Chapter 144
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 144
Chapter Title: The Mayor and the Holiday
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Holiday.
Long weekend.
Consecutive holidays.
Holidays are happy.
Happy, and thus cruel.
Because they aren't eternal.
Surely yesterday's 24 hours and today's 24 hours should be physically the same length.
But they feel different.
Yesterday's time crawled along at a turtle's pace, jammed up like the riverside expressway commute.
Today's time races by in an instant, like the Olympic Expressway at dawn.
Tick. Tock.
The clock's second hand sounded like a countdown to execution day.
Why does happy time slip away so fleetingly?
Why does the calendar so cruelly herald the end in red?
Ah, unwanted thoughts keep bubbling up.
The most horrific word in the world.
Work.
'Back to work starting next week.'
[Pink-Haired Secretary: Mayor, have you checked Monday's schedule? Please make it to work on time.]
[President Jin Yeonhwa: Hey, Lee Garam. Chuseok's boring. Wanna hit Jirisan? There's a half-moon bear monster out.]
[Sugargirl: Too busy with the new songpyeon bun menu ㅠㅠ But when's the mayor coming??? You didn't eat tteok instead of bread, right?????]
"Uwaaaaaah!!"
The work-related messages creeping out from my smartphone notifications gave me chills.
I decided to resist this absurd flow of time.
How?
Self-deception. Autosuggestion.
Yes. Fool my own body.
What's the core of Chuseok holidays?
Food.
Fried pancakes dripping with oil, sweet songpyeon, a feast of braised short ribs.
Even if my brain registers that the holiday is over, what if my stomach keeps taking in Chuseok food?
My body will be tricked into thinking the holiday isn't done yet.
This is a kind of Pavlovian conditioning.
Chuseok food comes in → Still holiday time.
Perfect logic.
What a genius idea.
"Alright! Come to me, tteok and jeon!"
I hauled my body up slowly, like a sluggish grub.
Target: the fridge.
Grandma's bundles full of love would be waiting for me.
All kinds of jeon stinging my nose with oil.
Songpyeon bursting with sesame and honey.
Just imagining it made saliva pool in my mouth.
I opened the fridge door with a victorious smile.
And then.
Silence.
Empty.
Nothing but my usual zero cola and a few water bottles.
"Huh?"
Did I see wrong?
I closed the fridge door and opened it again.
Still the same.
"No way, Grandma definitely packed bundles full."
Did my memory get tampered with?
I clearly remember the mountain of food bundles piled at the front door yesterday.
I even saw Seria moving them to the kitchen.
So where did they go?
A 'Sealed Room Food Evaporation Incident' worthy of Neo Incheon's Seven Mysteries.
That was when it happened.
Nom nom nom—
A suspicious munching sound came from behind a plush cushion in the corner of the living room.
I crept toward the noise.
And witnessed the crime scene.
My cat.
Tri-color furball.
Neo Incheon's mascot.
Nero Claudius Caesar Augustus Germanicus.
Munch munch—
He was savoring the last skewered jeon, gripping it firmly with his front paw.
And around him, the wreckage of demolished jeon and tteok lay scattered.
A massacre site of holiday food.
"You..."
Nero looked up.
Oil gleaming at the corners of his mouth, rice cake crumbs on his nose.
Nyaa!
He just tilted his head with an innocent expression.
Those brazen eyes screaming, 'What's the problem?'
Anger surged.
"You, you...! You ate it all? All of it? By yourself?"
Nyaa nyaa.
It felt like, 'Why didn't you eat it faster?'
Finders keepers.
First come, first served.
The law of the jungle. Survival of the fittest. Winner takes all.
"My holiday... in your belly..."
My holiday extension plan! My simple happiness!
This little furball devoured it all!
"You rascal!"
I lunged forward.
But Nero was already one step ahead.
With nimble moves, he leaped over the dining table and landed on the other side.
Myaaong?
'You think a mere human can catch a cat?'
The beast's arrogant smirk.
"Don't move!"
Nyaa!
And so began our breathless chase.
Living room, study, bedroom.
The whole house became our game of tag arena.
Nero acrobatically leaping between furniture.
Me scrambling after him.
Whenever I slid or dove where he was, Nero rolled up the carpet to block my path.
"Huff... huff... huff..."
After a long chase, I finally cornered him.
"It's over! Prepare yourself!"
I dove and grabbed his hind legs and tail.
Heavy, soft texture.
Got him!
It was a long journey.
A grueling battle.
But victory belongs to humans in the end.
"Haha! Now for a hundred chestnuts!"
But.
Neroooong—
Like rubber.
Like cheese.
Like a liquid monster.
His body stretched unrealistically long.
His lower half was clearly in my hand.
But the head I needed to flick was way out of reach.
Nyaa. Nyaa. Nyaa.
He twisted his head to mock me with a 'Serves you right, human' look.
"What the..."
I alternated glances between the cat's lower half in my hand and the upper half far away.
A hollow laugh escaped me.
Right, he's not just any cat.
He's the superpowered cat that sends S-rank monsters flying with one paw.
I had to admit defeat.
I let go limply.
And then...
Whoosh, snap!
The lower half in my hand snapped back like a rubber band and rejoined the upper body.
Nyaak!?
Startled by the sudden docking, he leaped into the air.
Back to normal.
A perfect cat form once more.
Nero shook himself off, then approached me with haughty steps.
And started rubbing his head against my leg.
Nyaaaaang—
'My bad. But it was too tasty. You'll forgive me, right?'
That calculated charm.
Strategic cuteness.
Capitalist cat survival tactics.
"Sigh..."
Fine, maybe Grandma packed the food for Nero.
She loves the cat more than her grandson anyway.
"Got it, got it. You win."
I scratched under his chin.
Purrrr...
He purred contentedly.
Time to pick another option.
I picked up my smartphone.
Delivery app. Oasis of modern man.
But.
[Closed today for Chuseok holiday.]
[Delivery may be delayed due to driver shortage.]
[Boss went back to hometown.]
Despair filled the screen.
A list of stores all grayed out.
"No way, how can this be."
Chicken, pizza, jokbal, Chinese.
All my favorites rejecting me.
"In this massive city, among all these people, no shop to save a starving mayor?!"
Yes.
Everyone's day off.
Even self-employed folks need family time.
But me.
I'm hungry.
Right now, I'm not Mayor Lee Garam—just a starving human Lee Garam.
"No choice. Gotta go out."
I stood up resolutely.
Nyaang!
"Nero, let's hit the market. Chuseok's last romance is surely there."
Sinpo International Market.
Yes, let's go there.
"See? Good call not bringing the car. On a day like this? Parking would've taken all day. I'm so wise. My judgment is impeccable."
Nyaa.
Nero's curt reply, like 'Isn't that obvious common sense?'
This guy's starting to resemble me.
We got out of the taxi after crawling through traffic, and the market's noise and smells hit us all at once.
Crowds. Crowds. More crowds.
A massive river of humans flowing.
"Come on, folks! Pick and choose!"
"Tteok here, fresh songpyeon!"
"Fish is fresh!"
Lively voices. Savory oil smells. Sweet hotteok aroma.
"Hey! Isn't that the mayor?!"
"Mayor Lee Garam!"
"Look at that cat! It's Nero, Nero!"
The moment we entered, voices recognizing me popped up everywhere.
Yes, I'm this city's mayor. And beside me, superstar cat Nero.
"Mayor, huge fan! One photo!"
"Nero! Over here!"
"First time seeing Nero in person!"
I waved with a benevolent smile.
"Haha, nice to see you. Enjoying the holiday?"
On the surface, the loving mayor who adores his city.
Inside, totally different.
'I'm starving. Move it.'
After a long fan service session, I finally pushed through the crowd.
"Mayor, try our dakgangjeong before you go!"
The famous dakgangjeong shop owner at Sinpo Market handed me a cup full.
I speared one with a toothpick and popped it in.
Crispy batter, spicy-sweet sauce.
"Mmm! Delicious!"
I handed some to Nero too.
Nyaang!
He snapped up a small piece and wagged his tail happily.
Is dakgangjeong okay for cats?
A fleeting doubt.
Eh, Nero's special.
Superpowered cat.
Digestion must be super too.
Our eating spree continued.
"How much?"
"Aigoo, how can we charge the mayor? On the house. Samples, samples!"
Free food is always right.
Steaming king-size mandu.
Seed hotteok dripping honey.
Crispy veggie tempura.
Savory tteokbokki.
Salty sundae.
"This is it. Exactly what I wanted."
One hand full of snacks, the other feeding Nero as we roamed the alleys.
"Kuh, this is the market's romance."
Sharing tasty food amid bustling crowds.
Primal joy. Vibrant energy.
Where cold capitalism meets human warmth.
"Hmm, maybe grab some fish or fruit."
But the romance ended there.
When I stopped at a fruit stand to shop properly.
I hit reality's wall.
Apples, pears, grapes.
No price tags on the luscious piles.
"Boss, how much for a bag of these apples?"
"Aigoo, Mayor! You know the good stuff! I'll pack the ripest ones special!"
Hold up.
I didn't say I'd buy.
The owner ignored my question and deftly started bagging apples.
Felt off, but I chalked it up to market generosity.
But suspicion turned to annoyance.
Unhygienic cutting boards at the fish stall, reused side dishes at the banchan shop.
The final blow at the traditional sweets shop.
Colorful gangjeong and yukwa piled high.
"How much for this?"
I pointed at a safe-looking pile of ginger candy.
"Aigoo, Mayor! Try a piece first."
The owner smiled warmly and offered a shard.
I took it cautiously and crunched.
Crispy.
Just ordinary candy taste.
"How is it? Good, right?"
"Eh, sure."
"Alright, you tried it, time to buy! Special big pack for our mayor!"
Suddenly, he shoveled candy into a bag.
Plopped it on the scale and shouted.
"There, 70,000 won!"
"What? 70,000 won?"
Looked like 5,000 won stuff from the corner mart.
"No, this is too much. Just factory candy."
My reasonable point. But the owner didn't blink.
"Eh, prices are skyrocketing these days. Small merchants like us are dying! And it's already bagged!"
Ridiculous. I burst out laughing.
Time for the last resort.
"Excuse me, do you know who I am?"
I asked with maximum dignity, subtly flexing mayor authority.
"Of course! Our great Mayor Lee Garam!"
He fawned exaggeratedly.
"So you gotta buy more! Mayor knows our struggles best. Show some understanding!"
What twisted logic.
Being mayor here was a weakness.
Not authority, but sucker stamp.
"And it's Chuseok peak season! Peak! This boosts local economy! Right?"
Peak season? So because it's peak?
Logic that peak means rip off?
Office workers toil 365 days a year—why do merchants jack prices only on holidays for profit? Fair?
And traditional market?
Is 'traditional' the right word for this?
Tradition of overcharging? Unhygienic tradition? Price-fixing tradition?
This isn't traditional—it's just an old, outdated market.
In the end, I pulled out my wallet.
"Aigoo, Mayor. Sorry, card reader's broken. Cash only."
Argh.
I paid cash through gritted teeth.
The moment I took the 70,000 won candy bag, emptiness washed over me.
Right then.
Whoosh—
The bag in my hand vanished instantly.
I turned to see Nero with his mouth agape, swallowing the whole bag.
Crunch crunch. Smack smack. Ptoo.
70,000 won evaporating.
I just stared in stunned silence.
The age of barbarism is over. Time to return to civilization.
I was utterly fed up with the market's chaos and irrationality.
I turned toward the big supermarket.
It'll be different there, right?
Escape the primitive, enter a place of systems and rules.
Auto doors slid open, cool AC and capitalist scent welcoming me.
Pristine marble floors gleaming under bright lights.
Shelves in perfect rows along calculated paths.
Yes. This is it.
Of the consumer, by the consumer, for the consumer.
Unlike the street market forcing rip-offs, filth, and emotional labor under 'traditional' guise.
"Yes, this is it."
Nero in the shopping cart seemed thrilled too.
Nyaa nyaa?
Especially the sampling corners—heaven for him.
"Here, custo— customer~ Try our new sausage~"
Nero dashed over and slurped the offered sausage.
"Oh, he eats well!"
"So cute!"
"Chubby eating face!"
Mandu corner, cheese corner, even sikhye sampling.
Nyaaaaap—!
Nero vacuumed samples everywhere.
And as a cat, no side-eye.
No responsibility. Cuteness is the ultimate weapon.
"Nero in person!"
"Only saw on Nyanstagram, even cuter!"
Crowds gathered.
But staff didn't care.
They loved it.
"Mayor, want some?"
Staff offered me sausage too.
"Ah, thanks."
I ate one.
Tasty.
Tastier because free.
This is the supermarket advantage.
Market?
'Tried it? Buy it!' silent pressure.
Here?
No pressure. Sample only. No buy needed.
Staff doesn't mind. Encourages it.
Because systems. Manuals.
'Eat up!'
Way more pleasant than the market.
But.
Not perfect paradise.
Everything neat, but sterile.
No lively human market vibe.
And crucially, expensive.
Or felt expensive.
"1+1 sale!"
"Buy two, special discount!"
Sneaky pricing tempting consumers.
Need one, but 'one more' whisper makes you grab two.
Seem like constant discounts, but original prices inflated.
Phone search showed online malls cheaper.
Card discounts, carrier memberships, points...
Layered conditions hid true prices.
Info warfare.
If market's bare-knuckle robbery, supermarket's armed with legalese scams.
In the end, same everywhere.
Different methods, same goal: empty your wallet.
For quick eats, maybe market rip-off better.
Conclusion.
Both annoying.
Traditional market and supermarket.
Barbarism and civilization.
Neither satisfied me.
Sudden rage boiled.
I started quiet revenge.
Headed to ramen corner.
Grabbed spicy-famous ramen.
Shoved it in the 'gap' between display and wall.
Pfft.
Childish, but felt better.
Next, canned goods.
Grabbed cat tuna, snuck it among human tuna cans.
Imagining future confusion made me chuckle.
Finished petty payback, grabbed a few dinner items casually, and left.
Back home, flopped on the sofa.
Today's two markets.
Traditional and supermarket.
The more I thought, the more both pissed me off.
One rips you off openly, the other deceives slyly.
"Can't take it. Gotta punish them."