Melancholy
"I just can't believe you with words alone. Come on, promise for real this time." Lee Soo-min crooned, sticking out her pinky finger. Seeing her do something straight out of kindergarten made childhood innocence feel like it might come rushing back.
...Though her current look had zero innocence to it.
The alley was narrow enough as it was, and with her pressing in like this, we were close enough that a single fist might barely fit between us. Close enough to feel her breath.
"More than that..."
"What!"
"You're way too close right now. Wanna step out and talk?"
"No... that's..."
She seemed to hesitate for a second, then glanced down, avoiding my eyes. I didn't have a perk to read other people's thoughts, but even without it, I could guess what was on her mind right now. Embarrassment. Worry. Anxiety. The kind of emotions you'd feel in a situation where you were doing something sneaky around your crush.
Those feelings were plain as day on her face. She was probably fretting that Kang Min-jun might overhear our conversation. If she was that worried, she should've just suggested talking farther away...
Maybe the alcohol was messing with her judgment.
"Anyway, hurry up. Do the right thing while I'm asking nicely?"
"No, it's not like doing this..."
She glared sharply and thrust her pinky out again. I should've been suspicious when she, who usually tried to go out with Kang Min-jun every day, suddenly suggested we go buy hangover remedies together...
The reason she was cornering me like this? It all stemmed from a promise I'd made last time.
After singing that one song for Choi Da-eun and her seeming pretty satisfied, she'd asked for just one more. Without hesitation, I'd roped in Lee Soo-min for help. And the bargaining chip from that was my agreement to help her once, whenever she wanted.
She was cashing in on it now. The pinky promise was probably just to reconfirm.
"You clearly said you'd do it if it wasn't a hassle. Picking out a birthday present for Min-jun together doesn't seem like that big a deal."
Kang Min-jun's birthday was coming up soon. She'd requested we go shopping together to pick something he'd like. In response, I'd tossed out a few gift ideas he might enjoy and told her to just buy one of those.
"How do I know you didn't just throw out random stuff because you were too lazy? You have to buy a present anyway, so let's go together."
That was her logic as she pushed relentlessly for the shopping trip. Objectively speaking, I was the one in the wrong here. I'd promised to help with reasonable requests, and shopping together wasn't exactly a tall order.
But my head was already a mess with my lifespan and Kim Seo-yeon. I didn't want to tire myself out shopping with Lee Soo-min on top of that.
"Hurry up. Promise."
But dodging here wouldn't change anything. It'd just dig me in deeper. With no choice, I hooked my pinky around hers and promised.
The soft wrap of her finger. And because she played guitar, I could feel the slightly rough spots on it.
"Good. We're going together this Sunday."
She beamed like she hadn't just been mad a second ago. Her face radiated happiness. Such dynamic emotions. No doubt plenty of readers loved this side of her.
I thought of my ex, whose mood swings were extreme, and it soured me on it.
"You're back? Took a while."
"Ugh, no stock nearby. Had to hunt around."
Truth was, there was plenty of stock. The convenience store was packed. I'd worried from afar, but thankfully, they were overflowing. They'd probably stocked up anticipating today.
Made sense—running a shop in a bar alley like this, they'd have to expect big days like today.
"Yeah? Good work."
Kang Min-jun took the hangover remedy I handed him and downed it in one go. Even drunk, the bitterness hit him hard, scrunching his face.
Before buying it, I'd remembered Lee Soo-min's ordeal and picked the bitter one to mess with him a bit.
"...Still handsome even like that."
"Huh? What'd you say?"
"Nothing."
His handsome face stayed intact even scrunched up. If anything, it just annoyed me more. Maybe it was the booze, but mentally aged as I was, seeing him act so childish stirred a twinge of self-loathing.
...Time to head home.
"I'm heading out."
"Eh? Already?"
"Not feeling great right now. Better not drink more."
"Tch... Yeah, can't be helped. Get home safe."
He waved weakly, looking disappointed.
"Bye."
"......"
"See you next time."
In order: Lee Soo-min, Kim Seo-yeon, Han Ji-soo. Unlike Min-jun, none showed any regret. Kim Seo-yeon didn't even glance my way—her eyes fixed on Kang Min-jun.
Sticking around would just breed weird feelings, so I quickened my pace.
I never thought much of it before, but with all the recent stuff making me hyper-aware, my mind felt needlessly tangled.
"Hoo..."
On the way back to my dorm, with my heavy steps from the jumbled thoughts, I plopped down on a nearby bench for a break.
Remaining Life: 72 days
A translucent blue window floated before my eyes. The fruits of my recent date with Kim Seo-yeon, amid the whirlwind of thoughts and emotions.
"......"
I stared blankly at it, numbly, as a cool breeze tickled my skin, waiting for this damn mood to lift even a little.
The next day, as expected, a skull-splitting hangover hit. The kind where you'd be bedridden for half a day at least.
Still, I dragged myself up.
"Maybe head to the Han River."
I craved an open view. Maybe seeing something expansive would ease this stuffy feeling a bit.
I showered quickly and opened my closet. It used to have just a few outfits, but recent shopping had filled it out nicely.
Today, I wanted to dress up a little, so I picked carefully—
"......"
My hand froze in mid-air while choosing.
A toned-down clean knit and long coat. The ones I'd bought shopping with Kim Seo-yeon. Never actually worn them out yet.
Old me would've grabbed them without hesitation, but...
"...This'll do."
In the end, I went with the set Choi Da-eun had picked last time. It was a repeat, but nothing else in my wardrobe beat it right now.
"Gotta buy more clothes sometime."
Not today, though. I'd already decided on an outing, and shopping wasn't the vibe anyway. Plus, tomorrow's scheduled shopping with Lee Soo-min. Back-to-back shopping trips would've been too much.
Stepping outside, the bright sunlight hit hard. I shaded my eyes for a moment.
"Nice weather, really."
The kind that drew involuntary admiration. Not a cloud in the clear blue sky. That high autumn sky feel.
I hadn't even reached the Han River yet, but my mood was lifting bit by bit.
"Hope it's not too crowded..."
Seoul. Weekend. Perfect weather. All factors aligned today. Odds of an empty Han River? Basically zero.
But the nice weather sparked a greedy hope.
"Oh, seats open."
On the subway to the Han River, more empty seats than expected had hope peeking out. Maybe some god took pity and granted a breather for once.
Slowly, slowly, as I neared the Han River, that anticipation built—
"Ah... screw the gods."
Like a rollercoaster cresting the hill and plummeting. It crashed straight to the bottom. No rebound like a coaster, either.
The crowds felt like a badly chosen amusement park on the wrong day. Forget leisurely river views—I was choking on the throng, about to keel over first.
Tents crammed in the park's central area. Of course today would be market day or whatever event this was.
"Gotta head to the other side."
Surely fewer people there. Thinking that, I changed course.
The path stretched straight ahead. Runners zipped by on the side.
"Huuu... need a break."
Still some crowds visible. But maybe from yesterday's heavy drinking, my body felt leaden. Stamina issues kicked in hard.
I slumped on a nearby bench and tilted my head back to gaze at the sky.
The autumn breeze blew in tandem. It brushed my cheeks—not a bad feeling.
Not bad at all...
A drowsy haze settled in. With weather this good, just staring at the sky felt fine. The crowd was manageable here anyway.
Runners whizzed past, but it was still a decent spot for river views. Maybe skip walking more and just stay put?
As that thought crossed my mind—
Thud—!
Something like a nasty fall echoed. I turned to see someone sprawled on the ground. Didn't look like a simple trip.
"You okay?!"
"Owowow..."
She clutched her ankle with both hands, face twisted in pain. Twisted bad—couldn't even groan properly.
...Hang on, familiar face.
I rummaged through fuzzy memories. Then it hit: a recent encounter with a strong impression.
"Jang Ha-rin, by any chance?"
"Eh? Lee Jun-woo?!"
The fallen one was Jang Ha-rin, Kim Ye-eun's roommate.
She looked shocked too, eyes wide.
"Ow?!"
Pain hit her instantly, scrunching her face again.
"Can you walk?"
"Ow?! N-no... can't..."
Pain shot through as soon as her foot touched ground. No way she could move on her own.
"Here. Runners coming—need to get out of the way. Mind if I touch you?"
"T-touch?!"
She freaked out for a second. Before misunderstandings brewed, I hurried to clarify.
"No, not like that. To move you, I'll have to carry you."
"Ah... oh..."
She hesitated, pondering. Then answered in a crawling voice.
"...Okay."
With her okay, I took a small breath and lifted her. Lighter than expected. Legs shook a bit, but we made it to the bench safely.
I set her down carefully and caught my breath—chin practically heaving.
How'd I get winded from that? Seriously. Seriously. Gotta work out.
"Looks like hospital time... Want me to help you there?"
"...No, that's okay—ow?!"
"...I'll help."
Clearly not okay. A quick search showed a clinic 10 minutes' walk away, but impossible in her state. I pulled up the phone app and called a cab.
"Don't put weight on it by mistake."
"Yeah... Thanks."
She nodded, head bowed low—probably embarrassed.
Supporting her to the main road, the cab was waiting. I got her in and headed to the hospital.
The driver griped about the short fare midway, but I explained and he let it slide.
At the hospital—
"Jang Ha-rin."
"Yes."
"Haa..."
I bowed my head as she was called into the exam room. The outfit I'd dressed up in caught my eye—smeared with blood.
What the hell was this...
I'd come out to clear my head, but it felt more knotted now.
...Just made me gloomier.
Jang Ha-rin flustered by the mention of touching (Image)
