Chapter 56
Chapter 56
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 56
Chapter Title: Secret Royal Inspector Kim Dae-bung (6)
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In movies and dramas, secret royal inspectors flash their plaque and immediately declare "seizure and dismissal from office" as if it's the most natural thing in the world.
The seizure—confiscating warehouses, ledgers, and all documents starting from the moment the inspector declares the inspection—is indeed within a secret royal inspector's authority...
But dismissal from office applies to officials who passed the civil service exams and became Joseon bureaucrats after seeing the past. That's an overreach beyond the inspector's authority.
In other words, it's the perfect way to get beaten to death with a staff.
Therefore, "seizure and dismissal" doesn't exist in reality.
The moment a secret royal inspector arrives at the county office, they gain the authority to literally thrash everyone except the magistrate.
As long as it's not beating someone to death with caning, they can administer dozens of cane strikes, confiscate property, or whatever without issue—even with the observer's permission.
They can turn the entire county upside down.
"Your Excellency, we are truly innocent."
"What exactly makes you fellows innocent?"
"We merely followed the magistrate's orders. Please show us mercy."
"Whether to show mercy or not will be decided after reviewing the county's tax ledgers. If it turns out you were truly coerced by the former Anseong magistrate into exploiting the people, I'll take that into full consideration, so don't worry."
Yi-bang's face drained of all color. He wore an expression as if everything was over.
He clearly understood exactly what I meant.
Right, I don't enjoy killing people either, so if it was done under duress or a minor crime at the level of petty offenses, I'd be willing to let it slide.
For public slaves, soldiers, or lowly clerks, if they cooperate diligently from here on, I'd generally give a stern warning and let it go.
But fellows like Yi-bang, the head of the Yi Office—one of the six local departments—or the Ho Office are equivalent to bureau chiefs in modern Korean local governments. Are the crimes these guys committed really minor?
I flashed a bright smile at Yi-bang and the other heads of the six departments—the Byung Office, Ho Office, Ye Office, and so on—who were bound alongside him.
The moment they saw my million-dollar smile, they froze solid.
Among them, the Anseong Ho Office head lost his mind to the fear I instilled and started spouting nonsense about Goryeo ghosts.
"Your Excellency, you've traveled a long way and must be weary. Wouldn't it be better to rest a bit before carrying out your duties?"
His intentions were plain as day. He'd serve me all sorts of delicacies from land and sea, ply me with strong liquor until I was dead drunk.
And throw in some pretty gisaeng to attend me through the night.
In Joseon, that wasn't much of a scandal, so they couldn't blackmail me with it. But while I was being entertained, these guys would frantically destroy evidence.
If I were the type to chase personal gain or hoard wealth, I might have let it slide...
'No chance.'
I shot up from my seat and pointed accusingly at the Ho Office head.
"You've truly lost your mind, you scoundrel. What are you lot doing? Bind that bastard in the cangue immediately!"
The Ho Office head was promptly bound in the cangue.
"Give that bastard ten strikes of the cane! For daring to attempt to bribe this inspector, he deserves death and wouldn't have a word to say about it."
"Spare me, Your Excellency! I only thought Your Excellency might be fatigued on the road..."
"No need to hear more. Bind him and cane him!"
The bound Ho Office head received ten strikes of the cane from the men I'd brought with me.
"One!"
A resolute shout rang out as the cane came down.
The Ho Office head's groan echoed through the county office.
"Urk!"
"Two!"
After a total of ten strikes, the Ho Office head fainted.
"That bastard dared to offer a bribe to an inspector, a most grave offense. Even after the inspection concludes, he'll be severely punished."
The other clerks trembled as they watched him beaten into a bloody pulp.
They must have realized it then.
That I, Kim Dae-bung, unlike other officials, was a madman who wouldn't take a single coin in bribes.
In modern society, it's natural for public officials not to take bribes, but to them, accustomed to Joseon common sense, I must look like a devil without blood or tears.
"Let's see... Just skimming the ledgers... you've skimmed quite a haul. Out of 19,432 seom of white rice, only 3,122 seom went to purchasing tribute goods for His Highness. That means you pocketed 16,310 seom."
Yi-bang and the clerks started collectively gulping in fear.
"Factoring in that the dutbak measures used here are 5 pun (5%) larger than those in Hanyang, it's closer to 17,000 seom skimmed. Impressive, truly impressive."
Joseon had no concept of local taxes, so nearly 7,000 seom of that was probably used for the county. If they'd only skimmed around 12,000 seom, I'd have considered it self-funded salaries and given a stern warning.
Joseon paid officials so little that honestly, serving without taking bribes was impossible.
And clerks were entirely unpaid...
Still, isn't this a bit much?
"Moreover, the Bangwon Law explicitly states that all tribute goods must be traded directly with merchants. Yet you violated it by trading through temples. Impressive, truly impressive."
I actually felt a twinge of respect for these guys.
The core of the Bangwon Law was collecting 18 tu per gyeol of fields. They followed that.
Looking at what they did, perhaps because it was called "Bangwon," they felt a sense of crisis that collecting more than 18 tu would kill them, so they stuck to it properly.
If the law had been called the Great Equalization Law, they might have taken it lighter and scrambled for loopholes to collect even more taxes.
They'd have generously skimmed for rat and bird losses during transport and storage—2 du of miscellaneous grains—plus transport and storage costs.
But because it was called Bangwon, they didn't dare collect more.
To skim even more, they couldn't cut ties with the temples they'd long been cozy with, so they lavished money on the monks too.
"Yi-bang."
"Yes, Your Excellency..."
"Once my report reaches Hanyang after finishing the Anseong investigation, what do you think will happen?"
"I wouldn't know, my lord."
His body was shaking—he clearly knew, but was pretending not to.
Fine, then. I'll make him realize it himself.
"Anseong Magistrate Yi Seok-do will be hard-pressed to avoid execution."
Unlike Ryu Jeong-hyeon, Yi Seok-do won't be branded a rebel.
Because this guy at least kept the line, not exceeding 18 tu per gyeol. He just traded with temples and pocketed personal profits...
Even Yi Bang-won, for all his aims of making an example, couldn't apply treason charges.
So he'll be punished solely for failing to faithfully implement the royal decree and embezzling vast public funds.
In such cases, yangban officials usually end with poison sake for an honorable death, but since an example is needed now, his head will be cut off and hung in Hanyang.
That's practically certain.
That's why I'm casually calling out the name of the county magistrate, six ranks above me. No need to respect the honor of a man whose head is as good as gone.
"Now, what do you think will happen to you lot?"
"Are you saying we'll also struggle to avoid execution if things proceed like this?"
I burst out laughing at that.
"Yi-bang, you're so clever—why join hands with the Anseong magistrate and do something so foolish?"
"My apologies, my lord..."
"No need to apologize. All this inspector need do is thoroughly investigate your crimes and submit a report to His Highness. Then you, Yi-bang, and all the six department heads will likely tour the Royal Guard Prison. You'll have a delightful time."
Local offices sometimes secretly use hot irons, thumbscrews, or caning on serious criminals on the down-low.
It's not supposed to happen, but everyone knows and looks the other way if kept discreet.
Unless overdone and someone dies.
But the Royal Guard Prison is different. Once dragged there, even death by torture is legal, so they torture suspects as naturally as breathing.
"I'll give you a choice."
I held up two fingers.
Then folded one down.
"One is to meekly admit your crimes right now. If you're lucky, you might skip the Royal Guard tour. Of course, you won't escape death like the Anseong magistrate."
Given Yi Bang-won's personality—no, even the merciful King Sejong—wouldn't spare these guys.
So the moment they head to Hanyang, they're walking corpses with death sentences.
I folded down the last finger.
"The other is to fully cooperate with my land survey using the fangjeonbeop. If you aid in exposing the hidden fields, I might sense your sincerity. What say you?"
"......Are you telling us to steel ourselves to make enemies of every yangban in the county?"
The most hated person in this world is the tattletale.
In school, chronic snitches are always ostracized, and in companies, whistleblowers get sidelined or bullied constantly.
How much more for clerks whose lives are built on local society?
It's like ordering them to smash their own foundations if they want to live.
"Better than dying, no?"
Yi-bang bowed his head at my words.
"Just spare our lives."
Alright, now it's time for the real "land survey"—no, tax investigation.
