Modern Goods Are Gods!
Modern goods were like gods. The warehouse floor was littered with stuff scattered everywhere. Staring at it, I shouted,
"Now food shortages are a thing of the past!!"
The floor was rolling with all sorts of canned goods, cup ramen, canned cola, and more. And that wasn't all. Jumbo bags of foreign potato chips with zero nitrogen. A tablet loaded with videos to survive this boring, WiFi-less hellhole. Solid fuel for boiling water, a simple survival kit. The pricey booze I'd stashed in my old one-room apartment. Even comfy clothes for moving around.
Now I was rich!! This was Inventory! This was an SSR-grade trait!!!
"What... is all this?"
Aris murmured, looking pretty shocked.
Hmm, yeah, I get it. Luxurious preserved foods like mine would do that. Canned tuna, cup ramen, cola. Perfect nutritional balance with carbs, protein, and fats—not even the fancy A-rank cafeteria meals could compete!
"What else? My food stockpile."
"No, that's not... Yumia, you're a unique magic user?!"
"...Huh?"
"That was definitely magic! And no mana flow at all!"
"That's a bit different..."
"And these mysterious items! You must've summoned special stuff from another world...!"
She was jumping to some weird conclusions. And that misunderstanding hit my reverse scale!
"...What did you say?"
"Eh?"
...Special items? Unforgivable. Insulting my cola and ramen?
"Special items!?"
"E-eh? Did I say something wrong!?"
I pulled out a canned cola. Cracked it open. Pssht—steam hissed out. Still ice-cold from the fridge function. Perfect. I tore open a bag of chips and handed it to Aris, like a devil tempting a soul.
"Try one."
"This... isn't dangerous, is it?"
"It's fine."
"Hmm..."
Aris skeptically picked up one chip and popped it in her mouth. Her eyes went wide instantly.
"Salty and crunchy... the flavor explodes with a crisp, it's so good! This taste... potatoes!?"
Aris shoved another chip in right away. Huh, so this world has potatoes too? News to me.
"You can cook potatoes like this? The chef who made these is a genius, no doubt!"
Aris's eyes sparkled as she said it. These were cheap no-name chips, though. A noble lady corrupted by junk food. Heh heh heh. Potatoes bow to no nobility.
But we weren't done yet.
"Still... my throat's a little dry."
"Here."
I handed her the cola. Having tasted the chips' glory, Aris took a sip. Her face scrunched up cutely, her wavy golden hair trembling with it.
"Ugh... huh?"
"Good, right?"
"What... is this?"
"Ah, this is called cola. A drink from my hometown."
I said it like I'd invented it myself. Of course, I was just riding the coattails of some great megacorp. But no IP laws here—no big corps to sue. So it was mine now, right?
"Ugh... this is amazing... I could get addicted."
First taste of carbonation's fizz had Aris hooked. Chips and soda? No resistance possible. She was trapped in the chip-cola happiness spiral. She drained the can in no time.
"So, what makes 'em special items?"
"W-well..."
Aris's cheeks flushed a bit. Watching her eat made me hungry too, so I cracked open a cola.
"Anyway, homework can wait. It's the weekend, right?"
I casually shoved Karnaroff's book aside.
"Sh-should we!?"
Food secured, no rush anymore. I spread snacks across the living room table.
The chat stretched late into the night. We had to hush up whenever the dorm supervisor passed, but otherwise, no interruptions. I learned a ton. Aris's background, how vast the Empire was, how famous Reinhardt's faculty were across it.
At this point, I was convinced. This wasn't some gate. Too detailed for a themed dungeon. This was a whole other world.
But who cared?
"Ahhh... so happy..."
In the process, we demolished chips, cola, and other snacks. Couldn't break out the booze with Aris around, but it was enough. Felt like a school trip.
I was nestled in Aris's arms, getting petted. Not what I'd planned—midway, she'd asked, "Can I pet you just once...?" and I'd said sure, and here we were.
"Yaaawn. This is nice."
Sera's chest got in the way a bit, but Aris was flat enough that it worked. Sure, Aris was smaller overall—trade-offs—but I was tiniest, so no issue.
From that position, I asked what I'd been wondering.
"Why do you take such good care of me?"
Aris said she had lots of siblings, so she was used to looking after kids. Seeing me live so carelessly made her want to help.
'Just a spoiled husband generator, huh?' I thought, deep in my own spoiling. But since getting spoiled felt good, I stayed put. Sera would've nagged right here. Though booze would loosen her up into babying me anyway.
"So, how do you use that thing?"
Aris leaned in toward me.
"This?"
I snapped my fingers. A staff appeared right on them.
"You can use it like that too? Jealous. Unique magic like yours."
"Not unique magic."
"If not unique magic, then what...?"
Too long to explain.
"Just my constitution."
"F... I wasn't expecting a real explanation anyway... But if it's that fast... shields and stuff too...?"
Sniff. Sniff. Breathing sounds.
Wait. Shields? Come to think of it, this thing could fit a pretty big shield, right? I recalled that annoying shield the skeleton skull in the 1st-floor boss room had. That'd fit... and if I crouched, I could hide completely? Hauling that around...
A hint for clearing the 2nd floor glimmered.
The next day, I admitted it. Living here wasn't half bad. Cute healer girl Aris around, food pricey but manageable with supplies. (Snacks all gone, though—we ate 'em yesterday.)
Took it easy touring the school. Sold Aris some cola. Felt guilty just giving it away, but selling? Fair game.
"One silver per can isn't highway robbery?"
Magic words to shut that down: distribution margin. Markups are fattest there. Her allowance was 15 silvers anyway—fine. Honestly, getting caught meant bathroom duty, which I did this morning too. Tolerable minus the lingering toilet stink on my hands. Annoying, though.
With my 3 silvers, we hit the A-rank cafeteria. Pay 3 silvers, eat-all-you-can buffet. I loaded up on meat. Gotta get my money's worth. My plate was a mountain.
"...You always eat like that?"
"Yup."
"...You don't gain weight..."
Aris gave me that complicated look. Same one Sera got every time.
How do you slam meat and booze and keep that figure? she'd gripe.
Heading out after, the sun was overhead. Destination: library. Massive, 1st to 8th floor. First-years limited to 3rd. 1st and 2nd for study space, 3rd up for magic tomes.
"So I can learn other attack spells?"
Grabbed a book full of hope, but inside:
History of Magic
192 Ways to Make Flowers Bloom Faster
Introduction to Magic Circles
Magic Repair
Basic Auxiliary Magic Even a Troll Can Understand
"All non-lethal spells..."
"Haha... First-years can't learn elemental magic till they master basic attack spells."
"Yeah, you said it's by law. Can't learn 'em."
"Yep. Imagine first-years blasting advanced general attack magic... horrifying."
"But why 192 flower-bloom spells...?"
"Well... the world of magic is endless?"
Magic even a troll can understand? [Magic to Not Drop Your Sword][Magic to Speed Up Hand Movements][Magic to Soothe Heartburn] ...Huh. More useful than I thought? Especially the third. Perfect for hangover mornings after boozing. Intro claimed even orcs could get it—super friendly illustrations and explanations.
"Gotta borrow this."
"Can't borrow those."
"...Why the hell not...!"
"Red labels mean no checkout. Super popular, though."
Makes sense. Magic circles so simple, cast right away. No need to grok mana input formulas.
...Learn it now?
Figured out [Magic Circle Mathematician]. Smooths converting equations to circles and back—like extra brain lube. Felt like an extra calculator in my head? But these were oversimplified, making conversion trickier. Take time.
Oh right, phone's charged. Snapped pics of the good ones. Study later.
"...What's that?"
"Soul collector."
"Eek!"
Aris freaked, snatched my phone, nearly smashed it on the floor—
"No! It's not! Just a magic tool! My bad!"
"Oh, not? Thought you'd picked up devil worshipper junk..."
Devil worshippers. Vaguely heard yesterday—real evil bastards. No wonder Aris flipped.
'Hope I never meet 'em...'
We left the cafeteria, passed East Forest entrance. Birds like sparrows landed on my shoulders naturally. Red, green, blue. Traffic light colors, coincidentally.
"Wah! Yumia! On Yumia's shoulders!"
Aris squealed excitedly. Funny—she'd hushed her breath so they'd not fly off.
I was chill. Just praying no shoulder shits.
"Can I touch too!?"
"Why not?"
Permission granted, Aris reached out—but they flew off. She pouted.
"Birds don't like me, huh."
Explain [Natural Affinity]? Nah—someone beat me to it. Soft, feminine voice tickled my ear.
"It's not that they dislike you, dear. That child is the special one."
Turned around. Flowing green-and-white robes—like fairy wings or traveler's cloak, opposite school uniforms. Kind smiling face. Flowing black hair framing deer-like horns.
"Beloved by nature, aren't you? Student."