Relief
Someone who has been betrayed can no longer trust people.
Just like a dog that has been abandoned once can no longer blindly welcome a human's touch.
"I-I'll... I'll go get something else..."
Watching Yuna try to hold back her tears as she headed toward the master bedroom, I realized something.
She hadn't believed me.
You could call it a misunderstanding, but perhaps a deep-seated distrust of the figure of a "father" had built up inside her.
"..."
Yuna thought I was going to leave tonight.
She had assumed that once the day's activities were over and she fell asleep, I would be gone by the time she woke up.
"Yuna."
Yuna froze in her tracks on her way to the bedroom.
To think she would stop like that at a single word from me, even after steeling her resolve.
Just what kind of existence was a father to her?
"Come here."
I said, still sitting in my spot.
Yuna trembled as she slowly turned back to face me.
"W-Why...?"
I realized just how much weight my words carried for her.
So, I had to choose my words carefully. Very carefully.
"Come sit here first."
"I-I'm going to get something else..."
Yuna shook her head, trying to head back to the room anyway.
"Yuna."
She really seemed to think I was leaving tonight.
That must have been why she followed me out when I stepped out to take a phone call earlier.
At my call, Yuna turned around once more.
Rubbing her tear-rimmed eyes with the back of her hand, she walked over and stood in front of me.
"..."
Anticipating an impending farewell is a painful thing.
It's something everyone goes through at least once in their lives, but it was far too early and far too heavy for an eight-year-old to bear.
Did I ever have an experience like this when I was young?
No.
"Sit next to Daddy. Right here."
I said, gathering the scattered puzzle pieces back together.
Yuna sat down beside me, continuously wiping away her tears.
"..."
How should I say it?
No, what should I do in the first place?
To be honest, I had wanted to sleep at my own place tonight if possible.
Sleeping at someone else's house was incredibly uncomfortable, after all.
"Yuna."
But how could I do that now?
"Daddy wants to finish this puzzle."
"...!"
Yuna's face instantly went pale.
She shook her head frantically.
"N-No, it's okay. This is boring. Let's do something else..."
She tried to stand up again.
I gently caught her arm. Her skin felt frail and cold.
"We can finish this and then do something else."
I spoke as casually as possible.
If I sounded too serious, she might burst into tears again.
She had already cried so many times today.
Crying any more than this might make her sick.
"Even if we don't finish it all, we can just do it again when we wake up tomorrow."
I divided the gathered puzzle pieces in half.
This time, no pieces were missing.
Yuna stared at me for a moment, looking utterly bewildered.
"W-When we wake up... tomorrow...?"
"Yeah."
We can do the puzzle, read your favorite books together...
By saying that, I implied there would be no farewell.
"..."
Yuna dropped her head and fell silent for a long moment.
"...Hehe."
Finally understanding my words, her fragile expression softened.
She threw her arms around me again, hugging me tight.
A faint smile bloomed on her face.
Was that a smile an eight-year-old should be making?
I ran into a monster at school today.
It had a weird rat-like head and tried to eat me. It looked so different from the monsters I've seen in cartoons, anime, or documentaries.
Just when I was about to die without being able to do anything...
*BAM!*
Mister protected me.
I don't remember exactly what happened.
My only memory is Mister holding me and running, then jumping out the window.
But...
"..."
I looked up at Mister's face from inside his arms.
Even though he isn't my real dad, he risked his life for me.
"..."
I gripped Mister's collar tightly.
He smelled faintly of clean blankets.
The magical girl sister came and talked to Mister.
It seemed like she was the one who defeated the monster.
Pink Rose is my favorite magical girl, but...
"..."
I still liked the blanket smell on Mister's clothes better.
That's what I decided.
After we got home.
I felt happy for some reason, so I asked Mister to read me a picture book.
It was a picture book I brought home from school to read with Mom, but...
"The magical girl had someone she loved."
For some reason, I thought it was okay if Mister read it to me.
I almost cried after he finished reading it. Or did I cry?
I kept thinking, what if Mister leaves me too?
But Mister told me he wouldn't leave me behind.
I felt a little relieved.
I must have fallen asleep after reading the book.
I was hungry, but Mister was sleeping on the sofa.
"..."
He had a silly face. It looked funny.
But I didn't want to wake him up and make him work, so I decided to make food myself.
I also thought it would be nice to make some for Mister too.
How would he react? He'd be so surprised, right?
"...Hehe."
A few days ago, Mom taught me how to prepare a meal by myself.
Scooping the rice was easy.
*Ding!*
...But.
"Hot—!"
I heated up the container of curry in the microwave, and when I tried to take it out, I didn't realize how hot it would be and ended up spilling it all over the floor.
I was so upset that I started to cry.
Am I just a dummy who can't do anything without Mom or Mister?
I tried to wipe up the curry with a towel before Mister woke up, but it only smudged and spread.
"Ugh, uuuuugh..."
I cried because it felt so unfair.
Then I made eye contact with Mister, and I cried even more.
For some reason, it made me feel even sadder.
Mister cleaned up the curry like it was nothing and made me black bean sauce rice instead.
Of course, black bean sauce rice is also one of my favorite foods, but...
"..."
I wanted to make the curry so we could eat together.
When I grumbled at him, Mister reluctantly started eating too.
"Hehe."
Just a little bit, I wished Mister was my real dad.
How silly of me.
After I finished eating, Mister told me to go to sleep.
It was only four o'clock...
Suddenly, I got scared. Was he trying to leave now?
Mister isn't my real dad.
This isn't his house, and one day, he will go back to his own home.
"..."
And I thought maybe that day was today.
What if Mister goes home?
Mister said Mom would be back in a week.
If Mister leaves, I'll really be left all alone again.
I don't want that. I'm scared...
*Clatter.*
I brought out a puzzle to keep Mister here no matter what.
It was a magical girl puzzle Mom bought me for my birthday, but I had shoved it in my room because it was too hard.
"L-Let's do this together, Daddy."
I brought it out for him.
Was the puzzle not hard for Mister?
He started completing it so fast.
Panicking, I kept knocking the puzzle over, pretending it was an accident.
"..."
When I messed it up once or twice, Mister just said it was okay and kept putting it together.
By the fourth time, Mister asked me,
"You're not doing this on purpose, are you?"
I was doing it on purpose, but I pretended I wasn't.
Mister believed me.
Maybe he got better after a few tries, because his speed got even faster.
At this rate, he was going to finish it in ten minutes.
"Daddy, you're too fast..."
So I pulled apart all the pieces he had put together and handed them to him one by one.
That slowed him down a lot.
But...
I felt like once the puzzle was finished, Mister would go home.
I don't know why, but that fear consumed me.
"Daddy, can't we leave it like this and finish it tonight...?"
For the first time, I threw an ugly tantrum.
And when Mister wasn't looking, I hid a few puzzle pieces in the bathtub.
I hoped this would keep him here just a little longer.
I was worried Mister would be mad at me for being stubborn.
But instead, he took me to an expensive meat restaurant.
"..."
Whenever I ate out with Mom, it was always the snack shop in front of our house.
I looked at Mister sitting across from me.
I felt so sorry.
"Daddy has plenty of money."
...This time, I wished even more that Mister was my real dad.
By the time we got home with me riding on Mister's back, I had fallen asleep.
It was strange because his back was wider than Mom's.
"...?"
But...
When I woke up, there was no one around.
"D-Daddy?"
Not in the room, not in the bathroom, not in the kitchen, not on the living room sofa.
Mister was nowhere to be found.
"..."
I opened the front door and ran outside just like that.
Mom always said monsters might take me away at night, but that didn't matter right now.
I just hoped Mister hadn't gone far.
No wonder.
No wonder he took me to that expensive meat restaurant.
He wanted to give me a nice memory before we said goodbye for the last time.
*Patter, patter...*
I ran down the villa stairs, my bare feet hitting the cold floor.
Tears were already falling at the thought that Mister had left me behind.
I'm scared, I don't want this, please...
Why did I have to fall asleep? Seriously...
"Daddy! Daddy...!"
Running out into the dark night like that, I cried out and was about to run straight onto the stinging concrete floor, but...
"...!"
Right next to me, I saw Daddy—no, Mister—looking at me with a startled expression.
"*Hic, waaaaah!*"
Overwhelmed by sorrow and fear, I threw myself into his arms and sobbed.