new coming in, the old atmosphere just kept hanging on.
The “For Rent” signs pasted to the walls,
the silence that had settled over everything….
It was the textbook image of a dead commercial district.
Of all times, it had to be a weekday morning, so there were even fewer people around. And this is where they built an e-sports arena?
In the echo of that old decay, Do-dam looked like she was finding memories instead of ruins. Still holding my hand, she pointed this way and that.
“It’s been forever since I came here…. It’s still exactly the same. The cellphone shop over there still has a ten-year-old idol poster up, which is honestly creepy. It was there the first time I came.”
“I see.”
“See that gukbap place up ahead? I ate there with the priest. It really hasn’t changed at all. Oh, but the price tag says the gukbap went up. Why would it, when there aren’t even any people here?”
“....”
I looked over.
Beneath the gukbap shop sign, the large price board had crudely been updated, its first digit bumped upward. It was the only thing that had changed, keeping pace with prices that rose without end.
I answered, “In a capitalist society, inflation is the only thing that’s truly equal.”
“Th-that’s a little… I don’t know, that’s kind of messed up.”
“The moment cash stops moving, its value naturally falls. If you don’t build things so that wealth multiplies in step with rising prices, then inflation will always….”
“Kyaaa! No more economics lectures! Let’s just go to the place we actually came for! I remember everything, so don’t worry, na-na-na.”
“....Understood.”
And then she led me onward.
“This way!”
“....”
“Hm? Commander, you’re not coming?”
Her small, warm palm tugged at my hand.
Tap, tap.
But then I said quietly, “Do-dam.”
“Hm? What?”
“Is this all right?”
“What is?”
I raised our joined hands.
“This.”
“?”
Do-dam tilted her head.
Her palm was still warm against mine. She had gripped me so tightly it was like a hook; if I hadn’t pulled away, there was no way it would have come loose.
I’d been trying to slip my hand away bit by bit on the subway so nobody would notice, but she’s been holding on this tightly the whole time….
While I was thinking that,
silence fell for a moment.
It was enough time to understand the situation.
“....”
“....”
As time passed, Do-dam’s face slowly turned red too. It was like someone had pressed a brush soaked in red paint against a blank white sheet until the color seeped through.
She stammered, “W-when… when did I start holding on…?”
“From the convenience store onward. Over thirty minutes, by the clock.”
“....”
At last she let go, carefully. Then she rubbed at her own hand and lowered her head a little. Her earlobes and cheeks were still red.
“S-sorry. I got so excited thinking about coming here that I did that.”
“There’s nothing to apologize for. I was only concerned you might end up in an awkward situation.”
“Awkward…. Yeah, if somebody noticed, then I guess that could happen.”
“Right.”
“No, I don’t mean it’d be awkward for you, Commander, I mean….”
“?”
“Nope, nothing. I’m not saying.”
“Yes, understood.”
Do-dam shook her head hard. Her face, which had been red a moment ago, turned a little pale. Then, as if trying to hide the embarrassment, she forced herself back up to the energy she’d had before.
“O-okay then, let’s gooo!”
“....”
We walked down the quiet street with heavy steps.
Ten minutes later, after crossing that concrete desert, a large commercial building appeared in front of us.
“That’s the place.”
“....”
A huge, rectangular, three-story building.
Each floor seemed to have about a hundred pyeong of space, and with that simple design, its scale stood out sharply. If this had been in a lively commercial district in Seoul, it would have been worth several billion won at least.
“....”
Hypothetically, anyway.
But unfortunately,
the building born from a dead commercial district was steeped only in stillness. The restaurants and shops had their lights off, and only the red sign on the third floor managed to assert its miserable little presence.
High Fence Stadium
Looking at the sign, I muttered without thinking, “High Fence Stadium….”
“Yeah, this is it.”
Do-dam spoke with deep feeling.
“I told you I went to a youth tournament before, right?”
“Yes.”
“This was the venue.”
“I see.”
“Back then, it looked so dazzling. Grown-ups were crowding in to watch, too… but now it’s so shabby.”
“....”
She chuckled.
For some reason, it sounded more like derision than amusement.
“It’s just like my life.”
“....”
“The difference is, my life was shabby from the start.”
“....”
But the sneer shifted into a declaration.
“So I want to conquer it at least once.”
“Pardon?”
“Let’s go upstairs. I looked it up online, and apparently because business is bad, they rent it out to people and all kinds of stuff. Like a memorization contest at a senior center….”
“....”
We went up to the third floor.
Faded red decor.
A dusty, worn-out entrance that looked like an old PC bang welcomed us. The stadium lobby was packed with posters from online games that had come out ten years ago.
Do-dam let out an exclamation.
“Wow, it’s full of boomer games.”
“....”
“But it’s fun. This is what you’d call gukbap for gamers.”
“....”
And, surprisingly enough,
there was a staff member stationed at the entrance. A middle-aged man with a muddled expression stood up and came toward us.
“Ah, did the two of you come for the interview too? I’ve opened it up inside, so feel free to look around. Reporter Nam stepped out to use the restroom for a moment.”
“?”
“?”
Reporter Nam?
I looked at Do-dam. For some reason, the instant she’d seen the staff member, she had scuttled behind me.
Did she bring me here under the guise of an interview?
But she shook her head.
So hard her bobbed hair swayed.
“Nope. Nope. Nope. Don’t know. Don’t know. Don’t know.”
“....”
So I answered the staff member, “We’re not here for an interview. We just came to look around. I don’t even know that person.”
“Ah, I see.”
Nodding, he turned and trudged back to his seat, where he started playing a game on his phone.
“Then, well… take your time and look around.”
“....”
“....”
The atmosphere was almost absurdly casual.
Honestly, it looked like they wouldn’t care what we did inside. It seemed he’d come out because of a filming appointment, even though today wasn’t even a day they were scheduled to open.
Still hidden behind me, Do-dam whispered, “Okay, go go. Sun-gung is Na-eun. I’ll call the shots and hit them with Q-basic-E-basic.”
“So first we go inside, look at what you wanted to show me, and then check the facilities, is that what you’re saying?”
“How did you understand that from that!?”
“Because it’s you, Do-dam.”
“....”
After hesitating for a moment, Do-dam jabbed me lightly in the side.
“There’s a whole nest of evil in the Commander’s heart. I don’t like that.”
“?”
And leaving the staff member behind, we went inside.
Once in, I had to admire it all over again.
Do-dam said, “Whoa, boomer computers. It’s got retro vibes, doesn’t it?”
“....”
I couldn’t argue.
The interior of the arena was genuinely old.
The computers at the player seats, arranged in an 11-shaped formation facing one another, were still running on specs from ten years ago, and the broadcasting equipment for filming was the same.
The audience section is just a hundred folding chairs dumped in here… and maybe the only things actually worth using are the broadcast display out front and the lighting?
While I was looking around,
Do-dam quietly took a seat at one of the player stations. Then she looked at me and smiled brightly.
“Hehe, this was it. This was where the legend of Doda, the strongest Vtuber gamer in the world, began.”
“....”
“See that podium for the host? When that old guy standing there told the participants, ‘Please make a nickname!’ I was flustered. I’d already written DODAM in English.”
Tap.
Tap, tap.
She tapped at the dusty mechanical keyboard.
And then….
As if she were back in childhood,
as if she were inventing a nickname all over again,
she struck the Backspace key once.
Tap!
“So I deleted one M from the end.”
“....”
“That’s it.”
“I see.”
It was so slapdash I had nothing to say.
“....”
“....”
Then Do-dam suddenly went, “Huh!” and looked at me.
“Wow, wait a second. I’m an orphan, and I deleted the M? How much meaning did I pack into a simple nickname?”
“....”
“Do-dam-aries probably don’t know, do they? That there’s this much sadness in my nick…. Hic, this morning was delicious.”
“....”
Seriously.
It was the kind of joke that was hard to answer.
So I didn’t.
Do-dam looked over at me with an awkward expression.
“Ah, that self-roast was a bit much. Sorry.”
“It’s fine.”
“Then… let’s go back to the original story.”
“....”
“I told you before, right? I said I got absolutely wrecked by a third grader in that seat.”
“Yes, I heard.”
“That kid ended up making it all the way to the finals and got picked up as a pro team trainee.”
Do-dam looked at the empty stands. The shadow of the past seemed to drift in her eyes.
“The grown-ups sitting there all stood up and gave that elementary school kid a round of applause. I went back with tears pouring down my face, hand in hand with the priest.”
“....”
“When I quietly went out through that corridor back then, I was so jealous of that kid…. I kept thinking about it. Kept thinking. Thooooought about it forever.”
All the glory for the winner,
all the cold indifference for the loser.
For something experienced at such a young age,
it was a brutally cruel law of victory and defeat.
So Do-dam said,
“That’s why….”
“....”
“I just wanted to become one once.”
“Become what?”
“A champion. In this place.”
Do-dam, the Vtuber Doda, who had never managed to leave that old match behind, said to me from the player seat, her eyes shining blue.
“Manager Seonwoo Taek, can I do it? With the one billion won I’ve been given.”
“....”
“I want to become the champion here, in this place. It’s a personal desire, but I can make it fun for everyone too. But to do that, I need your help, Manager.”
“....”
“I’m just a game girl who doesn’t know anything except games.”
“....”
I answered, “Of course. You may do whatever you like.”
“!”
“Buying the stadium, becoming champion….”
All of it.
Everything.
“Because that’s your dream.”
“....”
“I’m only here to support it.”
“....”
Do-dam looked back at the monitor. Then she clicked the mouse of the powered-off computer with her right hand, and tapped the QWER keys with her left.
Click-clack.
Tap-tap-tap.
“....”
“....”
After a little while, she said quietly, “...Thanks for the assist.”
“It’s nothing.”
At that moment,
I heard movement behind us.
Clunk!
“!”
“!”
We turned.
There stood the middle-aged man, rubbing his hands on the back of his pants. He had been coming in with a tired look on his face, but when our eyes met, he flinched.
He must have been the “Reporter Nam” the staff member mentioned earlier.
He spoke in surprise. “Uh…?”
“....”
“....”
Then he asked, “Who… are you?”
“....”
I answered, “People who came to look around.”
“....”
*
Back in front of the subway station.
Do-dam sat in the gukbap shop, grumbling. In the end, we couldn’t talk in front of Reporter Nam, so we’d moved here to eat as well.
-Let’s eat first and then go.
-Understood.
So we sat down in a gukbap place run by a grandmother who was handling the whole dining room by herself, and got ready to eat lunch. Even so, Do-dam kept complaining.
“That was supposed to be my emotional moment, but now the pitch got wrecked. How does he show up exactly at that timing?”
“Can’t be helped. He was there first.”
“Anyway, about the stadium remodeling….”
“Yes, I’ll help make sure it moves as quickly as possible.”
“Thanks for the assist.”
As we chatted while waiting,
the owner grandmother brought over the stone pot with the finished gukbap.
“Here you go, eat well. It’s been a while since I’ve seen customers.”
“Yes, thank you.”
Do-dam froze.
Then she muttered, “Huh…? I ordered yukgaejang, not bean sprouts….”
“....”
At that, the grandmother tried to take the pot back, saying, “Oh dear! I’m sorry.” Do-dam, flustered by that reaction instead, waved her hands and said it was fine.
The two of them bickered back and forth like they were in a tug-of-war.
“Oh dear, look at me. After finally getting customers again….”
“N-no, it’s fine. I was just startled, that’s all.”
Because of all that noise, someone came out of the kitchen.
It was a young woman in a pink apron, with a timid-looking face. She seemed a little confused, standing there awkwardly.
“Um, ma’am. Did something come out wrong?”
She looked this way, then suddenly jolted.
And Do-dam, who had turned to look toward the kitchen, jolted too.
“Hiiik?!”
“Huh…?”
An awkward silence settled over the room.
“....”
“....”
Do-dam was the first to speak.
“Aeri unnie, didn’t you say you were working part-time at an English academy…? Why are you in the kitchen of a gukbap shop…?”
“....”
“And didn’t you say you quit the part-time job…?”
“....”
The woman called Aeri avoided our eyes in every direction and mumbled, “I-I mean… I was only going to w-work until this month… Just lunchtime.”
“What about the English academy?”
“....”
Aeri pinched her fingers together and made her excuse.
“T-to be honest… I got f-fired a few months ago. They said I kept teaching the grammar wrong.”
“Aeri unnie, you’re American.”
“I-I’m Korean originally….”
Listening to that strange exchange, I turned to Do-dam, who looked utterly drained.
“Do you know her?”
“....”
Do-dam smiled awkwardly. “That one’s our B.”
“....”
Ah.
I see.
So she’s Berri-ri….
She was working at a gukbap shop.