Sparkling and Warm
Once Reni had wriggled himself into a spot on the sofa, I sat down with the kids tucked against either side of me.
Across from us, Kelly settled beside the enormous camera and launched into the interview with real enthusiasm. She seemed quite pleased—maybe the shots she had already captured were to her liking.
"I've already familiarized myself with the recipes, of course, and everything about the dishes you made together. So how about we talk about something a little different today?"
I gave a short, incredulous laugh and protested.
"Hey, that's not what we agreed on, Kelly. Did you trick me?"
She had said we would just film something based on the interviews we had already done, so there was no need to be nervous.
Kelly smiled slyly and went straight into her first question.
"As a young dad raising two kids, what's the hardest part?"
"Hmm…"
I turned the question over carefully.
Was she asking about money? Or something else entirely?
I was still trying to figure out a safe answer when Kelly sharpened the question.
"For example, it can't be easy to go out and hang with your friends at night."
Ah. That kind of thing. The answer came out on reflex.
"That part's fine. I don't have any friends."
"Ah…"
Kelly lost her words. Reni's head snapped up and he looked at me.
"Daddy, you don't have friends?"
He laid his small hand over mine, eyes wide, as if the idea that his dad had no friends had genuinely shocked him.
"No, I mean—look, Reni. Every weekend when you go to the church you play dolls and tag with your friends and have a great time, right? Daddy just doesn't have friends to play with like that. Of course Daddy has friends! They're just all busy with work…"
The more I talked, the flimsier it sounded, but I pushed through to the end.
"Anyway, being young doesn't make anything particularly hard. If anything, people around me say it's better that I'm still in my twenties—my stamina can keep up."
"But twenty-five is the age when you want to go out and have fun the most, isn't it? Date, too."
"I've never really been interested in that sort of—"
I felt the conversation needed a gentle redirect, so I shifted the answer that had almost come out on autopilot.
"The old me just… never really knew how to live happily."
"The old you? So things are different now?"
I smoothed Reni's hair—he still looked quietly stunned by the whole "Daddy has no friends" revelation—and answered.
"Yes. These days I spend every single day thinking hard about how to make life a little better."
I told her how a guy who never cared about interior design now fretted over whether the bedding matched the curtains. How someone who barely turned on the lights had discovered the glory of good lighting, and now wandered every forgotten corner of the grocery store.
"Before, I only looked for whatever was convenient, cheap, and familiar. Now I look for prettier things, better quality even if it costs a little more—anything that can make life more colorful."
"That's an enormous change."
"It is. Honestly, back then I barely did anything, so my body was a lot more comfortable… but I'm much happier now, even though I'm so busy I barely have time to breathe."
I was living a life of constant new challenges.
"Of course there are moments when it gets overwhelming, when anxiety and worry grab hold of me."
I smiled faintly, remembering the past year.
"But I keep discovering new things, and I've met so many people I'm grateful for."
The world itself hadn't changed; it was the same as always.
"Once I decided I wanted to change, at some point I found myself living a completely different life."
I had learned that simply breathing and moving your body wasn't the same as being alive.
"Still, change itself can't have been easy. Was it the kids who gave you that courage?"
"Yes. Every single moment I draw incredible strength from them. The love and energy they radiate is just… enormous. Ah, of course…"
A whole parade of scenes flashed through my mind like a highlight reel.
Luca flinging his spoon onto a floor I had just cleaned. Reni leaving food on his plate and refusing to eat.
The days when Luca used to lie quietly while I washed him—those now felt like a lie, because bath time had become an all-out underwater battle.
Reni, who seemed endlessly gentle and well-behaved, yet turned out to have a surprisingly stubborn streak and launched "Why?" attacks at any hour.
Luca bolting the second I got one sock on him. Reni, who lately insisted on wearing mismatched socks and nothing else.
"…"
I gave a tiny shake of my head and shoved those exhausting moments into a corner of my mind. Focus on the good things for now.
But Kelly was a seasoned interviewer.
"There must be wonderful times, but there are also hard moments because of the kids, right?"
"Hmm…"
I looked down at the two children leaning against me.
Reni, who understood every word, peered up at me from behind his sunglasses with eyes that said, No way. Impossible.
I pressed a light kiss to his hair so he wouldn't be disappointed, then gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze.
Our Reni… I thought you were pure of heart, but it turns out your conscience is a little flexible…
Luca, who had not yet discovered the concept of conscience, rested his head against my stomach and kicked his feet back and forth. He looked ready to drift into a nap right there.
Come to think of it, the three of us had fallen asleep sitting just like this during the baptism, too.
"When I film YouTube videos every day and watch the kids grow, I can really see how fast they're changing."
Instead of answering directly, I redirected.
"So even when parenting gets difficult sometimes, it doesn't feel so much like hardship as… regret. Like I'm always wishing for more time."
"I see."
Apparently deciding she wouldn't get anything further out of me on the subject, Kelly changed course.
"Then shall we talk about your main work, Author?"
"Sure."
"Most YouTubers I know stick to one focused topic—games, music, cooking, that sort of thing…"
"Yeah, that's usual."
"But your channel has so many videos showing expert-level skill across so many fields that 'all-rounder' almost feels like an understatement."
"I never planned it that way from the start. It just… happened. There were so many things I wanted to do for the kids, but the cost was always a burden, so I started making this and that myself. Those videos piled up, and it naturally became what it is."
"Even so—sewing, woodworking, cooking, baking, ceramics, and music on top of it. I still can't believe one person can do all of that at a professional level."
I smiled without meaning to. Last time she had asked if I did ceramics too; this time she must have combed through the entire channel.
"That's right! Our daddy is amazing at everything!"
Reni, who had been quietly listening to Kelly's praise, chimed in with full support.
I gave an awkward little laugh. There wasn't much I could say to that.
"I turn out to have pretty good hands, I guess…"
"I'm genuinely jealous. And I heard you recently even founded a studio under your own name."
We had never discussed the studio with her. Evan must have tipped her off separately.
It was another chance to promote the channel, so I answered with energy.
"Yes. Honestly, I was the kind of person who had never even taken a selfie. I had zero interest in social media…"
"Good heavens. How is that possible?"
"I just never liked having my picture taken. Then something happened and I suddenly decided I needed to become an influencer…"
It hadn't been a bad decision.
"There's something strangely grounding about feeling like I'm really here, you know?"
Because I was documenting my own life, I ended up living more carefully just to capture better footage.
"And it's surprising—and honestly moving—how many people seem interested in me as a person."
"I noticed that too. The atmosphere among your subscribers is… how should I put it? Everyone just feels kind and warm."
I nodded easily.
"Whether it's a subscription, a like, a share, or a comment—I'm always grateful to everyone who resonates with the videos in any way."
It didn't feel like I was just talking into the void; it felt like we were living and sharing the same moment together.
"Knowing there are people who remember this moment with me… that feels really special."
By the time the interview wrapped up, both Luca and Reni were fast asleep.
Perfect. While the kids slept, the adults moved straight into the next phase of filming so we could finish as much as possible.
"Author, if you're all right with it, let's start with the most important part—the cake shoot."
"Ready when you are."
They reset the cameras and we reshot the process footage for the recipes from the beginning.
I wanted everything in a single clean take, so I moved with total focus.
"Author, if you don't mind, could you also weave in the reasons you came up with these recipes as you go?"
That request came from the director, not Kelly—probably to make editing easier later.
"Of course. The overall color palette for this cake came from…"
I explained without stumbling while my hands kept working, finishing one recipe after another.
Whenever a dessert was plated, the staff whisked it away for its own separate beauty shots.
I don't know how long I stayed locked in that intense concentration.
Thud.
I finally let out the breath I hadn't realized I was holding and set the last plate on the counter.
"That's the last one."
A staff member snatched it up at once and began shooting.
While I watched and stretched my back, Kelly and Evan walked over.
"Author, thank you for all your hard work!"
"Thank you."
"Both the video and the photos look like they're going to turn out even better than we hoped. Truly, well done."
Evan, who earlier had gone off to calm himself down, now looked sincerely delighted.
I managed a clumsy smile and thanked him.
"I can't wait to start editing. We captured far more than I expected."
"Please take good care of it."
Yep. This man is a workaholic…
On the way home, someone else was buzzing with excitement too.
While I had melted into a limp, exhausted heap once the tension left my body, Cassandra's face was glowing.
"Jun. We won't see the final product until next spring, but today was really impressive. Once the recipe book comes out, I think your popularity is going to jump another level."
"Thanks. You worked hard today too, Cassandra."
Because it was her, I could leave the sleeping kids without a single worry, and that was why we had finished the shoot so quickly.
"But how do actual celebrities do this kind of thing over and over? I feel completely drained."
I had no regrets—I knew I had given it everything—but if someone had asked me to do it again tomorrow, I would have said no.
"Celebrities usually have great energy, don't they? People who actually get stronger under the lights… And a lot of it is just familiarity. After a few more chances like this, you'll feel a lot more comfortable too. How was today for you?"
"I don't even know how any of it happened. It just… went by."
I gave her the honest answer, and Reni—bright-eyed again after his nap—jumped into the conversation.
"Daddyyy, I loved it so much! I want to do it again!"
Cassandra laughed with pure delight.
"Right? Next time we'll tell Daddy we want to do it again."
"Okay!"
"What did you like so much, Reni?"
Reni raised both arms and drew a big circle in the air.
"The air was sparkling and warm!"
"Ah, so that's how it felt."
Looks like the superstar potential ran in the family after all.