The Bombarding Saintess (1)

One week. Long if you think about it, short if you don't.

Some people waste an entire week doing absolutely nothing. Others pack those seven days so full of activity they barely have time to breathe.

But I could say this with absolute certainty:

No one on earth had spent a more spectacular week than me.

Why?

"Maria. As the Saintess chosen by the Goddess, will you lead Her humble servants?"

Until a week ago I had been a perfectly healthy Korean guy who had even finished his military service. Now, after just seven days, I was one step away from becoming a Saintess in a fantasy world.

Who else could claim a more spectacular week than that?

I sighed inwardly.

Outwardly, I answered the question with perfect sincerity.

"I will."

"If you are resolved, take up the Holy Relic. The Goddess will answer."

The Pope held out something wrapped in cloth. That had to be the Holy Relic.

I sighed again, deep and heavy. I must have sighed hundreds of times over the past week.

…How the hell did it come to this?

The whole mess that turned me into a Saintess I never asked for started simply enough.

I heard that a new DLC had dropped for Grand Fantasy, a fantasy game that most people rated poorly but that I had genuinely enjoyed. The reviews claimed it was basically a completely different game, so I bought it with high hopes and booted it up.

When I came to my senses, I ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠was Maria—a character from Grand Fantasy.

For the record, I had never seen Maria before in my life.

My mind was already shattered by the sudden transmigration when, as if to deliver a finishing blow, I woke up the next morning with a strange mark on my hand.

It turned out to be the mark of a Saintess.

Also for the record: the original Grand Fantasy had priests, but no Saintesses.

Naturally I was all but dragged to the Holy See, met the Pope, and was told I had to undergo the Saintess ritual. Only then would I receive a Grace from the Goddess and become a true Saintess, or something like that.

So for the next few days I learned the basic etiquette a Saintess was supposed to know.

And that brought me to the ceremony happening right now.

Looking back, it doesn't seem like that big a deal.

From the inside, that week had felt like years.

Anyway, I cut off the useless thoughts and accepted the Holy Relic the Pope held out.

I carefully unwrapped the cloth, revealing what lay inside.

An ordinary wooden stick. That was the Holy Relic's true form.

I wasn't surprised.

I already knew the relic hadn't shown its real shape yet.

Once I gripped it, the Goddess would bestow a Grace upon me, and the relic would transform in response to that Grace. In short, it would become my ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠personal exclusive item.

I already had a rough idea of what Grace I would receive.

A Saintess was still a cleric at the end of the day. And in Grand Fantasy, clerics were healers.

So of course a Saintess would receive a Grace suited to the healer role.

In fact, most past Saintesses had received the Grace of Protection, just as I expected. Those who didn't got the Grace of Healing instead.

I would probably get one of those two as well.

"Clear condition."

I whispered the words so quietly no one else could hear.

A translucent window only I could see formed in front of my eyes.

The Bad Ending was the extinction of humanity, so I had to struggle just to survive. Extra motivation was always welcome.

Without a second of hesitation I gripped the Holy Relic with both hands.

I could see nothing.

I could hear nothing.

Yet I felt no fear. If anything, a gentle warmth wrapped around me.

Ah. The Goddess. I knew it instinctively.

I see. So my Grace is Bombardment.

…Huh?

Wait a second. I misheard that, right? What Grace? Not Protection or Healing?

Goddess? I think You gave me the wrong one?

The Goddess spoke once more.

So I hadn't misheard.

Then light swallowed me whole.

I slowly opened my eyes.

And I saw what the Holy Relic had become.

It was large and beautiful—exactly the kind of laser cannon that belonged in a science-fiction movie.

Only then did the reviews from people who had played the DLC make sense.

Yeah. It really was a completely different game. The genre had jumped straight from fantasy to sci-fi.

A hollow laugh tried to escape. I held it back.

Every gaze in the hall was fixed on me.

The ceremony wasn't over yet.

I still had to announce to everyone what Grace I had received.

I hesitated for a moment, then finally spoke.

"The Grace bestowed upon me by the Goddess is… the Grace of Bombardment."

And thus, a Bombardment Saintess the likes of which history had never seen was born.

The moment the ceremony ended and I reached my room, I flopped onto the bed without even taking off my ceremonial robes.

Then I shot a sideways glance at the large, beautiful Holy Relic resting in ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠the corner.

"Could you at least have kept the fantasy aesthetic…?"

What the hell even was that thing? If you're going to call yourself a fantasy game, there are lines you shouldn't cross.

Even more annoying: it wasn't portable.

The relic was roughly my size, and there was no way to shrink it.

Thankfully the Goddess, apparently worried about the carrying problem, had added one extra function.

It could float five centimeters off the ground and automatically follow me. It even had an on/off switch.

Holy crap, user-friendly features? This thing is a must-buy!!!

"…Ugh."

Nothing but sighs came out. That was how hopeless I felt right now.

"Status window."

Of course nothing happe—

Something happened?

"……Huh? Huuuuh?!?!?!"

Why is this showing up only now?! A few days ago I had desperately shouted for a status window and gotten zero response!

Of course the window didn't contain the stats, skills, or inventory I had hoped for.

But having something versus having nothing was still a massive difference.

If there was anything at all, I could find a way to use it.

I carefully reread the status window.

According to the text, new functions would unlock every time I met certain conditions.

Wondering if I could see the unlock conditions, I poked around the window.

"Unlock conditions! Condition list! …Guess it won't tell me the conditions."

Right. If it just handed me the conditions it would be too easy. I was supposed to figure them out by slamming into walls myself, huh?

I immediately grabbed the bell sitting on the desk and rang it hard.

A moment later came a knock.

I went straight to the door and flung it open.

A young, kindly-looking priest stood outside.

"Saintess. How may I serve you?"

"Does the Holy See have a training ground?"

I refused to believe the answer was no. There were combat-oriented Holy Knights; there had to be a place to train.

At my sudden request the priest's previously unshaken expression wavered just a little at the corners of his mouth.

Ah, maybe I needed more explanation. I added it right away.

"I need to test this thing."

I tapped the Holy Relic floating gently behind me as I spoke.

The priest's eyes began to shake violently.

Ah. So what had happened during the ceremony still hadn't been announced to the entire Holy See.

Maybe I was supposed to keep a low profile until the official proclamation.

I shelved that thought for later. What could possibly go wrong?

"This is the training ground."

"Ah, thank you."

Having somehow finished guiding me, the priest stepped back. I took one step forward.

An ordinary athletic field… no, that wasn't quite right.

Training equipment and weapons that would make even hardcore gym rats pale were lined up along one side, radiating an ominous presence.

By the way, was it really okay for a medieval setting to have workout machines that looked like they belonged in ‍‍‌‌⁠​​⁠‌​​‍​​‍​‌​⁠‍‌‍⁠⁠‌⁠‌‍‌‍‌‌‌‍⁠​‌​‌​‌‍‌‌‌⁠‍​​‌‍⁠‌‌⁠⁠a modern gym?

I immediately decided not to think about it.

If I started picking at details like that, I would first have to pick at the Holy Relic floating behind me.

Anyway, the place was empty. I had expected at least a few Holy Knights to be training.

Bad timing, maybe?

That meant I would have to find what I needed myself.

I began scouring the training ground for anything that could serve as a target.

But this was my first time here; of course I had no idea where anything was.

There were bows, so there had to be targets somewhere.

I scratched my head and simply gave up looking for them.

Today was just a simple test. Targets weren't necessary.

I lifted the Holy Relic floating at my back.

It was large enough that when I first saw the transformed version I had worried I wouldn't be able to lift it.

Surprisingly, it wasn't that heavy.

Was it light only for me?

"Excuse me, could you try holding this for a moment?"

I called to the priest who had guided me. He immediately looked flustered.

"Th-the Holy Relic, you mean?"

"There's something I need to check. Quickly, please!"

He hesitated, but when I urged him again he finally approached.

I handed him the relic. He carefully accepted it with both hands.

And immediately set it down on the ground.

He put it down so fast that a loud thud echoed through the training ground.

"I-I'm so sorry!! It was simply too heavy and I—!"

"It's fine. I'm actually grateful. That confirmed one of the things I was curious about."

Apparently some kind of correction was applied so that only I could lift the Holy Relic lightly.

That would be useful in combat too.

I nodded and lifted it again with ease.

"Good. Let's try firing it."

There was no trigger on the grip. I wasn't surprised. From the moment I received the Grace of Bombardment, the method of firing had simply been etched into my mind.

All I had to do was hold the grip and decide to bombard; the Grace would accept that decision and carry it out.

I aimed at a target, pictured myself pulling a trigger in my head, and thought I heard a metallic click.

Light gathered. I instinctively recognized the light collecting at the muzzle as holy power.

I also felt something leaving my body—probably the sensation of holy power being drawn out.

And then—

The first bombardment of a Saintess that would be recorded in history took place.