What a Surprise
Even before I had the Manito App's help, I'd always been pretty good with my hands.
So assembling a kids' tent that actually came with instructions was nothing. With Cassandra sitting beside Luca and watching him for me, I was able to work even faster.
As I hammered and clicked the pieces together on my own, Cassandra started talking to Luca.
"Luca, look how well Daddy's doing all by himself. Right?"
"Yeah."
Since the time-lapse footage wouldn't pick up any sound anyway, I joined the conversation naturally while I worked.
"But why does Luca always give Greg such a hard time? He answers everyone else just fine."
Whenever Greg said anything to him, Luca's first move was to smack Greg right in the mouth.
"Who knows. Maybe it's some kind of pecking-order thing?"
"Why on earth would a baby need to establish dominance over a grown man…"
Even while we chatted, my hands kept moving, and before long the tent had taken on its proper shape.
"Oh…"
I stepped back for a mid-assembly check and realized the tent was bigger than I'd expected.
Cassandra seemed to think so too, still holding Luca's arms and pumping them up and down like a little workout.
She swept Luca's hands in a big circle and sang the words at him like a nursery rhyme.
"It's so big, isn't it, Luca? No wonder your big brother calls it a castle!"
"……"
Luca sat with his mouth slightly open, staring at the enormous tent that had appeared out of nowhere.
Calling it a castle was a stretch—it really just looked like two regular tents joined side by side—but still…
"Luca, want to go inside?"
I scooped him up off the sofa and set him at the entrance. He sat there a moment, looking around, then spun around and started crawling all over the inside.
"There are window-shaped openings, so the kids shouldn't feel cooped up."
Cassandra peered in and out of the tent with open curiosity.
"Yeah. Some parents even make fabric curtains for them, or hang a garland with the kids' names on the roof."
"That sounds lovely. The kids would feel like they'd gotten their own secret hideout. I'd love to do that for Charlie, but I'm afraid he's already too big."
When Cassandra waved at Luca through one of the little windows, he grinned and crawled back out.
"Luca, do you like the tent?"
"Yeah."
The way he sat there beaming, pumping his hands up and down, left no doubt he was thrilled. Why did kids love these little separated spaces so much?
I pressed a soft kiss to the top of his adorable head.
Luca had come out as far as the entrance, but he didn't seem eager to leave. I left him right where he was and lined up the boxes of decorations beside the tent, sorted by type.
First, five boxes of green tinsel for draping over the roof.
Christmas ball ornaments striped red and white, plus a set of ice-clear snowflake ornaments.
Oversized gold stars—ten of them, because Reni had insisted a Christmas tree needed more than one—and strings of Christmas lights.
On top of all that, I'd stocked up on chunky wooden ornaments big enough for the kids to play with like toys.
"You really prepared a lot. Honestly, Jun, you look more excited than anyone."
"Do I?"
Maybe she was right. Until now I'd never given Christmas a second thought, but once I started looking into it, there was so much to see.
I'd already filled a shopping cart with even smaller, prettier decorations I wanted once the boys were a little older. For now, anything they might put in their mouths and hurt themselves with had to stay on hold, no matter how much I wanted it.
Who would have guessed that someone who'd grown up in a church without the slightest interest in any of this would end up finding so much joy in it?
Well. Good things were good things.
"Everything we need is ready, so once Reni gets home from preschool we can decorate together. After that we'll put a mattress inside and finish the interior."
I'd even prepared battery-powered lamps the kids could switch on inside the tent.
When I held up two little lights that looked just like camping lanterns, Cassandra laughed and shook her head.
"There's always that one house where Dad is more excited than the kids."
"Even so, I'm sure Reni will be more excited than me."
After Cassandra left with the footage she'd shot, I had a simple lunch with Luca and put him down for his nap.
"Uungh."
The moment I started pacing in front of the terrace, where the winter sun still poured in, Luca's face clouded over in a sulky pout.
Ever since he'd figured out that this was what I did when I was putting him to sleep, he'd been like this every time. Sorry, buddy. No choice.
"If you sleep now, you can play with your big brother later and have lots of fun. Otherwise you'll want to play but you'll also be sleepy, and then you'll just fuss, won't you, my baby?"
"Yeah."
"Yeah, you think so too?"
Luca looked thoroughly betrayed, but I couldn't help smiling. Thank goodness he still couldn't say "no."
I couldn't keep teasing him forever, though, so I softened my voice and rubbed his back as I whispered.
"Your big brother's napping at preschool right now too, so don't feel too wronged."
"……Yeah."
Even in that thoroughly grumpy little voice, he still answered every time. I fought down the smile tugging at my lips and went on in a deliberately solemn tone.
"Do you have any idea how precious these years are, when you get to take a nap every single day?"
"……Uuungh."
His answers were getting slower. He'd be out any second.
Full belly, warm sun, Dad patting his back—staying awake would have been the hard part.
And holding this warm little body against my chest, murmuring whatever came to mind, always made the drowsiness creep up on me too.
"How long will Daddy get to put you to sleep like this, my baby?"
"……"
Part of me couldn't wait for him to grow up—to hold real conversations, to be out of diapers, to take easy little trips together. And yet…
When that day came, he probably wouldn't cling to me like I was his whole world anymore. The thought of a future that hadn't even arrived yet already left me a little wistful.
"Luca, you asleep?"
"……"
I laid the already-sleeping Luca gently on the bed and got busy. I cleaned up from lunch, then wrapped the Christmas gifts for the preschool teachers.
After researching what a parent was supposed to prepare, the consensus was that a modest gift card was both easy to put together and easy for the recipient to accept without feeling burdened.
I could have skipped it entirely, but…
I just couldn't bring myself to let it pass. These were the people who took such good care of my precious child, after all.
One of them was even a co-author on the recipe book, which made it feel even more important. Once the book came out next year, we'd almost certainly cross paths again outside of school.
Maintaining good relationships seemed worth the effort, so I'd fretted over what to give and finally decided to take a cue from the bridesmaid gift sets I'd received at Cassandra's wedding.
I'd settled on filling boxes with things the teachers could actually use, and over the past few weeks I'd bought the pieces one by one.
First I lined pretty gift boxes with tissue paper.
On top went a snowflake-patterned mug perfect for the long winter, a set of chamomile tea bags good for the throat, a soft, well-made handkerchief I'd chosen because it felt a little warmer somehow, and—as a bonus—a tin of handmade gingerbread-man cookies.
I closed the lids on two identical boxes, tied them with pretty ribbons, and finished the wrapping. Then I stretched my legs for a bit beside Luca before heading out to pick up Reni.
"All right, everyone rest well and see you next year! Merry Christmas!"
"Merry Christmas! Happy New Year!"
Bright, cheerful voices from teachers and students rang out ahead of winter break.
The moment the dismissal bell rang, the kids didn't run straight to their moms and dads the way they usually did. Instead they clustered in little groups, chattering among themselves.
Watching closely, I realized they were exchanging something. Christmas cards they'd made, maybe?
Whatever it was, it worked out well for me—I took the chance while the kids were busy and handed the gifts to the teachers.
I wasn't the only parent with something to give, so after a quick greeting and the handoff I went back to waiting for Reni in the hallway.
"Daddyyy!"
Apparently satisfied with his goodbyes to his friends, he came running with several envelopes clutched in his hands.
"Hey there. Did my boy have a good day?"
"Yeah! I was so busy! I wrote so many cards again today!"
"Did you now. That's my firstborn. Amazing."
I praised him and ruffled his hair.
Lately it had become routine for him to come home from preschool with all sorts of cards. Of course he still couldn't write properly—mostly he just copied whatever was on the board—but still.
"This one's for you, Daddy!"
Reni thrust a card at me as if he couldn't wait another second.
To keep from blocking the people streaming past, I got Reni settled in the stroller with Luca, sat down beside them, and opened the card.
Inside a big drawn heart, the words "Daddy" and "Merry Christmas" were written in rainbow colors—and between them stood a little scarecrow with eyes, a nose, and a mouth.
That was probably supposed to be me. But…
…why was there so much white hair on top of the black?
He'd clearly colored the hair with a black crayon and then dragged white crayon lines right over it.
I was a little shaken, but I didn't hesitate long before praising him.
"Wow, Reni drew Daddy. Thank you, son. You drew Daddy so well."
"Yeah!"
He answered with a proud, happy face.
"Really, really well. And look how good your writing is now too."
"Heehee."
Pleased and a little shy at the same time, he took Luca's hand and swung it gently side to side.
But I was having a hard time looking away from the card.
Part of it was being moved that he'd drawn me at all. But more than that…
I couldn't take my eyes off that head of hair speckled with white.
Did I… have gray hair? Not just a strand or two—this much?
Maybe I never spent long enough looking in the mirror, or maybe it didn't show from the front, but if he'd drawn it like this, I definitely had gray hair.
Still only in my mid-twenties, and already going gray.
Of course gray hair would come for me someday, and it wasn't as if anything terrible would happen when it did, but still…
"……"
The rule was to praise unconditionally and never question a child's art, but I had to know about this one.
Still smiling, I held the card up for him to see. Then, as lightly as if I were asking about nothing at all, I said,
"Hey, Daddy's hair has a lot of white in it, huh?"
"Yeah! Daddy's hair goes sparkle-sparkle!"
"Ah…"
I'd been bracing for something like "Yeah, Daddy has lots of gray hair!" But apparently Reni had just been trying to show light reflecting off my hair.
"I see. Daddy can't see himself, so it's a good thing Reni told me."
My beautiful boy puffed out his chest and beamed.
And I, somehow both mortified and deflated at the same time, burst out laughing.