The Golem's Secret
Heaven's Cat was an idiot. There had always been a way to bring corpses onto the battlefield without granting Baengnae the [Surplus Camouflage]. No—correction. I was the idiot. The moment I tried to rely on Heaven's Cat, I should have predicted I would become an idiot too.
Do you remember how we could bring city items onto the battlefield? That's right. When you die, you become a corpse, and a corpse is an item. My shallow preconceptions had collided with Heaven's Cat's idiocy and forced me to purchase [Surplus Camouflage]. In the end, only Baengnae benefited.
Of course, there was a limit. According to the rules, each summon could only carry a set mass. That amount was roughly three dwarf corpses. So Boots and Shinnip had carried sacks containing three corpses each into the waiting room, plus three more inside Baengnae's stomach. Since Baengnae's "inventory" was already stuffed with signposts, she couldn't carry any additional corpses.
Thus, nine dwarf zombies were created. Summoned in the same manner as the previous match, they now sat along the mountain path sharpening stones.
The chat room fell momentarily silent. Nearly three thousand viewers were watching, yet none of them apparently owned a necromancer. This was perfect for me, since I planned to exploit information gaps from now on.
Generally, defense held the advantage over offense. Especially on a steep, wide battlefield, the side forced to move first was always at a disadvantage. But because Baengnae was a necromancer, we didn't need to move first. The enemy, seeing the growing number of zombies, would assume that giving us time would only increase our forces.
So while the golems frantically charged up the mountain path, the zombies sat comfortably sharpening stones. Weapons weren't the only advantage. This was mountainous terrain, so elevation differences were inevitable. And the side that seized the high ground first held an overwhelming advantage.
Baengnae watched the golems climbing from below, chewing on jerky she had hidden in her pocket. The moment they reached optimal range, she intended to strike. Soon enough, a golem drew close and swung its arm, hurling its hammer at her.
BOOM—
The hammer missed, landing far off due to distance and height. Baengnae had been sprinkling stone dust into the air while chewing jerky, so the golem must have mistaken it for another summoning. Seeing its weapon gone, Baengnae drew her sword and shouted.
"Let's go!"
The zombies each grabbed a sharpened stone and charged down the slope. Shinnip followed right behind them.
THUD! THUD! THUD!
Using the high ground, the dwarf zombies hurled themselves at the golems, smashing stones into their bodies. They flew at the enemies as if self-destructing. The impact began peeling away the armor of the defending golems bit by bit.
CRACK— CRACK—
But no matter the terrain or numerical advantage, fighting stone golems with zombies alone was difficult. Soon the largest golem forged a new hammer and began smashing the zombies aside.
WHAM—
One hit, one zombie. The powerful mass sent the struck zombies flying through the air, bodies crumpled. But the golems weren't the only ones with heavy attacks. A six-armed giant charged through the zombies and drove a signpost into a golem's head.
CRACK—
Meanwhile, Zombie Dog tackled another golem, and the two of them tumbled down the mountain together. Two golems had temporarily left the battlefield.
Baengnae ordered Shinnip to handle the leader, then climbed onto a golem whose head had been destroyed. Inside the shattered skull was a thin membrane protecting the core, surrounded by rocks being pulled in for repairs. Baengnae suddenly sniffed the air and lifted her head.
"Huh… smells weird?"
She thrust her needle-sword vertically into the protective membrane. The membrane tore bit by bit. Staring inside, Baengnae shoved both hands in and ripped the membrane apart.
RIP— RIP—
Then she grabbed the core that had been controlling the rocks and yanked it out. Looking at the core, she smiled.
"Heehee. Snack! Snack!"
What was inside the core? Kim Pokhaeng's claim that he had "beaten up a golem" had spread through the community on his own words. But it was strange. How exactly did one beat up a golem? Logically speaking, we never said we "beat up" a wall. We said we "hit" it. So community users assumed Kim Pokhaeng was simply stupid enough to try punching golems barehanded.
But golem summoners had a secret.
Baengnae smashed the core's shell and shattered the glass tube inside. Finally, she pulled out the brain at the core's center. The connected wires snapped as the soft organ was extracted.
The golem's core had actually been a brain in a jar.
Baengnae raised the pink brain triumphantly toward the sky, wearing a blissful smile. She had discovered a goldmine. Golems were edible enemies.
"Waaah!"
CHOMP.
The quivering brain in Baengnae's hand vanished, exactly the size of her mouth.
CHOMP CHOMP CHOMP— NOM NOM.
"Delicious! Delicious!"
The dwarf zombies watching drooled at the sight. They wanted to eat the brain of a higher being. But Baengnae didn't even glance their way and finished it all.
"Nom nom."
There was no need to worry, though. Baengnae raised a finger and pointed at the golem fighting Shinnip.
"There! There's more snacks over there!"
Baengnae threw her sword aside and lifted the armor of the golem she had just eaten. She had realized that to reach the contents inside, she needed to break the hard outer shell with something. Seeing this, the zombies rushed over and grabbed pieces of golem armor as well. Eyes wild, they charged toward the golem Shinnip was fighting.
Losing limbs was no problem. To taste even a drop of brain broth, they threw their entire bodies against the shell, pounding it relentlessly.
CRACK! WHAM! CRASH— WHAM! WHAM—
The leader golem held out for a while. But the zombies' determination was greater. Dozens, hundreds of strikes. Cracks finally began spreading across the golem's exterior, and a signpost flew toward the damaged armor.
BOOM—
"Ehehehe!"
The fallen leader golem sent out an emergency signal. In response, the golem that had been facing Zombie Dog below turned and began climbing the hill. When it reached the top, there was no battlefield left to see—only a swarm of creatures pounding stones into the leader's exposed insides, desperate to taste its flesh.
The fight had ended long ago.
"Waaah!"
Baengnae pulled out the leader golem's core. When Shinnip reached out, Baengnae smacked his hand away with a shriek. Shinnip looked wronged. He had done all the hard work, yet he wasn't even allowed to touch the reward.
Baengnae peeled away the inner membrane around the core like removing the skin of a delicious fruit. When only the glass tube remained, she opened the lid without breaking the glass this time. The brain was hers alone, but she was willing to share the broth with Shinnip.
What a kind and generous little zombie.
SLURP SLURP. CRUNCH. CRUNCH.
"Delicious!"
Soon Shinnip received the container of broth and gulped it down like life-giving water. Noticing the dwarf zombies staring, he left a little and shared it with them. It was a heartwarming scene of camaraderie. The zombies who received the container licked it clean to the bottom.
Just then, Baengnae shouted loudly.
"Huh? Huh? More snacks!"
At her words, the remaining golem seemed to sense something wrong and took a step back. But Zombie Dog charged from behind and knocked it forward onto its face. Its head touched the ground. The zombies, eager to taste happiness, grabbed stones and charged all at once.
Kim Pokhaeng screamed in rage. He couldn't comprehend what was happening before his eyes. He howled that this match had to be declared invalid.
"Hey, you bastards! What the hell is that?! This is bullshit! What is that?! What kind of ridiculous— Aaaaargh!"
[Match Over]
"It's over."
Heaven's Stone Guardian looked down at the screen with cold eyes. He had been Kim Pokhaeng's patron. He had also disliked the man intensely.
There had been no great meaning in the Stone Guardian choosing to sponsor this foolish human. Headquarters had ordered him to find a specific summoner, and he had descended to the lower floors on an expedition. He had simply happened to find someone whose attributes roughly matched and sponsored him. He needed to write a report for headquarters, after all.
"Trash got caught in the net. Good riddance."
What was the role of a patron? Sponsorship itself was something anyone with the ability to form a contract with the System could do. Ultimately, a "good patron" was someone who could provide more advice to their target. Direct rewards carried penalties too severe for an individual to bear.
That was why patrons sought out compatible sponsorship targets. Intangible information could be provided endlessly. Similar types of summoners could receive more diverse and higher-quality advice.
But Kim Pokhaeng was complete trash. He couldn't even properly utilize a tenth of the precious information given to him. Keeping him around would only damage the patron's reputation.
So the Stone Guardian had given up. At some point, he had simply left Kim Pokhaeng to his own devices and wasted time meeting other patrons instead. Once the tournament ended, his business trip would be over.
Then he heard an interesting story. Heaven's Snake from the neighboring department had been disciplined after getting worked up over a Stage 3 summoner. A patron defeated by their own summoner? Since that summoner had been designated as Kim Pokhaeng's next opponent, the Stone Guardian had come to check on the sponsorship target he had been neglecting.
What he saw was very intriguing. The other summons were nothing special, barely above average for Stage 3. But that small female-type entity was different. He would need to access information to know exactly what, but was it worth the effort? He was mildly curious, but she was still only Stage 3. If she was truly exceptional, he would meet her on the upper floors.
The Stone Guardian summarized the situation simply.
"I see. This batch is a bumper crop."
He smiled with amusement. As a result, a magnitude 7 earthquake struck Kim Pokhaeng's city. The entire city shook violently.
RUMBLE— RUMBLE—
"Aaaagh! Damn it, what now?!"
Objects toppled and buried Kim Pokhaeng. But the Stone Guardian had no interest in whether a single insect lived or died.
Kim Pokhaeng's grand dream ended there.