Chapter 39
Chapter 39
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: penny
Chapter: 39
Chapter Title: The Pineapple Maniac
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Smoke was billowing in front of the auditorium.
No matter where I looked around, all I could see was smoke.
"Hahaha!!"
Before the smoke even began to clear, booming laughter echoed out.
Soon, through gaps in the smoke, tufts of deep indigo hair poked out unevenly.
"What a beautiful sight!!"
The smoke gradually thinned.
Only then did the laughing man's figure come into clear view.
He was... impossible to define in a single word.
So bizarre that it looped around from difficult to strangely simple.
The man was extremely unique, peculiar, and downright weird.
His indigo hair was tied up on top, making it stick out in all directions like a pineapple.
A Hawaiian shirt and shorts in pineapple colors, paired perfectly with flip-flops—yet he had goggles hanging around his neck.
A pineapple-shaped mace dangled from his waist, and he clutched pineapples in both hands.
In short... he was a pineapple maniac.
His utterly outlandish appearance finally jogged the name to mind.
"Pyen Flo..."
Despite his comical looks, he was a skilled bomb enthusiast.
He was unmistakably a pineapple-obsessed maniac, and while he was a gag character in truth...
Broken World being called trash everywhere had its reasons.
More importantly, why was this guy here?
It wasn't hard to guess.
The sharp-eyed ones from the Karmut Federation had likely seen their spies get fooled by me and decided to intervene personally by deploying Pyen Flo.
No one in their right mind would believe spies toyed with by some mysterious foe.
Behind Pyen Flo, I spotted fragments of the shattered barrier.
They must have struggled quite a bit to force their way through it.
The auditorium and student cafeteria had sustained minimal damage compared to the scale of the smoke—thanks to the barrier, no doubt.
"Ah, whoever you are, you there. Do you like pineapples?"
Pyen Flo finally noticed me and asked.
I gripped Deathwise's hilt with my intact right hand.
"Not really. They're too much hassle to like."
"What...? Did you just call pineapples a hassle...?"
"Peeling them is a pain, that's a fact."
"You dare speak without knowing...! A pineapple's beauty starts with that tough shell...!"
Pyen Flo ground his teeth and stomped the ground repeatedly.
Watching him vent his rage made my head throb.
Who in the world approaches pineapples for the beauty of their shell instead of the taste?
I couldn't comprehend a single thing he said, but he wasn't someone meant to be understood from the start.
Still, I had no choice but to stall for time.
My left hand could barely move from the pain.
I was ignoring it as best I could, but the fatigue was immense.
On top of that, it was still midday.
Without Deathwise's power, I had no confidence in taking on Pyen Flo alone.
Even as a gag character, he was highly skilled.
He never appeared in Broken World's main story, but main-story Ethan recalled him as a tough opponent.
Just breaking Esterro Academy's barrier showed his pineapple bombs could easily blow off limbs on a direct hit.
My fingertips grew ice-cold.
As I heightened my vigilance to the max, Pyen Flo stopped stomping and clutched his forehead.
"But I'm as forgiving as a pineapple, aren't I? So I can forgive your blasphemy! Of course I can! In return, let me recommend peeled pineapples boasting harmonious flavors! You there! What do you think of pineapple pizza!?"
Oh.
"That's a bit..."
Mint chocolate was fine, but pineapple pizza?
I recoiled at the line-crossing remark, and Pyen Flo turned pale.
"H-how could you blaspheme pineapple pizza like that...? Are you insane...?"
"You're the one who seems insane, reacting that hard to pineapple pizza."
"Impossible... This is the collapse of food culture...! It's like pouring vinegar on fried eggs! I pity you for not knowing pineapple's beauty...!"
Without warning, tears streamed down Pyen Flo's face as he raised the pineapple bombs in both hands high.
"So now, I'll teach you the beauty of pineapples myself... You didn't come alone, did you? That'll make it tough."
I'd heard that line somewhere before.
He sure loved to talk.
All the villains in this world had the same quirks.
But the similarity ended with the line.
No one was beside me now.
No Ethan to block attacks, no Leon to whittle down the enemy's health.
I couldn't stall until night, and my condition wasn't normal.
Could I do this?
No certainty, but I drew Deathwise.
It was something I had to do either way.
"Not alone—two of us."
Red hair tied in a single ponytail fluttered as a familiar voice cut in.
Kane had appeared beside me at some point, fiddling with her spear and smirking.
"What's this, playing with a walking pineapple? Having fun all by yourself, Theo."
"Does facing off one-on-one with a pineapple bomb nut look fun to you, Senior Kane?"
"If he's that far gone, it might be amusing. Can't laugh at the situation, though."
Kane spun her broad-bladed spear lightly.
Shedding her usual laid-back vibe, she now had the sharp, feral gaze of a beast.
"I've got the gist of the situation. Stepping up for the academy, huh."
"Had to. Can't just let them go."
"Still, jumping in personally is no small feat. I'm impressed."
No helping it.
The academy staff would prioritize evacuation, so they wouldn't step in.
The guards—True, despite grumbling about the hassle—would be rushing around everywhere.
They might handle it eventually, staff, student council, guards and all.
But with unknown casualties in the meantime, I couldn't sit idle.
"Not doing it because I want to."
"Then stay back. Can't have my pride bruised by backing off here."
"I'll sit this one out, then."
Good thing Kane stepped up.
Without Deathwise's power, she was stronger than me.
At this point in the story, Kane outdid even Leon.
"Just be careful. Those pineapples he's holding are bombs."
"He rants about their beauty, but they're bombs?"
"Don't bother understanding that part... The small ones explode on impact but have narrow range. The big ones have a three-second delay but wide area, so watch out."
"Tricky. How do you know all this?"
"Just heard about it."
From main-story Ethan.
That's all the patterns I knew.
"Guess I'll show off a bit in front of my junior?"
Kane spun her spear again.
"I'll etch the awesomeness of pineapples into your body! Go! Baby Pineapple! Golden Pineapple!"
With a grand shout, Pyen Flo hurled the pineapple bombs from both hands.
Kane charged straight at Pyen Flo, unfazed by the incoming bombs.
Boom! Kaboom!!
Explosions rocked the area in succession.
Amid the shaking ground and air, rising smoke, Kane dashed like a beast.
In that instant, she read the blast radii and slipped through an impossible gap in one breath.
The distance between them wasn't far.
But waiting for Kane was a group of toddling pineapples.
The baby pineapples fitted with crude legs were guided bombs.
Stopping meant getting caught.
Moving meant stepping into the bombs already scattered everywhere.
As Kane faced the dilemma, Pyen Flo lobbed a massive golden pineapple bomb at her.
Surrounded on all sides.
Defense and evasion both blocked.
No choice but to take down the main body directly.
That's when I judged.
Kane laid her spear sideways on the spot.
"Raaah! Swing!"
Then twisted her waist with all her might.
The spear spun with it, batting away the incoming golden pineapple.
Not a slash.
She used the flat of the blade to sweep the bomb aside.
Like smashing a baseball with a bat.
Deflecting a bomb with a spear.
And the golden pineapple even had that three-second delay.
Accounting for all of it to send the attack back.
It was a masterful feat.
"Ah."
Did he never expect the bomb to be returned like that?
Pyen Flo caught his own boomeranging bomb.
Then, with a ridiculously curt exclamation, he exploded spectacularly.
Kaboom!!
With a pineapple-shaped blast, Pyen Flo went flying.
His arc across the blue sky looked all too familiar, like a shooting star.
He wouldn't die from that, would he?
No clue why, but I was certain...
As Pyen Flo flew off, the walking baby pineapple bombs stopped.
The scattered golden pineapple bombs didn't explode despite the time passing.
Judging the area safe, Kane slung her spear over her shoulder and caught her breath lightly.
"Whew, if I hadn't known about the three-second delay, that could've been bad!"
"What's this now... Theo? Senior Kane's here too!"
With evacuation guidance wrapping up, Ethan and Leon approached.
Both looked unharmed.
"They told us to help with evacuation, but you went off to handle the dangerous stuff alone?"
"Not that dangerous. I just watched from behind. Senior Kane handled all the risky parts."
I brushed off Ethan's question casually and dusted my hands.
The blood-soaked handkerchief wrapped around my hand made Leon's expression grave.
"You're hurt."
"Just a scratch."
"That's too deep for 'just a scratch'..."
"Ethan, no need to fuss. A little ointment and it'll be fine."
It actually hurt like hell, but worrying these guys would be a real hassle.
As I forced a casual act, Kane draped an arm over Leon's shoulder and pouted.
"That's mean. I fought the weird pineapple maniac, and you sideline me like this."
"Pineapple maniac...?"
"Yeah, that exists."
Ethan looked curious, but I let it slide.
Too hard to explain Pyen Flo properly.
"More importantly, it's been a while? Little bro."
"Long time no see... Sis."
"Who's been avoiding me, making it 'long time'? Won't even reply to letters. Huh?"
"I'll try to write next time if possible."
"Oh? You've grown, little bro. Dodging now, are you?"
Their exchange was quite different from real siblings, but there was an odd familiarity.
Leon still awkwardly kept some distance from Kane.
Yet he called her sis, at least.
Well, Leon distancing himself from Kane was all because of the eldest son.
Their relationship was actually good.
They could just get along like this.
Talk it out, and most folks warm up.
Even I could boast of getting chummy with an enemy spy.
...
...
...Huh?
Come to think of it, the assassin who stabbed me was disguised as Luis.
So what happened to the real Luis?