Chapter 85
Chapter 85
-----------------------------------------------------------------
Translator: Vine
Chapter: 85
Chapter Title: What's Important is an Unbreaking Mind
-----------------------------------------------------------------
When my mind was in great turmoil, time seemed to pass strangely fast.
I barely registered how I had managed to respond to others or handle the situation, yet time seemed to flow rapidly, as if refusing to grant me any more leeway.
“…”
Before I knew it, it was well past noon.
I was no longer sitting on the infirmary bed. Quite the opposite, in fact.
*Huu, huu.*
My eyes fell upon Millia, sleeping on the bed with soft, gentle breaths. As she stirred, her dark hair shifted slightly, and my gaze lingered on it blankly.
Seeing that brought it all back to me.
‘…So it was true that she stayed up all night by my side.’
A commotion had erupted in the infirmary when Luna visited around lunchtime. Millia had somehow managed to soothe a deeply worried Luna and send her away. Afterward, Millia had fallen asleep as if utterly exhausted.
And so, very naturally.
I found myself watching over the sleeping Millia.
Just as she had done for me last night, it felt right for me to stay by her side, even for a little while. Besides, considering Millia’s position, I couldn’t just return to the afternoon lectures alone.
“Cadet Han Cheon-seong. What are you thinking about right now?”
“…Pardon?”
“You’re not having any naughty thoughts looking at the sleeping Cadet Millia, are you?”
When Adelia threw a mischievous joke my way, I was no longer as flustered as I had been at first.
“Instructor. How could I possibly think something like that?”
“Really? I just thought you were staring so intently, you might have had some ulterior motives.”
Even though Instructor Adelia spoke with a bright smile, that one word stuck with me.
‘Ulterior motives.’
To be honest, I couldn’t say I had none at all.
Millia, whom I had considered my ideal type from the moment I first saw her, was showing such a defenseless side to me. It wasn't as if my eyes didn't stray toward her.
“Still, how should I put it? It’s really nice to see you two watching over each other like this, worrying about one another.”
“It’s less about worry and more… that it feels like the right thing to do.”
“The right thing… It doesn’t seem that way to me at all, which is why I’m saying that even a response like that from you, Cadet Han Cheon-seong, is nice to see.”
At Adelia’s subsequent words, I let out a small smile and looked at Millia again.
“You know, Cadet Han Cheon-seong. It’s been just over a year since I returned to the academy, but in that time, I feel like I’ve seen a great number of cadets. Cadets with diverse values and different ways of thinking, all living their lives fiercely.”
“…Cadets living fiercely, you say.”
I replied distractedly, but I didn't neglect Adelia's words.
“Yes. That’s right. Everyone is so obsessed with competition these days, so conscious of one another, that it’s truly rare to see cadets who genuinely care for each other. Of course, it’s not that they don’t exist, but it feels like no one has the capacity for it. It’s as if they have a compulsion to be better than other cadets and achieve high grades. In fact… this academy itself constantly discriminates among its students. So, in a way, it’s a natural outcome.”
I listened to her calm voice without a word.
While a cadet’s effort is a matter of personal capability, the Grand Royal Academy relentlessly pushed its students from all sides, practically forcing them to strive.
To avoid falling behind other cadets, you had to work hard yourself. To receive better treatment, you had to develop your traits. Because of this, nearly everything was subject to discrimination.
Even something as simple as food was priced, the living conditions of the dormitories, the use of training facilities—everything was strictly segregated by class. Even instructors often treated cadets differently based on their grades.
It was a natural outcome, perhaps. But as Adelia said, it seemed they were being pushed excessively to compete with one another.
“So, while there are cadets who visit an injured friend out of concern, I myself have only seen a few who would go as far as to skip lectures to stay by their side, or even pull an all-nighter. That’s why the more I look at you, Cadet Han Cheon-seong, and Cadet Millia, the more fascinating you both are.”
A faint smile escaped my lips at her kind words.
‘I’m not doing anything that special.’
It seemed Adelia saw my actions in a positive light. Then again, maybe what I was doing wasn’t so ordinary after all.
Even within the same class, only a handful of students could advance to the next class each year. The number of students who could advance was strictly limited to three.
Even that seemed designed to make them compete. And if the examiner deemed them below standard, they wouldn't even fill the three slots, and that would be the end of it.
Then… my gaze fell blankly on Millia.
“I don’t quite understand Millia.”
Amidst my confused thoughts, I inadvertently voiced my feelings.
“Cadet Millia?”
“Yes… It would have been enough for her to just bring me to the infirmary. But to hear she stayed by my side all night… I’m grateful, but I can’t quite understand it.”
If someone asked if Millia and I were that close, I would have said no.
I remembered having a pleasant conversation after I approached her once. But we hadn't had any significant interactions since then. We were merely acquaintances who exchanged light greetings when we passed each other.
If anything, I had been focusing on Luna. I was concentrated on her trait, Battle Cure, a healing trait that would later be so highly regarded it was called overpowered.
That was why I had deliberately paid Millia little attention. Even if she was my ideal type, I tried not to show any interest.
‘Because Luna doesn’t want me to get close to Millia.’
But now, with the situation being what it was, I couldn't ignore her.
Why… did Millia stay by my side all night? I had felt a strange emotion at first, and even now, I didn't know how I should see Millia.
I knew she was showing me favor and kindness. But I had accepted it as something stemming from her good nature.
‘But is staying by my side all night really something I should just accept like that?’
That kept bothering me. Unless I was mistaken…
Suddenly, I recalled the moment Kalli had left.
—*Excuse me for a moment.*
Millia had approached me without hesitation.
—*It’s nothing… I was just bothered by how your hair was messy. Was it unpleasant?*
Afterward, she had immediately pulled her hand away, her cheeks flushing as if embarrassed.
“……”
I swallowed the sigh that rose to my throat.
It felt like my heart was constantly being swayed. No matter how much I tried to steady myself, someone else would do something to shake my resolve, as if they were testing me.
Even when I tried not to misunderstand, the situation itself seemed to be creating the misunderstanding.
“…”
When Adelia remained silent, I cautiously turned my head.
Our eyes met, and she looked a little surprised, making me wonder if I had done something startling.
“Instructor Adelia?”
“Ah… Yes?”
“You suddenly went quiet. Did I say something strange?”
I had asked Adelia how Millia’s actions might look from an outsider’s perspective.
“No. It wasn’t strange, I was just thinking a little more about Cadet Millia.”
“In that case. Instructor, what do you think of Millia’s actions? How should I take them?”
I asked blankly. I didn’t want to just gloss over this situation.
I hoped I wasn’t just misunderstanding and getting my hopes up alone. I wanted to confirm if this time, I could really believe that Millia had feelings for me.
“I think it’s… entirely possible.”
“Possible…”
But the answer was different from what I had expected, and I was momentarily at a loss for words. Immediately after, Adelia smiled.
“Cadet Millia found you unconscious while taking a walk in the park at night, right? And from your conversation after you woke up, it seems you’re already close… So it’s possible she stayed up all night by your side out of worry. And from what I’ve seen, Cadet Millia has a very kind heart.”
At her following words, I simply nodded blankly.
Honestly, I had hoped Adelia would say that Millia had a crush on me, or had feelings for me.
Then… I could change my attitude toward Millia in the future.
“Cadet Han Cheon-seong. Be honest. You were hoping I’d say Cadet Millia had personal feelings for you, weren’t you?”
Her words hit the nail on the head, and I could only manage an awkward laugh. Embarrassment, shame, and humiliation mingled in my heart, but I couldn't deny it.
“…Yes. I was honestly hoping for that.”
“I think it’s perfectly understandable for you to feel that way. A cute and pretty cadet from your own class stayed up all night worrying about you. Of course you’d think that way.”
Adelia’s subsequent words felt like a contradiction.
‘Then why…’
Why did Adelia give me an answer so different from what I had hoped for?
Her explanation that it was a combination of Millia’s kind nature and the circumstances certainly made sense. But she could have just as easily said Millia had feelings for me.
“…”
As I met her gaze, Adelia suddenly raised her hand.
I blinked blankly at her hand, and she came right up to me.
*Grab.*
“…Instructor Adelia?”
“Really, Cadet Han Cheon-seong… Looking at me with such expectant eyes. Is it okay to look so cute?”
She pinched my cheek and started to fiddle with it, leaving me dumbfounded. Calling me cute out of nowhere.
“Anyway, I answered cautiously because I believe it’s a possibility. If I had answered as you wished and said Cadet Millia had personal feelings for you, your eyes looked like you were about to confess to her on the spot. And my words might not be the correct answer. If that were the case, both you and Cadet Millia would be in a very awkward situation, wouldn't you?”
Adelia’s words made me realize how shortsighted I had been.
For a moment, I had intended to rely completely on someone else’s opinion.
I should have considered the possibility that the opinion might not be correct, but for a moment, I had been ready to accept Adelia's words as gospel.
“…I’m sorry, Instructor.”
“No. Why is this something to apologize for? And I really like this cautious and thoughtful attitude of yours, Cadet Han Cheon-seong. That’s why you’re asking for my opinion so cutely right now, isn’t it?”
*Fiddle, fiddle.*
As she continued to play with my cheek, I accepted her actions with an awkward smile.
…
The time I spent by Millia’s side, enduring Adelia’s teasing, continued. At one point, Adelia had to leave when an injured student came in, but I still didn’t leave Millia’s side.
Once I had sorted out my feelings, I felt a pure sense of gratitude toward Millia.
Before feeling any romantic attraction to her for being close to my ideal type, I understood how much goodwill was behind her various actions toward me.
*Ssk.*
And as three in the afternoon, the end of the afternoon lectures, approached, I slowly got up.
“Are you heading back now?”
“Yes. It feels a bit odd to wait until Millia wakes up.”
…Millia might have stayed by my side out of pure, selfless concern, but I didn’t think I could be as pure-hearted as her.
“Instructor Adelia. Thank you so much for everything today.”
“Of course. And Cadet Han Cheon-seong. It’s one thing to come here injured next time, but don’t come in unconscious like today, alright? That startles me too.”
I habitually slung the spear onto my back. I had to head to the training grounds. I had wasted too much of my time today.
“Don’t tell me, Cadet Han Cheon-seong. Are you planning to train again today?”
“I won’t overdo it.”
“Haa… If you end up back in the infirmary unconscious, I’m going to be really angry. Be prepared for that, okay?”
Looking at Adelia, who seemed to think I was hopeless, I smiled.
“If that happens again, please scold me harshly then.”
“…Cadet Han Cheon-seong. Is that really the right answer?”
“I’m… not confident enough to promise it won’t happen again.”
As I spoke, I realized I had been thinking about it all day.
I had thought a lot about Millia, but even more so, I knew I couldn't stop now that I had a clue about the skill.
That I had to move forward.
“…….”
I smiled at the speechless Adelia and left the infirmary.
*Click.*
As I walked out the door, I steeled my resolve.
To face reality and look toward the path ahead.
And to properly strive for what I must do from now on.
Therefore, I had to face that excruciating pain I felt yesterday once again.
I had to further solidify the concept of the skill I had barely begun to grasp.
Only then, I believed, could I save Karite with my own strength, not just by wishing and wanting.
‘If I try, if I can truly strive to reach it…’
I had faith that my will would surely be rewarded.
What’s important to me now is an unbreaking mind.
“Right. I won’t break from the pain.”