Fake 'Your Excellency' (4)
Im Jui bowed at the waist in greeting, then stepped out beyond the barrier. The cult leader backed away, and the fake Ragged Wanderer and the real one faced off.
The size difference was staggering: the fake, a hulking brute over two meters tall, towered over Im Jui, who stood under 160 cm. She craned her neck to look up at him, like two fighters staring each other down nose-to-nose before a total combat match. After about ten seconds of tense silence, the fake struck first.
"Th-the Excellency is G-God's proxy!"
His words came out slurred in a tongue too clumsy for his massive frame as he swung a fist straight at Im Jui's face. There was a sickening crack as it connected, something shattering—but Im Jui took no damage. Her gas mask exploded into fragments that clattered to the ground. Not a scratch marred her face, and even after taking that straight punch dead-on, her neck didn't budge a millimeter. She just kept staring up at him.
"Evangelist! No fooling around—finish this quick!"
The cult leader retreated another step, shouting, but the fake faltered, stunned that his blow had done nothing. Im Jui raised her arm slightly, and he scrambled backward. She slipped the arm into her pocket instead, pulling out her notepad and pen to scribble something.
Your Excellency, should I capture this one alive too?
"Yeah, take him alive. I've got some questions for him. If he resists too much, feel free to break a few bones."
Your Excellency, proceeding as ordered.
Im Jui pocketed the notepad and advanced slowly on the fake, who backpedaled in panic. He'd instinctively sensed the gulf in their power. Now it was time for the real deal to show its class.
"D-don't come closer! Ex-Excellency! R-run!"
His judgment utterly shattered, he shrieked and flailed a punch at Im Jui—but she caught his wrist and snapped it like a twig. Crack!
"Ex-Excellency! Aaaargh!"
Gripping his broken arm, Im Jui drove a low kick into his leg. Bones ground to pulp, and he crumpled to the ground.
"R-run!"
Something about the fake had been nagging at me from the start. His childlike speech and weird screams didn't match that giant frame at all.
"No way..."
Han Seol whispered in my ear.
"Your Excellency, the fake Ragged Wanderer seems... a bit simple."
"Yeah, I was thinking the same."
Han Byeol pointed at the fake and yelled.
"Master! Doesn't that guy seem kinda dumb?"
"Byeol! You can't just shout that kind of thing."
"Still, his head grows better than yours."
"Ah! Master! We agreed to forget that incident!"
"How could I forget? Your sister spent all night fixing it just to save him."
Overhearing us, the fake staggered to his feet on his mangled leg and let out a roar.
"I-I'm not! N-not dumb! Sniff! F-fucking bastards!"
"Evangelist! Calm down!"
The cult leader tried to intervene, but too late. Im Jui's fist slammed into the fake's gut, and he dropped unconscious. No crunch of crushed organs this time— she'd pulled her punch.
Im Jui nudged his head with her boot a few times to check, then looked to me and bowed.
"Truly the Governor. Most satisfactory."
My home's pride, my ultimate trump card.
"Evangelist... what the hell..."
Im Jui approached the shell-shocked cult leader and held out her notepad.
Will you kneel before His Excellency on your own? Or should I make you?
The cult leader couldn't meet her eyes, his legs trembling, until he dropped to his knees before me and murmured.
"I don't know who you are, but it's all my fault. I'm sorry. Please show mercy."
"Now we can have a proper talk. I've got a lot of questions for you. I hate repeating myself, so listen well and answer carefully."
He didn't dare lift his head, just prostrated himself, shaking.
"Name."
"Park Tae-woo."
"Age."
"Thirty-one."
"Occupation."
"C-cult leader."
"Good. I was gonna kill you if you were some lunatic who actually believed his own God-proxy bullshit, but you seem self-aware. Lucky you."
Park Tae-woo knew damn well he was running a scam.
"You can make bread and water—do it right here in front of me."
"I-I stopped by the church this morning before coming here and made some already. I have to wait a full day to make more."
"Hm... water?"
"Th-that takes a day too..."
"Ah, maybe I should just kill you..."
"It's true! Let me explain my ability!"
I glanced at Kim Dae-geon, who nodded silently. No lie there.
Park Tae-woo's power created bread and purified contaminated water—but they were linked. Purify too much water, and you couldn't make as much bread. Make too much bread, no water purification.
"So if you skip water and focus on bread, how much per day?"
"Around seven hundred loaves."
"Definitely an ability people would fall for. And in exchange, you had young, pretty women offering themselves up?"
"No, they came willingly."
"Yeah, probably just desperate for an extra slice of bread or bowl of soup."
Whenever his answers felt off, Kim Dae-geon chimed in with verification and details. Putting it together, aside from the sex tributes, there weren't major issues. No looting civilians—hell, they looted the looters instead. Even the tributes seemed genuine from the believers' perspective, per Kim Dae-geon.
This morning, after his subordinate visited, they'd held an executive meeting about capturing and executing the cult leader. Surprisingly, the Han sisters suggested using him instead.
From the Reconstruction Government on, I'd made too many enemies lately. It was making me uneasy. My barrier was near-invincible, but Special Awakeners had all sorts of powers. What if one could neutralize it even briefly? The thought chilled me.
Until full self-sufficiency and stronger weapons—like farms, hospitals, and new attack drones—I wanted to stay low. The sisters got it and proposed capturing guys like this: if they talked sense, use them.
"Fine, whatever. I'm not feeding your people, so whining about tribute sex is kinda funny. We'll skip that."
"Then I..."
"No, you're dying here today. Any last words? Skip the clichéd 'my followers will starve if I die' crap."
He bowed his head slowly, then met my eyes. No fear—resigned to death.
"One last request."
"I said last words, not requests. But I'll hear it."
"Kill me if you must, but spare the evangelist lying there."
"Why?"
"You must've noticed—he's... just an idiot. Simple-minded. Follows me around believing I'm a god. He did nothing wrong. Kill me, spare him."
"Getting sentimental now? Think that'll guilt me into mercy?"
"No. Please. Kill me here, let him live. With him around, looters won't touch my followers."
He removed his wooden crown, slamming his forehead to the asphalt. I looked to Han Seol; she nodded silently. Useful guy. Minus the lechery, he cleared all my benchmarks. Just wanted to feed people with his power and get worshipped. No grand ambitions beyond that—made him all the more controllable.
"Head up."
I approached the barrier, squatting to look down at him.
"Enough water, and you can make seven hundred loaves a day? I'll supply the water. Tell Kim Dae-geon to deliver a hundred barrels of clean water weekly. That evangelist's an Awakener; a few days' rest, and he'll heal."
Park Tae-woo's face twisted in confusion.
"Why...?"
"In exchange, swear loyalty to me."
"Y-yes? I swear! I swear!"
"Words are worthless, but I'll take your word once. You're officially my slave now. Got it?"
"Understood."
"Good. Here's your job: When the fake Ragged Wanderer wakes, say you smote them with divine power. From now on, aggressively promote yourself as 'Your Excellency', 'Lord of Paradise'. No looting—share food with the poor. Clear?"
"Yes, understood."
"Kim Dae-geon will explain details when he takes you back. Report in person every two weeks via his car."
"Yes..."
Park Tae-woo was my shield now. People seeking the mysterious "Your Excellency" would meet him, realize the infinite water and power rumors were fake, and either leave disappointed or join his flock. I'd pull strings from the shadows.
As I stood, he asked.
"May I call you my lord?"
"Time you figured it out, huh? You're smart. I figured you clocked it when the little gas-masked girl flattened your buddy."
"Then... no way."
Han Byeol stepped forward, glaring down at him with contempt.
"From now on, address him as 'Your Excellency' and show respect."
Park Tae-woo's face hardened. The resolve to die vanished, replaced by terror.
"N-no way, you're..."
I summoned four drones, deploying their plasma cutters around him. Sizzle-crack! They sliced his wooden crown cleanly in half.
"Don't want to wake up as a corpse in some naked devotee's arms come morning? Keep your head down."
"Ah... aah! It really exists...!"
I squatted before him again, meeting his eyes.
"You've become 'Your Excellency' now."