Chapter 121
Chapter 121
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 121
Chapter Title: Those Who Have Sinned (4)
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Emma was an apprentice nun of the Radiance Church.
It had been exactly three months since she started working at the cathedral.
Her duties included cleaning and tidying the cathedral, assisting with office work, helping in the kitchen, and supporting charity efforts.
She was thrown into whatever spots needed extra hands at the time, learning the ropes of all sorts of tasks along the way.
That was the nature of being an apprentice nun.
She wasn't a fully ordained cleric yet—just someone taking on part-time work provided by the Church for the benefit of its followers.
It was grunt work, plain and simple, but applicants clamoring for apprentice nun or deacon spots were always overflowing.
The conditions were far better than most corporate jobs.
For comparison, you had to claw through hundreds of competitors just to get hired, then live in constant fear your desk might vanish overnight. Dangerous industrial sites meant grueling shifts where injuries got you nothing but the boot—no compensation, no nothing.
By contrast, the Church's work environment was a model of excellence.
They hired plenty of staff, so the workload stayed light, and you could take vacation whenever you needed it.
Best of all, no pay cuts for low performance.
Sure, it was just apprentice work—could it really match a solid corporate gig in growth potential or long-term stability?
Hardly.
Apprentice nuns and deacons of the Radiance Church who worked diligently without causing trouble were guaranteed ordination. That meant becoming a full-fledged cleric—equivalent to permanent employment at a corporation.
And as long as you didn't violate doctrine and get disciplined, firing was off the table.
The Church's doctrines were remarkably lenient and reasonable, too.
For instance, as long as you maintained the dignity of a cleric, dating and marriage were fair game.
Not to mention the sheer scale of the Radiance Church.
With registered followers in the millions, monthly tithes alone surpassed mid-sized corporate revenues, not counting charity expenditures.
A stable future, manageable work, and respect from the community.
These days, being a Radiance Church cleric was an enviable profession.
Even the modest austerity expected of clerics felt luxurious compared to life outside.
Thanks to that, Emma could end another fulfilling day as an apprentice nun with light steps.
Her quarters were a private room for nuns on the floor above the chapel.
Not huge, but paradise compared to where she'd lived before.
The cramped single-room slum divided by chain-link fences, crammed with dozens like sardines in a can—those memories still gave her chills.
So the clean, cozy interior and plush bed felt almost too spacious, leaving her awkward.
The Church taught that all these blessings were Merciful Radiance's love bestowed upon her.
Thanks to the Saintess's grace.
"......"
Lying on her bed, she naturally recalled the memory that crossed her mind every single day.
It was the day Emma first arrived at this cathedral.
The day she, as an apprentice nun, first met the Saintess.
"Everyone, welcome to the Church family. Let's get along well from now on."
The Saintess Emma saw that day was a figure of such grace and beauty.
That welcoming smile embraced the ragtag group of slum-born apprentice clerics without a hint of distance or disdain.
Her radiant smile left them all dazed for quite a while.
'Wow...'
Of course, Emma was no exception. She'd worn the silliest, starstruck look imaginable.
She'd thought no such beautiful person could exist in the world.
Even tales of her being a daughter sent directly by God felt believable.
So she'd instinctively sensed the Saintess lived in a world utterly apart from hers—no chance of even speaking again.
The head of the Church, like a CEO of a corporation.
Meeting her once was lucky enough...
But Emma's expectations missed the mark entirely.
"Emma, good morning! Glad to see you're settling into cathedral life. No inconveniences?"
"S-Saintess?!"
She didn't live in some swanky penthouse downtown but right here in the cathedral, like everyone else.
When passing in the halls, she'd smile and greet first, remembering every new face's name.
At mealtimes, she ate the same food at the same table in the dining hall, praying alongside them.
"Merciful Radiance, we thank you for this daily bread."
"....."
As time living with the Saintess grew, even underlings like Emma grew accustomed to her presence.
But familiarity didn't breed comfort.
She remained an idol of longing, untouchable.
Emma had figured the Saintess would always be that distant figure to her.
Then an unexpected incident changed everything.
One day, while helping in the kitchen, a whisper called out to her.
"Sister...!"
Emma turned to see an unexpected figure standing there.
"Yes? ...Heavens! Saintess?!"
Flustered, she yanked off her rubber gloves and bowed deeply. The Saintess smiled softly.
"Come on, you don't have to be so formal every time. We're all family in this cathedral."
"Still, how could I..."
Emma hesitantly lifted her head.
"S-so... what brings the Saintess to the kitchen?"
"Hehe, nothing much. I brought a little gift for you, Sister."
In her hand was a small tube of hand cream.
Fragrance-free and edible even if ingested, perfect for kitchen use, she explained.
Emma numbly accepted the skin protectant, then belatedly glanced at her own hands.
Fingers slightly chapped from kitchen work.
That's when the Saintess squeezed some cream and gently applied it.
"I happened to notice your hands passing in the hall earlier. It bothered me. Does it hurt?"
"N-no..."
Just from a passing glimpse in the hall...
'The Saintess herself came all the way here just for me?'
It was hard to believe.
So she stared at the Saintess's retreating back long after the gift was given.
"......"
That evening, after finishing her duties, Emma returned to her room and blankly stared at her hands.
The warmth from that brief touch seemed to linger.
Her heart fluttered so much she barely slept that night.
Even closing her eyes couldn't erase that beautiful smile directed at her.
"......"
It started that day, without a doubt.
Emma could no longer see the Saintess with pure admiration.
Receiving such undeserved kindness should spark gratitude and respect.
But she was... too beautiful. A huge problem, really.
When facing someone attractive, it's human nature to misread a glance as 'Does she like me?' The exceptionally beautiful grow cautious in their demeanor.
A mere eye contact sparks misunderstandings; a small kindness balloons into a burdensome confession. She'd endured such mishaps since childhood, fully aware of her beauty's destructive power.
But the Saintess... was disarmingly unguarded for her perfection. That was the issue.
She acted with oblivious kindness, like someone unaware of her own allure, freely doling out affection that stole hearts—then wore an innocent face knowing nothing of it.
Frankly... blasphemous as it was...
'It's a bit infuriating!'
It felt like she closed distances without reservation solely because they were the same sex.
But this was the 2070s. In Omega Detroit, where diversity peaked and fluid sexualities were normalized, same-sex attraction raised no eyebrows. Reproductive tech for same-sex couples had been around over a decade.
The Saintess wasn't some cryogenically frozen relic from half a century ago. Could she really be that clueless?
'Maybe... she really does see me as special...?'
"...."
Around then, Emma desperately reined in her impious fantasies.
But a racing heart wouldn't calm.
The Saintess was sent by God, to love all equally.
She knew she shouldn't harbor personal desires for such a being... but knowing didn't make her heart obey.
It tormented her. She couldn't endure alone anymore; she needed help.
So Emma resolved to confess her troubles.
Her confidante: Agnes, a senior nun she'd befriended at the cathedral a few months ahead.
Recently ordained, with a calm, trustworthy demeanor—she wouldn't blab this shameful secret.
After hesitating, she finally spoke up.
"Um, Sister Agnes. I have a worry... Could you listen?"
Reading Emma's grave expression, Agnes nodded silently and led her somewhere quiet: the rooftop garden.
"...So, Sister Emma, you have troubles with cathedral life?"
"Yes... It's so sinful and painful."
"Speak freely. I'm listening."
Emma hesitated to the last.
'Is it okay to voice such blasphemy?'
But she couldn't bear this burning heart alone any longer. Finally, she mustered courage.
"The truth is... every time I think of the Saintess..."
Once the dam broke, her pent-up anguish poured out unchecked.
Tales of small kindnesses that tormented her, like that recent gift.
"Even now, when we pass, she calls my name with that bright smile... My heart drops every time. It's almost resentful... She's too kind."
Confessing it all like absolution brought initial relief.
But then came the dread of her blunder.
How dare an apprentice nun spout such nonsense about the Church's idol.
A chill gripped her nape—
Then her senior surprised her with a gentle nod.
"Don't worry. I fully understand your feelings, Sister Emma. It's natural for new apprentice clerics to go through this."
"Pardon?"
Emma could only gape at the unexpected reply.
Agnes smiled faintly at her junior.
"Anyone would be drawn to the Saintess. She's so beautiful and unguarded—it's only natural, right?"
"....."
Emma was dumbfounded.
She'd thought it was her unique, horrific sin—turns out it was a rite of passage everyone endured quietly.
Agnes continued.
"It's especially potent for young nuns and deacons who see her often. That's why there's unspoken advice passed among apprentice clerics, regardless of gender: 'Don't fall for the Saintess's kindness. You'll only torment yourself.'"
"......"
Facing this shocking truth, Emma couldn't hide her stunned look.
Her senior added jokingly.
"Between us, we call it the final hurdle before the sacrament of character."
Snapped from her shock, Emma stammered.
"H-how... did you overcome that hurdle, Sister...?"
"Overcome? You think so?"
"Yes?"
"Sometimes it's easier to tuck it away than face it head-on."
Emma was speechless again.
Right then—
Crack!
A sharp snap echoed from the garden shadows behind them.
They whipped their heads toward the sound.
◇◇◇◆◇◇◇ Crack!
"....."
"........."
Feeling the snapped twig underfoot, I broke out in cold sweat.
How did I make such a blunder?
I hadn't caught the tail end clearly, but the conversation cutting off meant they'd noticed something off.
"......"
Any closer inspection, and I'd be busted.
In the ominous silence, I held my breath, playing statue.
Then—
"Sister Agnes, Sister Emma."
A familiar voice called from another direction, halting them.
"Yes?"
"Senior Nun Trisha was looking for you both."
"Ah, thanks for passing it on."
They answered and hurried off.
The garden fell quiet.
I let out a sigh of relief.
Then that familiar voice called again.
"Lady Eve. They're gone. You can come out now."
I stepped from behind the garden foliage, grinning sheepishly.
"Thanks for the save, Esty."
I pocketed the comms device I'd been fiddling with.
Sensing their talk dragging on, I'd called Esty here.
To defuse naturally and slip away.
Overhearing private woes pricked my conscience, even if circumstantial.
'Most of it I couldn't hear anyway...'
They'd whispered so secretly, I missed most details.
Still, the bits I caught were so shocking my face must've stiffened.
Esty had noticed and asked.
"Lady Eve? What happened?"
"Oh, well..."
I couldn't shake the bafflement—or the sudden injustice.
So I vented to my staunchest ally.
"Seems the apprentices find my demeanor... troublesome? I was just being kind to help them adjust to cathedral life, since we'll be together... Was my approach all wrong?"
Sure, a division commander visiting frontline troops for morale was more nuisance than kindness.
But I didn't think my actions reached that level.
'I kept it low-key, focusing on little things to avoid burdening them...'
Newbies struggle everywhere.
I'd tried to ease their transition, yet treated like a sinner? It felt unfair.
I protested vigorously, and Esty, hearing the full story, looked puzzled.
"I don't think you did anything wrong either, Lady Eve..."
But her eyes lit with sudden realization.
She flipped her stance.
"...You did wrong. From now on, mind your distance and demeanor with others."
"Pardon...?"
I could only stare, dumbfounded.
It felt like my trusted axe had chopped my own foot.