110. Why Can't We Do Doggy Style After Childbirth!
110. Why Can't We Do Doggy Style After Childbirth!
The Queen Siren Subjugation Operation
To be precise, it was a matter that only now proceeded after a disgustingly long report, meetings, and directives from higher-ups titled 'Speculation on the Possibility of Queen Siren's Emergence Through the Abnormal Proliferation of Sirens.'
The casualties caused by the Sirens.
The damage report on the Athena Guild members.
The proposals for preliminary investigations and prevention methods.
The search for solutions that could resolve this, and so on.
After a complex process that, if you counted only the procedures, would not be enough even if you used all ten fingers,
"Directives have come down from above."
Soon, she spoke.
"On the night of the full moon──on that day, we subjugate the Queen Siren."
"""""Uoooooh!!!!"""""
The declaration of subjugation.
All the members of the Athena Guild raised their voices and shouted.
The day had finally arrived.
Those ruinous monsters who had snatched away their comrades, their close friends, their siblings and colleagues.
They were simply grateful that they could finally put an end to them with their own hands.
"Those dog-like fish heads....!"
"Even now, just thinking about it makes me.... bleurgh....!"
"I can never eat caviar again...."
In truth, it was absolutely not that they were angry from the shock of becoming fish-fuckers.
It was purely a struggle to avenge their comrades and to eliminate a calamity for humanity.
"Then, finally, we will have a speech from Minerva."
"Chrono, I mean that's.... ah, huh? Yes?"
She slowly turned around.
Minerva.
The guild master of the Athena Guild.
His sole bloodline, a leader who evenly possessed the three beats of competence, versatility, and talent.
...was just something many articles phrased it as, but
"Now, Minerva-yang!"
"Uh....."
Anyway, the meaning of a standard-bearer included leading the vanguard, but above all, it also carried the meaning of being a 'mascot.'
A being whose mere existence itself was a source of strength and help.
That was why she looked at Minerva with sparkling eyes, and...
"Well.... I mean......."
She stepped up onto the platform.
Uncharacteristically, she wore a slightly blank expression and looked bewildered, turning around several times before
"....Everyone of the Athena Guild."
She spoke.
"You do know this is all a lie, right?"
"""""......???"""""
Under the circumstances where everyone was dumbfounded,
"Yes...!"
Only one man was rejoicing at this.
Of course,
'Boss awakening event cleared!'
That man was me.
...
..
.
There was definitely this kind of thing.
You must not attack a transforming magical girl.
It was proper etiquette to watch a boss monster's awakening scene to the end.
The truth that Santa Claus doesn't exist, so it's okay to cry.... was that a bit different?
Anyway,
"Does it absolutely have to be on the full moon?"
"Huh...?"
I spoke toward Minerva.
"The Athena Guild is a 'wise' guild, isn't it?"
"That's... right?"
"Then why can't I see even a single 'w' of wisdom in this part?"
"Huh...???"
Athena Regional Guild.
About two days before the meeting.
Minerva informed me of the subjugation operation against the Queen Siren.
She said that due to the nature of her position, she found out about it one step faster than the related staff.
"No matter how I think about it, the full moon isn't it."
".....Chrono?"
"No, think about it for a second."
The full moon day.
Put another way, it meant the day when the full moon rose.
"When will the Queen Siren lay her eggs?"
"That's... on the full moon, right?"
"Right. She'll lay her eggs on the day of the full moon, won't she?"
This part was a typical 'cliché' element, so I omitted the explanation.
"So, isn't that why they designated that day? Because the boss inevitably becomes weaker during her spawning day..."
"Right. That's correct."
No matter how strong a boss is, it becomes weak the moment it gives birth.
Frankly speaking, even a person weakens when taking a shit, so how much weaker would they be during the moment of giving birth, which is far more taxing?
So, I was in favor of raiding on the spawning day up to that point.
'But see, here's the thing?'
That story missed one 'condition.'
"If the boss weakens, do the other trash mobs weaken too?"
"Huh...?"
The boss laid eggs.
The boss was producing its own minions.
Then, naturally, countless Sirens would gather to protect those eggs, so if one attempted to ambush the Sirens on that day, they would have no choice but to fight the Sirens trying to protect the Queen.
And...
'Actually, that's the original content.'
In the original work,
The Athena Guild Mastered straight for the boss room on the full moon day.
They faced the Queen Siren, who was in the middle of laying eggs, and engaged in battle.
Fortunately, the Queen was in a state where she couldn't significantly intervene in the fight because she was spawning eggs.
Instead, the main content of the battle involved the numerous surrounding trash mobs attacking the Athena Guild members, while the Queen Siren sang a song from behind and inflicted a debuff.
During that process, the Athena Guild was eventually outnumbered, and upon seeing the protagonist's party staggering from being charmed, Minerva awakened, declared that since they were going to die anyway she'd do what she wanted, pulled out her electric guitar, played it, negated the debuff, and inversely weakened the Sirens, winning the battle──but, well.
'I already know the process, so there's no need to struggle.'
That was why I had to say it to Minerva.
"Let's leave them alone until they finish laying all the eggs."
"That's....."
"And after they're done, we target them when they're exhausted."
"..........."
A strange look in her eyes.
Ignoring it, I continued speaking.
"After they finish laying the eggs, the forces will be dispersed to move the eggs, right? Plus, they're living creatures too, so they'll have to get some sleep and eat and stuff."
Work is something you don't feel fatigue from while doing it, while you're concentrating.
But after the work is completely finished, you wouldn't be able to come to your senses due to the fatigue that rushes in all at once.
"And we'll be aiming for that moment."
The Queen Siren, already exhausted to the point of being worn out.
Additionally, the surrounding minions would also be drained from diligently standing guard.
On top of that, if the forces were even dispersed to move the eggs, it could truly become a strategy that killed three birds with one stone.
"Rather than a strategy... wouldn't it be closer to a scheme...."
"Huh? What did you say?"
I was concentrating on racking my brain, so I didn't hear it well.
So, what did you say just now?
"It's nothing.... I just thought that if someone has Chrono as an enemy, that person would be tired out in many ways...."
"...What the hell do you see me as?"
Were you looking at me like I was some kind of cold, heartless something?
"....Anyway, does the story end like that?"
"Ah, one more thing. We could also use those eggs they laid as a side bonus to threaten the Queen Siren. If something like maternal love exists, that is, hypothetically speaking."
"Hmm, when it gets to this point, it actually feels refreshing!"
"???"
I didn't really know what she meant, but it was probably a compliment, right?
I finished explaining the plan to Minerva, and Minerva jotted down my words in a notebook she got from who knows where.
And the result that came out of that was precisely....
[Full Moon Day, Queen Siren Subjugation Decided]
"Nevertheless, honor must be preserved, they say─what are they, the Ares Guild or something!"
Giiik
Ik
Giiiiaaaak....!
The subjugation order that came right up to our noses and proceeded as scheduled.
Ultimately, the trashy act of attacking from behind after childbirth, fell through, and I buried my head into the desk and let out a long sigh.
"What's the problem...?"
"Aha... ha... haha....."
Minerva let out an awkward laugh.
No, seriously. What was the problem?
If you knew the answer, tell me the answer.
I turned my head toward Minerva and silently questioned her.
"Well.... that's, honestly, the fact is it does feel a bit repulsive, you know?"
"What's that? These fish-fuckers. They're fine with piercing through fish scales and doing it, but doing it from behind after childbirth gives them a sense of repulsion?"
Wow, what noble folks you all were.
All that talk about avenging their comrades was complete bullshit!
'If it were the Ares Guild, I could at least understand...'
They were a bit, you know, that.
Should I call it Spartan? Should I call it 300?
Talk about whether something was honorable or not, whether it was noble or not, should only come from a guild like Ares. Why was a guild that revered wisdom trying to pull off this kind of retarded bullshit?
"Retarded guild!"
"....I am a member of that guild, you know?"
"Honestly, it's retarded."
"............."
"Why, when there's an easy path, do you deliberately go the hard way and scream that you want to die!"
"We must uphold the line as human beings...."
What?
Whaaat?
"The liiine as human beings?"
That was a good thing to say.
Talking about lines was just perfect.
"Since we're on the topic of lines, let me ask you this: then isn't fucking a fish crossing the line?"
"That's only because they fell under 'charm'──"
"──In the first place, why do monsters have human rights! Just kill them! Good monster is a dead monster! The only good monster is a dead monster!"
"Chrono....."
Minerva looked at me with a gaze that increasingly saw me as something else.
Hey... you shouldn't look at me like this right now.
Did you think I was doing this for no reason?
"You remember me going to subjugate the [Cave Ants] before, right? Was that during the final exams?"
"Ah, yes. Watching it really gave me goosebump──"
"17 people died."
"........."
17 people.
From what I remembered, about 28 entered, and more than half got chewed up.
After that, the guild compensated them or whatever──Minerva, let me ask you just one thing.
"You... have you ever seen a person die right in front of your eyes?"
"....That's..."
"People chewed up and killed by ants, people begging to be saved. I saw all of that and just barely made it back alive."
".............."
Only then did Minerva's complexion change.
I quietly muttered toward Minerva.
"This subjugation, how many do you think will die?"
"....If you set out onto the battlefield after devising a plan that can win, victory is as good as guaranteed."
"Yeah, so how many do you think will die."
"......That's...."
A pale expression.
Trembling fingertips.
Only then did I realize I had been too harsh and clicked my tongue softly.
'What am I doing right now.'
Wasn't it that I just had to protect the heroines?
I didn't need to pay attention to people screaming that they wanted to go down the path of hell.
So,
"Don't worry."
"...Chrono..?"
Other extras might be different, but
"You, I will protect."
I let out a light sigh and decided to prepare whatever I could.
"..Uh.... grammar.... uh...."
"...? What's wrong with you?"
As I got up to leave, this kid's condition was strange.
Should I say her face was quite red,
or that her eyes were wide open and she didn't know what to do?
"....I'll protect you, too."
"Huh?"
She pressed strength firmly into her lips and spoke,
"I will protect you, too, Chrono."
Saying that,
Minerva clenched both hands into fists and looked up at me.
'.....Hmm.'
It was a bit of a turn-on──no, I was drawn to it.
Turned on, not drawn? Drawn, not turned on.
As a side note,
[Goddess Athena: Wanna try?]
'Goddess, please.'
You're a virgin goddess, aren't you?
Why were you so desperate when you couldn't even do it?
[Goddess Athena: Just because I can't do it doesn't mean my child can't, does it?]
'No, why doesn't that reason exist?'
Wasn't Artemis going around doling out divine punishment for breaking oaths and all that?
[Goddess Athena: Ah, that's called old maid hysteria.]
'..............'
She really was an old maid, so I had nothing to say, but
...Then what about you, ma'am?
[Goddess Athena: Do you think I'm the goddess of wisdom for nothing?]
'???'
The goddess of wisdom was,
truly wise, literally, so
[Goddess Athena: If I descend into my apostle's body, I can actually physically experience it.]
'......Uh..'
Through her apostle's body, she had acquired the virgin bitch attribute, or something like that.
....I didn't want to know that, such a thing.