Ah, So Dirty! (1)
As I leisurely strolled through the parking lot, kicking up sand around me.
Holy shit. Nile Sand Bog—this spell guzzles 3 whole points of mental power in one go. Sure, it lasts a good while and covers a whopping 50-meter radius while selectively wiping out specific targets, so it's an amazing skill, but 3 MP? Fuck.
The apartment complex is pretty spread out, so the zombies scattered here and there had gathered up. Probably about 100 around Buildings A and B, another 100 near E. And more were slinking in. Nice. Real nice. But, uh... can I take them all? Whatever, let's herd 'em first. Herd and slaughter.
I looped around the parking lot. The zombies groaned and shuffled after me. Yeonsu and Hye-yun took one look at them and bolted inside, scared shitless.
"Mr. Bunny Bunny~ Where ya~ hoppin' off to~!"
Belting out the song at the top of my lungs while circling the lot, the zombies fixated solely on me, ignoring everything else. I herded them good, packing them tight until there was nowhere left to run.
The moment a zombie grabbed my shoulder and neck—
"Hoppin' high and mighty~! Nile Sand Bog~!"
I slammed my staff down. Light flashed out! A massive sand zone formed. Hundreds of zombies collapsed in a heap at once. The area holds for about 10 seconds. I waddled straight into the densest pack.
Whoosh—the zombies crumbled like autumn leaves the instant they touched the zone, turning into sand piles with their groans. Fucking awesome. So damn satisfying. Pure bliss. Herded like 200, wiped 'em with one spell. Closer to 300, maybe?
Mental power has reached its limit.
"Yeonsu! Hye-yun! Looks safe now—hang tight just a bit!"
Dispersing.
Poof. This time, I summoned Builder Nephmes, flung open the front door, and dashed out. Buck naked, barefoot, rag around my waist, hammer in hand. No mask on my face, but this getup? Unmistakable. Nephmes has decent athleticism—not warrior-level, but fast as hell. Reached the apartment entrance in a flash, swung the hammer—thwack! Caught it.
"Yes!"
"Kyaa!"
"Eek!"
The girls jumped in surprise. I shrugged and scooped up the staff.
"Why the freakout? It's me."
"D-Dog... Mask... sir?"
"G-God... nim?"
"Yeah, it's me."
"...No mask...?"
"That staff guy earlier... wasn't wearing one either..."
"Never wore 'em to begin with. The masks—ugh, whatever. Anyway, looks like cleanup's done. Let's go."
"Ah..."
The girls stood awkwardly. The parking lot? Total sand dune now. Like a mini-desert plopped down. Hilarious.
"G-God-nim."
"Yeah?"
"Th-There... how many of you are there? Why do they keep coming?"
Ah, the avatars confusing 'em. I shrugged.
"Just me. Not multiples. Literal avatars—you saw 'em disperse."
"Th-That's true, but..."
Something's up.
"What? Changed your mind?"
"...No... not really..."
"I haven't." Hye-yun. Her eyes... getting bigger, like saucers.
"God-nim. Turning zombies to sand is just... too much. If we stick by you, we're safe, right?"
"Of course." I thumped my chest.
"Nothing gets in my place. Zombies, monsters—I'll wipe 'em all."
"Let's go, Yeonsu. Yeah? Come on."
Hye-yun grabbed Yeonsu's hand and dragged her over. I chuckled and led the way.
"God-nim."
"Yeah?"
"Um, your face right now—the avatar face is your real one?"
"Yeah... avatars are buff, but real me's average. Face is the same, though."
"Ahh."
"What? Ugly?"
"No. Just... better than I thought."
"Yeah?"
Chatting and grinning, we reached my ground-floor apartment.
"Hold up. I'll get the door."
Desummoned Nephmes, bolted up from the sarcophagus in my bedroom. Shorts and tee. Not bad. Fresh from the closet—no stink. Sniffed the shirt anyway. Opened the front door.
Yeonsu and Hye-yun stood there.
"Come on in."
"...God-nim?"
"Yeah, me. Get in."
Seeing human me, they averted their eyes.
"What's up? First guy you've seen? Or too used to naked dog-mask dude?"
"...Didn't expect clothes. Right?"
"...Yeah."
"I'm wearing clothes, fuck. Those were avatars."
I laughed and beckoned. "In you go."
As they brushed past—
...This smell real?
I froze mid-door-close. Should I leave it open? Holy shit, it's bad!
"C-Cough."
Damn, eyes stinging too.
"You two."
They were poking around the place but snapped to attention beside each other, faces tense. Tension's not the issue.
"Sorry to say this, but... let's wash up first."
Four months outside, no baths? Skin like coal dust sprinkled on. Black grime or dead skin flakes everywhere—like touring a coal mine. Clothes shredded and filthy. Worst? The stench. Unforgivable—like rolling in a sewer full of shit clumps ten times, then sun-dried. Dignity-shattering reek.
"No, seriously, how'd you live like this? Hate saying this to girls, but you gotta wash. No joke. Bathroom's got the tub full—meant for laundry, but use it."
Heading to the bathroom door, nose unplugged was polite enough. They're that bad.
"Bathroom cabinet's got bubble bath powder, body wash, shampoo, rinse. Razor too if needed—use it all, get clean first."
They just held hands, glancing nervously. Socks, fuck—how do socks turn that patchy black? Zombie apocalypse that rough for clothes? Stores full of zombies, fair enough.
"And, uh, toss your clothes in the hamper. Sorry, but... ain't salvageable even washed. Bin 'em."
Hamper's in the bathroom.
"Strip, dump 'em, leave outside—I'll trash."
"...No clothes left..."
"Yeah. This was me and Grandpa's place—guy clothes only. I'll grab tees, shorts, whatever fits. Women's stuff later when I send an avatar scavenging—plenty then."
Straight to my room, yanked open drawers—tees, shorts, undies stacked neat. Piled 'em in my arms, dumped on the floor.
"Pick what fits. All washed, clean. Some brand-new, never worn. Ditch yours, change."
"...U-Undies over there..."
"Bra..."
"Sorry, no women's undies. Dude house. Like I said, women's clothes soon as I can—"
Couldn't hold it. Fuck, smell spreading in my house. Rushed around—balcony, kitchen, my room, spare room—flung every window wide. Zombies nearby cleared, all windows barred with Nephmes' sand bars. Air in, nothing else.
Need that air!
"Okay, uh? Bath time. Now, urp. Go on."
They eyed each other, mumbled.
"...We smell that bad...?"
"I barely notice..."
No answer needed. Noses numb. Whatever.
At the bathroom door in "go-in" pose. They glanced, entered together. Door shut. Locked.
Urp, fuck. Brushed past—stink assault. Dry-heaved again.
Knocked. "See the stacked jugs? All water. Use it up, get thorough. Need anything, holler."
"U-Um, God-nim."
"Yeah?"
"Any... trash bags and scissors...?"
"Scissors for?"
"Haircut."
Hm. Kitchen—scissors and spare trash bag from cabinet. Knocked. Door cracked. Still dressed. Handed 'em over, door slammed.
"Th-Thanks."
Yeonsu, awkward. I smirked.
"Yeah. Need more, call."
"Yes, God-nim."
Good. Girls tucked in bathroom. Now, XP time.
To bedroom, into sarcophagus. Lid slid shut. Don't need to lie here, but fuck, comfy. Wanna sleep forever. Weird saying coffin-sleep, but that cozy.
Anyway, today? Coins galore.
Jackpot. Wanna level three avatars, but can't. Water's cut off. Plus, post-level spending. Combat juice spent today—no more gains. XP's easy in zombie spots anyway. So, chill greed.
Builder and Producer: Nephmes and Nephaquet, leveled each.
Why? Girls here now. Solo? Combat focus. Roomies? Fortify home base.
Hit Level 3—new skills.
Pulse Conduit 𓄿 𓈖 𓏽
Immortal Servant 𓄿 𓈗 𓀝
Vague feel for 'em, but test to know.
Summoned Nephmes—lid pierced, eyes met.
"Pulse Conduit."
Hammer tip swirled sand into shape: jar with round side hole. Canopic jar? Grandpa mentioned. Oval with falcon-head lid—for organs or ashes?
This one's side-hole unique. Living room cabinet table by TV—space there, placed it.
100 Coins consumed.
Fuckin' insane. Tiny jar, my-forearm-sized, that pricey? Sand-formed, empty. Needs power separately.
"Builder's no joke."
Coin-munching beast. Touched jar: "Coins in." 20 gone instant.
"Crazy."
120 total on one jar. Plus 20/day drain. What the hell?
Charged—yellow light filled side hole, moved to falcon eyes on lid. Eyes glowed. Light spiderwebbed walls, spreading.
Bzzz—fridge hummed on. Lights flickered alive.
"...Fuck yeah."
Back to civilization.