Giving Without Holding Back
Giving Without Holding Back
The battlefield, which had roared with chaos only moments ago, was now silent as if it had never happened.
The quiet was so thick that making any noise felt intrusive.
I kept as still as possible, afraid that even a small sound might escape, and gauged the atmosphere.
The pit carved by magic. The plain was dotted with many such craters, but the one gouged by the Calamity Flame was among the larger ones.
Sitting quietly in the center of that pit, I felt a gaze from the opposite side boring into me.
It belonged to the 5th Iteration, who had settled himself roughly and was observing the top of my head with an unwavering stare.
"......"
"......"
We hadn't been sitting there long. A moment of silence drifted between us.
"Hah."
The 5th Iteration, who had been studying me with an odd expression, let out a deep sigh. My shoulders flinched reflexively. He raised both hands, grabbed his helmet, and pulled it upward.
The helmet slid off smoothly.
Now that the battle was over, most of its functions had faded.
Its original purpose had been Restraint and Veil—a measure, apparently, to prevent the 5th Iteration's identity from being revealed.
Of course, the Authority of Observation had easily pierced through such functions, so I had recognized his face long before.
However, that was during combat. Now, with a calmer mind, I studied the 5th Iteration's appearance more closely.
'His face really is similar.'
It wasn't completely identical.
There were scars here and there, and even outside of combat, circuit markings were visible on the surface of his skin. Someone who didn't know the circumstances might mistake them for blue-dye tattoos.
His body was considerably different. His height was... tall. And his frame was burly with muscle, far from the slender physique of a typical mage.
"Whew, now I can breathe. What a pain that helmet was."
The 5th Iteration shook his head lightly and dusted off his hair.
"How much of the explanation did you get?"
He lifted his head and fixed me with dark eyes as he asked.
"I heard you met the Tower Master at the Tower of Knowledge. They said the situation was explained then, but I don't know how much you were told."
【Hmm... I heard most of it.】
"Did you also hear about the background of how the iterations were born?"
【...Yes.】
At the 5th Iteration's indifferent question, my expression clouded over.
The Tower Masters foresaw an invasion and conducted a kind of simulation to prepare for the future.
A simulated world, copied from a specific point in time. They would observe it up to a certain period, then rewind it to the beginning and observe again.
Essentially, it was a simulation.
Just as one calculates and predicts weather or star trajectories using a computer, the Tower Masters conducted an experiment to ascertain many of the world's futures.
"It was a variable that we were born in there, apparently."
The 5th Iteration frowned and scratched his head.
"Originally, we... this body of mine should have remained an empty shell. That would be obvious, since it had no soul."
A physical body for the savior to one day use. But the simulation did not account for him.
After all, the plan was to moderately process the information about the futures observed and hand it over to me.
From the Tower Masters' perspective, they had merely created a virtual world and looked into the changing future through calculation and prediction.
"They must have been flustered from their standpoint too. To have an artificial intelligence suddenly awaken to its own self-awareness inside a computer simulation, realizing it was a false world and acting on that knowledge."
In that observed world, my supposedly vacant physical body had started acting.
A soul, however faint, blossomed anew, constructed an ego, and realized that it was a false world.
It was a variable that the Tower Masters had never anticipated in the slightest.
"That's why I couldn't meet the Tower Masters either, so I hear. The Tower Masters hadn't been manifested in the first place. No matter how much I wandered day and night, there was no way to find something that didn't exist."
The Tower Masters did not exist in the observed world. More precisely, the three invading Tower Masters existed, but the five Tower Masters on this side did not.
Since they only needed to observe future events, there was no reason to go through the trouble of manifesting themselves.
And so, no matter how much one wandered the observed world, one could never meet the Tower Masters.
Nor could the Tower Masters provide help from the outside.
The simulation was an experiment into which the Tower Masters themselves had invested a great deal of power. They said they couldn't intervene from the outside after it was already running.
And so the simulation persisted. The empty body began to act, and due to that connection point, even records were transmitted to the next.
After the body began acting, the simulated world was rewound roughly eleven or so times before it exhausted all its power and concluded.
"...It's a shitty situation. If there weren't any circumstances, I could have hated them comfortably, but since there are circumstances, it's awkward to just curse them out, you know?"
The 5th Iteration muttered to himself and let out a short, scoffing laugh. Facing him, I hung my head with a heavy heart.
Even though I hadn't personally stepped into that simulation and interfered, my heart was heavy because I was still connected to it all.
"Hey, don't stand there looking like a dog that's about to shit itself. What did you even do?"
- Thwack!
【Ugk!】
The 5th Iteration clicked his tongue and suddenly flicked my forehead. Thanks to being in the Tower of Growth, there was no pain.
As I clutched my forehead, he shrugged his shoulders.
"Coming here was my own will. After being summoned and having the situation explained, I accepted it and came to help. If I had any grudges, I wouldn't have bothered coming to help."
【Ah...】
At his words, I pressed my lips shut. Ultimately, coming to help was his own decision. That meant, if he hadn't wanted to, he wouldn't have come.
While inwardly relieved, I suddenly recalled the 2nd Iteration I had met during the last Tower entry.
...I hadn't had a proper conversation with the 2nd Iteration, but at the end, I had heard him whisper softly that he was sorry for tormenting me.
Did the 2nd Iteration also appear to help me after accepting the situation?
"In the first place, the responsibility lies with those damn Tower Masters. I'll admit it was an unforeseeable variable, but in the end, it's still their fault."
Those damn Tower Masters. At that tone, my lips unconsciously puckered into a slight pout.
"Oh? Why are you pouting your lips like that?"
Of course, I quickly tucked it back in, considering the 5th Iteration's position, but having witnessed it, he let out a dumbfounded laugh.
"Seriously... Hey, something I've been curious about since earlier. Just how did that person sweet-talk you that your affection is so damn high? She didn't just teach you magic, right? Let's hear the reason."
The 5th Iteration asked that, seeming genuinely curious.
His tone implied he truly couldn't fathom why I was defending Ariel.
【Hmm...】
At that question, I briefly traced back my memories within the Tower of Knowledge.
【...Ariel was a good person to me.】
"Oh yeah?"
The 5th Iteration responded flatly. I carefully gauged his reaction while running my fingers along my necklace.
【Yes. She taught me magic from the basics with all her heart and sincerity. Even when I asked questions about things I didn't know, she explained kindly without ever seeming the slightest bit bothered.】
"Hmm, her magic skill is certainly decent... ish, but wasn't the risk factor absolutely insane? Did you recklessly modify the spell formulas without the Tower Master's permission?"
【...Even outside of magic, whenever I asked things, she tried her best to resolve my questions.】
"Look at him selectively filtering what he hears. Well, with your level of mana manipulation, I suppose you're not likely to make a mistake..."
The 5th Iteration let out a hollow laugh. I subtly averted my gaze from him and traced my memories even further back.
More precisely, memories that were even happier.
【When I solved magic problems, she would stroke my head and tell me I did well.】
"...? Is that so?"
【Yes. Even when I couldn't solve a problem properly, she would pat me and tell me not to be disheartened.】
"Ohh... I see."
The 5th Iteration's expression turned a bit strange.
But I mostly ignored him and, recalling the memories of that time, expressed just how well Ariel had treated me.
She would offer her embrace so I could sleep comfortably. If she felt I was fussing a bit, she would gently stroke my head and back and soothe me.
When I couldn't sleep, she told me old stories or read me fairy tales, and so on...
I had been wary of Ariel at first, too. But I opened my heart to her after seeing the sincerity and concern she showed me.
The 5th Iteration probably couldn't unreservedly approve of her given his position, but once he learned what a kind person Ariel was, his resentment would ease even a little bit.
With that intention, I tried my best to elaborate on all the things Ariel had done for me.
"......"
My explanation ended. For some reason, the 5th Iteration blinked his eyes.
Soon wearing a slightly dubious expression, he looked me up and down with a confused look.
"...So, you, how old are you now?"
【?】
【I'm twenty.】
I tilted my head at the sudden question. Why was he suddenly asking my age? He should know that as a first-year at Siyoram, I was normally around twenty.
"...For real? Isn't your body somewhere between fourteen and fifteen...? Your mentality seems even younger... and you're a little short?"
【I'm not.】
【I'm not short—I'm not short, I'm tall enough, it's just that the people around me are too big and burly, it's not that I—】
"Aaaah! I don't know what that is, but I'm sorry!"
.
.
.
"Whew, anyway... I just asked you to stay so I could say a few things."
Having apologized for his slip of the tongue, the 5th Iteration cleared his throat.
He seemed ready to get to the main point. Having accepted his apology, I also listened with a serious attitude.
"That thing you just copied... the Circuit Spell Formulation. Do you really have to learn and use that?"
【Huh?】
"No matter how nicely you speak of it, that thing isn't a good technique. It's a half-baked, shoddy defective product."
The 5th Iteration shook his head from side to side.
"The risk is insanely high, and the manipulation is disgustingly difficult. Yet it doesn't produce output that matches the effort. The payoff is a pittance compared to the work you put in."
The 5th Iteration vented about the dangers of his own technique.
"My Unique Magic Path? That only made it somewhat efficient. Didn't you hear the information passed on? You should know how I ended up."
My face clouded over at his words.
The 5th Iteration's end was self-destruction. What led to that situation was a desperate struggle with a 2nd-Rank monster, but in the end, he died because he couldn't control his rampaging circuits and mana.
"For the record, I didn't get my ass kicked by that 2nd-Rank. That bastard was in a position to rush civilians the moment it crossed the front line, so I deliberately! Held out in a disadvantageous location. That's why it happened. If we fought again properly, I would win."
【Ah, yes...】
"...Anyway. Think about the danger. The reason I deliberately used this was because it was the only path I knew at the time. But you're different, aren't you?"
The 5th Iteration pointed his finger at me.
"How many things can you do? Just from what I've seen, martial arts, spirit arts, magic... none of it's at a half-assed level. They've all crossed the front line, and on top of that, you handle the Calamity Flame."
Diversity of available means. That was my greatest strength, having All-Rounder and Mana Affinity.
"And in the midst of all that, there's no need for you to deliberately learn my technique, which is caked with nothing but risk factors."
【But, from what I felt while facing and using it, it seemed like an incredibly amazing technique...】
I wasn't just saying empty words. I knew the 5th Iteration had blatantly held back. If he had fought properly, it would have been difficult to gain the upper hand.
The 5th Iteration's expression, as he continued speaking, turned strange.
"...I'm grateful? that you say so, but... You said you're a first-year, right?"
【Yes, I'll soon be a second-year.】
"Anyway, you're only in your first year and you're already at that level. There are three years left until you graduate from Siyoram, so how much more will you grow? By that time, you probably won't even need to use my technique."
The 5th Iteration shrugged his shoulders and shook his head.
"When I was at your point in time... I was running my tail off during the Birth Festival tower entry. I grew in my own way, but I could never dominate against all the cadets at once."
But you're different. The 5th Iteration's calm eyes fixed on me.
"You, I think you can win."
He didn't ask explicitly against whom. I could tell what he was referring to.
"The Tower Masters' thinking seems to be correct. Even from what I see, you can do it."
【Thank you for saying that.】
"I'm just telling you what I think. So don't be too anxious."
My shoulders flinched at the 5th Iteration's bantering remark.
【...You could tell? I always try to be careful about it...】
"Yeah, on a casual look it's not visible. But since I was observing with it in mind, I could feel you trembling continuously."
【Yeah... thank you.】
I nodded at his answer. And I steadied my trembling body with even greater focus.
"The Reverse Side, are you going before it erupts?"
As I was controlling my body, the 5th Iteration's question caught my ears. I nodded, stroking the Purification resting on my lap.
【Yes, I plan to go.】
"Since you have the Authority of Space, I don't even know what you'll be capable of. But even considering that, it'll be quite a bit dangerous, won't it?"
【Still... because maybe I can do something.】
"Mmm."
The 5th Iteration let out a thoughtful hum at my answer.
"Don't try too hard to live kindly. Do things in moderation. Living nice and pure doesn't gain you a damn thing except losses."
At his calmly delivered words, I made a rather strange expression.
【Um... didn't you just say that you lost to that 2nd-Rank because you were thinking of civilians?】
"That's why I died. It's the counsel of a man who's already died once, so take it to heart."
【Ahaha...】
I let out an awkward laugh at his bantering words. It was a statement hard to respond to.
"Anyway, that's about it. I told you my technique isn't worth using, and I called you over because I had a few random curiosities."
The conversation didn't go on much longer. Having asked his miscellaneous questions, the 5th Iteration stood up and dusted off his backside.
I also got up, clutching the Purification that had been on my lap tightly.
【...Are you leaving?】
"Of course I'm leaving. You think I'd stay here all alone and lonesome?"
The 5th Iteration replied as if I had asked something pointless. At that, I pressed my quivering lips firmly shut.
He glanced around briefly, then patted my shoulder.
"Honestly, it's a little ridiculous to be giving advice to a guy more talented than me, but do well."
【...Yeah.】
【Sadness】
"Hah! What's with that necklace since earlier? It's hilarious how it leaks your emotions."
【Don't tease me...】
【Sadness】
【Melancholy】
The 5th Iteration, who had been speaking calmly, burst into laughter at the voice of the necklace. He laughed and stared at the Confession Necklace.
"It's remarkable that it even conveys emotions. Or does it even convey your mental images? It looks low-grade, but its function is unusual. Thank you. I get to leave with a laugh at the end."
The 5th Iteration chuckled and waved his hand. At that sight, I pressed my lips shut, trying to hold back the surge of emotion...
【Ah.】
Amidst that, a thought that surfaced belatedly made me open my mouth.
"Why? What is it now?"
The 5th Iteration, who had been looking up at the sky, blinked. At his question about what was up, I reached into the subspace and fumbled around, pulling out an object from inside.
"A potion?"
The 5th Iteration tilted his head, looking at the potion in my hand. A liquid close to a purple color... contained in a thin glass test tube.
I held it out to him.
【It's the Potion of Being Hated.】
"What's with that childish name?"
The 5th Iteration observed the potion he had picked up with a strange look. Soon, his eyes, which were examining the drug, narrowed.
"...This thing. Does it also have a temptation effect?"
【Yes, and it also has a perception-altering effect. It's said to twist the perception of the wearer in the worst possible way, and I concentrated it to increase the effect.】
"Perception alteration? That was a hell of a rare property. But the effect is... a bit ambiguous... So, why this?"
【Would you be willing to drink it?】
"?"
A question mark floated above the 5th Iteration's head. At his expression, I rubbed the necklace as if making excuses.
【Well, I originally intended to catch a monster during the tower entry and feed it to it... but the opportunity slipped away...】
"...So you want to feed it to me? To test the efficacy?"
【I was just asking, just in case...】
"......"
At the 5th Iteration's dumbfounded expression, I unconsciously hunched my shoulders.
Since he said he'd be disappearing anyway, I just asked, just in case...
"...Hah, fine. I'll do it as thanks for making me laugh at the end."
Letting out a sigh, the 5th Iteration shrugged his shoulders. At that, my face brightened involuntarily.
- Pop!
"The temptation effect is stronger than I thought, huh? Guess I need to store it well."
The 5th Iteration pulled the cap off the test tube. He briefly sniffed the scent with a strange expression, then tossed the drug straight into his mouth.
- Gulp.
The 5th Iteration's Adam's apple bobbed down. The drug went down into his stomach.
- Kugung!
In that instant, a vibration ran through the 5th Iteration's body. That wave brushed past the surroundings and tickled my body.
My senses, my perception of the outside world, shifted.
- Shuuk!
"Gak!"
A blade drawn from Purification pierced through the 5th Iteration's throat.
Both I, who had pierced him, and the 5th Iteration opened our eyes wide.
Though unable to speak with his throat pierced, the 5th Iteration conveyed his meaning to me with his eyes.
That this stuff's effect is way too strong.
I agreed and nodded in satisfaction.
'Alright, if the efficacy is this high...'
When ingested, it seems like it would make someone stab me without hesitation.
【Thank you very much.】
- You son of a plague, a guy saying thanks stabs me in the throat?
A telepathic voice flowed into my ears. At the irked voice resonating in my head, I let out a bashful, sheepish smile.
Soon my face clouded over again, sullenly.
Parting with the 5th Iteration was sad, but it was also because a schedule I had for... tomorrow? had come to mind.
On the fourth day of the Birth Festival, what's commonly called a variety-show schedule...
And, the cross-dressing schedule was waiting for me...