Chapter 99: Zoo Outing (2)
They'd said it was full of rare animals, and sure enough, there was plenty to see.
In this world where all sorts of realms had merged together.
Those merged worlds were each just a little different from one another—some felt like parallel universes or something, while others were completely alien.
Take the lizardmen, classified as one of the non-human races, for example.
They called themselves Dragonia, and research had revealed they were dinosaurs from my original world that had evolved after going extinct long ago.
Anyway, with all these worlds mixing, places like that were bound to pop up.
Worlds with no beings you could even call people.
Worlds of beasts and animals only.
They'd gathered up all the animals from those worlds and set up artificial ecosystems tailored to their original habitats in separate zones. The zoo felt like a grand summation of countless realms crammed into one spot.
No way there wouldn't be shit to see here.
You didn't even need to look at the animals—the zoo itself was a tourist attraction.
Thanks to that, I got to see an animal that was either my mortal enemy or one I personally held a grudge against.
"What's wrong? Wanna pet it? It's cute."
"I hate rats."
Especially ones that spat electricity.
Wererats like Bella from the beastkin were human enough despite their rat features, so I could overlook them. But plain old rats? I fucking despised them.
"Is that so? It's so cute... What a shame."
Crackle, zap.
Lilith and Hoaran were petting the baby rat that could barely manage a light static shock since it was still young, but no way in hell was I touching those fuckers.
Why would I pet the little shits that kept me unemployed for two years?
"...They are kinda cute-looking, I guess."
They were chubby and adorable, but still, no touching.
The two of them were stroking away without a care, but I'd seen others get zapped hard after touching them.
Unless I was rock-hard, I was just a normal human with average physical abilities. Touching it would fuck me up for sure.
"Anyway, let's move on."
I checked what was next, and a familiar name popped up.
"What's next?"
"Something cute?"
"Nah, some people think it's cute, but..."
Most folks found it fucking disgusting. It was an animal you could see on every street corner in my world, but apparently it hadn't adapted well to the changed reality and was now endangered. That was written right there with the name.
What a ridiculous name.
"Let's skip this one."
"Why?"
"Is there some reason?"
"It stinks pretty bad."
They nodded like, well, can't be helped, so I skipped that bullshit and looked for the next one: something called a kirin.
There was a photo attached.
A pure white horse with a majestic horn. And a bunch of other animals with various horns—it seemed like they grouped together beasts with single horns, true to the name.
"Heh, a horse with a horn? Cool."
Lilith peered at the pamphlet I was holding and said that.
I turned to her. "Mom's got horns too."
"Shut up."
She pinched my side. Hard as fuck. I twisted in pain, and she huffed and turned away.
Hoaran came over, asking if I was okay, then looked at my pamphlet.
"What a pretty horse."
It really was gorgeous.
A pure white horse with a shining white horn—fucking majestic.
"Alright, let's go check that out."
We skipped the zone with the whatever-the-fuck creatures and headed straight for the kirin area. There were a ton of people there.
I wondered why, but figured it out quick.
"Hiiing~"
The kirin—no, unicorns—from the photo were everywhere. Pure white ones named unicorns.
Up close, they were bigger than normal horses, with way longer horns. Fucking epic.
They looked straight out of myths, the kind heroes rode into battle.
Probably why they were so popular.
And sure enough, some were approaching people, offering their heads to be petted.
Kids, women, even guys squealing as they stroked the kirins' heads. Seemed like super gentle animals.
"Let's hurry!"
"Hmm, more docile than they look."
Lilith and Hoaran said that watching the crowd.
These two had petted every touchable animal so far without hesitation.
Now I knew they both loved stroking cute critters.
Hoaran was openly eager to pet one, and Lilith was pretending not to care but her shoulders were twitching. I quickened my pace.
How close did we get?
The kirins that had been munching grass or nuzzling people suddenly all lifted their heads and stared our way.
What the?
Suddenly they all rushed over, shoving their heads at Lilith and Hoaran.
"Hiihiiing...!"
"Hiiing!"
Dozens of them, drawing every eye.
"What the hell?"
"I don't know exactly, but they seem awfully fond of people."
The two were a bit flustered at first, but since they were behind bars, they reached out and started petting the kirins begging for head rubs.
"Heh... Soft fur."
"The horn is quite pretty too."
Lilith and Hoaran murmured while stroking manes and horns.
I had no clue why, but the kirins looked fucking ecstatic.
What the actual fuck.
"Hanjo, come pet them too. They're such good kids."
"Me too?"
"Yes, come on, give it a try."
Hoaran urged me, so I figured what the hell and approached.
"Prurk...!"
"Puheheng!"
The kirins freaked and backed away.
"Uh..."
They scattered like I'd shown up with shit on my face or something.
Except the massive one Lilith was petting—all the rest bolted. I smacked my lips.
"...At least one's still here. Pet that one."
Hoaran looked awkward after suggesting it only for them to flee.
I felt bad for her expression, so I called to Lilith, who was still stroking the remaining kirin.
"Mom, lemme pet that one too."
"Huh? Yeah, sure."
She stepped aside easily.
This one wasn't fleeing like the others, so I thought it was safe.
"Prrrruk...!"
Why the phlegm-rattling growl?
Was it sick?
Then—
"Ptoo!"
It hawked a loogie right in my face.
Splat.
Straight through the bars, dead-on hit.
Now my face was covered in sticky phlegm.
I couldn't process what just happened at first, but the rancid smell hit me, snapping me back to reality.
That fucking bastard?
I glared, and it flicked its tongue like what're you gonna do, growled, and trotted back to the herd.
Spitting a fat glob on the ground too.
"...That fucking horse meat wannabe?"
Watching the phlegm drip down my face and its shitty ass, I cursed. Lilith burst out laughing.
"Guess your face isn't its type."
"A-Are you okay, Hanjo?"
Lilith stifled her giggles, and Hoaran panicked since she'd told me to pet it. I wiped the gunk off my face.
They'd been so gentle with her and Hoaran.
Hell, they ignored most people except a few. Why me? Why the spit-take?
"...Smells fucking rank."
What the hell did it eat to stink like that?
"L-Let's clean the smell first."
Hoaran snapped her fingers as she approached, and poof—the phlegm on my face, clothes, and the stench vanished. Felt way better.
"Says here kirins are friendly to the pure-hearted but get mad at the impure. Guess your black soul pissed it off."
Lilith read from the pamphlet, souring my mood again.
"What'd I even do?"
Hoaran maybe, but Lilith was hardly pure herself.
They did cozy up to kids a lot, so it wasn't total bullshit, but admitting I wasn't that pure would mean owning why they freaked and spat. Fuck that.
Way easier to call 'em crazy horses.
"...So, what's next?"
I decided to chalk it up to shit luck and move on. Lilith answered.
"The doppelganger I mentioned earlier."
Doppelganger, huh.
According to Lilith, a slime subspecies.
Unlike intelligent slimes treated as people, doppelgangers lacked reason or intellect, so they were monsters. They mimicked the appearance of things they saw or people they encountered.
Pure mimicry—no more than copying looks. But they did it pretty damn well, so I was curious.
"Let's go see the doppelgangers."
I wanted to get the fuck away from those shitty kirins.