Prologue: The Day Earth Became 'Jujis'
WEEEEENG—! A silver flying object orbiting the blue planet Earth.
Whirrr— Unlike sluggish artificial satellites or space stations, this dish-shaped monstrosity zipped around the globe at the speed of light, lap after lap.
Shwoooong... And soon after, the craft pulled away from Earth, coming to a halt in the middle of the black void of space.
Beep-boop— Beep— In front of a panel glowing with colorful circuits.
"Phew. This tour was a blast too, right Bujis?"
"What a fascinating planet. To explore a world like this with you, Jujis—I'm one lucky octopus!"
Wriggle, wriggle... Pink and blue octopus-like creatures bobbed their dozens of eyes and legs, letting out gasps of admiration.
To them, those few lightning-fast laps around Earth at light speed had been the full-course tour—enough to grasp everything there was to know about the planet.
"By the way, about that planet's dominant species, 'humans'? Don't you feel sorry for them?"
"Why? They've built a pretty decent civilization for themselves, haven't they? Sure, their progress is slow, but still."
Bujis replied to Jujis's question, recalling human culture and technological development.
"Nah, not that. This."
Twitch—! But Jujis extended one of its tentacle legs, giving a serious look with its eyes.
Twitch— Twitch— What they'd taken for just a leg ended in a shape reminiscent of an animal's male organ—a glans.
And it wasn't just that one; every single tentacle tip was formed like a penis.
"True... They only have one penis each, can't even self-replicate, and need a male-female pair just to reproduce."
"Exactly. If they had multiples like us, plus self-reproduction, they could increase or control their numbers way more efficiently..."
"Buddy, not every species can be advanced."
Bujis's consoling words made Jujis glance out the window at the blue planet, twitching several eyes.
"How about we leave a little gift for letting us enjoy such a beautiful world?"
"Jujis... You don't mean...?"
"Yeah. Help their reproduction go a bit smoother—take a step toward becoming a higher species?"
Bujis nodded its octopus head multiple times at its friend's kind idea.
"Spot on! With that method, humans could evolve more efficiently without breeding issues."
"Yup. Oh, got it prepped! Beam fire ready."
"Jujis, this is gonna be a revolutionary change for their species. Mind if I press the button too?"
"Go for it, friend."
Twitch—! With that, Jujis and Bujis's blue and pink tentacles slammed down on the red button.
Zzzzzing— BEEEEAM—!!! An enormous blast of energy shot from their oval UFO straight toward Earth.
Fwaaaah—! A white glow spread precisely through the atmosphere, enveloping the entire planet.
"Perfect."
"We'll check back later."
Shwoooong—! Having fired the beam, Jujis and Bujis rode their UFO into the stars, promising to return someday.
And on Earth, struck by the mysterious beam...
"Gaaah—! My body... it's melting!"
Plop...!
"Eek—! The guy's turned into a dick!"
Perfectly healthy men turning into dicks all over the world... Squelch... Wrggle... Wrggle...!
Literally becoming Jujis.