Heehee! Fire the General Cannon!
Heehee! General cannon fire!
“Cough cough! That crazy bastard! Setting rice sacks on fire for a smoke screen?! What a shitty way to fight a war!”
“One! Cough! Hey! One! Ready to fire!”
“Everyone, throw the Molotovs! Hey! Throw the goddamn Molotovs, you sons of bitches!”
Bang! Bbang! Bang!
“Wh-whoa! Hey! They’re shooting! Duck your heads! Duck, I said! Duck—”
Crack!
Well, shit. The sky’s spinning like crazy.
Lying flat on the cool ground, staring up, the sky was swirling on its own. Spinning in place like I’d just flopped down drunk in broad daylight.
Wait, did I even drink?
No, why the hell am I on the ground?
And why’s the sky all hazy like that? It was crystal clear just a minute ago.
Weird.
“……!”
As I blankly gazed at the sky, Sergeant I Cheol-dong’s face swam into view. Not his usual stoic mug, either. His iron-man face was twisted in shock and horror, totally out of character.
He shoved that grim visage right in my face, mouth flapping silently like he was yelling something. Then, like he’d hit unmute, his voice suddenly blasted through.
“……sir! Are you alive, sir?!”
Does he think I’m dead or something?
“Platoon leader!”
Sergeant I Cheol-dong whipped his head around at the urgent, out-of-left-field shout from the soldier he’d been talking to.
“What do we do, sir! The Japs are coming in one by one!”
“Nngh! Right! First Squad holds as planned! You, help me carry him!”
“A-are you… alive, sir?”
“Of course! I’m just playing dead for the medic!”
Sergeant I Cheol-dong and the soldier each grabbed one of my arms and hauled me up. A breeze grazed my scalp then, and I realized I wasn’t wearing my helmet.
“N-no, my… my helmet. My helmet…”
“H-huh? What’s that?”
“My noggin guard. My lid. My helmet…”
“It’s smashed! Can’t use it!”
Smashed? How the hell does a steel helmet smash?
“Damn it, seriously!”
The soldier supporting my right arm yanked off his own and jammed it on my head.
“Why’d you take a bullet to the skull, sir! You had us worried sick!”
Me? I took a bullet? To the head?
What the fuck are they talking about? A headshot kills you. I’m fine right now. Kinda dizzy and can’t stand straight, but still.
“Don’t worry! The platoon leader’s alive! The bullet just grazed his forehead and knocked him out!”
Sergeant I Cheol-dong bellowed it as he and the soldier dragged me along, addressing everyone around.
Soldiers firing from the wall’s gun ports, hurling Molotovs over the ramparts, reloading with shaking hands—they all stopped and stared at me. Their eyes brimmed with fear and worry.
Why’re they looking at me like that? Like someone died?
I’m fine. Totally fine. Not dying. See? I can walk.
“Nngh…”
“Don’t tense up, sir! You’ll collapse!”
Fine. Whatever. If they say don’t, I won’t.
With my arms slung over Sergeant I Cheol-dong and the soldier, we descended the wall. Dragging my feet down the stairs, I caught sight of the chaos in the open space between the gate and HQ building.
“Fire! Commence!”
Boom! Bboom!
“Argh!”
Second Squad was hunkered behind cover at the HQ’s main entrance, laying down three-round bursts toward the gate. Not super effective with only three-man teams firing in rotation, but enough to pin the enemy down. Especially with those bamboo rafts and taketaba blocking the path—it made it way easier.
Hold up. We’re in the middle of a fight right now?
We’d just finished prepping the plan. Did time skip or what? Am I Kim Si-jin, the time traveler?
Aghhh.
“@#$&!”
“*&^%$#!”
“Fuck.”
Japanese shouts rang out nearby. Sergeant I Cheol-dong, supporting my left, bolted forward.
Two Japs charging with swords raised—the ones who’d slipped in earlier, probably. He kept them at bay with his bayonet-tipped musket, yelling at the soldier still holding me up alone.
“Get the platoon leader out of here! Hurry!”
What the hell’s he doing? Is he nuts? That’s not how you do it!
My head cleared in a flash. I lifted my limp left hand, grabbed the collar of the soldier propping my right arm, yanked him down, and tripped him forward.
With my right hand free, I drew my revolver from my belt and aimed at the Japs. Gripping the trigger, I cocked the hammer repeatedly with my left.
Bbang-bbang-bbang-bbang!
Fired all five rounds in one go. The two charging sword-swingers crumpled, blood spraying from faces and chests.
I waved away the hazy gunsmoke cloud and yelled,
“Hey, Sergeant I! You gonna take that revolver home as a souvenir? Why aren’t you using it!”
I gave him that thing not long ago! Why’s he just poking at them with a musket?!
“P-platoon leader!”
Sergeant I Cheol-dong gawked at me through the smoke, eyes wide.
“A-are you okay, sir?!”
The soldier I’d tripped teared up.
“Woo! The platoon leader’s alive!”
“Of course! No way he’d go down! That man comes back from the dead!”
“We win again this time tooooo!”
Soldiers on the walls, watchtowers, and HQ entrance cheered as they watched me.
I shouted back at them,
“Hey! Snap out of it! You wanna get shot and die?!”
Why’re they acting like that? Anyone’d think I rose from the grave.
“Platoon leader! You alright, sir?!”
Sergeant I Cheol-dong approached, clutching his matchlock two-handed. I nodded on reflex, then winced as a splitting headache hit—like my skull was cracking open.
“Nngh, what the—!”
As I grimaced, a different pain followed—not deep in my brain, but on the surface…
“Ah! Hiss, what the hell!”
Probing under the helmet, I felt a small lump on my forehead. Brushing it made tears well up.
“Ughhh…!”
My vision blurred, legs buckled.
“L-let’s get you inside first, sir!”
“Give me your arm, sir!”
“No! Hold on!”
I shoved the soldier off and ordered Sergeant I Cheol-dong,
“You, get back up there now! What’re you doing here? You’ll get the whole platoon killed!”
“Y-yes, sir! Right away!”
His lip twitched for a second, then he nodded sharply and raced back to the wall.
Only after watching him go did I let the soldier help me into HQ.
That’s when I heard what I’d forgotten up till now.
A bit before lunch, the Japs torched rice sacks for a smoke screen.
They charged the fortress through it.
I took a musket ball to the head.
“I-I didn’t die, though?”
“Yes, sir! We thought you had!”
Guess the helmet saved me. Price was this concussion, but better than that Jap commander yesterday whose head exploded.
At least my handsome face is intact.
“Ah, wait. I’m feeling better now.”
By the time we reached HQ, strength was returning. I shook off the soldier and walked on my own, ordering,
“Head back to the front.”
“Yes, sir!”
“Hurry. No time for chit-chat.”
As the soldier hurried off, I staggered down the HQ corridor. Gunfire and shouts echoed nonstop toward the main entrance.
Second Squad was still holding with three-round bursts. I went to the squad leader at the rear and asked,
“Hey! Status!”
“Platoon leader! Your injuries—”
“I’m fine, just spit it out! Status!”
“Ammo’s almost gone—”
Ding-ding-ding-ding-ding!
Before he finished, bells pealed across the fortress. My pounding head aside, my heart raced.
It’s time.
“Pull Second Squad back!”
“Yes, sir! Second Squad, fall back! Fall back!”
Second Squad retreated swiftly. First Squad on the wall pulled to the flanks for cover. Third Squad in the watchtower… couldn’t see from here.
Anyway, I joined the retreating Second Squad and approached the object inside the main entrance.
I whipped off the cover, revealing the operation’s final weapon.
It was too big to call a gun. Massive, thick, and crude as hell.
This was a proper cannon.
The fortress had more than just matchlocks and six-shooters.
The Heavenly Sovereign Cannon. The biggest, thickest bore among the Heavenly, Earthly, Mysterious, and Imperial Cannons.
Used for signals till now, but today was different.
Loaded not just with powder and wooden tamp, but hundreds of lead balls and big iron ones too.
“@#$%^&!”
“*&^%@!”
“@#$%^&*!”
The Japs waiting outside surged around the taketaba.
I patted the Heavenly Sovereign Cannon—good luck—and fell back.
“Second Squad leader! Fire!”
“Yes, sir!”
He was also the gunner. Lit a match, touched it to the fuse. It sparked yellow and caught.
I followed the troops into the corridor, eyes squeezed shut, ears plugged, waiting for the boom.
Heehee! General cannon fire!
……Huh? Why’s it so quiet?
KABOOOOOM‼!
Fuck! How much powder did they pack in there?!
The building shook like it’d collapse; I tumbled over. Concussion flared again, but I crawled to the entrance.
Beyond the doors: pure white smoke.
A breeze cleared it, revealing the carnage.
“Gaaaah!”
“Urk, puke!”
“Guh, guh!”
Over half the surging Japs were gone. Not in headcount—their bodies blown apart.
The plaza was a blood sea; chunks of Jap littered everywhere. They twitched on the ground, missing at least a limb each.
Thud, splat, patter-patter.
Then soft red bits rained down like hail.
Besides acrid powder smoke, the stench of blood assaulted my nose.
Fuck. Shouldn’t have looked.
“Urp—blegh!”
Regret hit as I emptied my guts.
I knew instantly: I’d never forget that sight.
“Cough, hack! Urp—blegh! Ugh, g-get up, everyone!”
Vomiting again but forcing myself up, stepping in puke, I yelled at the troops in the corridor.
“Now! Drive the Japs out now! Get up! Hurry! Get up, I said!”
Shaking hands worse than ever, I swapped the revolver’s cylinder for a fresh one.
Meantime, the soldiers rose, ready to charge.
Revolver in left, I drew the royal sword from my belt with right.
“……!”
Deep breath in that bloody air would trigger more puking, so I skipped it. Nodded to the troops and Second Squad leader instead, then bellowed as I charged the entrance.
“Everyone! Charge!”
Come on! Follow me! If you don’t, I’m dead meat!
“Raaagh!”
“Die, you Jap bastards!”
“Dieeee!”
Luckily, Second Squad roared and followed.
But… do we even need to charge?
No Japs left to fight. They huddled trembling or fled, stepping on their buddies’ flesh. Some even jumped back over the wall they’d climbed.
Suddenly, me and Second Squad halted in the plaza.
Victory was obvious, but no cheers amid the cannon’s gruesome handiwork.
Still, whatever. We won.
Winning’s what matters. Surviving’s enough.
Ignoring my churning guts, I yelled,
“Hey! Did we lose?! We won, damn it! Celebrate! Why’re you all at a funeral?!”
I was the only one screaming in the fortress.
“Whole platoon! Whole platoon, attention! Look at me!”
Bang! Bang!
Fired into the air to grab their eyes.
Thinking of the Japs fleeing beyond the wall, I shouted,
“Whole platoon! Face forward! Mighty cheer! Fire! Raaaaagh!”
“Raaaaagh!”
“We won, you Jap bastards!”
“Woooo!”
Finally felt like victors. The Joseon troops forgot the horror for a moment, roaring their joy at victory and survival.
Watching them cheer amid the slaughter, I thought: This is the last time we fight here.