Chapter 104
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Translator: penny
Chapter: 104
Chapter Title: The Mayor and Gravity
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What do I do at the pinnacle of power?
The correct answer is 'do nothing'.
Do nothing with intense vigor.
Do nothing to the point of suffocation.
Do nothing with all my might.
Sink into the plush leather sofa, remote in my right hand, bag of potato chips in my left, staring blankly at the TV screen.
This is the realm of enlightenment I've reached.
A state of nirvana. Nirvana. No, Nitvana.
Nyaah-
Nero, curled up by the window grooming itself, let out a lazy mew.
That little guy gets it too. The futility of labor. The cosmic truth that only those who don't work are truly free.
Plush sofa, crunchy snacks, all-powerful remote, and a cute cat.
The perfect elements of an afternoon.
Of course, if only that mountain of unsigned documents on the desk wasn't there.
But I ignore it. If I don't see it, it doesn't exist.
Descartes was wrong. I don't think. Therefore, the things I have to do don't exist.
"Hmm~ Let's see."
I let out a meaningless hum and pressed the remote button.
[Today only at this price! The bulletproof vest certified by Hero 'Iron Heart'!]
"Eh, that guy's retired and just does home shopping now."
Click.
[We can never be together! You're a hero, and I'm a villain's daughter!]
[I don't care! If we have love!]
[...Can you love a villain like me?]
"Morning drama starting with forbidden love? The world's really going to hell."
Romeo and Juliet. A story milked for over 400 years. Has humanity's creativity finally hit rock bottom?
Click.
[Today, we'll make a dream mapo tofu that can even captivate a monstrous beast's appetite!]
"Would a monster be satisfied with just mapo tofu? Nero, would you eat mapo tofu?"
Meow.
Nero replied as if annoyed. Cats really are wise.
Click.
[BREAKING NEWS!]
[Emergency Report]
The screen filled with red subtitles, urgent background music blaring.
I shoved some chips in my mouth and focused on the screen.
[At this moment, S-Rank villain 'Gravity Zero' has appeared in Rodeo Street, Guwol-dong, Namdong-gu...!]
The anchor's voice rang out desperately. The screen shook roughly as it switched to live helicopter footage.
A woman with purple twin tails. Floating calmly in the air in a black spacesuit-like costume.
She giggled and lightly spread her arms.
Kugugugugung-!
The screen vibrated wildly. A 20-story shopping mall slowly rose into the air. Nearby buildings started floating up like toy blocks.
"Whoa... The CG looks so realistic. How much money do they pour into these tokusatsu shows these days?"
Graphics like that are almost Hollywood blockbuster level, right?
Cute actress, great direction. Should I sponsor this with city budget?
"It's live, Mayor."
Seria Park appeared behind me like a ghost, setting down a cup as she spoke.
"I know! I know too! Of course I know! You think I'm an idiot?!"
"You're not an idiot."
Oh? An unexpected response. Seria defending me?
"Right! That's what I think too!"
"You're closer to a fool than an idiot. Foolish Mayor."
No need to say it twice.
"...Is that better?"
"Who knows. Idiots are innate, but fools are acquired, so there's room for improvement."
"So there's hope?"
"Theoretically. But in your case, Mayor, it seems chronic. I'm impressed by that escapist imagination dismissing reality as CG right in front of your eyes."
Run away. Talking to Seria just stabs daggers into my heart.
I quickly turned back to the TV.
S-Rank villain Gravity Zero. A superpower who manipulates gravity, as her name suggests. One of the top powerhouses in the original story.
Habitual terrorist. Hobby: flipping cities. Specialty: levitating buildings. Hates Isaac Newton.
Her goal isn't destruction or murder. Just 'flipping' things.
She floats city buildings into the air and drops them in weird places. Like moving a department store from Guwol-dong to the top of Gayasan Mountain, or slamming an apartment into the mudflats of Eulwangri.
A total psycho. She just enjoys pure chaos.
On screen, Special Task Force Captain Kang Jiyeong arrived in her black uniform.
She reached out into the air, and the floating buildings stopped rising.
Kwadududuk-!
Gravity manipulation versus metal manipulation.
Gravity Zero's anti-gravity field pushed the buildings upward, while Kang Jiyeong's ultra-high-density magnetic field pulled the steel frames down.
Invisible colossal forces clashed, making the airborne buildings vibrate.
A matchup that would make physics textbooks weep.
Aaaah-!
Screams from citizens trapped inside, rolling around, pierced through the camera.
Ah, those poor people. Went shopping and ended up on a rollercoaster.
Wait, thinking about it, Neo Incheon citizens might see it as a win? They saved on amusement park tickets.
[The 17th clash between S-Rank villain Gravity Zero and Special Task Force Captain Kang Jiyeong has just begun!]
"She's back again? She's so diligent. Doesn't she ever get tired?"
Gravity Zero sat gracefully with legs crossed 10 meters in the air.
"Why do civil servants work so hard? Bonus pay? Sense of duty? Haha, funny. You think that changes the world?"
"Stop endangering citizens right now."
Classic by-the-book Kang Jiyeong. Her lines are straight out of a textbook. People like her keep the world turning. And let me slack off.
"Citizens? Oh, you mean those ants wriggling down there?"
"Order is necessary for citizens' peace."
Dozens of cars floated like ping-pong balls between the two.
Car ping-pong. Citizens' precious property became weapons bouncing in the sky.
Gravity Zero reversed gravity to launch cars upward; Kang Jiyeong pulled them down with magnetism and fixed them to the ground.
"Order is an outdated idea. Everything flows, changes, flips—that's nature's law. Stagnation just rots. Like you civil servants."
"Surrender quietly instead of spouting sophistry."
"Oh, sophistry? Then let me ask: Who decided this city's order? Why do the rich live in Songdo while the poor rot in rundown areas? Is that order too?"
Kang Jiyeong gritted her teeth. One floating building tilted slightly then steadied.
"It's the minimum consensus for everyone to live safely. Imperfect, but order is necessary. Disorder brings greater suffering."
"Pfft! Consensus?"
Gravity Zero clapped and laughed.
"Did I ever agree? Why follow rules set before I was born? It's just 'rules favorable to someone'."
Gravity Zero snapped her fingers; several corporate signs floated up.
"You know? I grew up in an orphanage. What I learned there? 'Line up orderly and wait.' But even waiting, my turn never came. Why? I was a problem child. That was their order."
"Don't project personal misfortune onto the whole."
"Oh, personal misfortune... What about you? Why obsess over order? Scared you'll crumble without it?"
Kang Jiyeong clenched her fist. Metal debris around vibrated sharply.
"So levitating buildings and endangering people is justified?"
"Danger? No, freedom! Liberating from outdated gravity laws. Look at them! Flying for the first time in their lives? New perspective, new world! Revolution!"
"That's not revolution. It's terrorism."
"Aah, don't use scary words like terrorism. This is decentralization."
Decentralization from Earth.
Gravity Zero cackled and wagged her finger; the department store Kang Jiyeong barely held trembled again.
"So what should we flip today~? Lift this whole thing and smash it into City Hall? That'd be fun, right?"
The order guardian versus the order denier. Their values clashed as much as their powers.
No wonder Kang Jiyeong's always busy. Dealing with that girl every time.
"Freedom without up or down, without set paths. I'll flip all you suffocating people upside down."
Gravity Zero spread her arms wide and shouted.
At that moment, even through the screen, everything felt lighter.
Not just floating buildings—people on the ground floated up a few centimeters.
Kya aaak!
Citizens screamed, flailing in the air.
Humans instinctively fear the moment their feet leave the ground.
Gravity is our friend. Long live Isaac Newton.
"How dare you!"
Kang Jiyeong's eyes gleamed coldly.
She controlled all metal structures around, magnetizing the entire city to the ground.
"Tch."
Gravity Zero pouted like it was no fun.
"You're too serious. Boring."
She yawned, then stood.
"I'll head out for today! What to play next~? Oh, right, that hot Neo Incheon Mayor lately—hang him from a building top?"
What? Me? Why me!
What did I do! I was just lying on the sofa watching TV!
With those parting words, space around her warped like a vortex and she vanished into a wormhole.
Left behind: buildings precariously floating then settling back, wrecked streets, and dazed citizens.
"Sigh, Captain Kang has it rough."
I clicked my tongue and turned off the TV. Fun show's over.
Back to my time. Z-Rank Mayor Lee Garam, ability: slacking off.
I approached Nero and kneaded its soft belly.
Grrr...
Nero purred happily. Yeah, this is peace.
"Nero, let's not live that hard. Just eat, play, sleep like this forever..."
"Playtime's over, Mayor."
The usual peace-breaker voice.
"You haven't forgotten this afternoon's schedule, right?"
"What schedule? You said nothing today?"
"When did I? I told you clearly. Monthly orphanage volunteer day. Reminded you three days ago, yesterday, and confirmed this morning—and you brushed it off with 'Mm, yeah, sure' every time?"
Ah. Right. That existed.
"...It's hot. Can't I just roll around with Nero here? Mayor's rest is part of welfare too."
"I see."
Seria adjusted her glasses, staring. Her cold turquoise eyes seemed to pierce.
"Do that then. Instead, handle the Guwol-dong terror recovery budget emergency allocation, victim compensation plans, disaster relief application review and approval, Special Task Force extra budget request, insurance claim responses, press briefing materials, citizen safety measures meeting prep... All by tonight."
She nodded at the desk's document mountain.
I swallowed hard. All that? By tonight? Physically impossible.
"Aaaah..."
I raised both hands in surrender.
"Fine. I'll go. Happy now?"
"Wise decision."
Damn. Played in this secretary's palm again.
Nyaaang. Nyang. Nyang.
Nero making cheeky sounds like 'Get to work, human.'
"But I'm taking Nero too! Can't tolerate me working alone! You suffer with me for fairness!"
Nyaaang?
Nero trembled in shock.
"Alright, let's go Nero! Volunteer work! Labor! Exploitation time!"
Myaaaooong~
Nero stretched long, then hopped lightly onto my shoulder.
*
The official car glided through quiet residential streets in Gayang-gu.
A pastoral scene utterly unlike the villain's levitation show that turned downtown into a mess.
It made sense for an orphanage to be here.
Land's cheaper farther from the center. Orphanages are always on the outskirts.
Outskirts of society's attention, budget, everything.
Regular volunteer work. Politicians' most clichéd, effective image-building tool.
Though for me, escaping the document pile was the bigger goal.
The sign 'Sprout House' appeared. Rustic but honest name.
The front door opened; a woman greeted us.
Thick horn-rimmed glasses. Beige cardigan. Ankle-length skirt. Gentle, intellectual vibe.
Perfect orphanage director cosplay. No, she really is.
"Welcome, Mayor. You didn't forget this month either."
She smiled softly and bowed.
"Ah, yes. Of course. Director. Uh... what was your name again..."
"Jeon Bokhui."
Jeon Bokhui?
Jeon. Bok. Hui.
Bokhui.
Pfft-
Laughter burst out involuntarily. I bit my lip hard to stifle it.
Bokhui in the 21st century. On such a young, intellectual woman.
The mismatch between name and image created destructive comedy. This is cheating.
She caught my tiny twitch; her eyebrow twitched. Eyes narrowed behind glasses, glaring.
"Cough, cough! Ah, my throat's a bit..."
I fake-coughed desperately to recover.
"Such... a great name. Full of blessings and all..."
Worst compliment ever. Even I got chills.
"...Thank you, Mayor."
Her voice dropped an octave.
She's mad. Definitely 200% mad.
She just stared silently.
Cold silence.
Then, tiny saviors appeared.
"It's the Mayor!"
"Nero! Nero!"
Kids swarmed, clinging to my legs.
Orphans... no, little angels! Sprouts!
"Mayor, what are we playing today?"
"Can I pet Nero?"
"Nero, remember me?"
I was surrounded in seconds.
"Yeah yeah, everyone doing well?"
I awkwardly smiled, patting heads. Still awkward sometimes.
Nerorong-
Nero jumped off my shoulder, stretching long.
Streeetch-
Its body elongated like rubber, spanning the yard.
"Whoa! Nero slide!"
"Kyaha!"
"Fun!"
Nero shapeshifting into a slide like liquid.
This guy's better at socializing than me.
A cat superior to the mayor.
Is this right?
Seems so.
Sad but reality.
But I have a way. Adults fight dirty.
"Hey kids! Mayor brought yummy stuff!"
Power of capitalism. Might of money. Art of bribery.
Delivery guys filed in on cue.
Ten pizzas, twenty chickens, gift boxes piled in the yard.
"Woooow!"
Kids' cheers pierced the sky.
Nero's slide forgotten instantly.
Director Jeon Bokhui looked shocked.
"No need to bring so much... It spoils the kids."
"Eh, kids should eat well. Gotta grow big and strong, right?"
I smiled benevolently. Inside, dark evil plans writhed.
My long-term impeachment project.
'Future generation brainwashing operation'.
Early education's importance can't be overstated.
Values imprinted young last a lifetime. 'Three-year habits last to eighty' is truth.
Today, I'll plant dangerous, subversive seeds in these pure minds.
Anti-Lee Garam-ism. Anti-Mayor ideology. Impeachment supremacy.
Such terrifying thoughts.
I gathered kids in the playroom, distributing pizza and chicken.
While they stuffed faces, I stood before them.
"Okay, kids. Pay attention a sec. Mayor uncle's got a fun story."
Eyes turned to me. Sparkling, pizza sauce smeared on mouths.
"Listen up. Uncle's actually a really bad mayor."
Kids' eyes widened.
"No way! Liar! You bought pizza—how bad!"
One kid shouted.
"No, really. I hate work, always scheming to slack—the worst mayor. So when you grow up to vote, never pick someone like me."
I continued solemnly.
"Not just me. Mayors aren't needed at all. Why elect one? Why be ruled? It's all a system to oppress us!"
My voice heated up.
"Citizens can live fine without mayors! No—reject voting altogether! True freedom starts by denying all presets! That's why I don't work!"
Despite my passionate speech, kids just stared blankly.
Too hard? Lower the level?
Then, a smart-looking boy in glasses raised his hand.
"So Mayor's... at the top of the oppressive system, resisting by not working—a bad, corrupt mayor!"
...Perfect!
This kid's a genius! IQ 200 at least!
"Ch-Cheolsu! Don't say that to the Mayor!"
"Sorry, Mayor! He's still young..."
Reporters and caregivers paled.
"Exactly! You're so smart! Great kid! Here, gifts!"
Kids are pure. They see the essence.
I gave Cheolsu three gift boxes in.
Other kids buzzed.
"Mayor is bad!"
"Laziest, meanest mayor ever!"
"Lee Garam, step down!"
Kids chanted in unison.
I nearly teared up. My education spreading so fast!
Plan success. Anti-Lee Garam front will spread like wildfire among these pure kids.
Neo Incheon's future is bright. Once they grow, my impeachment's guaranteed.
Wait, how many more years of mayor life then?
Anyway, satisfied, I handed out gifts wildly.
Then, whispers from the corner.
"See? Told ya. Say that, get more gifts."
"Wow, really. Hands out gifts like crazy. Mayor's super nice."
"Anyway, chant impeachment together next time, maybe get new game consoles!"
...What?
I doubted my ears.
They lied about me being bad for more gifts?
These capitalist sprouts.
I sighed in defeat.
Modern kids... scarily shrewd. Where's the purity?
As I wrapped up volunteering to leave.
A voice from behind.
"Mayor."
Director Jeon Bokhui.
"What exactly did you just tell the children?"