Emergency from Day One
It's an emergency from day one. This is a truly unexpected emergency. I definitely came to this world to film a sweet rom-com in the A Yankee Kind to Otakus genre, not some terminal-illness youth drama like I Want to Eat Your Pancreas!
"Hey! Im Daseul! Snap out of it! You can't die! Don't get blood all over my genre!"
My shout rang through the hallway, but Daseul, leaning against my shoulder, only let out a delirious little laugh. "Hehe... Siwoo..."
The handkerchief I was holding under her nose was already soaked bright red. Just how hard was she bleeding? Was this some kind of incurable disease? Or was there a setting in this gender-reversed world where girls spurt nosebleeds when they get too excited? I didn't remember anything like that.
There wasn't time to think. I draped Daseul's arm over my shoulder and broke into a full sprint toward the infirmary. Luckily, as a yankee who only ditched class every once in a while—very occasionally—I could find the place on pure instinct. Call it a homing instinct.
That said, even though women were supposed to be stronger in this world, her body wasn't unusually solid or heavier than it looked. Must have been bone density or something. Still, since I was taller, I basically carried her the whole way and kicked the infirmary door open.
Bang!
"Teacher! We've got a patient! Massive bleeding—huh?"
The infirmary was silent. White curtains swayed gently in the breeze, and the only thing in the air was the faint scent of disinfectant. A lone sign sat on the desk: Out for a Moment.
"Ah, shit... Of all the times."
I laid Daseul on the nearest bed. The second she touched it she started muttering nonsense. "Uhehe... Siwoo's bed..."
This girl was clearly suffering from oxygen deprivation to the brain due to blood loss.
"Hey, stop talking nonsense and sit up straight. Head down!"
I recalled the first-aid training the military had beaten into me. Everyone says to tilt your head back for a nosebleed, but that's actually dangerous—the blood can run down your throat and block your airway.
"Head forward. Good. I'll press here, so breathe through your mouth."
I squeezed firmly between the bridge and wings of her nose. Her body heat seeped into my fingertips. Daseul flinched at the contact, then obediently lowered her head.
"...Siwoo."
"Don't talk. Stay focused until the bleeding stops. You feel where I'm pressing? Keep that spot pinched. I'll grab an ice pack."
I pulled an ice pack from the infirmary fridge, wrapped it in a towel, and alternated pressing it against the bridge of her nose. Leaving it on too long would make it too cold even through the cloth.
Who knew all that administrative-soldier know-how from my past life—running errands for the officers—would actually come in handy here.
Roughly ten minutes later the blood dripping from the tip of Daseul's nose finally began to slow. I let out a long breath and studied her face.
"Phew... How do you feel? Think you'll live?"
Daseul looked up at me with hazy eyes. Her long bangs, usually hiding her face like a curtain, had fallen aside in the chaos. Even with blood smeared across it, her revealed features carried a strangely seductive air. Or maybe not seductive... more like she was thoroughly steeped in something.
"...Yeah. I'm okay."
"Don't scare me like that. Are you actually sick somewhere? Some chronic condition?"
I asked seriously. If this really was a terminal-illness trope, I'd have to file a genre-change request immediately.
Daseul hesitated, then answered in a voice that seemed to crawl into the floor.
"No... It's not that."
"Then why the fountain show? It looked like a geyser earlier."
"F-fountain show..."
Her voice shrank with embarrassment. Even now, that was the word that stuck with her.
Daseul avoided my eyes and fidgeted with her fingers. Then her face flushed crimson and she dropped the bomb.
"It's just... I've never... talked this close to a guy before..."
"...Huh?"
"You were... too close, Siwoo... and you smelled nice... so my body just... reacted on its own."
I stared at her blankly. What was she even saying? A nosebleed because it was her first time talking to a guy?
"Puhahahahahat!"
I couldn't hold it back. Laughter exploded out of me.
"No way, I've seen this exact scene in manga before. Hey, Im Daseul! You're seriously hilarious."
"D-don't laugh! I'm being serious..."
Embarrassed, Daseul yanked the blanket over her head. I still couldn't stop laughing.
I knew common sense was flipped in this world, but I hadn't expected her to be this innocent. Even by my previous life's standards as a hardcore otaku, this level of pure-hearted gloomy-girl trait was ridiculously rare.
"All right, fine! Guess that makes it partly my responsibility too."
I gently pulled the blanket back down and looked straight into her eyes. Before I knew it, the kind of smile this body must have worn dozens of times a day had crept onto my lips.
A predator's smile.
Just smiling felt good. No wonder the yankee in my memories had gone around laughing so cheerfully all the time. If smiling made everyone in the world feel this good, the whole "laughing bell" thing wouldn't have sounded so absurd.
My tension had risen a notch. So... half of this was a joke. The other half was pure selfishness—I wanted to see more of that delightful reaction.
"Daseul. Want me to help you out?"
I made an offer I never would have in my old life.
"...H-help with wh-wh-what?"
Daseul's trembling voice came from under the blanket, only her eyes visible.
I put on my slyest smile and continued in the most kind yankee tone I could manage.
"You said you have zero immunity to guys, right? Then all you need is practice. With me."
"P-practice...?"
"Yeah. Talk to me every day, eat together, sometimes get this close and look at each other. Wouldn't that build up your guy immunity pretty fast? I heard allergies actually develop easier if you're a picky eater as a kid. So the opposite should work too, right? Exposure therapy."
Like I'd said earlier, school wasn't just for studying. Learning interpersonal skills was basic common sense.
The moment I finished, Daseul's pupils started shaking violently. Her breathing turned ragged. The fingers gripping the blanket went white at the knuckles.
"Th-that... so... what you're saying, Siwoo, is..."
Daseul swallowed hard. Her gaze traced my lips, then the collarbone visible between the open buttons of my shirt, then the silver piercing in my ear. The version of me reflected in her eyes looked strangely captivating—like a predator deciding how to dismantle its prey, or a child staring at a long-dreamed-of treasure.
Seeing that look aimed at me carried a surprising amount of pressure. Her whole body trembled so hard that the messy clump of hair sticking up from her poorly styled bangs shook like a real-life ahoge.
Finding her reaction endlessly entertaining, I decided to pour a little more fuel on the fire. I leaned in closer, bringing my face right beside her ear so she could get a better whiff of that "scent" I'd supposedly given off.
"Why? Don't like the idea of practicing alone with me?"
"N-no! It's not that I don't like it... I don't dislike it!"
"...Day 1?!"
Daseul practically shrieked the words back at me. Of course I only meant "first day of training," but there was no way I didn't know how that phrase would sound in this situation.
"Wh-wh-what?! What do you mean Day 1? Is it the Day 1 I'm thinking of? What are you even thinking?! Suddenly saying today is day one? No, that's not—it's not that I won't accept or anything! It's even less that I don't deserve to accept it! B-but still, shouldn't we get to know each other more first? You might not get it, but this is my first time, so I'd like it to be a little more romantic... Ah, but again, it's not that I hate the idea... Yeah..."
Unable to endure any longer, Daseul kicked the blanket off and sat bolt upright. The nosebleed had stopped, but now her entire face burned like a tomato about to burst. She waved her hands in panic, completely flustered, yet her eyes never left me for a second.
Watching her, I cheered inwardly. I also reflected on my actions, and apologized in advance.
I reflected on having reduced her to nothing but an amusing gloomy girl I wanted to toy with. And... I apologized in advance for the fact that I was about to spend the rest of our school days mercilessly teasing my desk mate who was, after all, just a classmate.
"What are you talking about? I just meant it's day one of the training. You... misunderstood, didn't you?"
"U-uuugh...! Y-you're just teasing me! You arrogant yankee...!"
Her reaction was too delicious. Just looking at her made every pleasure-related hormone in my brain feel like it was pouring out in a waterfall. I was already excited to see how fun school life—and this "practice"—was going to be.
Feeling like I'd acquired the most interesting new toy, I watched the stuttering, panicking Daseul and gave her the most harmless yet dangerous smile in the world.
"Hehet?"