Academy Entrance Exam (2)

"Examinee number 144. To the arena."

"They're rushing me like hell."

"Hm...?"

"Nothing!"

While Charles was still doubting his own ears, I barely made it into the arena.

"Name?"

"Eugene. No surname."

"Confirmed."

After that simple identity check, just as the exam was about to begin—

"Hey, Eugene."

"Yes?"

Charles glanced around, then asked in a low voice.

"Why did you ask to have your turn delayed?"

"Because I'm going to smash it."

"Smash it? Smash what?"

I pointed at the scarecrow.

"That."

The next instant—

"Pfft."

The corner of Charles's mouth curled up in the most punchable way imaginable.

"Go on, then. Give it a try."

He said it like he was already done with the conversation, so I grabbed him in a hurry.

"If I smash the scarecrow, what will you do for me?"

"Do for you?"

"I'm proposing a bet. On whether I smash that thing or not."

"And why would I take that bet?"

Charles's tone was flat and final. I was going to smash it anyway, so I'd figured I might as well squeeze something extra out of the deal. Honestly, he had no reason to play along.

Then I'll just have to give him one.

I looked him in the eye and asked, short and sweet.

"Chicken?"

"...What is that supposed to mean?"

"I'm asking if you're chicken that I'll actually smash it."

Nothing beats a good taunt, after all.

"I am not chicken."

Charles stepped in with a dead-serious face, not so much as a flicker of expression as he continued.

"Allow me to educate you, ignorant boy. That scarecrow is the work of the former hero, Lady Vivian—"

"Chicken?"

"...Do not interrupt me. That scarecrow cannot be destroyed by any means—"

"Chicken?"

"Haa... In any case, that scare—"

"Chicken?"

"..."

Only then did Charles's face crumple.

"You..."

"You...?"

"You little bastard."

"Huh?"

Why'd he suddenly start cursing? I genuinely did not get it.

I was standing there, actually a little hurt, when Charles crushed my shoulder in his grip and whispered.

"A paltry fighter putting on paltry airs. Fine. ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠If you destroy that scarecrow, I shall revere you as I would a master."

"Ohhh."

I'd just been going to ask him to buy me a meal. He went and staked something I never even dreamed of.

"So. What will you wager, then?"

I smiled at him.

His face went rigid.

"Brat. A life is not something you wager so carelessly—"

He tried to give me some kind of advice, but—

"Sir Lumière. Do you have that much left to verify?"

"...No. We will begin."

A senior professor cut him off. Charles glared at me and spat the words.

"We'll talk after the exam."

"Sure thing, disciple."

"Haa... We will talk. We will."

I'd been hearing that a lot lately.

After a trembling Charles turned and left, I slowly approached the scarecrow. A figure of grimy, darkened straw stood ramrod-straight, impaled on a metal pole.

So this is the...

What was it called again?

I'd forgotten the name they'd given the thing, but I remembered its lore with perfect clarity. First, the creator.

Tyrant Vivian.

She had been a member of the previous generation's hero party, one of the Five Heroes of the Empire, and the author-certified strongest being in the entire world of Protect the Academy!

After the great war against the demon race ended, she had abruptly declared her retirement.

Having stepped back from the front lines, she started dabbling in this and that to kill time. And ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠just like that, she became a blacksmith.

She handed the very first masterpiece she had ever forged over to the Academy Headmaster. That masterpiece was this scarecrow.

The remaining four Heroes, the masters of the Five-Color Magic Towers, even Rania — the protagonist of the novel — none of them had ever managed to destroy it. An item forged by the strongest being in the world. Undestroyable, no matter what you tried.

That's what everyone thinks, anyway.

I let ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠out a short laugh and lifted my head.

"Shall we begin?"

"Thirty seconds left."

"For what?"

"The time limit. Twenty-eight seconds now."

"What?!"

Isn't it a sacred law of novels that time freezes around you when you inner-monologue?!

"SHIIIIIT!!"

No time to think. I lunged at the scarecrow. I'd already closed the distance — three steps was all it took to reach it.

Time to use that method.

I reached out without hesitation. I pulled the scarecrow into an embrace, like a romance scene from a movie, and opened my mouth as if whispering words of love.

"Dad. It's me. I'm Scarecrow."

The walkthrough for Vivian's masterpiece. Its name—

"Dad, ever since you left a famine hit the fields and the whole family got abandoned but here you are standing around like an idiot getting the crap beaten out of you while our family was getting turned into winter firewood and cremated and becoming fertilizer for that pig of a farm owner's vegetable patch you were here loafing around having the time of your life if I'd known it would be like this I never would have been born as your son Dad I'm burning up honey I'm burning up oh son I'm burning up too."

Get ready to cry. You're about to become a Vicious Onion.

The instant Eugene pulled the scarecrow into his arms, everyone in the exam hall had more or less the same thought.

"Did he just hug the scarecrow?"

"What the hell is he doing?"

"He stood in Lady Yuria's way, so I thought he was some kind of monster. Turns out he's just a lunatic?"

This was an exam you could barely pass giving it everything you had — and he hadn't even drawn a weapon. He'd gone in for a hug. It was eccentricity of the highest order.

"Tsk. That's enough. Let's move on."

Even the examiners, who had been running the same test for nearly ten years, could not make sense of him. But the exam continued.

"Already? There's still about ten seconds left. Let's at least wait that long."

Some of them, because the rules said so.

"Agreed. That one poured out as much aura as Rania, didn't he?"

Some of them, because of a stubborn little spark of expectation.

"Why in the world did the Headmaster let a lunatic like that..."

And some of them, because of a misunderstanding.

While they waited for the result, each for their own reasons, one examinee rose from her seat.

"Lady Rania?"

Someone called her name. She paid it no mind, and walked to the railing.

"Eugene..."

He really was a strange person. He didn't care about anyone's eyes on him. He had seen through her intentions and shouted out the contents of the exam. And through every single moment of it, he had kept a smile on his face.

And that wasn't all. At their first meeting he had called her by name alone, the way a lover would. Out of nowhere, he had asked to ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠be friends. And every time he looked at her, it was with such gentle eyes.

Perhaps that was why. The Empress of No Emotion, Rania Vulcanus, understood.

This feeling she held toward Eugene was, without a doubt...

A profound friendship.

And a blazing one, hot as fire!

For the first time in her life, Rania felt that she had found a true friend.

"So, Eugene."

Her hands tightened on the railing.

"...Please."

She looked at Eugene, still holding the scarecrow, and a faint smile touched her lips.

And the next instant—

Tick.

The indestructible scarecrow exploded.

The scarecrow's destruction condition. For some reason, it was emblazoned in clumsy, almost sloppy lettering, plain as day. And it was this:

The problem was that Vivian was the strongest being in the world. A few hours ago I had possessed an F-rank extra. There was no way I had anything that surpassed her.

Except for two things.

The first was the rank of my Unique Trait. According to the lore bible, Vivian's rank was SSS. Meaning every Unique Trait and skill she possessed was SSS-rank or lower.

Admiration, on the other hand, was EX-rank. On Unique Trait rank alone, even the current Eugene had already surpassed Vivian.

Of course, that was as far as it went.

A high Unique Trait rank didn't change the fact that every skill I borrowed came in at SSS or below. Activating them would only draw suspicion from everyone watching, and the odds of actually destroying the scarecrow were still terrible.

Which was why I had gone with the second option.

"Dad. It's me. I'm Scarecrow."

The Vicious Onion Strategy.

Vivian had become the strongest being in the world by passing through countless battlefields. I, too, had climbed to the ranks of the strongest — after passing through countless battlefields of the Korean internet.

Trash talk.

That was the something with which the current me could surpass Vivian.

Vivian never even argued, after all.

"Keh keh keh, still so full of contradictions, Vivian!! Look at yourself! Drenched in blood! So think! Is the justice you cling to truly ri—"

WHAM!

"Ri... righ—"

"Tch. This bastard. Talks way too damn much."

She could just kill them, so why bother?

Which means this will definitely work.

No. It had to work.

"Dad I'm telling you I'm a scarecrow because you abandoned all of us our whole family got ripped out of the ground in the most wretched way bodies carved up by saws torn apart by sick—"

If I could enroll in Zion in one piece. If I could save the people who were supposed to fade away so pointlessly, and reach a happy ending—

"Yeah that's right and while our bodies were being torn apart by sickles I screamed your name thirty-four, thirty-five times sobbing and you didn't answer even on—"

And if, in the end, I could save the world itself—

"How could you do that to us our whole family waited and waited for you to come back we waited and waited and you never sh—"

Then maybe I could be happy too.

I put on a smile loaded with that hope, and asked the scarecrow, all gentle warmth.

And the next instant—

The indestructible scarecrow exploded.

"Ack— aack— debris— aack."

I fended off the flying wreckage and quietly prayed, deep in my heart.

Take the bait, Vivian.

Because only then, the moment the entrance exam was over, would I be able to save the villainess.

The Dwarf Volcano Core, where the dwarves made their home.

"?"

A woman with light-purple hair turned her head toward the Marcia Empire.

"...It broke."

And the next instant, the woman vanished.