Elimination (4)
Before the ranking announcement, the waiting room was cold and heavy, like air that had frozen solid.
"My heart's pounding."
"Please, just let me scrape by."
"Don't worry. You'll make it."
Trainees from the same team, the same agency, offered each other encouragement and forced smiles onto their lips. But the tension bleeding through those smiles was impossible to hide.
Today, twenty out of fifty would be going home. Nearly half. It could be you. It could be a fellow trainee from your agency, a teammate, a roommate. This was the moment when no one's elimination would come as a surprise.
"We'll begin entry by agency."
The cameras started rolling, and everyone hung a bright smile at the corners of their mouths. Nobody wanted their last bit of screen time to end on a miserable face. Even so, a few of them couldn't keep the worry from showing in their eyes — the eyes of cattle being led to slaughter. They were smiling, brightly even, but what lived behind those smiles was the despair of a living creature waiting to die.
"It's okay. This isn't the end."
They comforted each other in advance. They all knew perfectly well that the words brought no comfort at all. The real feelings hidden behind those broadcast-ready expressions told an entirely different story.
"All right, then. We'll now reveal the rankings for the second ranking announcement ceremony."
The MC's voice rang out, and the tension in the room sank even deeper. Even breathing was done carefully, swallowed down to a whisper.
"We'll announce from twenty-ninth place, excluding thirtieth."
Here and there, trainees clasped their hands together or sat with their eyes shut, fingers locked tight. Some bit down hard on their lips as they waited. Others simply kept their heads bowed. Trying not to be nervous was impossible.
"The trainee in twenty-ninth place — she's been steadily climbing the ranks with her outstanding vocals, hasn't she?"
The moment those words landed, eyes darted around the room.
A trainee who got noticed for her vocals and has been climbing steadily?
A handful of names flickered through everyone's minds. But "steadily climbing" also meant her previous ranking had been low. And from that narrowed field of candidates—
"Kang Se-rin!"
Gasps and applause erupted the instant her name was called. Se-rin sat there blankly for a beat, then stood a second too late and hurried forward in a fluster. She still looked completely dazed, and only seemed to come back to herself when the microphone was placed in her hands. Then, all at once, her eyes grew wet.
"This time I'd really made my peace with it, you know. I was thinking I'd just go back and practice even harder, so I was actually pretty relaxed, and then…"
Se-rin finally broke into tears. Her crying seemed to infect everyone watching. The lower-ranked trainees, especially, looked like they felt every word. They were probably all thinking something similar.
The rankings continued, and tearful remarks kept spilling out one after another. Even the trainees who were usually nothing but sunshine couldn't hide what they felt in this moment. Every single one of them meant it.
"The trainee in fourteenth place is…"
More than half the rankings had been announced now, and some of the trainees who still hadn't been called were starting to let go of hope. Others, seeing that seats still remained, clung to a small flicker of expectation.
"I'd take thirtieth. I really would."
"God, this is killing me."
"Please…"
Hope and resignation crossed in the air, and something unexpected caught my attention. Only four seats left — and neither Eun-bi unnie nor Han Yu-ri had been called yet.
Eun-bi unnie had always held a solid ranking, but she'd never broken into the very top. Whether she could claim one of the remaining seats was anyone's guess. If she slipped, she could slide all the way to thirtieth — or straight out of the show.
Looking at who's left, it's not impossible.
She'd gotten a good edit last time. That was probably what had lifted her. I tried to settle the unease in my chest.
Eun-bi unnie aside, Han Yu-ri is the one I'm really worried about…
Yu-ri had ranked low, but she'd always felt like a stable presence — the kind of trainee you somehow assumed would never actually go home. The remaining seats, though, were four spots in the upper ranks and thirtieth place. Honestly, I couldn't picture her suddenly landing inside the top four.
They didn't even give her a surviving edit. There's no way she climbs that far.
So then… was Yu-ri actually going home this time?
A bad feeling began to stir in a corner of my chest.
Fourth place was announced, and still neither of their names was called. The anxiety climbed all the way to my throat. No matter how stable a trainee Yu-ri had been, running the numbers on the seats left, she could genuinely be eliminated.
"The trainee in third place — a lot of the girls have said she feels like the youngest."
The moment I heard that introduction, I let out a breath I hadn't realized I was holding. Only then did I understand just how tense I'd been.
They said she feels like the youngest, which means she isn't actually the youngest. That position is Eun-bi unnie's and no one else's.
If the actual youngest came out after a setup like that, I might not be able to keep my face together. I braced myself just in case.
"Baek Eun-bi!"
Thankfully, it was Eun-bi unnie's name. She walked up onto the stage, gripped the microphone firmly, and delivered her remarks in a calm, even voice.
"Thank you so much for all your support. I'll show you how much more I can grow!"
It was a sturdy, tear-free statement. Anyone who'd been watching this show would have known that not crying didn't mean she felt nothing.
And now only three announcements remained. First place. Second place. And thirtieth.
A certainty spread through the trainees who were left. The certainty that they were going home. And as if to lock that certainty in place, the screen displayed the faces of the two candidates for first.
Mine, and Na-bin's.
Exactly as everyone had expected.
"Yu Na-bin, do you think you can hold on to first place again this time?"
"I don't think so. When I saw Seo-yeon unnie's arrangement during the last position evaluation, all I could do was sit there in awe."
I let out a small laugh. The MC naturally turned his gaze toward me.
"Then I'll ask Lee Seo-yeon the same thing. Do you think you can take first this time?"
"No. It was on the broadcast — during the dance position evaluation, I couldn't even close my mouth watching Na-bin."
A voice cut in from behind us.
"What are you two even doing right now?"
The atmosphere loosened all at once. Even among the trainees who were all but certain they were going home, laughter rippled through. The MC burst out laughing too, then picked back up.
"Well, I have a feeling any more questions will just turn even pinker, so let's announce second place."
He let the pause hang for a moment, then opened his mouth again.
"In second place — Yu Na-bin!"
A split of reactions — some surprised, some who'd seen it coming. Through all of it, Na-bin stepped onto the stage with a radiant smile.
"Thank you for your support! I'll put on even better stages for everyone who voted for me!"
The MC jumped straight to a question.
"You dropped one rank. How does that feel?"
"Right now I'm nothing but grateful! I'll be happy as long as I make the debut lineup! Thank you!"
A clean finish, very Na-bin.
And now, only first place was left. The MC turned his eyes to me.
"You were second at the last ranking announcement, and this time you've reclaimed first. We have to hear how you feel, don't we?"
"I think I ended up in first because the broadcast showed a lot of pretty, positive sides of me."
At that, the trainees' expressions shifted slightly. But I didn't stop.
"Honestly, there were a lot of moments when I was framed through my abilities even in situations where I shouldn't have been in the spotlight… so I feel a little embarrassed, too."
That was the honest truth. I understood perfectly well, in my head, that screen time could never be distributed fairly.
"Even so, I'm so grateful to everyone who voted. I think doing well is how I repay those votes, and I'll work hard not to let anyone down."
I slowly looked around. Every trainee who had been part of this program came into view.
"Lastly — I wouldn't dare claim to speak for every trainee here, but every single person I've seen on this show was carrying a light of their own."
My voice grew steadier.
"The friends who didn't get much screen time are all so charming, and there isn't a bad person among them… so even after the show ends, if you could keep showing them interest and support, I'd be really grateful."
I knew. I had no idea how many people would actually go looking just because I'd said this. Probably a tiny handful, if that. But if even a handful did… that was enough.
"A wonderful speech, very Lee Seo-yeon. And that even voice of hers is making the trainees cry all over again."
Hearing the MC say that, I looked and saw that most of the trainees whose names hadn't been called were in tears.
I really wasn't aiming for that.
Even after first place had been announced, the atmosphere was anything but light. If anything, the tension pulled even tighter. Only one seat remained.
"Then we'll reveal the candidates for our final survivor — thirtieth place."
The screen flickered the moment he said it, and two faces filled the display.
Han Yu-ri. Park Hye-in.
My heart dropped.
…So one of them is going home.
The two on the screen were wearing clear, bright smiles. Park Hye-in faced forward with a sturdy expression, and Han Yu-ri was grinning like the sun. What were they thinking? What were they feeling?
I had no way of knowing.