Priestess's Theft and Delusion (3)
Priest’s Theft and Delusion (3)
#
On the way to the second dungeon.
Reni wasn't beaming as she had been the previous day. The dissatisfied look had eased after the morning buff, but she still radiated faint discontent.
Seeing the vaguely wistful expression on her face, and the way she occasionally looked at me with eyes that gleamed like a hamster eyeing food right in front of it, I had clearly done something wrong.
But...
This was uncomfortable. If she had a body that lewd and crawled into my arms at night, she should have expected her breasts to get touched at least once. Was that not common sense?
This was all her fault. Honestly, was I even to blame? Was I responsible for things I did in my sleep? No. At a time like this, I needed to say something firm.
"Sorry."
"Huh?"
"I sometimes do strange things in my sleep... If I did anything awful..."
If I scolded her and she stopped crawling into my arms at night, I would be the one losing out. I wasn’t giving in. This was a chillingly rational decision reached through ruthlessly calculating profit and loss with the logic of a refreshingly sociopathic power-fantasy protagonist.
"Th-th-th-that's not it!"
Apparently, I hadn’t actually done anything. Reni’s face had transformed into something resembling a burst tomato the moment I apologized.
"No, no, that's not it... B-besides that, Yoo-jin!!"
"What?"
"D-did you... feel anything strange last night? You didn't, right? Right? Did you?"
"Uh... I don't know.... Not sure... Why? Did something happen?"
"No, no, no! Nothing happened!!!!!"
Hmm... If she denied it that fiercely, I really must not have done anything. Right. Believe in yourself. I believed in the me that Reni believed in.
But that was a separate issue. Why was she screaming about it? Could it be that the one who did something in the night wasn't me, but...
"More importantly, the dungeon! It's the dungeon!!!!!"
Averting her eyes from mine, Reni pointed at the dungeon entrance and made a fuss. Right. The dungeon. Whether luckily or unluckily, it seemed this dungeon didn't have a boss monster either. Because,
[Dungeon #6812]
[Type: Undead / Single]
[Monster Status: ▼]
[Normal: 25]
[Rare: 01]
[Boss: 00]
[Special Notes: None]
...the information popped up like this. That Lich King or whatever didn't seem to be here, and there looked to be one mid-boss-level creature. If that was the case, there was probably a medium magic stone, too.
"Good. This one's going to be different from yesterday. There's a slightly tough one in here. Let's be careful."
"Okay."
# # #
"Anyway, it's fascinating. To think you Awakened can know all of that."
"Hmm..."
"Why do you think the Goddess gave people from another world this kind of ability?"
It wasn't a question laced with a victim mentality or jealousy. It was pure, simple curiosity.
Honestly, I was curious too. Their abilities were so powerful that it felt blatantly convenient. Yet despite possessing such overwhelming powers, the Summoned People did surprisingly little.
I didn't say the heroes who went east were just 'squabbling' with the demonfolk for nothing. They made all sorts of dramatic, solemn gestures, but looking at it objectively, no one ever died, and they didn't even get seriously hurt.
Nor did they inflict decisive damage on the demonfolk. If anything, it felt as though the bastards at the royal castle were restraining them. The Eternal War against the demonfolk sounded momentous, yet almost nothing of consequence actually happened.
Even so, the heroes received endless praise and proverbial head-pats for the most trivial accomplishments.
They call it a great mission or a royal quest to build them up, but if you broke the immersion, it was really no different from someone kissing your ass just for breathing.
For example, it went something like this.
(Recalled from Yoo-jin's distorted memory)
<-- Legend of the Hero of Another World, around chapter 50? -->
「Hey, Earthling, just what is it you're doing?!」
「Ahh, this is called 'drinking water.' By putting water in a cup like this and drinking it, one can ingest 'moisture.'」
「I-Impossible! For us to ingest 'moisture,' we had to look at the sky on rainy days and open our mouths, or run around in the fog! Even the great 9th-Circle Archmage Namarus had to use flying magic to push through the clouds just to ingest 'moisture'!!!」
「Tch, this is why you uncivilized otherworlders. Watch closely. When you down the cup like this, the water enters your mouth, then passes down your esophagus. If you keep doing this,」
「If one keeps doing this?!」
「Don't be alarmed. It aids digestion.」
「IMPOSSIBLE!!!!!!」
「As expected of you, Earthling! Please, take me!!!!」
「Yare yare, this cool-headed protagonist-sama has no need for a heroine, but if you truly insist, I might just display you as a... tro... phy.」
「I want to be one! I want to be Earthling-oniisama's trophy! I want to be displayed in a glass case!!!!!!」
「Tch... shikatanaina... (It cannot be helped...)」
=====================
...How dreadful.
So, in the end, the hero bastards do tasks that are about as difficult as drinking water, receive immense rewards, and either return to their original world or settle down in the other world.
Receiving compensation without any real payment, obtaining what you'd call 'unearned happiness.' That was the content of Part 1, before they crossed over to the western mountain range.
But if so, a question still remained. Why did they get these ridiculous abilities just to do such trifling things?
...After coldly and rationally thinking it through, I was able to arrive at the answer.
'That's because the bastard author couldn't balance his own story. He was an idiot. He didn't have the skill to create narrative tension, so he smothered the protagonist in wish-fulfillment pandering instead. Then again, expecting narrative tension from a moron who couldn't write sex scenes and ran away mid-serialization was the real stupidity...'
"Yoo-jin, did you just hear that? It sounded like thunder outside. If it rains, that'll be a real problem..."
"..."
...I had a feeling that if I didn't fix this habit of reflexively cussing out the author, I was going to end up in serious trouble one day. Whatever she seemed like, she was the goddess who oversaw the world, after all.
Jokes aside, Reni had once said, 'A special ability comes with a fate to match.'
Once Part 1 ended and Part 2 began in the mountain range, the abilities of the Awakened truly became necessary. That was when the story grew serious. Perhaps the Goddess had sent me toward the mountains from the very beginning to stop what was happening there...
"...Yoo-jin."
"...Yeah. I see it."
We smashed through some worthless low-grade skeletons and finally arrived at the dungeon's center.
Sure enough, in the center of the dungeon, there was one guy who was different from the rest.
A hulking skeleton stood before us, carrying a kite shield and wearing sturdy-looking armor. Its displayed stats were lower than mine, but my lack of experience put us on roughly equal footing. In that case...
I signaled to Reni with my eyes.
'You know what to do when I give the signal, right?'
'Yes. I'll get ready.'
#
"Huff... Huff..."
We exchanged several blows, but it remained solid. It didn't attack me aggressively, apparently considering the magic circle behind it more important to defend.
But that was enough.
"Die!"
I thrust my sword at him,
-Clang!
...and he blocked it easily.
"Now!"
-Boom!
Its skull exploded. While I held its attention, Reni had slipped behind it and thrown a Holy Bomb.
-Grrk!
His attention scattered. This was the moment I'd been waiting for!
[Holy Sword 「Esplender」]
[Mode: One-Handed Sword / ▶ Two-Handed Sword]
[Switch modes?]
[▶Yes / No]
The Holy Sword stretched with a series of mechanical clicks, then skewered his body right through.
I cheered in delight!
"TACTICAL!!!!"
-Crunch!
-Boom!
Another Holy Bomb exploded against his torso.
"Keep going!"
-Boom! Boom! Boom!
….
Bone fragments littered the floor. In the end, the guy couldn't withstand the bombs Reni kept throwing and his entire body blew apart.
But....
'Fuck! Semen splattered all over me!'
"Yoo-jin! We did it!"
"...Yeah..."
"I can't believe... I managed to even hunt a monster like that..."
Reni bounced with joy, her face radiant, then ran straight into my arms...
"Wait! Stay back!"
"Huh?!"
Shocked at the rejection, tears instantly welled up in Reni's eyes. No, it wasn't that,
"You can use Purification, right? The one that cleans things up. Right now, please. Hurry..."
"Ah, yes..."
Let’s get this disgusting stuff off first...
# # #
We neutralized the dungeon's magic circle, recovered the medium magic stone, and finally headed back to the inn.
By the time we stepped outside, evening had already come.
The sunset in the mountain range came early.
Scarlet rays of sunlight streamed down through the branches of the autumn-tinted trees. Within the shafts of flowing light, Reni was walking on ahead. Her golden hair sparkled as it swayed between the glow of the dusk and the shadows of the forest.
Perhaps she was happy to have found something she could do, however small. As she walked along the forest path, Reni looked delighted. She was adorable, yet also a little heartbreaking.
But walking so carelessly on a mountain path looked dangerous. Sure enough, Reni soon wobbled and nearly fell backward.
"Hey, you'll get hurt."
"Eep..."
I caught her before she fell, wrapped an arm firmly around her shoulders, and kept walking. Embarrassed by how tightly we were pressed together, Reni lowered her head.
We had already emerged from the mountain and were on flat ground.
Now that we had come out of the mountain, there was no more risk of her falling. But I had no intention of letting her go. In that case....
I slid my hand down to Reni's waist. She seemed startled, but not displeased.
Feeling a playful urge, I gave the soft flesh of Reni's side a little pinch.
"!"
At the unexpected attack, Reni shot me a sharp glare. Then, in a counterattack, she wrapped her arms around my waist. But...
"Grrh...!"
Unlike Reni's soft body, mine was firm and hard to grip. Her hands kept slipping off whenever she tried to pinch my waist. I grinned mischievously and kept kneading the soft flesh of her side.
"Nngh...!"
Finally giving up on pinching my waist, Reni switched her target to the back of my hand. Every time I kneaded her side once, my hand was pinched and clawed at ten times over.
We reached the inn while I played with her waist and she retaliated against the back of my hand.
# # #
"How much do you think a magic stone this size would be worth?"
"I'm not completely sure either... but probably a few dozen silver, wouldn't it?"
After eating and washing, we sat on the bed before the nightly buff, grinning over the day’s spoils. The fist-sized medium magic stone cast an alluring glow across the mattress. Was this really worth so much? Given all the uses described in the novel, it was practically an all-purpose item.
"What do you want to do with this, Reni?"
"What?! Can I really have some too?!"
"I told you from the beginning, didn't I? We split the rewards."
"But still..."
“Things like this are cleanest when divided equally among everyone. Otherwise, resentment quietly builds up inside.”
Money matters were sensitive. Throwing out all talk of contribution or whatever and just keeping things clean-cut from the start like this was for the best.
"Th-then... I don't know what to do with it..."
"Oh, really? Well, just take your time thinking about it. Now, lie down on your stomach."
"What?!"
"I've got to apply the buff. Isn't it about time you knew the drill? While you're getting the buff, just think about how you want to spend your money."
Of course, I had absolutely no intention of giving her the breathing room to think. From here on out, she'd be too busy panting to worry about that.
"Ugh...."
Reni wore a slightly dissatisfied look on her face, but she obediently lay face-down on the bed.
Good. While Reni was lying prone, I'd take the chance to go over the skill I'd be using today.
[Skill: Vibrating Hand]
[Type: Active]
[Effect: The user's hand vibrates. Vibration intensity can be adjusted. Maximum output is proportional to 「Sexual Stamina」.]
I'd created the skill while washing earlier. It was going to be useful in many ways. First, I needed to test it...
-Bzzzt!
My fingertips buzzed. Now I could use them on Reni... Heh heh...
"Yoo-jin? What are you doing?"
"Oh, it's nothing. Stay still."
Reni looked uneasy, but she remained facedown and stared ahead. She had gathered her damp hair and swept it over one shoulder, leaving her slender nape exposed and vulnerable.
And with her robe settled flat over her, the curves of her hips and the silhouette of her long, outstretched legs were plainly revealed. It was a truly magnificent sight, every single time.
Let me see. I’d gotten the buff to C-rank last time, so this time I intended to reach at least B-rank, tormenting her with plenty of skills along the way. Where should I start, and how...?
...Alright.
I lifted up Reni's robe.