Embodied Subjectivity
Others are beings impossible to comprehend. I never meant to take the words to heart, but there were just too many moments when I found myself nodding in agreement... Perhaps they've become my personal motto, in their own way.
Even for someone like me, who never enjoyed human relationships, interactions with others were unavoidable. And so the days dragged on, me lost in a daze, mulling over that motto. In the end, after wracking my brain for an answer, the truth turned out to be surprisingly simple.
Clang! Someone's blade went flying.
"Not by understanding them—but by forcing them to understand."
"You crazy bitch... Gaaahhh!"
Schwick!
The Execution Sword in my hand fell downward. "Fell" is the accurate term. It wasn't swung so much as simply released. The only issue was the man waiting beneath it.
Thud.Plip. Plip...
Blood sprayed in all directions. The red liquid settled quietly on my cheek, my eyelashes, the collar of my white uniform.
Warm.
One of the first truths I'd learned since arriving in this world. Fresh blood runs far hotter than you'd expect.
Schling...
I lifted the Execution Sword with ease. The clumps clinging to the blade slid slowly to the ground.
And just like that, one subjectivity—gone from the world.
'...What kind of eyes did you use to see the world?'
People differ in height, in eyesight, in preconceptions. That's why embodied subjectivity matters. And that's why, now that my body has changed, thoughts like this creep in.
'If my body hadn't changed.'
Could I have done something this brutal? Through the eyes of a modern man... Probably not.
"The judgment is over."
I planted the sword point-down into the earth.
Thud.
The vibration rippled outward, and the nearby soldiers flinched. Their eyes, their faces—all carried the same raw emotion.
Fear. Revulsion. Terror.
Leaning on the hilt, I slowly swept my gaze over them. The soldier whose eyes met mine ducked his head in haste. I heard the gulp of a dry swallow.
...Hah.
'They couldn't subjugate the target themselves, so they called me all the way out here—why the drama?'
As I've said all along... others are impossible to understand.