In Those Days, We All...
In those days, we all…
Before he was cast as the general producer of My Idol Academia, Han Siwoo made only one request of the production staff.
That he would remain cold and unflinching at all times.
Put simply, he asked to play the villain.
For a public figure, it was a potentially fatal demand — yet Han Siwoo agreed without hesitation.
In his view, the idol industry was not a place where warmth alone could carry anyone to success.
Han Siwoo was now counted among the greatest idols of his generation… but even he had endured a grueling path to get there.
And so had every idol.
The brighter the light, the deeper the shadow.
So that his juniors would not suffer greater wounds in the future — so that the smaller wounds of the present might help them grow — Han Siwoo never held back his harsh words.
Along the way, there had been far too many heartbreaking cases.
Especially when he had to hand a C Rank to a contestant who had spent more than a decade as a trainee… his heart had ached beyond measure.
And yet…
…Hmm?
One contestant snagged his attention.
Training period… one month?
Truthfully, she had drawn his eye from the moment she first stepped onto the set.
And for good reason — even to someone who had spent over a decade in the entertainment industry, her beauty was overwhelming.
In this business, looks were inevitably one of the most critical requirements.
In that sense, Ha Yerin already possessed enormous star quality on appearance alone.
But still — a training period of one month?
If he gave a glowing evaluation to Ha Yerin, who had practiced for a mere month, how would the other contestants feel — the ones who had bled for years?
…They would be crushed.
And so Han Siwoo had no choice but to treat Ha Yerin even more coldly.
Of course…
"Because of my parents."
"……Excuse me?"
"Because of my parents… I have to become an idol…. I absolutely must…."
When Ha Yerin mentioned her parents, he flinched.
Parents……
Just hearing the word made his chest tighten.
Han Siwoo, too, had parents who made his heart heavy whenever he thought of them.
In a household already desperately poor… they had supported his long, endless trainee years.
His father had gone out for construction work every dawn; his mother had dragged her ailing body to restaurant shifts.
How many times had he sworn it, clutching the allowance soaked in his parents' blood and sweat?
That he would succeed… that he would make sure his parents never had to suffer again, that they could live in comfort.
The girl standing before him must have carried a similar resolve to the Han Siwoo of the past.
In reality, Ha Yerin's goal of becoming an idol was closer to a reverse Han Siwoo — one who needed to become an idol in order to be an unfilial daughter — but there was no way he could have known that.
Caught in the memory of his own past, he found himself unable to help feeling a soft spot for her.
"Well then… I'll show you my stage now."
But even that feeling cooled the instant before her performance began.
No one in this world was without a story.
Just as he had with every other contestant, Han Siwoo intended to evaluate Ha Yerin's stage with cold, rational eyes.
And so the stage began…!
"……Hmm?"
"……Huh?"
At a song choice none of them had expected, the other judges tilted their heads, question marks blooming across their faces.
And Han Siwoo…
"…Puhah!!!"
"……!!"
For the first time since the rank evaluations had started, a laugh burst across his face.
Not just any laugh — a bright, boyish smile, full of pure delight.
…Han Siwoo.
…Just laughed?
The surrounding judges, the contestants, even the production crew beyond the stage all turned to stare at him in bewilderment.
And still Han Siwoo, unable to stop the laughter once it had broken free, clutched his face and watched Ha Yerin's stage.
Woom—.
In that moment, the production staff who recovered first swung every camera onto Ha Yerin's performance.
I had lived Ha Yerin's life for nineteen years, but there were still moments from my previous life that lingered in my memory.
For example, the TV program I had watched the night before I died.
A famous terrestrial observational variety show that followed the lives of celebrities living alone.
In the episode that aired the day before my death, Han Siwoo had appeared.
Hearing that Han Siwoo was making a rare variety appearance, I had cracked open a can of beer and settled in to watch.
"People are all the same, though. How special could it be?"
That was what I thought as I took a swig.
And then…
"…What the hell is that?"
The second the camera passed through Han Siwoo's front door, I nearly spit out my beer.
The panelists on the show had the exact same reaction.
"…Wow. Siwoo-ssi. What is all of that? There are so many figures…?"
From the entryway down the hallway and into the living room — an army of figures.
The panelists reeled at a display that bordered on mania, while Han Siwoo looked bashful.
"It's a secret nobody knows, but… I'm a bit of an otaku. I especially love that anime."
"Ah~ I see. But isn't that a real nostalgia anime?"
"Yes, exactly. I used to watch it as a kid. Looking at those just… takes me right back to my childhood, you know?"
Han Siwoo said this and began to share stories from his past.
Parents who left for work early every morning and only returned late at night.
The only thing that had comforted the little boy he had been was that anime.
"Ah… I see. But what was the name of that anime again?"
At the MC's question, Han Siwoo smiled with pure, sunlit brightness — as if he had truly gone back to those days — and answered.
"Digimon Adventure!"
I sent the cue to the production crew…
Yeah, it was never going to be easy — this world I was given permission to enter~
With a soft echo over the a cappella opening, I announced the start of the stage.
Whether it was the raised stats or not, my voice was nothing like the alley-boss belting of my past life — clear, comfortable, and open.
I used it to pull the judges' and cameras' attention…
oh~ my~~ love~~
Ta~ dadada dada da~
After the first verse, the bright, driving accompaniment unique to band songs came pouring out.
I moved through a few simple dance steps with the interlude, watching the judges' reactions.
First, the ones other than Han Siwoo.
Their expressions were puzzled.
As women, they wouldn't be familiar with Digimon Adventure, a male-oriented fantasy anime. More than that, they were probably thrown off that I hadn't prepared an idol song at all.
And Han Siwoo.
"…Puhah!!!"
Fortunately, he gave me exactly the reaction I had been hoping for.
Of course he never expected to hear this song at a girl-group idol audition.
That unexpected selection must have delighted him.
Butter-Dragon, from the Digimon Adventure series.
Shall I fly away like a butterfly, carried on a gentle breeze.
I had been just as happy when I saw on that broadcast that Han Siwoo loved Digimon Adventure.
Because in my previous life, I had loved Digimon Adventure just as much.
To the introverted orphan I had been… the only friend I had was the Digimon on the orphanage's single television.
Could you even dare to know a feeling like this.
So if you're the same as me — respond. Rise up.
Louder — oh oh oh oh oh-! Can we break through the wind and rain.
If you, too, were a boy born in the nineties who had been chosen back then…
One more time — oh oh oh oh oh-! Can we take to the sky again.
If you were a comrade who once lived in that Digimon world with me.
If somewhere in this estrogen-drenched place you still held onto a boy's heart…!
Yeah, it was never going to be easy — this world I was given permission to enter~
Link with me…! Han Siwoo…!
This isn't some easy, comfortable, beautiful space you can just take for yourself.
Truthfully, for all that talk, I didn't even have room to check Han Siwoo's expression.
Because across both of my lives, this was the song I loved most.
I forgot that this was the My Idol Academia set… forgot that more than a hundred people were staring at me… and simply fell into the song.
oh my love~.
And just like that, I brought my first stage to a close.
Only near the end did I suddenly remember something my vocal trainer, Suhyeon, had once told me.
The easiest way to raise the completeness of a stage is simply to genuinely enjoy it.
In that sense, my stage had been a success.
Because in the moment I finished the final verse… I was enjoying myself more than anyone.
The other female judges, excluding Han Siwoo, had no choice but to be thoroughly thrown by Ha Yerin's song choice.
Butter-Dragon from the Digimon Adventure series.
Not an idol song — a band song. And a male band song, at that.
On top of that, Digimon Adventure was a classic male-oriented anime, so it failed to strike any real chord with them as women.
But…
"Ahahaha—!"
Faced with Han Siwoo — who until now had worn nothing but an expression of ice — laughing like a child at Ha Yerin's stage, they couldn't very well show their discomfort.
And setting aside the odd song choice…
Her singing… isn't bad.
Ha Yerin's vocal ability was solid.
Her open, clear technique landed comfortably in the ear, and her sense of rhythm was good.
She wasn't main-vocal material, but she was good enough to serve as a lead vocal in a pinch.
And then there was her expression…
Until now, Ha Yerin had shown nothing but a blank face.
Even now she was still mostly expressionless, but…
A little smile.
The occasional smile that surfaced while she sang — as if she were truly enjoying herself — carried devastating power even for the women watching.
A flower in the snow.
They said a flower blooming in the snow was the most beautiful of all… and that small smile nestled in her cold blankness only gave further wings to Ha Yerin's already overwhelming beauty.
And then the lyrics.
Yeah, it was never going to be easy — this world I was given permission to enter~
The message of never giving up no matter how hard things got resonated with the situation of every idol trainee, striking something deep in the chest.
oh my love~.
And so, with Ha Yerin's satisfied smile, the stage came to an end…
"…Hoo. That concludes my performance. Thank you."
At last, the time for evaluation arrived.
"……."
"……."
No one reached for the microphone first.
And then…
Swoosh—.
Someone snatched it up as if he had been waiting for this exact moment.
It was Han Siwoo, still wearing that bright, beaming smile.
"First of all, Trainee Ha Yerin. Why did you choose this song?"
"Ah, well…"
At Han Siwoo's question, Ha Yerin fidgeted as if embarrassed before answering.
"Honestly, I'm a huge fan of this anime…. I really wanted to sing it for my first stage."
"Ahaha—!"
Han Siwoo laughed with pure good humor at her answer and continued.
"Actually, I love Digimon a great deal myself. I'd love to have an in-depth discussion about Digimon with you someday, Yerin-yang~"
"…Then it would be my honor."
"And you sang well, too. Your tone is lovely, your technique is solid. Your sense of rhythm is good as well. It was a thoroughly enjoyable stage."
When Han Siwoo offered that evaluation, the other vocal-side judges piled on with additional praise.
"…That's right! Especially her tone — it was just so good."
"It felt like discovering a raw but beautiful gem that hasn't been fully polished yet…?"
"Especially the lack of unnecessary flourishes or bad habits — that made it even better."
Yes. One of Ha Yerin's greatest advantages was precisely that her short training period meant she had no bad habits to unlearn.
If she simply met a good trainer and kept moving forward from here, her vocal ability would only improve further.
"For only a month of practice, this level clearly shows vocal talent. Her growth potential also stands out compared to the other contestants."
Just when it seemed the evaluation would wrap up on Han Siwoo's warm praise—
"…However."
Suddenly, the tone of Han Siwoo's voice shifted. So cold it almost seemed like a dual personality.
"Trainee Ha Yerin. This isn't an idol song, is it?"
"……No."
"There were some movements here and there, but those could hardly be called dancing. Correct?"
"…That's correct."
It was true.
No one had brought it up first out of deference to Han Siwoo's mood… but there had been no dancing on Ha Yerin's stage just now.
"These days, dance is just as important for an idol as singing. No — these days, you could even say dance is more important."
Han Siwoo was a man who knew when to be soft and when not to be.
Personal taste, better-than-expected vocals, high growth potential — all of that was real… but without dance, a stage was worthless.
And so, to properly evaluate Ha Yerin's rank, he had no choice but to make this demand.
"Do you have a separate dance track prepared…?"
At Han Siwoo's midwinter-cold request, everyone swallowed hard, already sensing Ha Yerin's end.
Plenty of ordinary people could sing well.
But dance had a far higher barrier to entry than singing.
In a mere month, there was no way she could show anything beyond the level of an amateur.
"……."
As if she knew that truth herself, Ha Yerin kept her head bowed low.
"…I do have something prepared. I'll do it."
The judges could only hope that even if the stage came out a mess, she wouldn't be too devastated.
Obviously, I had never planned to freeload a rank evaluation on Digimon Adventure nostalgia alone.
As Han Siwoo said, what mattered for idols these days was dance… and there had been no dancing on my stage just now.
So when Han Siwoo newly requested a dance track…
"Do you have a separate dance track prepared…?"
"……."
I had no choice but to bow my head low.
"…Pfft."
Because I had to hold back a laugh.
The importance of dance? Of course I knew that perfectly well.
Status Window.
I quietly opened the Status Window in my mind and entered the Artistic detail stats.
The first thing that appeared was Vocal Ability.
Vocal Ability:65
Originally my Vocal Ability had been 12. I had invested 53 points into it.
I could have poured in more stats, but I had turned my eyes elsewhere.
Namely…
Dance:99
Sorry. I baited you just to show you this.
Digimon Adventure? Of course I genuinely love it.
But our shared nostalgia was really just the setup for this.