Chapter 39: Chaos in the Red Light District: The Intangibility Incident
Translator: RaidenTL
Chapter 39: Chaos in the Red Light District: The Intangibility Incident
“I’ll try it out first and let you know.”
“Do that. And since the side effects are unknown, I hope you won’t use it in the Labyrinth until you’ve figured out what they are.”
“Of course. I wouldn’t dream of using an unverified item in the Labyrinth.”
I’d heard that the Mouse Transformation Potion had the side effect of changing one’s tastes, but since there was absolutely no information regarding the side effects of this Ring of Intangibility, I decided to test it outside the Labyrinth first.
Where should I try it?
Lafnel had mentioned that the duration of the intangibility depends on the wearer's magical power, so for someone like me, the limit would probably be around one or two minutes.
If the effect wore off while my body was inside a wall or the floor...
I’d die instantly.
Intangibility negates physical attacks and allows one to pass through walls or floors. It’s the ultimate tool for escaping or avoiding traps.
However, unless your body is harder than steel, even the slightest mistake can lead to a fatal injury. Therefore, you must always keep track of when the effect will end. If you miscalculate by even a single second, you’ll get stuck in a wall or the floor and be crushed to death.
Identifying the side effects is important, but using this properly will ultimately require practice.
To use it in actual combat, I needed to get a physical feel for the timing of the effect's expiration. That meant I absolutely had to experiment outside the Labyrinth first.
“Should I try it here?”
I arrived at a suitable vacant lot. It was an open space that the street urchins of the Red Light District used as a playground. It was reasonably spacious and had no structures. It seemed like the most appropriate place to test the ring’s performance.
If I experimented inside a room or a building and ended up pathetically stuck in a wall or some furniture, I’d be dead. A vacant lot or an empty space seemed perfect for testing intangibility.
Fortunately, it was lunchtime, so no one was around. The timing was perfect.
I can’t just sit on a rare artifact like this.
An item like the Ring of Intangibility was a treasure you couldn't find even if you searched for it. Lafnel was truly an odd person for making something so incredible and just tossing it to me to "try out."
“Let’s see. Do I just activate it like this?”
Since she asked me to test it and report the results, I planned to haggle the price down as much as possible if it performed well. That’s how you use a hole-in-the-wall shop. If I paid full price, I’d go bankrupt.
Besides, what’s wrong with fleecing a wealthy, ancient elf a little? She’s lived a long time. No matter how hard I struggle, I won’t even live to be a hundred. I chose to believe that someone who would live for thousands of years wouldn't get angry over a few gold coins.
“Alright, here goes.”
I channeled mana into the ring and activated the intangibility.
In an instant, I felt a sensation as if my body were floating, and then all the clothes I was wearing fell right off.
—Wh-what?!
Don't tell me... as my body became intangible, did my clothes just pass right through me?
Holy shit!
The intangibility only applied to my body. The clothes I was wearing were outside the scope of the effect. Isn't this a side effect in itself? It’s going to be a huge problem if I end up naked every time I use this.
—Ugh. What’s wrong with my voice?
Even my voice had turned strange. it was incredibly thin and had a severe tremor. It felt like I’d inhaled a bunch of helium and was speaking while holding a vibrating massager to my vocal cords. I sounded like an annoying brat.
—Ueegh...
Furthermore, I couldn't touch anything in this state. In exchange for being immune to physical attacks, I couldn't exert any physical influence either. I couldn't put anything into my inventory, and even if I took something out, it was impossible to hold it. I was just floating around, completely naked, unable to do anything but move.
This thing is a heap of defects. No, wait. I can’t pick things up, but I can take them out... Ah!
If I put my hand inside an enemy’s head while intangible and then took an item out...
This is an instant-kill move!
If I thrust my hand into an enemy's head and pulled a dagger out of my inventory... wouldn't their brain turn into mush?
But the drawbacks are too big.
I wasn't completely invisible; I was translucent, so enemies could still perceive me. I also felt strangely slow, making it difficult to approach quickly. Even a light breeze seemed to push my body back easily.
It’s a good thing I tested this in an open lot. Even a strong wind is a weakness. I’m immune to physical attacks, but affected by the wind? Hmm. This part is also a bit problematic.
For now, I’d need to get used to the intangible state to use it properly. Maybe my movement speed would increase once I got the hang of it?
It would be usable if only my clothes didn't fall off.
The fact that I had to wander around in the nude bothered me. It meant showing my naked body to everyone nearby. Plus, having to strip and dress every time I activated the intangibility was a major blow to its convenience.
I could use it as an instant-kill move if I play it right, but I’ll need to compensate for these drawbacks first.
The effect was about to wear off. I needed to quickly grab my clothes, head back to Lafnel’s shop, and tell her it needed more work.
“Huh? What’s that?”
“Whoa! Whoa!! A-A ghost!”
“What! It really is a ghost!”
“Kyaaaaa!”
—Ugh...!!!
Damn it.
The owners of the vacant lot had returned before the ring’s effect ended.
Those damn brats!
The kids started making a fuss, throwing stones at me. I tried to explain that I wasn't a ghost, but no one listened. Or rather, it wasn't that they weren't listening, but that my voice was trembling so violently in my intangible state that they couldn't understand me.
The children were paralyzed with fear. They were in a panic and had no intention of talking to me.
“Go away!”
“Don’t take our playground!”
“Kill it! Kill the ghost!”
“Oppa! I’m scared!”
“Everyone under seven, get back! It’s a monster! A monster crawled out of the Underground Graveyard!”
Ah, so those kids see me as a monster. I suppose it makes sense, given they’re children of the Labyrinth City. It was logical for them to think an evil spirit had escaped from the graveyard.
Right, this wasn't the fear-stricken reaction a modern person would have upon seeing a ghost; it was the dread they felt toward a monster that had crawled out of the Labyrinth. It was a different quality of fear than pure terror. It was an ingrained fear of monsters.
“What’s going on?”
“Huh? That’s...!”
As the street urchins shouted "ghost" and began their "battle" with me, the women of the Red Light District, who usually slept during the day to prepare for the night's work, began to peek into the lot.
“Oh my goodness! A... a well-endowed ghost?!”
“Kyaa...! It’s huge...”
“Hmph. Looks like a bachelor ghost.”
“Ladies, I’ll go call the guards for now.”
The adults pulled the children back and called for the guards. I had to run. But I couldn't.
The intangibility is going to wear off soon.
I was surrounded by the crowd. To escape, I’d have to pass through a wall or a fence. But what if the effect wore off while I was doing that? I’d be stuck in the wall and die instantly.
“What is that?!”
“It really is a ghost!”
Shit. The guards had arrived.
—I’m not a ghost!!! It’s because of the intangibility effect! Gwah!
While I was trying to explain, the effect wore off.
“Wait, it was a person?!”
“Who are you! What were you trying to do in the Red Light District?!”
“It’s not like that! This is a side effect of this accessory! Gwah!”
“Arrest him! Illegal use of abilities and public indecency! And for inciting unrest within the Labyrinth City! Take him away!”
I was apprehended by the guards. In an instant, I was pinned to the ground and handcuffed. I could have resisted if I wanted to, but the moment I fought the guards, it would become a challenge to the Labyrinth City’s public authority.
It would only make the situation worse. A matter that could end with a fine might turn into a prison sentence. Above all, I didn't want to engage in a life-or-death struggle with Gold Badge adventurers, so I decided to go quietly.
Clang!
“Ugh... Dammit.”
I was tossed into a cell. The stone floor was freezing cold.
“W-Wait! I want to call a guarantor!”
“You want a guarantor? You criminal!”
“No, seriously. Look at this!”
When I pulled an item out of my Subspace Pocket to show him, the guard’s eyes widened.
“I am a Subspace Pocket holder. I was at the forefront of the Labyrinth Raid Force after the Cataclysm. You’ve heard the rumors, right?”
“I’ve heard them, but...”
“There’s been a misunderstanding. I wasn't naked in a playground where kids play because I wanted to do something bad. I want to call a guarantor. First, take this.”
I handed two gold coins to the guard. When you’re in an unfair situation, you can’t forget the bribes. This was a medieval Labyrinth City with no laws against improper solicitation. A bribe was the most important element for escaping an unjust situation.
“Hmm. You want to call the Guild Master as your guarantor? A Subspace Pocket holder... and two gold coins. Fine, stay there for now. I’ll pass the word to the Guild.”
“Thank you.”
I could finally breathe a sigh of relief. The Labyrinth City guards were strangely honest in one regard: once they took a bribe, they would provide as much convenience as possible. I’d offered two gold coins; they had to listen.
The stone floor was too cold. I took a spare set of clothes out of my inventory, put them on, and leaned against the wall. To think I’d end up in a cell just for testing an intangibility ring. And the side effects were absolute garbage.
Damn it.
The side effect of the Ring of Intangibility. It was...
—Hey, you can hear us, right?
—Heehee. I think he can see and hear us.
—Hey, brat. Can you see us? You can, can’t you? Right? Can you? Huh?
—Tada~! Look at this. It’s a pussy! Hehehehe!
—Hmph, look at this kid. He’s got quite the poker face.
—The brat is trying so hard to act like he can’t see us.
—How cute. Mr. Shorty from the East. Look at the pussy. Come on. Hurry up.
—For a guy with such a big dick, he’s got a lot of pride, doesn't he?
—Khehehehe. Look at how red his ears are. So cute.
What was with these crazy evil spirits?
As soon as the intangibility wore off, I started seeing these prostitute ghosts. Three evil spirits. One had bandages over her eyes, another had hair long enough to cover her eyes, and the last one had eyes stained pitch black.
I couldn't tell if they were wearing clothes or not. They kept hovering around me, trying to seduce me and talking to me. Was it because I used the intangibility in the Red Light District? It seemed like a bunch of crazy prostitute ghosts had latched onto me.
I must never answer them or let them know I’ve perceived them.
That was Lafnel’s warning. A warning not to give attention to minor spirits. She said things would get annoying if they latched onto you. It was strange enough that things I couldn't see before were suddenly visible. It was likely the result of the ring’s side effect combining with my Spiritual Eye.
But of all things, why did it have to be lustful ghosts? If I made one wrong move, I might get gang-banged by the three of them until my life force was sucked dry.
—Tch. Sister, this kid is no fun. He won’t answer.
—Could it be that someone told him about us?
—Didn't that bitch Lafnel give him a tip? That rotten girl.
What? They know Lafnel?
So they weren't just minor spirits. What the hell are they? I don't know. This is terrifying.
—Hey, brat. If you’re going to ignore us, you’d better keep it up until the end.
—Khehehehe. Our cute little Eastern shorty. He’s totally terrified!
—Hey, just answer me once. Hmm? I’ll show you my pussy. Okay?
—Sister, that won’t work. He’s ignoring us on purpose.
—Khehe. I wonder how long he can keep ignoring us?
—Fine. Keep ignoring us. When we catch you later, we’ll torment you seven times harder.
—Mr. Shorty. Are you looking forward to tonight?
—Khehehehe!!!
Soon, the three evil spirits vanished. Had the side effect worn off?
“Shit... I think I’ve really stepped in it.”
I was uneasy. What would happen if I answered their calls? All three of them were ghosts with large breasts, but I was terrified nonetheless. There were too many hidden elements in this Labyrinth City; one slip-up and I could end up dead.
“Hey, Porter. The Guild Master has arrived personally, just as you asked.”
“Ah...!”
While I was agonizing over the three spirits that had just vanished, the Guild Master herself arrived as my guarantor. The guards were all visibly intimidated. The Adventurer’s Guild in the Labyrinth City was more than just a simple union. In particular, the Guild Master, Moira, was a titan among titans whom even the nobles of the Labyrinth City didn't dare provoke.
“Guild Master...! I-I’m sorry. Because of me...”
“Sigh. Honestly, Sion. What on earth have you been doing? Why were you putting on a nude show in a children’s playground?”
“Well, that’s...”
Yuria was standing behind Moira. She was grinning, looking at me mockingly.
“Get out of the cell first. We’ll talk later.”
Moira probably wouldn't let this slide. She’d likely try to dump some quest on me. That was fine. Everything was fine, but I felt like I was going to die of embarrassment.