The Death of an Ordinary Citizen (2)
People change. That much is a given. But actually feeling that change is an entirely different matter.
Because the one changing is ultimately yourself, it’s not easy to realize that you’ve become someone else. Yet, there are moments when you suddenly look back at yourself and think, "I’ve really grown," or "I’ve changed so much." In those moments, you can feel as if you’ve become a completely different person.
That’s how I felt right now.
Like I was someone else.
"This is seriously weird."
I had always considered myself, if not a model citizen, at least a decent, upstanding young man. I was the kind of person who would return a greeting warmly, help someone struggling with a heavy load on the stairs, and offer my seat to an elderly person with a cane. That was the extent of my character.
And that’s why, when I walked straight across a crosswalk despite the bright red signal, I finally realized it.
The character Aurizel was connected to me far more deeply than I had anticipated.
A wicked impulse was spreading inside me like ink in water. It wasn’t just the simple irritation one feels under the scorching summer sun. It felt as if a fundamental part of me, deep within my heart, had been altered. It was as if the mechanism that judged right from wrong had been ripped out and replaced with something else entirely...
I felt a sense of crisis. I realized that if I kept going like this, I might truly lose my original self forever.
Once people get used to something, they adapt to it, no matter what it is. Even with a personality as twisted as this, once it became me, I would eventually adapt. And after that, I wouldn’t even feel this sense of dissonance anymore. I might calmly commit horrific acts, just like the Aurizel in the novel I wrote.
"Let me help you with that."
"Oh my, thank you."
I couldn’t let that happen. I am a civilized person of the 21st century who has completed a formal education. Unless I were from some third-world hellhole where fists speak louder than the law, everyone raised in this land has a duty to fight against the evil within themselves.
So, I decided to fight.
I approached an elderly woman carrying a heavy load and took it from her. My gut churned at the thought of doing something I didn't want to do, but I gritted my teeth and endured it. I didn’t stop there; I spent the entire day greeting people more brightly than usual, picking up trash on the streets, and walking a lost child home.
Life is, in the end, a repetition of small habits. There’s a reason why parents in the old days would shave their kids' heads and send them to a temple if they seemed to be turning into delinquents. Our ancestors knew the wisdom that if you keep doing good deeds, you eventually become a good person.
"God, this is so annoying, seriously..."
Of course, it wasn’t easy. Thinking that I was wasting my time on such meaningless tasks made me feel so nauseated it was unbearable. And that unpleasantness, coupled with my unfulfilled desires, grew increasingly severe. It reached the point where I started imagining killing whoever passed by me.
The moment I realized that forcing myself to endure it wouldn’t work, I applied for entry to a nearby Gate.
If I couldn’t keep suppressing it, the best way was to vent those urges in a positive direction.
The reason I chose a Gate instead of a Tower was simple. Once you enter a Tower, you can’t come out for a month, so there are many things to prepare. A Gate, on the other hand, allows for free entry and exit, and since it was a place I was familiar with, the choice wasn't difficult.
The only problem was that monsters could come out of them, too.
To explain in more detail: The Tower is for intensive growth, where you can level up and acquire skills quickly. The Gate is where you use the power you’ve grown. Unlike the Tower, monsters can spill out of it.
The structure was designed so that it helped everyone if you wiped out the monsters inside the Gate as much as possible.
However, not just anyone can enter. Especially for B-rank Gates and above, there are many variables, so the entry requirements become extremely strict.
The place I was going today was the D-rank Gate in this neighborhood.
It was a place I knew like the back of my hand from my days as a Porter.
The entry requirements were simple: Have no physical or mental disabilities, or be an Awakener of D-rank or higher.
Since ordinary people are forbidden from entering C-rank Gates and above, this was effectively the best Gate I could enter right now.
I should get my Awakener License renewed when I have time. And get my Hunter Registration, too. It looks like I’ll have to be visiting Gates whether I like it or not.
"This is the D-rank Gate, Elowen's Forest. You’re an ordinary citizen, and you’re alone. Is that correct?"
"Yes. That’s correct."
High-rank Gates are managed by local guilds, but these small-fry Gates are mostly under the jurisdiction of the Hunter Association. The female employee in a neat suit explained the precautions to me with a kind smile.
"General electronic devices do not function inside the Gate. If you happen to have any, please leave them in the storage locker or keep them well-packed in your bag. As you know, Elowen's Forest is a low-rank D-rank Gate, but the flesh of the Slimes and Zombies that appear there contains acid, which can cause mild skin burns, and there is a risk of blindness if it gets in your eyes, so please be careful..."
I knew all of this already.
Listening to things I already knew in such agonizing detail made me strangely angry again. Get a grip. She’s just doing her job.
"Thank you for the kind explanation. Have a great day."
"Yes. Have a safe adventure."
I forced my trembling lips into a smile and stepped inside. The moment I entered, the scent of grass hit my nose.
"Ha. This nostalgic air."
I took a deep breath. The smell of thick soil and trees cleared my head. My attire was the same: a gray hoodie and jeans. I added the bag I used to carry during my Hunter days. I feel at ease when I have this bag.
I’d carried it my whole life.
A C-rank Hunter is usually a rear-support personnel.
What is rear-support personnel? A Porter.
No one calls us that to our faces, but everyone knows it. Among ourselves, we actually call it being a Porter. Since we don’t do anything other than carry luggage, it’s an accurate title.
So, even though I’d bluffed about being a Hunter, it had been a very long time since I’d actually faced a monster head-on.
I looked around with a pounding heart.
"A Slime."
A Slime. Its status seems to have risen quite a bit in modern fiction, but the Slimes of reality are nothing like that. They’re so pathetic that even a B-rank Enhancement-type Hunter could catch one with their bare hands and play with it like a stress ball. This guy couldn’t even melt clothes properly, so wearing long sleeves and long pants was enough defense.
So, it was perfect for me to test my current specs safely.
"Shall I try it...?"
I muttered softly and flicked my finger downward.
*Vrrrrm—*
At that moment, the world stopped with a jolt.
"......"
Everything around me held its breath so slowly that it felt like time had frozen. Even the falling leaves didn't descend, as if they were preserved in that split second. My thought process must have accelerated at least a hundred times.
However.
Within the frozen world, there was something moving at high speed.
I could feel it.
*BOOM!*
My hair was yanked violently backward. The wind whipped around for a few seconds. My weapon, which had fallen like a bolt of light from the sky, created a massive shockwave. Naturally, the Slime melted and vanished without a trace, and a crater was gouged into the ground where the spear had struck.
I had just wondered what would happen if I dropped it quickly after seeing it move freely, but the result was beyond my expectations.
To be honest, I was dumbfounded.
What rank would this be? Is it B-rank upper-tier? Could it be A-rank?
As a guy who only worked as a Porter in the back, I couldn’t judge it accurately. But one thing was certain: it was definitely not C-rank.
"This is unsettling."
I wonder if I’ve been given a power too great for an ordinary citizen like me, who would be satisfied just being able to lie down and watch videos on my phone before bed. Being stronger is a good thing, but doesn't great power come with great responsibility? With my current personality, I don’t think I could endure it if someone started bothering me...
My thoughts didn’t last long.
The roar from my previous attack seemed to have attracted the surrounding monsters. Perhaps because I have rabbit ears, I could guess the number, size, and shape of them just by hearing their faint footsteps. About twenty Zombies, perhaps?
The Slimes must have run away from the vibration, leaving only the stupid Zombies to swarm in.
[Ggggrrrr...]
I frowned. A mass of stench, walking slowly and sluggishly with a horrific appearance. You shouldn’t think of the athlete-like Zombies from movies. Real-world Zombies are barely maintaining their form with weak Mana, and their physical abilities are on par with a dying old man.
You ask if they become stronger if they hold more Mana? Then that’s a Death Knight, not a Zombie.
Anyway.
"Die."
I waved my hand toward the Zombies. Spikes the size of a person rained down like a downpour.
*Thwack, thud, splat—*
This time, I adjusted the speed so it wouldn’t cause the same shockwave as before, but a metal weapon of that size has enough mass on its own. The bones and muscles of the already-rotting Zombies fell apart like paper every time they were pierced or grazed by the spears.
From that point on, I finely adjusted my movements, piercing them in a straight line from the top of their heads to the bottom, or pinning their limbs to the ground to play with them. It was a very grotesque scene, treating things that were already corpses in such a way.
Strangely enough, those sights were nothing but delightful.
Amazingly, it was more fun than watching videos on my phone before bed. To think I could relieve my stress while doing the good deed of killing monsters. Perhaps Hunter work had become my true calling.
"It would have been better if they were a bit fresher."
I dismantled all the Zombies thoroughly and laughed refreshingly. I had killed things back in my C-rank days, but I had never enjoyed it like I did today. Yet, there was still a lingering sense of disappointment.
How should I put it... something more lively...
I found myself thinking that I wanted to kill a monster that was stronger than these.