The Tteokbokki Incident
After turning off the stream, I fell into a brief moment of existential dread. "Man... my life is total garbage."
"We'll spin the roulette before I end the stream. For now, give me some lunch recommendations."
"Hmm... none of those sound good." Various foods flooded the chat, but nothing caught my eye. Then, one stood out.
"Oh! Tteokbokki sounds great." I was feeling stressed, so I craved something stimulating. I opened a delivery app to place an order.
"Ahem, I usually just eat gukbap or spicy pork, you know? I'm just craving tteokbokki today."
"Hm? I'm just getting some from a local snack shop. Not spicy." As soon as I said that, the chat was flooded with 'Narak' (hell/doom) comments.
"Yeah, no. The Queen doesn't listen to you guys." I ignored them and tried to order. Then, a mission popped up right before I clicked confirm.
[MISSION: Order Yeop-tteok Spicy Flavor]
[Amount: 10,000 KRW]
"Uh? Um... but 10,000 won is a bit..."
The chat was overwhelmingly critical. "No... I can get delicious tteokbokki for 10,000 won, why would I get expensive, spicy stuff?"
[Amount: 20,000 KRW]
"20,000 won... I'm a bit conflicted."
[Amount: 25,000 KRW]
"... Okay, deal!" As the amount hit 25,000 won, I deleted the cheap snack shop tteokbokki from my cart and ordered the spicy Yeop-tteok. "Hmm... I don't need sides, right?" I was determined to spend as little as possible.
"Anyway, it's ordered. Let's chat until it arrives."
"Don't you commoners have any questions for me?"
"Is it uncomfortable? If you don't like it, leave... actually, don't leave. Should I change it to be more casual?"
"I mean, it'd be nice to talk casually, but wouldn't that break the RP?"
"Why this RP? Honestly, I just wanted to stir up some drama..."
"Maybe a little bit of it is real?"
"Oh, nice kill, manager." I praised my manager for instantly executing a viewer who made a family-insulting comment.
"It's not that it's *real*... it's just that I had those thoughts when I was younger, that's all."
After some more rule explanations and Q&A, the food arrived.
"The tteokbokki is here! I'll go grab it!" I stepped out to the door. "Oh." I made eye contact with the delivery driver waiting for the elevator. "SLAM!" I was so startled I slammed the door shut. 'He didn't see me, right?'
Even if he did, he wouldn't have recognized me properly. 'Besides, even if I were caught, it wouldn't be a huge problem.' The chat was in chaos.
"Ahem, nothing special... I just wanted to close the door firmly." Thankfully, the viewers didn't suspect anything. I opened the package. "It doesn't look that spicy." Contrary to my expectations, it looked delicious. "I'll take a bite." I shoved a mouthful of rice cakes and fish cakes in.
"Chew, chew... it's not that spi—"
"AH! SHIT, IT'S SO SPICY!! WHAT IS THIS!"
"AH! IT HURTS!! IT HURTS SO MUCH!!!" I finally understood why spiciness is classified as pain rather than taste. I threw my headset aside and ran to the bathroom, sticking my tongue under the faucet. "Blehhhhh."
Five minutes later, I sat back down. "Huff, huff. Is this funny to you guys?"
"I'm ending the stream. Bye." I just cut the feed.
Ten minutes later, I looked at the saliva-covered tteokbokki. 'Is it a waste to throw it away?' I decided to toss it. Just as I was about to, a knock came at the door. "Knock, knock!"
'Who is it? The delivery person?'
"Who is it?" I asked cautiously.
"Ugh... it's the neighbor. I have something to say, so open the door."
'The neighbor?' I remembered there being no one living next door. This was dangerous. I shouldn't open it. Then, a message appeared.
> [It is the neighbor.]
"What?" I opened the door slightly. "Wait, you're a woman?"
"Yeah. And you're way too loud. I can't take it anymore." She looked at me closely and concluded I was a woman. Her attitude shifted immediately. "Why is your voice like that? Did you have surgery? Are you doing that 'Net-nabe' (male pretending to be female) thing?"
"Net-nabe?"
"Don't play dumb. Cut your hair and get rid of those tits. Oh wait, you don't even have any. Was that surgery too?"
I tried to explain I was a man, but she wouldn't let me. She demanded I turn on my stream and reveal I was a woman. "Anything? You'll do anything?"
"Yes! Anything!"
She grabbed me and threw me down. "I hate people like you! I've been scammed by people like you since elementary school!" She put me in a heel hook. "AHHH! IT HURTS!!!"
She paused, feeling something strange against her foot. "What the hell is this?"
"What do you mean, what is it! It's my dick, you idiot!!"