Chapter 17
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Translator: MadScientist
Chapter: 17
Chapter Title: Why Is She Climbing Into Bed?
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Why is she coming into the bed?
[Title: Holy shit. Why do my eyes keep sweating lately?]
Why do tears keep falling out of nowhere lately?
That occasional strangely wistful feeling? Like you've lost something precious?
Lately, I've been having weird dreams. Dreams where a Muggle with 100 mana joins the Archmage Gallery and casts 5th-circle magic? And spills academy stories while having a blast in the gallery?
I always jolt awake from those dreams and rush to check the gallery, but no matter how much I look, his name isn't there... Of course it isn't; it was just a dream, so why would I go looking for a Muggle in the gallery?
Right? It's ridiculous, isn't it? A Muggle joining the gallery?
But then... what are these tears streaming from my eyes? It feels like... I've forgotten something important... Is this really... just a dream?
This guy's just decided to wipe his memory.
What was that guy's name...? Fu... definitely Kim... Kim... Kim... fried rice or something?
What bullshit.
Heh heh heh... There was a Muggle who joined the Archmage Gallery back in the day...
That wasn't a dream. Kim Muggle's dead.
Makiyaaaaah!
[Title: Lulu-chan is sad]
Lulu-chan is wronged. Lulu-chan was out on Magic Girl duty and missed the gallery, so didn't know this happened to Kim Muggle.
Gallery folks are dummies. If Lulu-chan had been there, she'd have taught him Magic Girl transformation and saved him!
Bring back Kim Muggle!
Lulu-chan is mad! At least he could've died when Lulu-chan was in the gallery!
Magic Girl transformation? You're the only one who can do that.
She's just mad she missed the bait lol.
I was wondering why you weren't around. This guy's been out on a mission. But it's already over. Kim Muggle isn't coming back. Kim Muggle... he's not coming back!
Ah, I've been enjoying the gallery lately. Too bad.
That's why I said use swords from the start (swordfight con).
No, but seriously, those academy bastards from that dimension are real scum. Retiring him right at the start? Where's that ever happened?
Not confirmed dead yet. High possibility, though.
Hey Jootak, what are you doing? Confirm Kim Muggle's survival quick.
Hmm.
[Title: Hoooooooook]
Hoooooooook I'm cumming oooooong oooong oooong hooong oooots o sogogogo hogogok gogogo ogogo gyogogyo gyukgigio gyukgyuk gyo gupbigyo go yro o hoooooooong oooooook
Vweeheeeeeet...! Vworrot! Vworrot...! Heut...!
Fuck, don't do yas here.
Finally lost it.
Fuck.
Hooooong oooong g go yo o yo g go yo g o yok o yo g o gung g k
Basically means Kim Muggle died and went nuts.
Where the hell is Jootak? Gallery's not being managed. Overflowing with crap posts. No confirmation on Kim Muggle's status.
So when do we get the redhead and mammaries 3P story!!
Hoooooooook!!!(That's what I said!!)
Fact is, the gallery's always had tons of crap posts. Jootak's probably running auto-management magic and handling business. Which mage here isn't busy?
Jootak's running auto gallery management magic? No wonder tactical nukes don't work when he's gone.
Then just develop a tactical nuke toss magic that overrides Jootak's auto-management?
Illegal magic in gallery = permaban. Read the notice.
Oh.
The reason Archmage Gallery is clean is thanks to Jootak's management magic...
But fuck, why doesn't it filter this crap?
It's just cumming, not crap;;
Fuck; Archmage Gal average;
"What the hell is this?"
I muttered as I habitually checked the gallery the moment I opened my eyes.
First thing after waking up: hit the gallery. National rule.
Only after gauging the gallery vibe do I check my surroundings and status.
"An unfamiliar ceiling..."
As I dismissed the gallery screen, a pristine white ceiling I'd never seen before came into view.
Looking down at my body, I was lying in a fresh white blanket on a fresh white bed.
And around me: displayed medicines and other beds.
The air was comfortably humid and temperate, stirring memories of elementary school for some reason. This place was...
"The infirmary."
Yeah. The academy infirmary.
Combining this fact with the gallery's state, I could roughly piece together what happened.
Looks like I survived the fight with the Silver Fur Bear.
"Gotta report my survival to the gallery first."
Waking up and notifying the academy is important, but the gallery comes first.
It's not just because I'm a gallery addict to the bone.
I definitely passed out during the Class Placement Exam.
And I nearly died because the auto-protection magic failed.
There had to be some conspiracy, shadow plot, or issue at play.
I didn't think so, but it might've targeted me.
No guarantee something else won't happen again.
For now, best to ask the archmages for advice on how to proceed.
These guys know academy culture inside out for some reason. Magic academies seem similar across dimensions.
I'm not some webnovel transmigrator with prior knowledge; info's scarce for me.
Safest to ask the gallery every time something crops up.
Glad you guys are here, gallery fam...!
[Title: Guys, where am I?]
(Photo of unfamiliar white ceiling)
Um... sorry, but where am I...? Opened my eyes and saw this strange ceiling. Some hospital room? Infirmary? But I don't remember who I am or where this is.
And suddenly there's this Archmage Gallery...? floating in the air. What is this? Who are you guys?
Does anyone know me? Where is this? What's the Archmage Gallery?
Wait. Someone just opened the door and came in fu ck s omeone's co ming in here sh it
"Heh."
That's that. But gotta pull some aggro.
Thought about a three-line drip, but the archmages would spot it quick.
Can't waste this prime troll bait so lamely.
Leave it like this for a bit and see reactions. Heh heh.
Shit, what the fuck is this?
???
What? This guy's alive? No way, for real?
Hawawaowa?? Kim Muggle's alive? Post properly!
No fuck, don't joke. Real amnesia?
Don't mess around.
?? For real? How'd you lose your memory? Possible to lose memory?
Hmm... Anyway, he's alive, so probably took out that bear. Did melee, so possible head injury from physical damage. That magic didn't block physical, right?
Yeah, it only blocked symmetric magic... But defense magic against physical is tough, couldn't teach it :(
No fuck but if it's troll, good. If real, hasn't he been captured already?
Would he hit post while getting nabbed? Obviously troll. Come out, spill the story if alive.
Not funny, come out already. Say you're alive.
Hangoong eung eung grr cummed...! What the hell happened...!
No fuck, you basement idiots. Heads get hurt in fights too. Melee with that bear and expect no damage? Don't fuck around, he's captured now.
Where captured? Muggle like Kim Muggle, who targets him? Unless tangled with royalty or something.
Was with that Top Student at the end. Maybe collateral targeting her?
"Hah, pure gold."
Comments piling up in seconds.
Was worried these smartasses wouldn't bite, but their smarts had them theorizing wild possibilities, falling right for it.
"More importantly, why the hell did I do this?"
Reading comments, even I started wondering.
The academy didn't seem like it'd run exams that sloppily.
Something shady happened: 5th-grade beast loose, protection magic failed.
Honestly, didn't look targeted at me.
Ian Isaac's just a plain commoner. Walks by unnoticed. Not famous.
Oh, right before entrance exam, one kid recognized me.
But just that one. Otherwise ordinary. That girl seemed ordinary too.
Realizing this, I snapped out of troll mode. Not the time for gallery pranks.
Better explain the situation quick and get next-move advice.
No sign of the health teacher; infirmary stayed quiet.
Seems safe here for now, so consult archmages before heading out.
Just as I thought that and went to make a new post...
Rattle—
"...!"
Suddenly, the infirmary door slid open.
I hurriedly shut my eyes and pulled the blanket up.
Perfect fainted act, like I hadn't woken yet.
Footsteps entered: thud thud.
Eyes closed, had to judge by other senses.
Didn't know who, cracking eyes might give me away—risky.
Could only hold breath, hoping my heartbeat stayed silent.
Preferably the health teacher. Didn't sound like it.
Footsteps thudded closer, stopping by my bed.
And the owner of those footsteps was someone I never expected here.
"Mm... still not awake..."
'Hisenna?!'
It was none other than Mammaries—my meal ticket—Hisenna's voice.
Why was she here? And saying I hadn't woken yet?
"Professors and TAs won't say what happened. Is he okay...?"
What? Just worried? Touching, Hisenna!
No, wait. What if some evil force cast mental confusion magic on me?
Nah, probably not. Mana flow around was stable, like nothing wrong.
Then open eyes? Didn't think Hisenna'd do anything to me.
Her mutterings sounded purely concerned.
Swish—
Then her body drew closer.
Hisenna placed her hand on my forehead.
"No fever..."
Mm. Soft touch, as expected from Mammaries.
Felt something squishy and moist against my arm subtly.
Yeah, better open eyes? Hisenna's fine.
But then...
Rattle—
Someone else opened the infirmary door.
"Hi, hiiik?!"
Hisenna started acting weird.
Couldn't see well with eyes closed, but she panicked, flailing briefly,
slamming the bed thump,
and what she did next was totally unexpected.
"I-I don't know...!"
Wriggle wriggle
Suddenly climbed onto the bed and crawled under the blanket.
Then wriggled right up against my body, holding her breath.
'What the hell's with her suddenly???'
What are you doing all of a sudden?