Pillow Talk (2)
"What even is Uncheong?"
"It was posted on the government office notice boards. Didn't you see it?"
"I'd rather spend that time looking at earrings or hairpins at the market one more time."
"B-but you must have heard the rumors at least, right? That Mother is selecting courtesans to send to Beijing this time…"
"Beijing?"
Geumryang's face crumpled.
"Ahh… so that's why you mentioned the Emperor. Because it's Beijing."
"Exactly. And there's a rumor going around that Mother put your name on the candidate list."
"I deliberately don't listen to rumors."
She looked down at the bed with gloomy eyes.
"The me in the rumors always turns into someone far too amazing…"
I'm not that kind of person at all.
She muttered it under her breath.
"Even when I do nothing, people keep elevating me. Saying I can do this, I can do that, that I'm demure and wise and outstanding at everything… stuff like that."
When in reality she was just a pervert who masturbated with her back hole while thinking of me.
"So I don't listen. I don't even know what Uncheong is."
"They're saying the Emperor is selecting his personal official courtesans. Who knows—if you're lucky, you might even receive the imperial favor."
Ah, she probably doesn't know what 'imperial favor' means.
"In other words… if the Emperor chooses you and you share a bed, you could become a consort or an imperial concubine."
Geumryang still stared at me with eyes that clearly didn't understand.
"His Majesty… wants me…?"
"I don't know. But they're going to pick the top three from Nakseonggwan to send, and people are saying you'll be included."
"No."
"What do you mean, no… It's not even your decision."
"No, no…. I'm not going to Beijing. I hate it."
"Huh??"
What kind of move was this now?
Of course, in my previous life the idea that "becoming the woman of the highest power is every woman's ultimate goal" would have been a controversial claim—but in this era, in this place, it was different.
Being at the Emperor's side was the greatest opportunity a woman could have to enjoy wealth and power.
In previous-life terms, it was like living at the exclusive production site for Bitcoin and getting to swallow the coins that got minted, too.
So Wolbaek crawling on her knees if she had to just to go to Beijing made perfect sense.
If she had the ability, Nakseonggwan itself had no reason not to send her.
But what was this?
They were offering to send her, and she still wouldn't go?
"Why—why won't you go?"
"…It's a long story."
The look on Geumryang's face as she said it was complicated and heavy.
"I only just started properly pulling my weight as a 'Beauty' in the first place…"
Even so, her face flushed red.
"A-and I only did night work for the first time today."
"So now—"
"No!"
I had been about to coax her in the spirit of a youth soccer team that had just won a championship being invited up to the pro roster—but her firm refusal shut my mouth.
"No! You're telling me to go to that lecher of an Emperor? Me, who just got started? I hate it…! I'm still a beginner among beginners! How am I supposed to know what he'd do to me?!"
She shook her head hard from side to side.
"There are so many things I want to learn, things I want to do! You're the same, Jin Yu, aren't you? You want to go down below the second floor of Nakseonggwan and walk the streets and the markets, right?"
"Well… yeah."
"I'm the same! I want to dance better, and sing more beautifully! I want to stay with my unnies longer, too!"
She squeezed her eyes shut, then looked at me with a desperate light in them.
"Hey, Jin Yu, did you know? There's an old saying—in heaven there is paradise, and on earth there are Suzhou and Hangzhou. I want to go there too! The things I want to do are piled up like a mountain!"
Suzhou and Hangzhou?
She meant the two famous resort cities beloved by the imperial clan and the nobility.
Right…
Well, Geumryang might have her own bucket list in her own way.
But still…
"Then what about Beijing?"
"Hm?"
"Traveling somewhere other than Yangzhou would be nice too. Wouldn't Beijing have the most things to see?"
"……."
At my casual remark, Geumryang's face immediately turned sad.
"Beijing… I hate it. Absolutely hate it."
"So, why."
"…I told you, it's a long story."
Hmm…
Thinking back, from long ago Geumryang had always gone quiet whenever a guest from Beijing arrived, or whenever talk turned to something happening in the capital.
I had always found it strange at the time… well…
"Alright. You must have your reasons."
"……."
"Then if Mother tells you to go, will you dig in your heels and refuse?"
"That's…"
"Even if she threatens to throw you out of Nakseonggwan if you don't?"
"That's…!!"
I knew.
Mother would never put it that directly.
But she would use methods far more terrifying than that.
If someone splattered ink on the picture she was painting, she was the kind of person who would use that ink as much as possible to finish the painting—my mother, Cheong-hwa.
But if the ink landed somewhere that would ruin the picture entirely?
"If she… said it like that…"
Then Mother would ruthlessly cut out the stained place.
It was the method of maintaining power I had watched her use more than a few times.
Bring in what has value, drive out what does not.
That was how she ruled Nakseonggwan.
…Of course, a Geumryang who couldn't go to Beijing could simply keep being worked in Yangzhou.
So even if she couldn't go to Beijing, it wouldn't ruin Mother's picture.
Right now I was simply curious about her answer.
With the light gone from her eyes, she forced her mouth open with difficulty.
"Then… I'd have to leave Nakseonggwan."
"Wow…"
She hated Beijing that much?
What was this?
Did she have some kind of trauma about Beijing?
But as far as I knew, Geumryang's hometown was Yangzhou.
"In that case, like Mok-hwa unnie said, I'd have to get pregnant with Jin Yu's baby ahead of time."
"H-huh?"
For a moment I stared at her, unable to believe the words had come from Geumryang's mouth.
Her eyes were still lifeless.
"Jin Yu."
She slowly came closer to me.
"I'm so happy right now."
The smile that bloomed on her face was the same one I had always seen—so why did that expression send a chill through me?
"So I absolutely refuse to go to that stinking city."
"O-okay. I get it, alright."
As if those words had been a signal, she blinked a few times and returned to her usual expression.
"And the Emperor…"
Her face flushed as she whispered against my ear.
"He won't fuck my back hole for me, will he? ❤️"
"Ugh, you pervert…"
"And what about the guy who pounded that pervert's back hole raw and even came inside?"
"…Fine. I'm a pervert too. There."
Geumryang laughed with a bright little giggle at how awkward I looked.
"Besides, I haven't even known Jin Yu for ten years yet. We still have so much more time to spend together. Do you want to grow distant from me?"
"It's not that, but…"
"Then please put in a good word with Lady Cheong-hwa. There are plenty of people far better than me, right? Like Wolbaek unnie."
Ohh?
How neatly that slotted right into my plans.
"Alright. I'll talk to her properly."
"Really?! Ehehe, Jin Yu really is the best!"
With that she threw herself at me and hugged me tight.
"…Hehe. Warm."
"You still want to hold me when I'm covered in sweat?"
"Because it's Jin Yu!"
"What kind of ridiculous reason is that."
"Want me to say it differently?"
As she spoke, she nuzzled her head against my chest the way cats choose their human.
"Because you're my Prince… ❤️"
My heart gave a hard thump.
Half thrill, half shock.
"…You can't say that carelessly, understand?"
"I know, I know."
Geumryang looked straight at me and grinned playfully.
"Jin Yu, hug me too."
"You really love being held."
Pretending I couldn't win, I wrapped my arms around her torso.
Lying naked on the bed holding each other like this, a strangely lewd warmth seeped between us.
"Young Master."
"Hm?"
Hearing Geumryang call me that was fresh all over again.
"…You'll… fuck me again, right? ❤️"
"If you behave prettily."
"Hiiing."
Where did she get off sulking.
"Ohui Geumryang."
—You, you know. You're one of Nakseonggwan's greatest treasures.
I turned the words I wanted to say into something more roundabout.
"…Tch."
Geumryang pulled her gaze away from me and buried her face in my chest again.
Then, quietly, she murmured inside my arms.
"Prince… you smell so good… mm, warm…… I'm happy."
My whole body shook like an aspen leaf.
The winter wind that blew in through every alley seeped in through the holes in my rags.
It was a wind sharp and cold enough to cut flesh.
"Huuu…. Hic…."
I curled myself tighter.
Even after the sun had set today, there had been no merciful people who would let me into their house.
I understood.
Two months ago I had overheard the kind couple who had taken me in—the wife whispering secretly to her husband.
What if they carelessly brought in a child who looked like a beggar, and then in the middle of the night when everyone was asleep she went looking for valuables like a petty thief and ran off with them?
I had wanted to deny it.
If they would just let me sleep in the shoe closet, I would leave quietly the next morning.
They didn't even have to feed me.
Just for this one night, please let me escape this cold that was freezing my whole body solid.
"C-cold…."
If you went deep into the alleys to escape the wind—deeper still—sometimes you got lucky and found a straw mat you could lay down or pull over yourself to sleep.
Today was the same.
The garbage heap where the capital's people threw away what they had left uneaten.
Slightly off to the side of it, two mats lay with a little gap between them.
"Ugh…."
…And in that gap, something that looked like a human shape was wedged.
The smell of spoiled food didn't bother me at all.
Those things got cleared away regularly, after all.
What was sitting on this garbage heap now couldn't have been there more than three days either.
And in this winter, three days was nowhere near enough time for food to rot.
But…
A corpse, no one touched.
"Huu… uuuu…!!"
Sss—
Superstitions about disaster coming if you carelessly touched a corpse meant nothing to someone who felt like she was about to freeze to death right now.
I carefully lifted the mat.
A long string of dark semi-solid, semi-liquid came up stuck to one side of it.
Fine.
I could just flip it and cover myself with the other side.
Looking at the corpse's face, he looked even older than the grandfather I had only glimpsed when I was very small.
Even so, my grandfather had worn clothes as splendid as any imperial clansman right up until he died—while this old man was wrapped in a sackcloth worse than the rags I was wearing.
For all that, he had apparently hated the idea of freezing to death enough to scrape together two mats and sleep here, only to freeze to death just the same.
Still, dying in his sleep made it a good death, maybe.
Squish—
I got the mat underneath by kicking the old man's corpse toward the garbage heap.
He slid off the mat, rolled, and came to a stop with his face against a pile of chicken bones.
Yeah. What do I care.
What mattered right now was that I had found a place to sleep tonight and something to cover myself with.
Rustle, rustle….
I flipped the mat on the ground and laid it down, then flipped the one I was holding and covered my whole body with it.
The smell of the thoroughly rotten corpse was foul enough to twist my nose sideways… but at least here the flesh-cutting winter wind didn't blow, and the ground was warmer than a sheet of ice.
"……It's warm… I am… warm right now…."
Five paces in front of the corpse.
A back alley of Beijing where no one walked.
My pink hair, fallen down to my chest, trembled faintly every time I swallowed a sob and hypnotized myself.
Until last year, could I ever have imagined setting foot on a street like this?
No—I couldn't even have imagined that people could exist in a place like this back alley at all.
"Hic… sniff, sniff… uk, huuu…."
I mustn't cry.
Crying takes strength too.
And after crying I get tired and fall asleep.
If I fell into a deep sleep like that, I would end up looking just like that corpse on the garbage heap.
Then tomorrow someone would steal the mats off my corpse too.
For now, I would only doze lightly.
Leaning against the wall, conserving as much strength as I could….
But maybe it was because I had walked the market floor in circles all day begging and searching for a place to stay.
A massive wave of sleep crashed over me.
"Hey."
"………."
"Are you dead? If you're dead, say something."
"………ngh."
"Oh, still alive?"
My eyes wouldn't open.
It was what happened when my uselessly long eyelashes froze stuck together.
At times like this I had to think of something sad quickly and make tears fall….
Haaaah——
"Euk?!"
A breath of warm air blew hard against my face.
Thanks to that the ice between my lashes melted, but I jerked my head back in advance, terrified the smell would hit me.
Anyone hanging around a back alley in broad daylight was at least a proper Beijing beggar.
And the mouth-stink of those types was almost exactly like rotting corpse.
"Fuck, the smell…."
"My. Does it smell? That can't be. I even chewed a fragrance pellet made of agarwood this morning."
A fragrance pellet?
How would someone like you even know about that luxury item.
Even my family had only been able to use them occasionally, back then.
Blink, blink….
I opened my eyes.
The world in front of me was bright.
"……G-goddess…?"
"My goodness."
And I could not believe the sight spread out before me.
An adult woman of overwhelming beauty—looking even younger than my mother—was squatting in front of me.
"Who… are you…?"
My lips were still trembling hard.
Covering myself with only a mat really had been too much….
"Hm?"
When I turned my head, what was draped over my shoulders was not a shabby straw mat.
It was a red fur coat that looked like it had belonged to the woman in front of me.
At the warmth of her body still left inside the coat, tears suddenly poured out of me.
"Euhp… kkh, uk, huuuk…!!"
"You're lucky, you."
"Huuu… hic, euhuk…!!!"
"To meet this Cheong-hwa in a place like this."
The woman took a handkerchief from her sleeve and kept wiping the tears streaming down my face.
"Th-thank… huuuk, euk, you. Sniff, for saving, meee…."
"You shouldn't be thanking me."
Then she used the handkerchief wet with my tears to wipe my face clean, stroke by stroke.
It was too pathetic to even call washing my face, but it had already been months since anything like water had touched my skin, and it felt refreshing.
The fact that my tears on the handkerchief still hadn't gone cold felt good too.
"Thank the potential that saved you."
"P-potential… sniff, sniff… what do I… have…?"
"The potential to become the most beautiful woman in this Central Plains."
"Hic…."
"Of course, the one who will become the 'best' already exists…"
She took my hand and pulled me to my feet.
I felt the fur coat fall down to my knees.
"You might have enough potential to threaten even that child."
"Anything…"
When I tried to kneel again, the woman's firm hand and strong arm held me upright.
"Anything… I'll do anything. Noble one, my name is—"
"Geumryang. To shine like gold."
"…What?"
"Your stage name. Let's make it Geumryang."
"…As you command, I will."
"Good, good."
She brushed my messy bangs aside and pressed her right hand to my forehead.
"My eye for people is never wrong."
The woman's pink irises were turning my heart inside out.
"Come on, let's go!"
With that she took my hand and led me.
"W-where are we going?!"
"How are you supposed to shine like gold looking that filthy? We have to go scrub you clean!"
When we stepped out of the back alley, the morning sunlight was dazzling.
And the woman standing in that morning light was so beautiful it took my breath away.
As if the reason this world existed was so that she could be born.
As if the reason humans were made was so they could marvel at her beauty….
"L-Lady Cheong-hwa…!"
"Hm?"
Without thinking, I called her name.
That alone made tears spill over, so full my chest ached.
"Thank you… euk! For saving… huuuk, me… thank you…!!"
Lady Cheong-hwa simply watched me quietly.
"Honestly."
"Hwaaang… ahk, huuu, hwaaang…."
"I told you to thank your own beauty, not me."
—If it weren't for that, I wouldn't even have glanced your way.
The words she murmured afterward were, looking back, far too cold.
But to me then, they sounded like the slightly playful salvation of a goddess.
While Lady Cheong-hwa led me by the hand into an inn and washed every part of my body with bathwater, my tears never stopped.
Because it was so warm.
Because I was so happy.